“Buffy?” Dawn questioned when the Slayer finally returned to the group.
Buffy looked at her sister’s concerned face, her baby sister, poor Dawn, God how could he have…
“Buffy?” Another concerned voice, Willow’s, her gaze questioning but supportive.
“Spike” She paused, the name tasted like acid in her mouth, “He went back to the motel. He said he’d do what ever we needed, just go get him”
“Buffy, what happened are you okay?” Dawn’s question sent anger coursing through her, how can you ask me that you lying little…
“Giles” she ignored the question. “Can you book overnight flights, we need to get to the hellmouth”
………………….
“It’s just too damn quiet, I don’t like it” Faith commented, eyes scanning the cemetery.
“Calm before the storm?” Angel asked his voice soft, eyes following hers out over the landscape.
“I reckon. I wish B and the gang ‘d get here already” she sighed leaning back further on the tomb they where sitting on she let her gaze travel to the star covered sky.
“Never thought I’d hear those words from you Faith” he replied with a dry chuckle, “Thought you liked being the head honcho?”
“Oh yeah man, I mean it’s cool and all, making the decisions giving the orders.” She sighed and turned her head to catch his eye, “but this is bad shit man, I figure we’re gonna be needing the big guns on this one. Say is Red coming too?”
“Giles said she would, Xander too, and Dawn” he frowned running his earlier conversation with the Watcher over in his mind, “he said they had a few ideas, and some reinforcements, funny he was a bit cagy on the details”
“Well you know Giles, likes to build up the melodrama” she sighed again, feeling strangely old in the face of the inevitable battle, perhaps she was old, for a slayer anyway, if not for B and Willow she’d have been dead years ago, just like all the chosen ones before her.
“Lets head back to HQ” she said standing and brushing herself off, before her thoughts could turn maudlin. “We wanna make sure we’re in the welcoming committee”
……………………
The pencil moved over the cheap motel stationary as if by it’s own volition. There was little hope of sleep, no dream that would not inevitably lead back to that awful scene.
Images of Buffy where scattered all over the bed in some her face was hard as stone, hatred burning in the greys of her graphite eyes, in others she was hurt, tears on her cheeks, pain and confusion on her face. He sighed and studied his latest creation, fear and betrayal screamed back at him from the page.
He dropped his head into his hands, he had put that expression on her beautiful face, his rough demanding hands, his merciless lust. He wiped angrily at the tears that forced their way past his closed eyelids.
He remembered that morning, the gentle playfulness, the easy affection, how could she behave like that, after what he had done, how could she forgive him. She would not forgive him this, he had seen it in her eyes when he told her what he had done to Dawn, she may be able to forgive the wrongs he had done her, but she would not forgive the transgression against her sister.
He sighed, turned over a new leaf of paper, picked up his pencil again and drew.
………………..
“Buffy” Dawn came into her room without knocking, concern for her sister overriding any thought of politeness.
“Buffy what’s wrong?” she crouched down in front of her sister “Come on Buffy, you know you can tell me anything”
“Hah” the sound was harsh, almost unrecognisable as her own voice. “But you can’t tell me anything.”
She caught the younger girls eye and held it “How the hell could you not tell me Dawn?”
“What Buffy? I don’t understand” Dawn’s protestation fuelled the Slayer’s anger.
“About what happened with Spike, you didn’t think that maybe I had a right to know?”
Dawn rolled her eyes “Buffy, we’ve been over this, there is no me and Spike”
“In the motel” she said it like a challenge, daring her sister to deny the truth.
“Oh.” A long heavy pause “Buffy I didn’t tell you, because” she took a deep breath Buffy wasn’t going to like this “because it’s none of your business”
There was a brief moment of silence while Buffy gaped disbelievingly at her sister, then she exploded. “None of my business?” she shouted angrily. “How can it not be my business?” she was up and pacing now, anger radiating from every pore “My boyfriend tries to rape my sister and it’s not my business”
“No it’s not” Dawn tried to keep her voice calm and reasoning. “Spike wasn’t your boyfriend then. And he didn’t try, he almost, he stopped”
“Now you’re arguing over semantics,” Buffy hissed angrily.
“No I’m not,” she countered. “He couldn’t remember us, he was just doing what any vampire would do”
“So it’s okay?” her anger was diminishing into hurt and confusion. “How could you let him be anywhere near you after that?”
“You did” an undeniable truth, but not an accusation. “I didn’t understand back then, I couldn’t understand how you could forgive him, let him back into your life. I understand now”
“Well I sure as hell don’t” Buffy almost screamed, “Spike came back from Africa with a soul, he was different.”
“He’s different now” she insisted.
“How?” the blonde challenged, hands coming to rest on her hips. “What’s changed in the last week? You tell me because I don’t know. What’s changed?”
“You” Dawn let the answer sink in for a moment before pressing on. “You, he found you again, that’s what changed. Spike doesn’t need a soul Buffy, he never did, all he ever needed was you”
“Dawn” Buffy began but trailed off, brow creased with half formed understanding.
"Angel and Angelus where different creatures” Dawn pressed on, ageless wisdom guiding her words “I never understood how when Spike came back with his soul he was still just Spike
“I was so angry with him back the, I thought it was because he wasn’t really sorry, that he didn’t regret what he’d done to you.”
Dawn paused searching her sister’s eyes for confirmation that the older girl was following her. “But I figured it out” She continued, suddenly impassioned. “The soul wasn’t a curse like Angel’s, it was a reward. He fought for it, and when he won it back it wasn't to torture him or suppress the demon it was to guide him. He wanted to be good before the soul all he needed was a moral compass. The soul and the demon weren't at war like Angel and Angelus, they had too much in common"
"Huh, what could his soul have in common with his demon?" Buffy’s anger seemed to have abated, genuine curiosity in Dawn’s reasoning taking its place
“Buffy” Dawn’s gentle voice held a hint of chiding, “You know what”
She looked down, face contorted in deep thought, finally she met her sister eyes “me”
………………………….
The day had been spent making arrangements, packing, peddling rusty excuses to bosses and tutors. Buffy had been grateful for the activity, anything to keep her mind off Spike.
Everything was ready, nothing needed doing or rechecking, Giles and Xander had not arrived and Willow and Dawn where making sandwiches for the journey, well it was better that airplane food.
So she was alone for a while, nothing to do but think. Was Dawn right? Was Spike a good guy just trying to find his way, relearning a centuries worth of forgotten morals. He had been a monster, she had always known that, he had never tried to hide it, never apologized for it. It was what he had been for a hundred years, was he different now, had love changed him. It seemed a foolishly romantic notion of course, but then this was Spike, the vampire that had earned a soul for love, even knowing what it would do to him.
She ran a shaky hand through her hair and plopped down on the bed. If he was truly willing too learn, could she teach him? Could she give him back right and wrong? It was a responsibility she wasn’t certain she could face. If she failed then innocent lives would be in her hands, but if she succeeded. Was Spike beyond redemption? True he was an unrepentant killer, a merciless demon, but he was also a compassionate man, driven by love to deny his very nature.
“Giles is here” Willow’s voice rescued her from her own circling thoughts
………….
“I’ll go” Buffy offered when they pulled up in the motel car park. She was out of the car and halfway to the door before anyone could acknowledge her.
One brief knock and she entered the unlocked room, “Spike” She greeted the vampire sitting cross legged on the bed, the bed where he had attacked Dawn, sketches of her own anguished face spread out before him. He tried to hide the images, hasty jerky movements, lacking his usual grace.
“Time to go Slayer?” he asked keeping his eyes averted.
“Yeah” she answered moving over to the shabby desk, covered with still more images, she recognised one as from their interlude in her bathroom the previous morning. Her own broad smile shone radiantly from the page and she returned the smile with a rueful quirk of her own lips. Had he really put that blissful expression on her face just a day ago?
She listened to him moving about behind her for a moment more before he spoke. “Ready” he informed her, the single word laden with guilt and regret.
“Okay” as she moved away some scribblings on the edge of an image of a smiling Dawn caught her eye, causing her to gasp audibly.
“You okay? He asked concern ringing in his hushed voice.
“Sure fine” she turned giving him a business like look, “lets go”
………………………….
Dawn had had enough, enough of watching Spike slink along behind the group like a whipped dog, enough of watching Buffy give the vampire alternately wary and sympathetic looks. Most of all she had had enough of the tension that hung heavy as molasses in the air.
With a determine toss of her hair she stood and strode over to where the vampire had positioned himself, leaning heavily on a mirrored pillar away from the rest of the group. “Giving yourself away there fang,” she told him, gesturing towards the empty mirror.
His sigh was so utterly desolate that she ached for him, “not much bothered what people think pet.” He told her keeping his eyes fixed on his steel toecaps. “You should head back over to your sister, no good you being anywhere near the likes of me”
Her irritated huff was obviously not what he expected, “Oh for Gods sake Spike stop being such a drama queen”
“Pardon?” he gave her a disbelieving, half offended look.
“You heard.” She told him sharply before her eyes softened and she reached for his arm, gripping it firmly when he tried to move away. “This is me Spike” she reassured him. “I know you’ve got Buffy worries right now, but this is me. Don’t shut me out, okay?”
“Pet you don’t understand…” he began only to be cut off by her unladylike snort
“Spike, I understand more than everyone gives me credit for. I’m like a billion years old.” Her attempt at lightening the mood was blessedly successful.
“Or ten” he countered with a wry chuckle.
“Children can be very perceptive” she let her mirth slip away, “I know you remembered. About what happened with Buffy”
“Yeah I remember” his voice was so low she almost didn’t hear him.
“But you don’t remember everything” she insisted firmly, “a lot happened before and after that you don’t remember.”
“Nothing that excuses what I did to her” he paused catching her silky hair in his fingers “or to you”
“Blah!” she exclaimed, “you keep your guilt trips for Buffy, me and you are okay, I know it wasn’t you”
“Then who the bloody hell was it?” his voice boomed in the near empty terminal causing Buffy to glance up sharply at them, he dropped his eyes where they met hers.
“There’s no one else Dawn, I’m no Angel”
“I know” she replied, “but you changed, for me, for Buffy, it wasn’t your fault you couldn’t remember”
He sighed shaking his head, “Dawn…”
“No” her voice was firm, “you can’t expect to get everything right right away, you’ll make mistakes, but you’re trying and that’s enough.”
“Not for Buffy”
“Oh I wouldn’t be so sure. Give her time” she slipped her arms around his waist and tucked her head under his chin, waiting patiently for his arms to come up hesitantly around her.
……………………………………….
“Flight 392 to Cleveland now boarding” Buffy watched as the announcement cause Dawn and Spike to pull out of their long embrace, Dawn scrubbing frantically at her face, while the vampire shook himself.
She was on the plane second, grabbing a window seat in front of Xander, Willow and Dawn came next, taking the two seats in front of her, already bickering over who was buying the in flight drinks.
He looked strangely comfortable in the modern confines of the plane, moving gracefully down the aisle, somehow she had expected the same awkwardness that Angel still exhibited when confronted with human technology. He glanced at the empty seat next to her and she found herself holding her breath, maybe he’d sit with her and they could talk.
He didn’t even catch her eye as he moved past her and flopped down next to Xander. “You mind mate?” he asked casually.
“A few hours sitting next to the evil dead, why should I mind?” Xander joked without malice.
“’Preciate it” Spike’s uncharacteristic politeness seemed to unsettle Xander.
“You alright man?” Xander asked with genuine concern. “You seem a little… off”
“Fan-bloody-tastic, say you gotta pencil and paper?”
“Er, not on me, but I bet the stewardess could get you one” He raised a hand. “Excuse me Miss”
…………………………
“They are on their way Sire” Solomon informed him, “They boarded a night plane just minutes ago”
“And the Slayers?” Marcus asked, running a hand over his chin thoughtfully.
“No movement, they appear to be waiting for the arrival. I suspect they will send an escort to take them back to their head quarter.”
“Undoubtedly.” He paused giving Solomon a hard look, “Make sure the welcoming committee is ready. I want her dead before she leaves the airport
“Yes Sire” the vaith gave a stiff bow before turning to leave.
“Solomon” Marcus eerily calm voice chilled the air in the room, stopping the demon at the door, “no mistakes this time. You understand?”
Solomon nodded without looking back and left the room, no mistakes.
He walked briskly to the where five men waited, mercenaries selling there automatic machine guns to the highest bidder, cruel blood thirsty men that would think nothing of murdering a pretty young girl for a few thousand pounds. No, no mistakes.
……………………..
Buffy wiped her sweaty palms against her denim-clad thighs, she was feeling antsy and unsettled. Giles who had settled down next to her had long since fallen asleep, as had the girls in front of her. Xander’s soft snoring was the only sound she could hear above the gentle hum of the planes engine, that and the never-ending scratch of graphite on paper.
She almost growled, from the moment Xander had acquired the materials Spike had been drawing. She understood why he did it, transferring his shattered memories to paper in and attempt to capture them. But the almost inaudible sound of pencil on paper was beginning to fray her already jangling nerves.
“No more fruit rollups mom” Xander mumbled, coming awake behind her with a start, “weird dream”. She heard him yawn and shift in his seat.
“Hey captain peroxide, what you drawing?” he asked quietly.
“Your girl” came the distracted reply, Buffy heard the rustle of paper as Spike handed the young man a selections of drawings.
Xander sighed as he studied the final picture, Anya’s expression was sad, her eyes spoke of a pain her strange innocence had not been able to understand, instinctively he knew what memories the vampire was sketching here, so it was no great surprise when Spike spoke.
“For what it’s worth, I’m sorry,” he offered, his eyes trained of the stewardess serving drinks at the front of the cabin. “If memory serves she was just drunk and lonely. Poor bint was just hurt is all, nothing more”
“You and her both” Xander replied his eyes still riveted on the image.
“You know” he began after a long pause, “it still eats me up that I put that expression on her face, that I did that to her. But you know what’s worse?”
He locked eyes with the vampire. “We wasted so much time, being scared and angry. Yeah it took her a long time to forgive me, but it took me even longer to let her. Coulda had more time if…” her trailed off before shaking himself.
“I wont ask if you want my advice” he told the vampire, “’cos I know you’d say no, so I’ll just give it. If you’re lucky enough to get a chance, you let her forgive you”
Buffy felt tears prick her eyes, dear Xander, impossibly perceptive Xander, how do you do it?
She closed her eyes, if she could, if she decided she could forgive him, would he let her?
………………………
“Flights on time” Faith informed them, walking back towards Angel and the small party of Slayers that where to act as escort, “I guess wonders’ll never cease”
“How long till they get in?” Angel asked eyeing the board warily.
“Ten minutes, then another ten with luggage collection. Should be back at Slayer central in an hour”
“Come on big guy” she took his arm, “let’s go get a coffee”
……………….
Technology was no match for the power of the old ways, cloaking spells made light work of airport security. The five stood in the centre of the arrivals lounge, armed with semi automatic machine guns and no one in the airport knew a thing about it.
“We kill them all” the leader informed them again, “But the girl first, no mistakes, we kill the blonde”
A grunt of understanding rippled through the group “Sir?” one asked warily “The vampire?”
“We stake him once the others are dead, it won’t be a problem” he assured “shhh!” A harsh whisper, bring there attention to the passengers getting off the plane. “Get in position”
………………..
Spike walked behind Buffy and Willow as they exited the plane, the others delayed by Dawn’s uncooperative hand luggage left slightly behind. Moving into the departure lounge he was aware of three familiar smells, one was Angelus’ unmistakable scent, the other a Slayer, but not Buffy, his mind flashed an image of feisty brunette, but it was gone too fast to decipher. The third smell was a strangely metallic, mechanical scent he couldn’t place, he reached back into his long history a saw the battlefields of the Second World War. There it was beneath the remembered scent of death and sulphur that same scent. His sensitive hearing picked up a quit click of metal. Gun oil!
With a shout of warning he pushed the two girls to the floor just as a shower of bullets flew overhead. Screams of pain and confusion sounded above them as the bullets found alternative targets. “Willow” he demanded, but she was already acting, mumbling magical words, and letting her power unravel the spell.
He glanced around as the magic crumbled, revealing five viscous looking gunmen, “Xander” Buffy’s panicked voice drew his attention to the young man bravely exiting the plane to come to his friends’ aid, “Oh God”
Xander had forgotten quite how strange an experience it was to look death in the face, he saw the armed men, heard Buffy’s cry strangely distorted in his unnaturally clear mind, in slow motion he watched one of the men aim towards him, and watched him slowly squeeze the trigger.
What he did not see was Spike, God had he really forgotten how fast those creatures could move, suddenly the vampire was in front of him, his body jerking violently as the automatic weapon peppered his body with bullets.
Time played catch up, hurtling uncontrollably towards the present, security where shouting orders uselessly, no help was coming from there, but help was coming. Twelve teenage girls, moving faster than any human should where amongst their attackers, high kicks and lightening fast hands knocking the weapons from the men’s’ grasps perfectly executed sleeper holds leaving them for human authorities to deal with.
Faiths voice sounded strongly from amongst them “Move” she ordered “Get out of here before the filth show up”
Spike turned to him, seeming obliviously to his own perforated chest, “You alright mate?” he asked blood bubbling up with the word to froth over his lips.
“Shit Spike” Xander was too slow too catch the falling vampire.
“I got him” Angel appeared, throwing the younger vampire over his shoulder in a fireman’s carry, “come on move”
A/N Wanted to post this yesterday, but I went shopping instead, two pairs of jeans, five tops and a pair of sunnies for 50 quid, bargain!
Hey Cali, glad I managed to surprise you, I was beginning to think you knew where I was going with this before I did. Thanks for the review, as always, Love and Hugs
Sorry Lizzy, I just like making it hard, hope you like the slight forward momentum in this chappy
Okay Kar anything you say just stop looking at me like that. Not really gonna continue to be a big tease, it’s just the way I am ;)
Quite right KMS, no shortcuts to luvin I’m afraid, I hate it when stories just make everything suddenly peachy, unless there’s a valid reason, like good wholesome PWP
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