“William, can I ask you a question?” Buffy asked later over dinner as they sat on the floor of his sitting room having sandwiches and chips. It’d started to rain some, and William had been adamant about wanting to have a picnic. She wondered if he was always like this; always this optimistic and exuberant or if he was trying to make things as light for her as possible. Whatever the reason was, she was happy for it, if not slightly suspicious.
“You can ask me anything,” William told and took a big bite off a pickle.
“With all the cases that Dru helped solve – did she ever get any backlash for it? You know, from families of the guilty? She would never tell me such things because she never wanted me to worry, so I was just wondering if you knew. You’d tell me, right?”
William smiled at her, “Yeah, I’d tell you. Well, she did come across individuals that were outraged, mostly out of shock that their friend or their family member could have done something so horrible, but she didn’t have any real problems with them. Those individuals were too caught up in the drama of how to help their loved one get out of the mess they were in to pay too much attention to Dru.”
“What about the criminals themselves?”
“Letters from prison were the extent of it, and those were few and far in between. Dru took to throwing them away once she realized whom they were from.”
“She led a charmed life, didn’t she?” Buffy said wryly.
“What makes you say that?”
“Things have a way of working out for her. I suppose it’s because she had more guts than I did. I preferred to retreat to the background and just blend into the wall. That was never good enough for Dru though, and rightly so. She had more daring, she was exuberant and full of life, people wanted to be around her. I was just the freak.”
“Buffy—“
“There was an incident once while I was in college. This girl had been found, shot in the head on the campus track. Her boyfriend was the prime suspect since they’d had a huge argument that night and the whole world it seemed had witnessed it. Not to mention, rumors had already been flying around about him and how he was abusive to this girl. I was in class with her sister the day her body was found and the news was delivered. I remember hearing her crying and screaming as if someone was ripping her insides out down the hall. And I remember most of all, her sister standing in front of me telling me that her boyfriend hadn’t done it. That she’d committed suicide and in her haste to get to the track before anyone could stop and talk to her, she’d left the note on her desk. She informed me that the note had fallen to the back of her desk –seemed she’d checked after she . . . realized she was . . . dead. She told me she’d been floating above her body and thinking that it was quite extreme of her to do and that everyone would probably blame her boyfriend. She wanted me to be the one to let them know he was innocent and that she’d done herself in. Even in death, she wanted to protect that abusive boyfriend.”
William stared at her, his eyes wide, concern and shock etched on his handsome features. “Wh—what did you do?”
“I was the freak, right? No one would believe me and I knew it. I left a note at the Dean’s office telling them where the note was. They found it and it helped in the case. Her boyfriend was released from custody and the family mourned her suicide.”
“Buffy, that was helping—“
“No it wasn’t. I was a coward. I didn’t go to the authorities. I didn’t even tell Dru. But what I think is something that could make me even more of a freak, even more of an outcast, is something that Dru turns into a successful career move. She’s got the Midas touch.” Buffy stood, grabbing her plate, “Everything I touch turns to shit,” she muttered and stalked off to the kitchen.
Getting up immediately, William was hot on her heels, following her into the kitchen. She placed her plate in the sink and spun to him. “What?”
He said nothing, but grabbed her and hauled her in his arms.
“Will—“
“I’m not turning to shit,” he whispered, “and you’ve touched me.”
Her eyes welled up in tears. “William, please—“
“It’s okay, Buffy, let it out. It’s okay. You’ve got a safe place to land here.”
“I – I can’t – I –“
“You don’t know how to cry?”
“I – can’t – let—go,” she said, stumbling on her words. “I’ll be…I’ll be weak.”
“Bullocks! I bawled my eyes out the day Fred died, and I bawled the day Dru died too – and I’m a man. I’m not ‘supposed’ to cry. Does that make me weak?”
She shook her head.
“Then cry, damn it.”
She laughed now through the tears that were in fact falling from her eyes.
He looked at her, wiping the tears away tenderly, gazing into her face imploringly. “You’re such a special woman, Buffy, you are.”
She shook her head, “No, I’m not. Dru was, I was just. . . there.”
He studied her thoughtfully then. “You’re jealous of her.”
She shut her eyes tight, “Yes,” she admitted hoarsely. “And I have no right to be. She’s gone and I – I shouldn’t feel that way anymore. She grew up in the same house and she turned out fine. What’s wrong with me that I didn’t? That I never felt normal, being able to talk to ghosts aside. I always felt as if I were on the outside looking in and I so much wanted to be part of everything but….”
“But what?”
“I was so afraid.”
“Of what?”
“That I’d fail. That I’d screw up and . . . and I could always hear my parents in my head telling me I’d never make it, that I didn’t have it in me to make it anywhere and in anything. I’ve always worked so hard to be something so I could prove it to them, but I forgot how to grow a personality and how to fun. I never knew how to do that and for Dru it always came so easy.” She shook her head, the tears falling free now. She never realized how good it could feel to just tell someone how she felt and to just cry. “And then she died on me and I thought ‘there goes my chance to learn one day’. I always thought of Dru as someone that was going to save me one day before I. . . before I just withered away. And now she’s gone and I don’t have anyone.”
“No,” William said forcefully and loudly, so loudly she jumped a bit. “You have me. You have me.”
“You barely know me!”
“I know what I need to know to have figured out that you are an amazing woman—“
“I’m not. There is nothing amazing about me. Dru was the amazing –“
“Stop it,” he said firmly, giving her a little shake.
She gasped at his forcefulness, and stared at him, her eyes wide. “William?”
“You are amazing. You are so incredibly strong, Buffy, don’t you see that? You’re so strong and brave. You haven’t given up yet; look at you, still here and still fighting. You’re smart and gorgeous –“
“I’m gorgeous?”
“Oh God yes, Buffy,” he breathed. “So bloody gorgeous.”
She swallowed hard.
“You…you’re… oh, fuck it.” Whatever control he had in check snapped, and the next thing Buffy knew, William’s lips were crashing down upon hers.
Wow, was the last coherent thought Buffy had.
[Reviews - 835]
-
Table of Contents [Report This]
Chapter or Story |
Chapter or Story | 
Chapter or Story
Has been viewed 3604 times
- Text Size +
-
Table of Contents [Report This]
Chapter or Story |
Chapter or Story | Chapter or Story - Text Size +