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Author's Chapter Notes:
In this chapter, I tried to reveal a little of what’s going on in Buffy’s head. Buffy’s own POV will definitely come in one of the many chapters ahead. Would be really great if you could stay around for that J.

"Then what were you referring to-"


"Not a what but rather a who."


"I'm not quite sure I'm getting you."


"You."


"Me?"


"You ARE my birthday wish."


Spike blinked. "I'm your...birthday wish?"


"U-huh." She grinned.


"You’re not by any chance drunk, are you?"


Buffy shook her head no then gestured him to sit on the edge of her bed beside her. "Stop being silly, Spike and tell me when was the last time we've spent some time alone with just the two of us?"


About Twelve months and 2 days to be exact. "I don't know. Six months? A year maybe?"


"The last time that you came here in my room was right before I started dating Riley. That's been more than a year now. I've missed you.” Then continued in a softer tone, “I've missed us."


Spike pulled her close to him once more and he heard her sigh of content. "This is what I wished for, Spike. You and me... here on my birthday."


He swallowed hard upon hearing her heart-warming declaration. " God Buffy! I miss being with you too. You don't know how much."


"You do?” She asked in a tone of disbelief “But why don't we spend some time together anymore?"


"A lot of reasons, pet. " He paused. Think you ninny! "I uh....Got busy with things at school and there has been some projects. " He rambled apprehensively."....Lots and lots of school projects. As a matter of fact, Dru and I -"


"Dru." She cut in sharply as she suddenly found herself pulling away from him.


Spike almost protested loudly from the loss of contact.


"So how did it go with her? Everything turned out as you've expected?" She asked with her back to him. Truth to tell, she doesn’t exactly want to know how his little rendezvous with the loony ho had turned out.


"I told her that there's some place I needed to be."


Buffy let go of the breath she didn't realize she was holding. "I'm glad to hear that."


"What I need from her can wait. "


"Oh." And just like that, she was back into full scowling mode. She briefly closed her eyes and tried to hold back a retort. Tonight was all about patching-up with her best friend. "Wait here. I'll be right back."


Buffy came out of the room briefly and went back a minute later with two slices of cake, forks and some bottled water.


"Wow! Is that chocolate chip mint cake?! " He asked excitedly.


"U-huh!"


"With cookies and fudge mint on top?"


"Our very own favorite!"


"That's bloody amazing, luv! I remember the last I ate this we were like 12." He told her, smiling like a kid on Christmas.


Buffy laughed at the memory. "I know! I was surprised myself. Go on. Have a piece."


Buffy got a piece out of her own cake and put it in his mouth. As she did, she had caught herself staring.... just staring at the way his lips almost closed over one finger. At the feel of his warm wet tongue grazing the sensitive skin , she felt a delicious tingle that travel all the way south. Just Imagine how that would feel if his tongue had been - Whoa! Her eyes instantly widened at the thought. Bad bad Buffy!



'"How was it?" She asked, trying to disguise the sound of apprehension in her voice and then ate a small piece out of her own cake.


"It tastes heavenly." Spike himself was still recovering from the sudden unexpected gesture to notice Buffy’s uneasiness.


Buffy almost choked on her cake when she heard his reply.


"Wish I could have more though."


"Huh?"


He showed her the empty plate.


"Oh." She gave herself a mental slap. Geez, get your mind off the gutter, Summers.


Spike saw the way Buffy blushed and wondered if she had caught the hidden sexual innuendo behind his words


"I could go down and get you another slice but mom asked me to save some for the rest of the gang."


"She knows I'm here?"


"Yep. I ran into her on my way to the kitchen."


“What else did she say? I hope she’s not upset with me. Is she still down there? I could go talk to her and explain why I’m here.” He was about to head towards the door but she immediately stopped him.


"Well actually, she acted more like she was expecting you."


"She was?" Spike told her doubtfully.


"And this surprised you how? Like you're not aware how much my mom adores you."

Spike smiled. Among their parents, Buffy’s mom was the only one who’s not objective to his routine of staying over at Buffy's room. The two of them shared a special bond that goes beyond a mother and son relationship. She trusts him and he looks up to her. Ever since his own mom died, whenever possible, Joyce tried to care for him as if she were her own child. And for that Spike would always be grateful to her.


"The feeling is mutual, pet. In fact she's the only mom I've ever known since..." He struggled with the words. " Well you know what I mean."


"Yes I do." She told him softly, giving him a light pat on his back to comfort him. Ever since his mom died more than six years ago, Spike still had not been able to talk about Jenny the way he should. The fact alone that up to this moment, Spike still blames himself for Jenny’s death worries her to no end. Oh how she desperately wants to help him heal. But how could she? When Spike would not even trust her enough to know that certain part of his life?


Spike looked at his watch. " I should be getting home so I could leave you more time with your beauty sleep, pet. “ He stood up without looking at her.


"Spike, can I ask you to do something for me?"


He turned. "Anything, luv."


"Can...Can you stay with me tonight?" She asked coyly.


Spike blinked, not really expecting for her to ask that from him. "Are you sure? You don't think
Riley would mind?"


She nodded. "Just for tonight. Will you hold me, William?"



Spike looked at her warily before he removed his shirt and tentatively took his usual position behind her. It has been so damn long since they've been this close.


Buffy had already seen him bare-chested so many times, but that night, when he took of his shirt in front of her, she could not help but admire his well defined torso. Her best friend indeed is a real fine catch. Not only is he caring and funny, he also has a sex appeal that runs 24 hours a day. Drusilla is one lucky gal. Always been lucky.


When Spike’s arms came around her, her heart suddenly began to beat faster. She closed her eyes in confusion. Riley is her boyfriend and her fiancé', she told herself. She needs to focus on the man that she’s about to marry and stop thinking about the guy who’s head over heels in love with another girl.


She turned to face him. " Spike, are you still upset about my engagement to Riley?"


Spike mistook the sadness in her eyes and silently told himself that he was the cause of that. Buffy wanted him to be happy for her. To accept her future with Riley and still he would not give it to her.


"Buffy...if it would mean so much to you to have my blessing ....then it's all yours, pet."


Buffy stared at him in amazement " Really?


"Really." For you, I'll do anything.


Buffy sighed and laid her head against his chest. " Thank you….”


And that’s how she ended up sleeping.


Long after Buffy had succumbed into a deep slumber, Spike still lay awake, feeling his heart break into a million pieces as he continued to hold her tightly against him.



A/N : (Ducks for cover) Guys! Before you do anything drastic, let me explain first. I already knew that when I started out this story that it's going to take a while before the two would realize what's been standing right in front of their noses. There's reason why Spike is holding back and this will be revealed to you very soon. And there is still the question of Riley and Dru.

Let me tell you this much though, even if Spike hasn't told Buffy about his true feelings, that does not necessarily mean it would stop me from writing a little naughty/smut scene every now and then for our favorite couple, right? Tell you what, I promise to post the next chapter right away as soon as I get at least 10 reviews. If not, I’ll just post it the day after.





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