It was raining hard as she started to walk her way to the Bronze, but she didn’t care. That day, the sky felt that it was time to let out what it’s been keeping inside and she couldn’t agree more. She was hurting and all her mind could ever think about was the time when Spike went to her room on her 17th birthday.
She remembered coming home with him from the karaoke party that her friend threw for her. Spike had taken her in his arms, but didn’t stay for the night like he used to. There was something the way that he held her that felt different…like he was scared. He’d been like that from the day she had the accident, acting a little paranoid, always checking-up on her and staying as long as he could in the hospital.
Spike had cuddled with her; her head laid comfortably upon his chest while he lazily combed her with his fingers. It was one of those moments that Buffy wished time would stop so could she stay with him like that forever.
Buffy had waited, but the night ended without a single rose in sight.
That night, she felt her heart broke into a million pieces just as he’d given her a kiss on her forehead to signal his goodbye.
The ringing sound of her cell phone broke her away from her sad thoughts. When she saw from the caller ID that it wasn’t Spike, she didn’t hesitate to answer it. “Willow?”
“Buffy, what happened. I spoke with Spike and he’s been worried sick about you.”
“He’s still at my house?”
“I know. He told me what happened.”
There was silence at the end of Buffy’s line.
“Buffy?”
“I hate him, Wills.”
“No, you don’t. You’re just saying that because of the anger you’re feeling right now.”
Buffy held a sob.” How could I not be angry with him? He’s acting like a total jerk! He- ”
“Reminds you of your dad?”
Buffy felt anger rise in her throat. “He does… “
**************
At the Bronze,
“Let’s go ladies, “Drusilla drawled impatiently as she watched the dance floor begin to pack with horny teens groping and grinding at each other. She’d been desperately dying for a shag and Lindsey, her boy toy for the past few days, is out of town. What she would give to have Spike writhing and moaning at her bedpost by now. “This scene is beginning to bore me.”
“Can’t we stay a wee bit longer?” Harmony protested. “I want to see Teddy G. perform.”
Dru rolled her eyes. “I’m not into his kind of music, Harm.”
“How about we catch up with you later coz’ I want to stay too.” Cordy added.
The crazy brunette groaned in frustration. “Grrr, why do I even bother?” With that, she stood up and left.
Fuming silently, she pushed and snarled at anyone who blocked her way. She was a few feet away from finally reaching the door when she spotted Willow and her friends. With a calculated approach to curiosity, her eyebrow cocked when she caught a few words from the red head's conversation on her cell phone.
********************
“Oh Buffy….”
“Spike told me he loved me. But what I couldn’t get was why he did not leave me that rose four years ago?”
“Buffy, sweetie. You have to forget about what happened in the past. What matters is that he wants to be with you.”
“But he didn’t fight for-“
“Will you stop it and listen to yourself! You’re throwing away the chance to be with the guy that you truly love just because of that knight-in-shinning-armor crap!”
Taken aback, Buffy looked at her phone in disbelief. She wasn’t used to hearing Willow in an angry state. “God, Willow! Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?”
“All I’m saying is that everybody deserves a second chance. For all we know, Spike has a pretty good reason why he didn’t do what he was supposed to do three years ago.” Willow sighed, hoping that she could get through her friend’s thick mindedness before she does something she’ll regret forever. “I know you, Buffy. I know you long enough to know that whenever you get hurt, especially by people you care about, you try to carry it with you forever. And it tends to cloud your judgment.”
“Willow, I’m not-“
“I don’t expect you to just turn around because I told you to. I just…I feel you owe a little bit to yourself to think past your pain and look at the big picture. Can you do that for me, sweetie?”
***********]
Dru watched the red head turn off her cell phone. So Buffy haven’t told Spike about the letter?...and Spike is all alone in Sunshine’s house, she mused, smiling wickedly to herself as she made her way out of the Bronze. Look’s like mummy’s not gonna be so lonely tonight after all.
“Well?” Xander asked, trying gauge Willow’s reaction.
“I think I did everything I can do.” Willow answered casually.
Anya shook her head in disappointment. “But what?”
“I guess, It’s all up to her now.”
The three of them just stared at each other. They remained silent as they began to listen to Teddy Gieger’s performance on stage.
Wandering the streets, in a world underneath it all
Nothing seems to be, nothing tastes as sweet
As what I can't have
Like you and the way that you're twisting your hair
round your finger
Tonight I'm not afraid to tell you
What I feel about you.
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
and cannon ball into the water
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
For you I will
For you I will
*******************
(Music blends into another scene- at Buffy’s house)
Forgive me if I stutter
From all of the clutter in my head
Cuz I could fall asleep in those eyes
Like a water bed
Do I seem familiar, i've crossed you in hallways
a thousand times, no more camouflage
I want to be exposed, and not be afraid to fall.
Spike sat on the floor with his back to the door. His eyes quickly wandered throughout the candles that had been lit for the romantic evening that never happened.
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
And cannon ball into the water
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
For you I will
You always want what you can't have
But I've got to try
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
For you I will
For you I will
For you I will
Suddenly, he heard the doorbell. His face lit up. Buffy. Quickly, he stood to open it. “Buf- Oh it’s you.”
“I’m sorry if I disturbed you, Spike.” Andrew apologized. “It’s just that I forgot my PDA somewhere in the dining room.”
Spike couldn’t hide the disappointment in his eyes as he felt his world start to crumble around him. She’s not going to come back, he thought painfully.
“Did I say something wrong?”
“No. Come in, Andrew.” He said as he stepped aside, allowing the little blonde guy to come in and retrieve what he came for.
“I’ll be on my way…” Andrew told him. Taking several steps, the lad suddenly hesitated and faced him. “You know, I have an aunt who used to tell me that things are always darkest before the dawn.”
And with that he turned and left just as the heavy rain started to fall.
Spike closed the door and started to think about what Andrew said. “Well apparently his Aunt hasn’t met someone as stubborn as Buffy,” He muttered to himself, just as his eyes began to well up with tears.
Just then he heard the knock again. Spike shook his head in disbelief. The lad was just too forgetful for his age. Irritated, he opened the door once more. “What do you wa-”
The words got caught in his throat when he realized that it wasn’t Andrew. It was Buffy who he found standing on the other side of the door.
“Buffy?” He said, tilting his head to stare at her longingly. He hoped that she finally found it in her heart to forgive him.
“Spike…” She started. Her entire body was shivering and her clothes were soaked to the skin from the rain. “I came back to get something I need.”
The light in his eyes faded just as quickly as it came. He stood aside and let her in, resisting the urge to remove his shirt and put it around her trembling form.
“Oh…no problem. I’ll just finish putting out the candles.” He said, looking away. “I know that this is your house, luv, but I meant what I said that I’m not gonna leave. Not this time. But if you want your space to think, I could sleep in the basement. I’m perfectly okay with-”
“Spike.” She interrupted.
“Yes?” He hesitantly turned to her, bracing himself for her usual stubborn reaction.
“Shut-up.” He heard her say just before she threw herself in his arms and smashed her lips with his.
TBC.
A/N: Aren’t we glad that Willow finally talked some sense into her? Please, let me know how this chapter went. Thanks for all the lovely reviews on my last update. Coming up next is a very Spuffy chapter.
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Author's Chapter Notes:
Thanks to my beta, maricel for a job well done :-)