A/N: Sorry, know it’s been a long time, but I had finals this week and last so I’ve been a bit busy. But now I’ve got a two and half week break before fall semester starts, and I’m all kinds of excited to finish this mother. So here’s hoping I can do it. Thanks so much for all the reviews, so please continue and enjoy!

-Bob Dylan, “Love Minus Zero/No Limit”

Buffy and Spike drove back to the house to gather some things Spike insisted they would need for his surprise. He asked her to wait in the car while he gathered everything. Buffy was getting more and more curious about his plans, particularly on the heels of their session with Fred. She still didn't know what he needed to speak with her about, but she had a feeling it was something to do with their abbreviated encounter the previous night.

Spike slammed the trunk of the car and knocked Buffy from her musings. He smiled broadly as he got into the car and raised her hand to his lips, kissing it softly before starting the car and backing out of the driveway.

"Ready to tell me where we're going?"

Spike grinned and then turned back to the road. "Wouldn't be a surprise then, would it, pet?"

"What if I don't like surprises?"

"You just told me you did."

"Whatever," she said, mock-petulantly unable to hold in the slight smile.

He grinned wider and reached for her hand again, this time not letting it go. The fact that he could make her heart beat a little faster just by taking her hand was a little disconcerting to her. She didn't know if it was because they'd touched so little of each other for so long, or because his mere presence always excited her. She'd never felt this strongly for anyone.

She squeezed his hand and settled back into her chair for the ride.

***

When they arrived at their destination, Spike asked her to wait for him while he took everything and set it up for them. Minutes later he was back, and she closed her eyes at his request while he lead her over the hill blocking the car's view of where he was taking her.

Finally, he moved behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her close to him.

"Open your eyes, luv," he whispered in her ear.

Buffy opened her eyes slowly. "Oh, Spike."

"You like it, then?"

She pulled his arms tighter around her and breathed in the scent of the trees and clean, fresh air. "It's beautiful, where are we?"

"Dad owns quite a bit of land up here, this is part of it."

"The whole lake?!"

Spike chuckled and looked around. The lake wasn't huge, but it was quite beautiful, the water was clear and clean, the area surrounding it was covered in dense forest. They were on the only part of the shore that could facilitate actual relaxing on a blanket with a picnic, which is what it seemed Spike had planned.

"He inherited a lot of money, bought a lot of land with it all over the place. He really loves it up here."

Buffy turned in his arms and kissed the corner of his mouth quickly. "I love it here too."

He smiled down at her and wondered for the millionth time how he'd gotten so lucky to have found her. They were silent, staring at each other, and he could feel her trying to figure out what was still bothering him, but he wasn't quite ready to let her know.

He looked away and she stepped back slightly, looking to the side.

Spike cursed himself for ruining the moment and tried for a smile. "Hungry, pet?"

She nodded and smiled back at him, though this time he could tell she was a little upset by his rejection of her. He didn't know a way to make it up to her, so he just moved to help her sit and started to unload the basket.

"What are you in the mood for? Got fruit, cheese, bread, some whipped cream..." He smiled up at her and some of the tension melted away.

She reached into the basket herself and found a bottle of wine. He looked up at her a little guiltily. "I thought... maybe... wouldn't drink much, y'know, just-"

"Spike, it's ok. We're here together, I think you can control yourself."

He knew she was right, there wasn't a chance of him getting drunk with Buffy right there with him, open and ready and willing for anything he wanted to give her, but he couldn't help but feel a little guilty about it.

He nodded and brought out the glasses, pouring a small amount for the both of them and handing one to her.

"Come sit with me."

Spike realized he'd been kneeling on the grass with the basket between them, with no intention of getting any closer to her.

He moved over to her on his knees and she pushed him to sit and then moved between his legs, wrapping his arms back around her. He sighed into her hair and kissed her temple lightly.

"What should we toast to?"

Buffy drew designs on his hand covering her stomach. "The future? Cliche, but apt?"

He smiled against her and nodded. They clinked their glasses and Spike took a long swallow. Suddenly he wasn't sure what he should be doing. They should have eaten first, didn't people drink wine and have toasts when they were getting ready for the night to get good?

But he wasn't sure it would get good, if he could get it to get good. He'd looked like a complete ponce since before she'd come to help him here, and now, if he couldn't even give her the one thing he was good for, what was the bloody point?

Buffy felt him tense behind her the longer they sat together, the more she could feel him retreating into himself. She tried stroking his arms and knees, but he didn't respond. Finally, she got an idea.

"Spike?"

"Yes, luv?"

"You own this place, right? So no one comes here except you?"

"Yeah," he said warily, not sure about where she was taking this.

"Want to be a little naughty?"

"Buffy..."

She stood and turned to look at him with a mischievous twinkle in her eyes. “I want to go swimming.”

Spike sat up straight and looked hard at her. “No swimsuits, pet.”

Her smile got wider and he swallowed hard. “That’s half the fun.”

She started to lift her shirt and he stood hastily. “Buffy, wait, it’s five in the bloody afternoon, pretty light out still.”

She finished taking her shirt off and smiled when he gulped at the sight of her lace covered breasts. “No one comes here, you said so, it could be noon and we’d be ok.”

Spike looked around, desperate for an excuse. He snapped his finger and tried for an apologetic face. “Wait, it’s pretty damn cold in there, baby, don’t want you to get sick. Guess we’ve go to go back.”

She shook her head and pulled her pants down her legs along with her panties and began to unhook her bra. “Guess you’ll have to keep me warm then.”

Before he could grab her she skipped off down to the shore and waded in. He clenched and unclenched his fists, weighing his options. She was bloody gorgeous in the sun, all wet, her nipples hard due to the cold, little drops of water making delicious paths down her-

“Well hello, decide to come out of hiding now do you?” He sighed, staring down at his pants which were becoming tighter and tighter the more he thought of Buffy prancing about near the lake.

He stripped off his shirt and toed off his boots before beginning to run after her, still tugging his pants off. He dove into the water after her and immediately wished he hadn’t.

“Oh holy bloody fuck, that’s cold!”

Buffy smiled and swam up to him, wrapping her arms around his neck. “I’m glad you decided to join me.”

He smiled his first genuine one since coming here. “Never doubted it, did you, luv? Know I’d go to the ends of the earth for you.”

She rested her forehead against his and rubbed their noses together. “Yeah...”

Their lips met, tentative at first, just tasting each other again, getting reacquainted with the feel of each other’s lips. She sighed into the kiss and her tongue darted out to lick his lips. Spike opened his mouth and let his tongue come out to play with hers.

They broke the kiss when air became an issue and Spike smiled against her cheek. “This is good, yeah?”

Buffy nodded and nibbled on his ear lightly. Spike let out a small sound, closer to a whimper than a moan and Buffy let her legs float up to wrap around his waist.

“Is this ok?”

Spike trembled against her and pressed his now very hard cock between her thighs. “More than ok, luv.”

Buffy moaned into his neck at the feel of him against her highly sensitive flesh. “Spike...”

He silenced her with a kiss and pressed himself harder against her. His hands moved down to grip her ass and pull her closer. She let her hands wander up his chest and she felt his cock jump against her when she brushed his nipples and his knees suddenly felt very weak.

The more Buffy touched him, the more of her skin he covered in kisses and caressed, the weaker his legs became. When they almost gave out he realized it wasn’t so much about his arousal as his still weakened body.

He moved his lips from her skin and pulled back a little bit.

Buffy looked up at him, confused and worried and he kissed her softly to reassure her. “Maybe we should move this back onto shore.” Her brow furrowed further and before he could explain, his left leg failed him.

They both sputtered as they broke the surface of the water again and she looked at him oddly before realization suddenly dawned on her.

“Oh, Spike! Baby, I’m so sorry, I can’t believe I didn’t think of it. You’re still getting better and I try to jump you in the most painful way possible.”

He shook his head and smiled before pulling her against him. “Feel like it was all that painful?”

She smiled and took his hand, leading him out of the water and onto the blanket. He settled in next to her and pulled the blanket up around them. They kissed leisurely under the blanket, their tongues engaged in a slow dance, neither felt the need to rush things.

Spike especially wanted this time to be perfect. They were starting all over, he’d been given the chance again, for no reason he could fathom, but he was more than willing to take it.

His hands squeezed and fondled her breasts before his mouth descended to take one hard nipple into his mouth. Buffy groaned above him, threading her fingers through his hair and holding him to her.

“Oh, god Spike!”

He made his way back up her body and dipped a hand between her legs to feel if she was ready for him.

“Been so long, Buffy, want to be inside you.”

She kissed him hard and opened her legs, wrapping them around his waist. He positioned himself at her entrance and locked his eyes with hers before sliding in slowly.

“Yess...”

Buffy couldn’t keep looking into his eyes, it was too intense. She threw her head back and cried out as he hit the sweet spot inside her. “Spike, oh yes!”

He couldn’t help himself, he thrust inside her with abandon, her heat burning him from the inside out, he’d never felt anything as magnificent as her. Her hands found their way down his back, clutching his ass and pushing him harder into her. He groaned and felt his balls begin to tighten.

“Fuck, Buffy, I’m sorry, I can’t.... oh god, Buffy!”

He came hard, spurting inside her for what seemed like forever. The feel of his hot seed filling her womb set her off and she cried out for him as her body arched off the ground, her breasts pressing against his sweat slicked chest.

They collapsed together onto the blanket, breathing hard. Spike covered her neck and chest in sloppy kisses, all the while whispering of his love to her.

Buffy managed to lift a limp hand up to his head and stroke his hair. “That was-”

“- bloody amazing?”

She smiled goofily down at him, “yeah.”

Spike moved up her body and she rested her head on his chest while he wrapped a strand of hair around his finger and kissed the top of her head. “I’m sorry about last night, Buffy, it should have been then.”

She propped herself up on her elbows and looked down at him. “What happened?”

He rubbed a hand over his brow and shrugged. “I don’t even know. I just couldn’t.”

She was about to comment that he wasn’t answering her question, but then she realized what he meant. “Oh. What... oh. And you don’t know-”

“It wasn’t you, Buffy.”

She blushed slightly and looked away. “Is that what you asked Fred about?”

Spike sat up and touched her cheek. “Buffy, look at me.”

She avoided his eyes for a moment but finally looked up.

“I didn’t say anything to you because I was mortified. I don’t know why it happened. Fred told me it could have been a number of things, but none of them were about you. Due to the fact I didn’t need much coaxing just now, I’m thinking it was something to do with the drugs. Just my body being confused, unable to understand pleasure. Never you, Buffy, even when I couldn’t.. y’know, I still felt turned on everywhere else. You make me so hot, make me feel so good. Never think I don’t desire you every single second.”

Buffy felt ridiculous for letting him know she was... what, hurt? insulted? about it. She knew it wasn’t about her, he was having all the right responses from the waist up, but she wanted to be able to get to him no matter what, even in spite of his body.

Spike pulled her against him and kissed her neck. “Buffy, I love you.”

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath before turning to face him. “I know, I love you too.”

He pulled her back down so that they could lay together, their legs entwined, arms around each other. He loved being this close to her again, he never wanted to leave this place.

“I kept writing.. even during... and I think I’ve got something.”

“Got something? Like a novel or what?”

He shrugged. “Don’t know, just know I’ve got a lot of stuff, and I think it’s pretty good. If we ever get back to California I was going to talk to Wes about it. Though I imagine he’s right pissed with me.”

“You’re his favorite student, he’ll understand what happened.”

Spike just shrugged and she understood that he didn’t really want to talk about it anymore. They lay together, touching and kissing lightly for a while until Buffy felt his cock pressing hard into her thigh. She smiled and sat up, straddling his thighs.

She trailed her fingers from his cheeks to his thighs and drew patterns around the area he needed her touch the most, making him squirm. His cock was long and hard, pearly fluid leaking slowly from the tip and dripping onto his stomach.

“See how hard you make me, luv?” he asked, his hands squeezing her thighs, where he held on for dear life.

She smiled until she really got clear sight of him for the first time since everything began here. He was skinny before, but this was different.

Spike noticed the change and tilted his head. “What is it, Buffy?”

When she met his eyes, he saw tears there. “Buffy?”

“Oh, Spike...”

She traced the tiny scars she could see on his chest and arms and finally moved to cup his face. “I’m so glad you’re better.”

He wasn’t sure what brought this on, but he couldn’t stand to see her cry for him. He sat up and pulled her to him. “Shh... ‘s’alright, luv. I’m alright.”

She sniffled against him for a moment, but the sound of his voice, and the feel of his too skinny and scarred body brought everything she’d been bottling up for the past month out. She sobbed against his shoulder hard, clutching him to her almost painfully. “I love you so much, I’m so happy you’re back...”

“Shh.. Love you too, baby, ‘s okay...”

She stayed crying against him for a while, before she reached between them and stroked him back to hardness. He wasn’t exactly sure what to think, her moods were so mercurial right now. When she sank down onto him and held him tight, rocking slowly, he thought he understood. This was to reassure her that he was really here.

He buried his face in her neck and kissed her softly. “I’ll never leave you again, Buffy, I swear it. Love you so much.”

Her pace picked up and soon they were crying out together. He held her to him as they came down and stroked her hair.

“Spike?”

“Yes, luv?”

“I want to go home.”

He pulled back and looked at her, trying to decide what she meant. He nodded and kissed her softly.

“Let’s go pack.”