“You’ll have to forgive him. He can go on and on about 18th century literature, and even tell you all you didn’t want to know about the Revolutionary War, the Civil War, World War I and II, but simple things escape him. Like, well, you,’ Buffy told Superman, smiling cheekily. “I’m Buffy Summers, how can I help you?” Hello, tall, dark and so infinitely gorgeous.
“I know who the bloody hell Superman is, you annoying chit, but hell, didn’t expect to see him here. Figured we’d got ourselves some kind of loon. That spandex?” Spike asked pointing to Superman’s costume.
“Partly, yes,” Superman replied, furrowing his brow. “Who are you?”
“Spike or, as I have been called, William the Bloody.”
Buffy snorted, “He wishes.”
Superman came forward, his cape waving in the wind. He sniffed at Spike who took a step back, disgust written on his face. “Are you a vampire?” Superman asked.
“Well, mark one up for the man in tights,” Spike said, nudging the Slayer.
Buffy rolled her eyes. “Would you stop insulting him? God, he’s Superman. Could you have some respect? Just because you don’t go for – how does it go? – Truth—“
“Justice,” Superman supplied.
“And the American Way,” Spike finished. “Yeah, I know all that rot, pet. The whole bloody tune.”
“Excuse him. Again.” Buffy said, stepping in front of Spike. “How do you know who I am? I mean . . Do you know who I am?”
“You’re the Vampire Slayer,” Superman said, nodding.
Buffy blushed, “Wow. I mean, Superman has heard of me. Superman. Superman has heard of me—“
“You’ll have to forgive her now. She’s so devoted to her sacred duty that she’s become socially inept and mildly mentally challenged,” Spike informed Superman.
“How is it that a vampire and a Slayer are friends? Or. . . lovers?” Superman inquired.
“Oh, definitely not lovers,” Buffy jumped in, ignoring the hurt on Spike’s face at her denial. Well, we aren’t, she thought. “And well, a friend…depends on the day.”
Superman chuckled, “I see. Do you have a soul?”
Spike shook his head. “Even better. A chip.”
“A chip?”
“In my cranium. Thanks to the bloody government and their hair brained ideas about keeping the demon community under control. Bunch of fuckin’ amateurs –“
“Here we go,” Buffy sighed.
“Well, you were part of them for a bit and look what almost happened to you,” Spike said pointedly.
“Yeah, and I also recall that you trusted them enough once to have one of their doctor’s try and get the stupid chip out.”
“Almost had it out until Captain Cardboard came along—“
“I was with him jackass. Didja think I was gonna let you get away with that?”
Spike opened his mouth to retort, but Superman cut him off. “I’m sorry, but are you sure you’re not lovers?”
Both heads whipped to Superman and Buffy retorted to that with an adamant “No”, and Spike just smirked. “You might not be a bad bloke after all.”
“So let me get this straight,” Buffy began an hour later as she, Spike and Superman were headed on their way to the other cemetery across town. “Some vamp attacked Lois Lane outside The Daily Planet.”
“Right,” Superman said nodding.
“And it was daytime,” Spike affirmed.
“Right.”
“So, who staked him?” Buffy asked.
“Clark Kent, one of the uh, reporters,” Superman said, rubbing the back of his neck.
Buffy and Spike nodded in unison, both thoughtful.
“Why her?” Buffy asked.
“I believe it has to do with Lex Luthor.”
“How do you figure?”
“The vampire was wearing one of Luthor’s designer suits. His initials were monogrammed right on the suit.”
“Wait, the class has a question,” Spike interrupted. “How did you know all this if you weren’t there?”
“From Clark,” Superman told him. “He, uh, he picked up on it.”
“I see,” Spike said warily.
“So, Luthor sent some vampire out to get Lois?” Buffy asked.
“I believe so.”
“But why?”
“She was the one who tipped me off to where she was when Luthor kidnapped her and Jason—“
“Jason?”
“Her son.”
“Okay, sorry, continue. She tipped off you to that whole plan Luthor had to wipe out half of North America?”
“Right,” Superman said nodding.
“So, he wanted revenge, and sent a vamp to take care of Miss Lane. But in the day. So bizarre. And you don’t know where he is?”
“I know he’s off the island he was on with Kitty.”
“Kitty?”
“Girlfriend.”
“And you came here, why?”
“I hear things, Miss Summers. I get around. I’ve heard of the Slayer, and then I decided it was time to look her up.”
Buffy stopped. “You want to team up?”
Superman nodded, “If I could, yes.”
Buffy smiled up at him dazzlingly. “I’d love to! It’s not everyday a celebrity like you comes to town.”
“I recall you having the same bloody reaction when Drac was in town,” Spike drawled.
“Shut up,” Buffy snapped at him.
“I don’t wish to make my presence well-known,” Superman said hesitantly. “I realize that some attraction will be drawn, but I don’t wish to draw an audience. You understand?”
“Good luck with that,” Spike muttered.
“I completely understand. We’ll try to keep it on the down low as much as possible,” Buffy assured him. “As long as you make me a promise.”
“And that is?”
“My identity is also a secret. I’m Buffy Summers, student and daughter extraordinaire during the day, but at night I’m the Slayer and it’s not safe for too many people to be aware of what I do.”
“Ah yes. I have read that the Slayer is a guarded secret. No friends, sheltered life –“
“Not to mention a short life.”
“Hey,” Spike jumped in, “We’ll have no talk of that now.”
Buffy tossed him a small, grateful smile over her shoulder.
“Will you be working with us as well, Spike?” Superman asked.
Spike moved forward. “Yes, I will mate.”
“You don’t feel the desire to instead team up with Luthor?”
Spike looked sidelong at Buffy. “No. Where the girl goes, I go.”
Buffy looked away and Superman smiled. “Sounds like we have a deal then. Where shall we start?”