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Chapter 7

“Okay, you care to tell me what that was all about?”

Buffy shrugged when they got back to her room. “It was nothing. I just didn’t know he would be here.”

Spike raised his eyebrows. “Well, he is your sister’s boyfriend.”

She rolled her eyes. “Please, he’s not her boyfriend. He goes to UC Sunnydale and they only see each other on some weekends to practically make out, but that’s about it. They’re not really dating. Cordy says she’s okay with that little arrangement, but I can tell she wants more with him. He’s just not really a one girl kinda guy.”

“All right, but what was with your reaction to him? I don’t know you all that well, but I’ve never seen you look terrified before. That Parker bloke slams you into a locker and you hardly even flinch, but there was something in your eyes that showed you were scared of Angel.”

She crossed her arms over her chest. “I wasn’t scared. I just don’t really like him. I know how to handle Parker. He’s hardly anyone to worry about.”

Spike knew there was more to it than that, but he didn’t comment anymore about the subject. “Right, I’ll let you get back to your studying then,” he told her, then left the room.


* * * * *


Spike was tossing and turning all night. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t manage to fall asleep. He sighed and threw the covers off of his body. He just lay there staring up at the ceiling, his mind wandering back to the conversation he had with Buffy earlier. There was something going on that she wasn’t telling him. He was more determined than ever to find out what it was. He didn’t even know why he cared, but there was just something different about her.

He was ripped from his thoughts at the sound of a loud scream. He instantly knew it was Buffy and jumped out of bed, making his way towards her bedroom. He entered the room to see that she was thrashing in bed.

Faith and Dawn were trying to calm her, but she wouldn’t respond to them.

Spike made his way over to her side and grabbed her flailing arms. “Buffy, wake up! You’re just having a bad dream!”

“No!” she yelled, her eyes still shut tight.

Spike took a risk and pulled her into his arms. He felt her start to awaken and calm down a little.

Buffy then burst into tears and clinged to him.

He ran his fingers down her back to sooth her. “It’s okay, it was only a dream.”

Joyce came into the room and immediately went to Buffy’s side.

Spike handed the frightened girl over to her mother, even though he didn’t want to let her go. He then noticed that everyone else was awake and now in the room to see what the commotion was all about.

Buffy was crying in Joyce’s shoulder, the older woman trying to comfort her daughter as best she could.

Spike could vaguely hear Buffy whispering something. He leaned closer to get a better listen. His heart felt like breaking at her words.

“I want Daddy,” she said repeatedly.

Joyce started to rock Buffy back and forth. “I know you do, baby. It’s going to be okay.”

Giles then ushered everyone else out of the room to give mother and daughter some privacy.

It pained Spike to have to leave her side, but he just followed after everyone else.


* * * * *


They were all sitting downstairs lost in thought. No one knew what to say.

Cordelia was the first one to speak up. “Buffy used to be excited about everything. She hardly ever got upset. She wanted to be a cheerleader like me because we always had such good spirit. She thought it looked like fun, but a part of her died along with our dad. It’s like she just gave up on everything. She used to always get nightmares after his death, but then they started to go away. She hasn’t had one in about five months, until now.”

Giles cleared his throat. “Yes, do you know what could have triggered it?”

She shook her head and didn’t say anything else about it.

Dawn spoke after a moment of silence. “I saw her guitar out of the closet. I think she was playing again. She hasn’t done that since Daddy…” Her voice trailed off. She took a deep breath before continuing. “I…I think maybe it brought back some memories.”

Joyce suddenly made her way downstairs.

They all turned their attention on her now.

“Buffy finally managed to go back to sleep. I think we should all do the same.”

They agreed and headed back upstairs.

Joyce reached her husband’s side and grasped his hand. “Oh, Rupert. I don’t know what could have happened. I have never seen Buffy like that before. I thought she was getting better.”

Giles put his arm around the distraught woman and helped her up the stairs. “I’m sure she’ll be fine, Joyce. We just need to give her time.”

Joyce agreed and let him take the lead. She really hoped her daughter would be okay.


* * * * *


Tara entered Buffy’s room the next day to find her sitting up in bed. It was about time that she had a talk with her sister.

“How are you doing?” she asked to make conversation.

Buffy only shrugged. “I’m fine; it wasn’t really a big deal. I didn’t mean to freak everyone out.”

Tara nodded and sat down on the edge of Buffy’s bed. “Do you want to talk about it?”

She shook her head. “It was just a dream. I don’t even really remember it.”

Tara wasn’t convinced. “I think you would remember a dream that had you reacting like that. I know Angel was over here yesterday. Did it have something to do with him?”

Buffy looked away. “It was just a dream,” she mumbled.

Tara took her younger sister’s hand in hers and gave it a squeeze. “Buffy, you have to tell them. You’ve kept this inside for over a year now. It’s about time they knew the truth.”

Buffy glanced back up at her, quickly shaking her head. “I can’t tell them. They wouldn’t understand. You’re the only one that knows, Tara. You can’t say anything.”

Tara let out a sigh. “I’ve been keeping this secret for too long, Buffy. I won’t say anything because it’s not my place to, but they have a right to know. If only seeing him again causes you to have nightmares, then there’s no telling what would happen next time.”

“I’ve been so good at staying away from him. I just have to keep it up for a little while longer. Cordy said he was going away to New York for the summer. He might not even come back. I’ll be okay.”

Tara wouldn’t believe that, but she decided to let it go. She knew talking about it would only upset Buffy more, but she wasn’t going to give up. Angel hurt her sister and he was going to get what was coming to him. She wasn’t about to let him hurt Cordelia, too.





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