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While she was waiting for the Scoobies to arrive, Buffy paced up and down the room. She glanced over to where Spike was sprawled on the sofa, one arm raised to cover his eyes, and suddenly felt awful. So frightened at Dawn’s narrow escape from Glory’s minions, she’d yelled at him for having self pity. But who wouldn’t have felt sorry for themselves having lost their sight? Some of the defensive barrier she had built around her heart melted.

“Um, any improvement?” She asked.

Spike was so deep in thought, that he hardly heard her. Why, oh why had he come to sodding Sunnyhell anyway? If he hadn’t *met* the bleedin’ slayer, he wouldn’t be in this mess and he wouldn’t have killed his dark princess. Buffy was only going to tolerate him at best and at worst, loathe him. Spike could feel terror clawing at the back of his mind, would this blindness be permanent? His eyes felt as though they were filled with hot sand. How the hell was he going to survive in this world? He became aware that Buffy had taken a seat next to him and was holding his wrist.

“What?” He asked vaguely.

“Is there any improvement, you know, with your eyes?”

He lowered his arm and cautiously forced his eyes open. “Can’t see a bloody thing.”

“I’m sorry Spike.” Buffy said simply, stroking her thumb up and down his wrist, trying to comfort him.

He turned his head slowly in her direction and gaped sightlessly at her. “Bloody hell, someone’s replaced the Slayer while I wasn’t looking.”

“Yeah, I know. Not good at the tea and sympathy thing, but you got hurt trying to protect Dawn – that makes a full set of Summers girls you’ve saved, or tried to save, now. I’m grateful, really I am.” She looked at his normally bright blue eyes, which were now swollen and blood-shot and, again, felt herself warming to him.

For once, Spike was speechless. His mouth opened and closed a couple of times and he took a breath but then had to sigh it out, when he couldn’t get his brain in gear.

He heard the smile in Buffy’s voice as she said, “Mmm, I’ll have to thank you again – it seems the only sure way to get you to shut up for any length of time.”

Still without coherent thought, Spike was almost grateful to hear a knock on the front door.

“I’d better bugger off then.” He got to his feet, only to be pushed back down again.

“You’re going nowhere mister. They’ll want to hear what happened.”

“Not from me they won’t.” He said stubbornly.

“Anyway,” she said, not listening to him, “we’ll need your insight.”

He was back to gaping again. This woman would never cease to amaze and surprise him. Was she actually inviting him to one of her exclusive Scoobie meetings? Did he want to be involved? Bloody right he did – if it meant that he’d be sitting next to her and listening to her singing his praises. Well, perhaps not exactly singing, probably more like muttering…. He realised that there were other people in the room now – the Watcher, Red and Harris by their scent – wait, yes also Red’s girlfriend, watsername. He tried to concentrate, which was difficult because when the Slayer sat back down next to him, she grasped his wrist again and her thumb was stroking him comfortingly. She seemed to realise this at the same time, because her fingers were withdrawn and he felt a chill where her warmth had been.

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“So, how does Glory know the key is a person?” Giles asked.

“Dunno Watcher, all I know is that they thought it was me.” Spike said sullenly, he’d started to lose his temper after the third time of telling them his story and now was having trouble keeping a lid on his rage and fear.

“So you told them it was Dawn.” Xander sneered.

“No.” Spike said with exaggerated patience. “I told them it wasn’t me and then they thought it might be Dawn. But then I told them it *was* me.”

“We only have his word about what happened. Why don’t we go get Dawn and ask her?” Xander appealed to them.

“You leave the Bit alone, you wanker!” Spike snarled, getting to his feet.

“Or what? You’ll shake your white stick at me?” Xander realised that the vampire was growling low in his chest, and he felt a wash of fear. Everyone was looking at him strangely. “What? Come on people, have you forgotten what he is? We’ll never get the truth out of him.”

“I think we all know what he is Xander. He’s the one who saved my life, my mother’s life and got blinded trying to save my sister.” Buffy’s voice gave him a chill down his spine and, if he was honest, Xander was glad to have a reason to back down. Spike, even in this state, was looking worryingly savage.

Giles’ voice was calm, “I think we could all do with a break. There isn’t much more we can do tonight. I’ll go and research my books to see if there is any mention of a demon who immolates his victims. I suggest everyone else gets some rest and we’ll meet up again tomorrow.”

There was a chorus of agreement and the tension in the room cleared a little. Spike sank back down – bloody hell he was up and down like a bleedin’ yo-yo.

When Xander finally left, Spike was feeling calmer.

“Ah, this might help.”

Spike felt something being put in his hand.

“What’s this, Watcher?”

“Eye drops. When Buffy told me what had happened, I remembered I still had these from when Willow’s spell went wrong.”

Spike blinked painfully, was that sympathy in the Watcher’s voice? Wonders would never cease.

Then it was Tara’s turn to surprise him.

“If you’d lie down, I’ll put them in for you if you like.” It was almost too much, the emotions he had been fighting all this time nearly spilled over. He was letting these humans get too close. But then, what choice did he have? He realised he was totally in their power, but also that he trusted them. *Trusted them? What was the world coming to*? He lay down obediently and felt the soothing fluid cool his burning eyes.

“Ta luv.”

“You’re welcome. I’ll put them on the table here.” She pulled his hand forward to show him where the bottle was.

He suddenly realised that this must be what it was like to have a friend and the ever-present lump in his throat threatened to choke him.

Giles and the two witches left shortly afterwards and Spike relaxed a little. All this interaction with the humans had exhausted him. He hated the fact that he couldn’t see their reactions, only judge them by the inflections in their voices.

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Buffy warmed some blood for him and, when he had finished hit, helped him to the basement door.

“’m all right Slayer, can find my own way.”

“Spike, don’t be so stubborn. Let me do this, it’ll make me feel better.” Buffy felt a bit ashamed of using his feelings for her to make him do as she wished, but it was all in a good cause.

He allowed her to help him down the stairs, without any more objections. After she had settled him down on to the bed, she hesitated. She wondered whether this would be a good time to ask him about the why and how he had saved her. His normally piercing blue eyes, that made her feel he could see right into her soul, were disabled and it was a freeing sensation.

“I’m sorry about what Xander said. He’s such an idiot at times, but he’s only trying to protect me.”

Spike was silent, where was this going?

“Spike, I know you have feelings for me and Dawn and mom, was that why you saved me?”

He sighed and leaned back against the wall. “So you admit that I can have feelings do you?”

“Okay, I deserved that. But everything that I’ve read and heard tells me that Vampires are unthinking, savage, killing machines. It wasn’t so long ago that you were trying your best to kill me.”

He gave his trademark smirk. “Oh, if I’d been serious, you’d’ve been dead long ago.” Then he sat forward leaning his arms across his legs. “Buffy, what I said in my crypt a couple of weeks ago is still true. I love you and I couldn’t let anything hurt you or yours. I told you that I’d kill Dru for you, I just didn’t think I’d have to.” He gave a painful chuckle.

Buffy looked at this creature that at best she should loathe and her heart melted. She bent down and kissed his forehead, hearing his gasp of surprise.

“I think I’ve said this before, but thank you. You have been a good friend to this family – I hope you’ll let us help you now. If you need anything, just shout.” And with that she left.

Spike was stunned. Had she called him her friend? Well, that was a beginning. A smile slowly spread across his face as he settled down to sleep.


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TBC





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