“I’m sorry,” she apologized. “I think it all just hit me.”
Getting up, Spike made his way around the table and awkwardly took her in his arms, hugging her. He patted her on the back, and then remembered reading that patting someone on the back was insincere. He stopped, resting his hand on her back. She was warm, her hair was damp and she felt so small and soft in his arms. She buried her face in his shoulder and cried.
When her cries had ceased somewhat, he pulled back and handed her the paper towel he gave her as a napkin. “Buffy, why don’t you wish to be put under police protection and stay with me?” he asked gently.
“I didn’t want him to get the best of me and drive me out of my home.”
“You witnessed a murder Buffy; you had to know he would come after you.”
“I did. I think I almost wanted him too.”
“Why?”
“So he’d be caught.”
“You set yourself up as a sitting duck?”
“Andrew was there.”
“Andrew,” Spike scoffed, “Is afraid of his own shadow.”
“Riley would come by often as well.”
That piqued Spike’s curiosity, “Did he now?”
She nodded. “He’s very kind.”
“Yeah, a real hero,” Spike muttered and Buffy giggled.
He looked up at her, surprised. “You giggled.”
She did it again, “I did.”
“That was nice to hear.”
“Thank you. You don’t like Riley?”
“No, I don’t. He’s a wuss.”
“And you don’t like Andrew.”
“No, he’s another wuss.”
“Is there anyone that can do the job correctly, Spike?”
He laughed then, her comment taking him by surprise. “No, don’t you know? Only I can do the job correctly.”
She smiled.
Something was nagging him now and he just had to get it out there. Sending her an apologetic look, he figured he’d just shoot straight from the hip. “Buffy, forgive me for asking, but aren’t you a suspect? I mean, you were the only one that saw it.”
“That is true. And my only alibi is that I spoke to Angel just before I left to meet Parker. I let them search my home and my computer for any evidence. I have nothing to hide, and they found nothing to incriminate me.”
“What are the suspects looking like?”
“Well, I know Parker had enemies – who doesn’t, right? – but I never would have thought their relationships were that bad.”
“Who were his enemies? Was it stupid guy stuff or something more serious?”
“A mix. There is a rival bar across town, The Bronze, and the owner was irate that Parker’s bar was very similar to his, and he was losing business because of The Realm. I’d seen the guy before get in Parker’s face about it.”
“And you told Sergeant Rayne this?”
“I told him all that I know.”
Silence, then, “You know, you don’t make sense.”
“How so?” she asked, cocking her head to the side.
“You made your brother a sitting duck as well.”
“I told him not to stay with me, but he insisted…I realize it’s a little contradictory, but life is full of contradictions, don’t you think?”
He smiled back, “That it is.” It was then that Spike became aware of how close they were, of her hands on his shoulders and how warm they felt through his white undershirt. He also became aware of the fact that he had the urge to kiss her. Just to see what she tasted like, and possibly to give her some comfort as well.
“Besides,” she continued, sliding her hands off him and turning toward the table, almost as if she’d read his mind. “I have what I need at my home. It really is locked up like a fortress.”
He put his hand under her chin and made her look at him. “So how’d they get in then, despite Andrew?”
“Somehow they figured out how to dismantle my alarm.”
“Forgive me again, but how are you able to hear that?”
“Don’t apologize, it’s a legitimate question. I have a pager with me at all times in the house, it alerts me if there is a fire by blinking a red light, and flashing a message telling me if there is a fire, or if there is an intruder. It’s waterproof. If I had been watching carefully, I would have seen that the pager completely failed on me, but I wasn’t paying attention. I was rinsing my hair. Plus they figured out how to make it so the security cameras I have in every room that switch from the garage, the front door and the back door, were shut off.”
“And if you’re sleeping? How are you aware of these things?”
“I keep the pager under my pillow and it vibrates.”
“Interesting. Did they hurt you?”
“No.”
“Did they come in the bathroom?”
“I saw them through the shower curtain; they were in my room, one through my drawers, two were trying to take my television, and one was coming for me.”
Spike’s whole body tensed. “What did you do?”
“I threw body wash and shampoo bottles at him, and then grabbed hair spray when I jumped out of the shower and sprayed him in the eyes, all the while screaming my head off.”
“My God, Buffy.”
“Andrew heard me then, and came up. By then they seemed to be frightened so they ran out of the house, but only after shooting Andrew.”
“Jesus, Buffy, they could have shot you.”
“They didn’t though. I can’t…” she shook her head, “I can’t dwell on that.”
“Christ, how can you not?”
She smiled at him. “You notice that when you say ‘Jesus’ in one sentence, you say ‘Christ’ in the next? It’s funny.”
No, he hadn’t noticed, and he didn’t care about that at the moment. “Buffy, I think you should stay with me.”
“They think the break in is connected.”
“You’re not listening—“ Callous statement, considering? He wasn’t sure.
“I don’t think it is. I think it was just a break in. If he was coming after me, they would have done me in, all of them, not just one.”
“Maybe they thought only one was needed to take care of you. Maybe they figured they might as well get what they could while they were there.”
She frowned, “Or they just heard the shower and saw me. Or had been watching the house for a while. Or decided to take their chance despite the cop.”
“You have a lot of theories on this.”
“I read a lot.”
“See any faces?”
“Nope, they wore a Mike Myers mask, you know, that creepy guy from the Halloween movies? Those movies always scared the crap out of me. That character is the ultimate boogey man. Now I’ll never again be able to watch them again.”
“Buffy, why don’t you just stay with me, here?”
“Can I think about it?”
“I know it’s not much—“
“It’s not that. Can I just think about it?”
“Sure.”
“It’s my home, Spike. I’ve had to overcome a lot of things in my life; I don’t wish to think I can’t overcome this.”
“You’re a hell of a woman, you know that?”
She smiled wistfully. “No, I’m not. I’m just me, doing the best that I can.”
“Well, it’s a hell of a lot than most could or would think to do.”
“That could change when you take me home. I could be a mess.”
“I thought you were going to think about staying here instead?” he said, cocking his head to the side, narrowing his eyes suspiciously and quirking his lips into a lopsided grin.
“Yes, I am,” she said resolutely, and turned back to her bowl of pasta, effectively ending the conversation.
She hadn’t wanted to put him out by making him sleep on the couch, but when he told her that he’d already changed the sheets for her, she acquiesced. Lying in the middle of his full sized bed, she called out to him as he made his way to the living room.
He turned and felt his breath hitch. Images of him in bed with her, with her under him infiltrated his mind and annoyed at his thoughts, he barked “What?”
She looked taken back by his outburst. She didn’t have to hear to read he was irritable and just snapped at her. “I – I wanted to thank you.”
“You’ve done enough thanking me tonight. Just stop all right?”
“All right.”
“Get some rest, we’ll figure it all out tomorrow.”
She nodded solemnly, and he felt like a git for yelling at her. He hadn’t meant to. It was just that she looked so fetching to him in his bed, looking all sweet, innocent and vulnerable. He had enough complications with Anya; he certainly didn’t need another one. Especially one that had burglars and a murderer after her.