When she didn’t respond, he sat up, rubbed his eyes, and looked around. Oh, right… He was here.
But where was she?
Then, the events of the night before began to rise to the surface, and Spike felt himself panicking. Drusilla hadn’t been there when he’d come back to bed either. What if she’d seen him with Buffy?
What had happened with Buffy the previous night was a mistake of epic proportions. Spike had no doubt about that, and he wished more than anything he could take it back—especially if it had cost him Drusilla. He knew most people probably didn’t understand what he saw in her, but William didn’t care about them. Drusilla was the only person in his life who had ever loved him. He couldn’t lose that. He couldn’t.
They needed to get out of this place. He needed to find Dru and, if it wasn’t too late, convince her to come home with him. They could go back to how things were, to how it was when he actually knew something close to happiness.
Spike hated himself for coming back here at all. This place—the home of the cruelest monster he’d ever known—was a curse. And one he’d brought back down upon himself.
He got out of bed and dressed quickly, desperate to find Drusilla and make it right again. If she had seen him with Buffy, then he’d have to beg her to forgive him. If she hadn’t, he still needed to get her back where things could be like normal again.
However, when he went downstairs, he didn’t find Drusilla.
He found Buffy.
She was in the parlor, seated on a sofa beside the picture window. Sunlight streamed in, dancing off the golden strands of her hair. Spike swallowed, an image of her face as she’d released around him flashing into his mind. She was bloody beautiful…like an angel.
He knew the moment she realized he was there. Her body stiffened before she turned sharply towards him, startled. When he made no move towards her, she seemed to relax.
“If you’re looking for your girlfriend, she’s not here,” Buffy told him. “She took off with Liam. And before you ask, no, I don’t think either of them suspects anything. They’re too caught up in their own little flirt-fest.”
He could hear the bitterness in her voice. It matched the taste in his mouth.
“Where did they go?”
“The hell if I know,” Buffy replied. “Something about Drusilla wanting to ‘see L.A.’”
Spike snorted. “See L.A. Please. We bloody live here.”
Buffy looked at him sharply, and Spike realized very quickly he’d said something he hadn’t planned on saying. “You’re supposed to be going to college at Berkley,” Buffy said.
“Oh. Yeah. ‘Bout that.” Spike cleared his throat, then reached up and scratched the back of his head. “Sorta flunked out.”
“Flunked out! William, how could you do that? You’re smart! What, did you just not show up?”
“It wasn’t for me, all right?” Spike barked back, defensively. “And could you not? You’re actually sounding a bit like you are my mum, and that’s just wrong on so many levels.”
Buffy winced. “Sorry. But I didn’t mean that in a, um, mom way. I just, well… Like I said, you’re smart. I thought you’d do well in school.”
“Academically, I did,” Spike replied with a shrug. “At least for that short time I was going. I studied all the time, spent most of the day in the library. It was sort of like boarding school, right down to having to live with the jocks who wanted to make my life miserable.”
“Bad roommates?” Buffy asked, sympathy in her voice. “I had one of those my freshman year, too.” Her nose crinkled. “I’m still convinced that girl was some sort of demon.”
“So you went and dropped out, too?” Spike asked. “What are you on my case for then?”
Something flickered across Buffy’s eyes, and Spike wasn’t sure if it was anger or pain. Or both. “I didn’t leave school because I wanted to. It’s not like I woke up one morning and said, ‘hey, school sucks. I’d rather be a stripper.’”
Spike coughed, his eyes widening. “Stripper?”
Buffy turned immediately pale, aghast in horror as she realized that wasn’t something she’d revealed to William in the past—or had had any plans to either. Her head dropped; she couldn’t look at him as hot, shameful tears stung her eyes. He probably thought badly enough of her after how she’d acted with him, and now, adding this into the mix…
“Is that what you were doing? When you met Liam?” William asked.
“Yeah, I was,” Buffy admitted softly. “I didn’t want to, but I really needed money.”
William has suspected from the beginning that money had been a contributing factor in Buffy’s decision to become the next Mrs. Liam Angelus, but he’d never really stopped to consider how bad her situation might truly have been. He hesitated for a moment before he joined her on the couch, though he kept space between them. “What happened to you, Buffy?”
She wasn’t really sure why she answered. Maybe it was simply because no one had asked like he was now. “My mom. She got…she got really sick.” A lump formed in Buffy’s throat as she thought about it, even after the time that had passed. “We spent everything we had trying to help her get better and then… And then she didn’t.”
For a moment, Buffy was silent, and Spike almost leaned over to touch her before she whispered, “When she was gone, I had nothing.”
Without any thought in his mind but a need to ease her pain, William did reach out to her now. However, Buffy pulled away before his hand made contact with her, and she cleared her throat, forcing her emotions back down.
“But yeah, you shouldn’t have just left school,” she said, turning her gaze on him as her tears dried.
Spike shrugged, deciding not to try to bring the conversation back around to her. If she didn’t want to talk, he wasn’t going to force her. “I didn’t want to be there anymore. I met Dru at a party, and she showed me I could have a different life. So I followed her back to L.A.”
“You threw away your future for some tramp?” Buffy asked, her disbelief pushing out the words before she could even think about them.
Spike’s nostrils flared, a muscle in his jaw ticking hard. “Don’t you dare bloody talk about her like that!” he yelled. He hopped off the couch, and the sudden outburst made Buffy flinch backwards. “You don’t know her!”
Defensive, Buffy shot back, “Oh, please, Spike! She’s run off with your father as we speak. Not exactly the pinnacle of virtue.”
“This coming from the little bitch that seduced her own step-son,” Spike sneered back.
His words stung. Hard. But Buffy wouldn’t let him see that. She held her chin up and glared.
“She’s only with him right now to get back at me,” Spike said, and Buffy recognized that he was speaking more to himself than to her. “She wouldn’t… Even if she knows what I did, she wouldn’t…”
Buffy scoffed. “Oh, please. She fucked him last night, Spike.”
Spike turned on her again, his eyes flaring. “You shut up! All you ever do is fucking lie to me, put my head in a spin! Drusilla wouldn’t do that to me. She loves me.”
“You’re still just as naïve as you ever were, William,” Buffy snapped back. “Why do you think I came downstairs last night? I needed a drink so I could sleep through the sounds of my husband fucking another woman!”
Spike turned on her, grabbing her up from the couch by her arms and giving her a shake. “Stop lying to me!”
Buffy panted, her face inches from his now. “Fuck you,” she spat. “Believe whatever the hell you want. I don’t care.” She stayed stiff in his grip, not fighting but not surrendering either.
Spike knew, somewhere in the back of his mind, that this was getting to be a bit ridiculous. Almost every encounter he’d had with this woman since he’d come back had begun the same way.
And then lead to…
He didn’t want to do it again. He wanted to walk away from her, walk away from all of this. He wanted to find Dru, beg her for forgiveness, and then go back to his life with the woman who loved him.
She wouldn’t hurt him that much…
But this had become a train wreck, no chance of coming to a stop until it derailed. He threw her back on the couch with a growl, then was on top of her, covering her body with his.
Buffy gasped, her hands coming up to hold him to her, delicately manicured nails digging into him through his shirt.
He hated this woman. Just the thought of her made him angrier than he’d ever been in his life.
But fuck, how he wanted her.
He hiked up her skirt and ripped her panties away, discarding them to the floor. Buffy moaned, thrusting her hips up as he shoved two long fingers inside of her, finding her hot and wet to his touch. “You are a little slut,” he growled against her ear as he pushed another finger into her. “Writhing like a little bitch in heat.”
Buffy wanted to deny it, but how could she when his fingers were buried in her cunt? Instead, she moaned, giving into the feelings he was evoking in her body. She never just felt good anymore…
Already, he was drunk on her. Almost as if he was compelled by a force greater than himself, he moved down, replacing his fingers with his tongue. He feasted from her hungrily, lapping and sucking at her, the sounds of her screams barely registering even as they echoed in his ears.
When he finally stopped, she was shaking, panting, tears in her eyes.
He knelt, undid his pants, then slid inside of her with one, sure stroke.
Buffy’s legs trembled even as she raised them to wrap around his hips, pulling him closer. She kept whispering one word over and over again, and it took a while before it finally penetrated Spike’s lust addled brain.
“Please…”
He didn’t know what she was asking for, didn’t know if he could give it to her even if he did. Instead, he came inside of her with a roar, filling her as she clung to him.
For a moment, they lay still, entwined. Then, Spike was pushing off of her getting to his feet and refastening his jeans. He grabbed her ruined panties off the floor as an afterthought and stuff them into his pocket, not sure what compelled him to do it, but not stopping all the same.
He didn’t look at her as he left. He couldn’t. Couldn’t watch her cry.
Buffy sat up and pulled her shaking legs up, knees at her chin, and let him go.
It was late before Liam and Drusilla finally came back to the mansion. Buffy heard Spike and Dru yelling in their room, and she stayed curled up in her bed, flinching at the harsh sounds. Something broke, Spike cursed loudly enough for her to make out the words.
Eventually, however, they left together, Spike’s DeSoto roaring off into the distance until silence fell over the house again.
Buffy heard Liam’s heavy footsteps on the stairs and knew her night was far from over.
I promise I am going somewhere with this. I know the past few chapters have probably seemed like a lot of the same to a few of you, but the plot will be moving along shortly—and there is a plot beyond this.
Please review. It means a lot to me to hear what you think of each chapter.