Interlude: Dawn
On Thursdays I have to be up at 5:30, to get to an early morning training session before my 8:00 class. And I am, like, not a morning person, so it’s not my favorite day. Of course, there is a bonus; Buffy doesn’t run the early morning sessions, so they’re easier. They’d have to be; it’s totally not fair to make Slayers get up this early, even if they didn’t patrol the night before.
After I’ve stumbled through a shower and packed my stuff, I walk through the living room and drop my bags on the couch; which I can do now that Andrew has, thank God, moved back to London and is no longer camping his annoying butt on our couch. Except, the couch throws my bags off. I’ve already drawn the stake Buffy insists I carry and gone into a fighting stance before I register that the threat is a cranky Buffy.
“Geez, Dawn, don’t you watch what you’re doing?” Buffy rubs her cheek. “You have to be more careful, you could have seriously injured me.”
I’m trying really, really hard not to get annoyed, because Buffy was a freak show yesterday after Spike called, and I want to be a good, supportive type person. “Sorry. I’m really tired, and I didn’t expect you to be sleeping on the couch, so I didn’t see you. Hey, what are you doing on the couch, anyway?” Oh, no, what now? “Is Spike okay? Is Willow…?”
“Shh, Dawn, they’re both fine.” Buffy reaches out both hands to me, and when I grab them, she pulls me onto the couch and into her arms. She’s been really huggy lately. It’s weird. Nice, though. “It’s just…Spike said last night that he’d call in the morning, and I couldn’t sleep, so I came out here to watch TV. And, you know, to be next to the phone in case it rang.”
Buffy shrugs, and I guess she feels silly for worrying, so I don’t say anything. We sit there, just holding each other for a minute, before I get her to eat breakfast with me. “So, explain this to me again. If you can’t even sleep because you’re so worried, why aren’t you on the way to Los Angeles already?” Not that I want Buffy running off, but there’s no way she'd let him dust again. She’s been happy since we found out he’s really back.
“Dawn…” Buffy shakes her head, and watches the toaster instead of making eye contact, until I just wanna scream at her. Finally, she meets my eyes. “It’s not that I don’t want to be there for him…Them. But, I have other responsibilities now, not just to you and the other Slayers, but to Giles and the Council. I can’t go taking off whenever I feel like it. Plus, you know there’s a Wolfram & Hart office here in Rome, right? Well, what if they try something? Who would lead you guys, if I wasn’t here?”
It sounds like a bunch of B.S. excuses, but I let Buffy think she’s convinced me, and we finish breakfast in silence. When I start getting ready to go, she stops me. “Umm, Dawn? Do you wanna, maybe, take the morning off? I could use some company.”
I nod. That’s all I really can do, 'cause now I’m confused and freaked out. Buffy almost never admits she needs help, or that she’s scared or lonely. I usually get it, but she doesn’t like to admit she feels any way that might upset me. She totally acts like a Mom, sometimes.
We haven’t been back on the couch for long before the phone rings. 6:30 a.m.. When Spike says he’ll call in the morning, he doesn’t play around. Buffy answers before the first ring is even over, and as she and Spike exchange hellos, I can feel her muscles relax. Normally Buffy would be better about keeping things from me, but today it’s all out there. That’s either because it’s Spike and I understand about him, or she’s so freaked she can’t pretend to be calm. Whatever; it’s not a good sign.
Buffy’s end of the conversation is really not informative. “So, how are things going? Well, that’s good. Willow said she found one of the Slayers. Really? Really, wow, that’s weird. And she knew Wesley? My Ex-Watcher, Wesley?" Long pause. "You’re kidding. Are you thinking about it, now? Well, if it happens, we’ll worry then. Maybe Willow…No, of course, I get that.”
It goes on like that for, like, ten minutes before Buffy remembers that her lap warmer is a me. “Hey, Dawn’s laying all over me, waiting for her turn to talk to you.” Right, like laying here with my head in her lap like some kind of puppy was my idea. “Here you go.” Buffy hands me the phone, and as I sit up she springs off the couch, headed for who knows where.
“Spike?” Thought I’d check, in case she’s gone completely around the bend.
“’Lo, Nibblet. Skipping your training session this morning?”
“Buffy said she wanted some company, so I figured I'd stick around. Not like she says stuff like that all the time.”
He chuckles. “Nope. I love her, but Buffy is not where you go for the touchy-feelies. Not in her nature, I expect.”
I shrug, even though he can’t see me. “Not really. She’s been better, though. Since we got to Rome, especially the last few weeks.” That’s because of him, and I’m totally grateful. Not like I want her slobbering over me, but it’s nice to see actual facial expressions, instead of that Buffy-bot-like ‘of course I’m happy, why wouldn’t I be’ look she used after Sunnydale. She’s not bubbly-happy all the time, not even since Spike started speaking to us again, but she’s a real person, which is much cooler than plastic Buffy.
We talk for a few minutes about my classes, and he threatens my new boyfriend a little before I can steer him around to talking about what’s going on. Buffy told me what he said yesterday, but I need to hear it from him. By the time he's done, I'm sorry I asked.
“You’ve gotta promise me you’re not gonna dust again, or I will so find a way to get Mom to hunt down your butt in the afterlife and give you shit.” Well, damn, I meant to be more Slayer-y about that, but I guess using my psudo-little-sister powers won’t hurt anything.
He sighs, "Not gonna make promises I can't keep, Nibblet. Try my hardest, though. I still need to meet this boy who thinks he's good enough for my Dawn."
"It's gonna be bad, isn't it?" I ask. Duh, it's an apocalypse, they're always bad.
"Yeah. But we'll make it, never fear Sweet Bit. And if we don't, you have my permission to send Mum after me."
"Right, like I need your permission." Buffy swishes back into the room, all dressed and ready to go, with her long bleached hair pulled into a ponytail. I don't get the whole bleach thing. I mean, I guess it was an homage to Spike, but she always made fun of his hair. Did I mention I don't get it?
Buffy holds out her hand and wiggles her fingers to demand the phone, and I inform Spike with a loud sigh, "Spike, Buffy's bothering me!"
She snatches the phone from me, and we can both hear his laugh echoing from the receiver. "Hey." She puts the phone to her ear, glaring, until I realize I've taken up the entire couch. I make room for Buffy and the glaring stops. When she's sitting again, I curl up with my head in her lap again, and listen to them talk. It's soothing, and there's no way I want to go to class now.
Their conversations are always really strange, but I wouldn't expect anything else from them. There's usually a bunch of 'remember when', and some gossip and true confessions, and the lovey-dovey stuff. If I stay quiet, I can hear the murmur of his voice from the phone, and laying here I can watch Buffy's face. There's a happy smile at the corners of her mouth as she listens to him, and I let myself drift in the quiet. For just a few seconds, I imagine we're a real family, and Spike is just away on business. His life isn't in danger, and he'll be home with us before we know it.
"So, if Wesley decides to send this guy away, you're gonna go cover Willow's back, right? Because, I don't think I need to tell you that if she gets hurt, you're all gonna be in deep doodie." I frown. First thing wrong with that sentence; it burst my normal bubble. Second; what's up with the not-swearing? I open my eyes and blink up at her, and a little hand strokes my cheek. Buffy has such tiny hands. It's hard to imagine her kicking demon ass until you've seen her in person.
After a few more minutes of strategizing and reassuring, Buffy reminds Spike to call her the second something changes, she'll have her cell phone glued to her. "Seriously, Will, call me for any little thing, I'll go crazy if I don't know what's going on." Then. "I'm keeping Dawn with me, so if you don't call, I'm not the only one you'll be disappointing."
News to me. And, geez, guilt much? When I get the phone I just tell him I love him, and to be safe. Buffy can handle the threats this time. When she takes the phone back and says, "I love you, William." I get a lump in my throat. Yeah, so I'm a girl, but it's so great that she's treating Spike like a real person. There are no threats, just the two of them saying their goodbyes, and soon Buffy puts the phone on the table next to her, and sinks back into the couch.
"You don't mind, do you?" I sit up and lean back next to her, as Buffy rambles. "I mean, I know you have school stuff, and I have Slayer stuff, and you might have a date or something…It's okay if you don't want to hang out, but…"
"It's cool, Buffy. I want to hang out with you. But, maybe we should go over to the Slayer Center. It might not be so bad if we're busy." Buffy doesn't look sold on that idea, but she goes along with it.
We're driving ourselves crazy with the waiting, so we go to the 9:00 a.m. training session to have something to do. I think Buffy would have let Alvand take over, but I'd have started hitting her if I didn't get to hit something else. She's even more distracted than she was yesterday afternoon, and the other girls are starting to notice. I'm jittery, and I actually get knocked over by one of the newbies.
The phone doesn't ring again until 10:30 a.m., when we're back in Buffy's office, arguing over who gets to use her private shower first. I take advantage of her distraction to slip into the bath and lock the door. They probably want to talk privately, anyway.
When I get out, Buffy is crying into the phone. "I hate this. I'm supposed to be with you, and I can't be there, and it's driving me nuts, Spike." I flinch, because I know I wasn't meant to hear that, and it hurts to see her like this. "I know, but you shouldn't be worrying about me, you should be focusing on what you need to do, and here I am distracting you…I know you do. I love you, too."
She takes a deep breath. "I'm glad you and Willow had a nice talk, I'll bet she's been itching to do some Nancy Drew-ing ever since I called her. Just don't let her pick your brain too literally, you're gonna need to be in good shape for whatever Angel has planned." There's a watery chuckle. "When's the meeting again? Okay, could you tell me in hours, I'm no good at the whole time zone thing. So, 2:00 p.m. my time. You guys'll call me if you need anything, right? Promise? Did you want to talk to Dawn, the shower's off. Alright, I'll talk to her. Take care of yourself, okay?"
Spike doesn't want to talk to me? Since when? I leave the bathroom ready to give her a piece of my mind, but Buffy looks so upset, curled up in her desk chair, cradling her cell phone like it's a lifeline, which I guess it is right now. So, I let it go.
Buffy looks up at me, with a tiny little smile that's probably more about making me feel better than her being happy. "Hey, Dawnie, have a seat, okay? I need to talk to you about something."
Oh, God. Moments like these usually involve big emotionally prickly issues. I so don't see the sense in being more upset than we are already. But, I sit across the desk from her, and Buffy fills me in on what Willow and Spike are doing in LA.
Then she tells me a story. And I wouldn't believe it, except that it's about Spike, and Buffy is so over lying about him. I'm crying by the time she's done, and I know it's stupid to cry, because it all happened was before I was created, but oh wow; I always said he was different from other vampires, but I never knew.
Buffy walks around the desk and pulls me into her arms, trying to soothe my tears. "Hey, it's okay, I didn't mean to upset you. We just thought you should know, that maybe you'd think it was an interesting story…Shhh, Dawn, it's okay…"
After a few minutes, the phone rings again, and Buffy reaches around me to grab it. "Hello?" When I look up her forehead is scrunched, but it smoothes out as she listens, and then she smiles. "It's Willow." She tells me. "She has a spell we can use to see what's going on in LA, from her point of view. Wanna tune in?"
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Author's Chapter Notes:
I needed to get the Spuffy in somehow, since Spike and Buffy are currently in different countries, with Buffy’s job (and a prophecy!) keeping them apart. So, a brief interlude in the action, revealing the ‘pressing engagement’ Spike had to leave dinner for, and other little bits of the puzzle. PLEASE REVIEW!!!!