He sighed heavily. One night stands weren’t something he had a lot of experience with and he was sure that there were some unwritten rules about the practice that he had yet to learn. It was the only reason he could come up with for her enthusiasm coupled with her underlying hesitance. He was doing something wrong here, but knowing that and doing something about it were two totally different things.
So, he did the only thing he could think of. He shrugged.
Buffy blinked at him and opened her mouth to say something, but must have thought better of it because her jaw snapped shut with a clink of her teeth.
They sat in silence for a long time. The twinkling lights from the Christmas tree throwing patterns of color against the walls and the only sound was from the crackling pop of the fire roaring a few feet away. It was uncomfortable at best and William fought the urge to just jump up and run.
“You know, I was wondering when this was going to happen.”
William turned to look at Buffy and was met with anger and humiliation. Again, surprise flooded through him and he tried to comprehend this new turn of her emotions.
“When what was going t’ happen?” He asked, his voice a bit too high to be taken seriously. He groaned inwardly. Why must he always sound like such a child?
She rolled her eyes at him. “When you finally showed your true colors. When you’d turn into an asshole!” Suddenly, she was grabbing her clothes and running off up the stairway.
His brows furrowed together. What the bloody hell had just happened? He could have sworn that not ten minutes earlier they were happily basking in each other’s embrace and now she was storming off and calling him an asshole.
It was quite obvious she didn’t want him here and maybe it was for the best that he left. Honestly, what had he thought was going to happen? That she’d fall in love with him? That they’d ride off into the sunset and live happily ever after? God, he was such a git.
Grabbing his jeans, he pulled them on and fastened the button before slipping his belt through the loops. He shoved his feet into his boots and almost broke one of the laces from the strain.
He wanted to throw his arms up in frustration. Why didn’t anything go right for him? What travesty could he have performed in a previous life that prevented him from having someone to love? And why in the sodding hell was he always falling for women he could never have? It was enough to make any sane man completely bug-shagging bonkers.
His jaw was set in a tense line that grew ever tighter and his fists balled at his sides. He was tired of these games and even more tired of the women that played them. What was the point of lying and manipulating? They could have just said outright that they only wanted a shag and he could’ve dealt with that, but instead they fiddled around in his head and made him believe that they had some interest in him that went beyond scratching an itch.
He started past the stairway to the kitchen, but suddenly, his feet were glued to the floor. As his anger and feelings of betrayal grew, he found himself striding up the stairs, taking two at a time in his urgency.
Her muffled cries echoed in the hallway and William turned to follow the sound. He couldn’t believe she had the nerve to cry after the scene she had just made. Who the hell did she think she was?
He hesitated for less than a second before storming through the door.
Buffy was huddled on the large four-poster bed, wrapped in a down-comforter, completely oblivious to his presence as she continued to sob.
“What the hell is your soddin’ problem!” He shouted as he slammed the door behind him.
Her head shot up. “Get out! I want you to leave!”
His anger deflated slightly and he almost obeyed, but he refused to be anyone’s puppet again. Nope, not anymore. Not this man. “No!” He told her defiantly. “I’m not leaving until you tell me what jus’ happened down there.”
She gave him an odd look. “Huh?”
“I don’t believe I stuttered, luv,” he replied with a cold glare.
“Are you some sort of psycho?” If she was afraid of him, she didn’t show it, even if she thought he was psychotic.
Wait. She thought he was psychotic?
“What?”
“I don’t believe I stuttered, love. Are you a nut job?”
“No,” he said indignantly. “But I’m beginning t’ think you are.”
“Me?”
He nodded. “Yeah, you. I’m thinkin’ maybe you have that split personality disorder. Maybe that’d explain why you jus’ did a one-eighty on me down there.”
“Me?”
Instead of responding, he crossed his arms over his bare chest and leaned up against the dresser. She wasn’t going to be able to talk her way out of this. All he had to do was wait.
“If anyone did a one-eighty, it was you, buddy,” she told him.
That threw him off-kilter. “What do you mean?”
“Oh, come on! You were there!”
He pushed off from the dresser and stomped to the bed, noticing that her back straightened immediately and she took a defensive pose. “Yeah, I was there an’ all I saw was you messin’ with my head. But then again, I should’ve expected nothin’ less.”
“What! Are you freaking kidding me?” She shook her head at him, eyes wide and mouth slightly open. “Look, I don’t know what loony bin you escaped from, but let me clear things up for you before I kick your sorry-ass out of my house. You were the one who went all Sybil on me. I thought we were having a good time. Hell, you were the one who said it was the best night of your life, so how was I supposed to know that you were only interested in a fling? And I asked you to stay the rest of the night because, hey, I thought maybe this could be something more, but all I get is this fucking shrug like it means nothing to you.”
William blinked, completely gobsmacked into silence. Only interested in a fling? Him? Where had she gotten that from?
Tears welled up in her eyes again as she pointed to the door. “Just go, William. Please.”
“I didn’t...You...I...” He was stammering like an idiot even though the words were clear in his head. Why couldn’t he form a coherent sentence? “Buffy. I’m not...That’s not...”
“What?” Her voice sounded desperate and he clung on to the hope that maybe she really wanted to hear what he was trying so ineloquently to say.
Taking a deep breath, he steadied himself. He sat down next to her on the bed and silently cheered when she didn’t try to move away from him.
All right, you wanker. You’ve got one shot at this. Make it count.
“I-It’s not jus’ a...fling t’ me,” he said softly, not able to meet her gaze.
“It’s not?”
He shook his head. “No.”
“Then why did you-?”
“I don’t know.”
Slowly, he raised his head and glanced over at her, trying to gauge her reaction. It was neither angry nor sad, but he couldn’t call it happiness either. There was definitely an emotion coloring her face, though he wasn’t quite sure what that emotion was and he was almost too afraid to find out.
“What is this to you?” She asked, leaning close enough that he could feel her warm breath on his skin.
“I suppose that depends on you.”
Buffy felt her heart clench tightly at the hopeful gaze William was giving her. He really had no idea how much she wanted to be with him.
Okay, so maybe that was partly her fault. She knew she had been giving him slightly mixed signals, but in her own defense, she really hadn’t been sure if a relationship was something he wanted to explore or not. And her days of being a glutton for punishment were over and she wasn’t about to go putting herself out there when there was a strong possibility of being rejected.
Of course, she went and did that anyway.
“Well, apart from this whole thing,” she began, waving her hand around the room. “I was having a lot of fun with you.”
William frowned at her. “Fun?”
She squeezed her eyes shut. Wow, Buff, way to make a guy feel wanted. “What I mean is... I like you, William. You’re all I’ve thought about since that day at the Christmas tree lot and honestly, I really didn’t think we were going to do this tonight. I just... I just wanted to get to know you.”
His frown disappeared as he squinted at her in confusion. “So, you didn’t really want t’ have sex with me, then?”
“Huh? No! I did.” She considered that for a moment before giving him a grin. “I definitely wanted to have sex with you. I just didn’t think it would happen tonight. I mean, I don’t do this.”
“This?”
Buffy laughed shyly. “You know... Bring some guy I don’t even know home with me and then get down and funky with him the first night. I mean, there was that one time, but I didn’t bring him home with me and I kind of already knew him and...” Babbling! You’re babbling!
“Why did you then?”
“Sleep with him?”
His arched eyebrow told her he didn’t mean Parker Abrams and the semi-drunken night they had spent together. Oh. Ooops.
“Besides the fact that you’re hot?”
A deep blush spread across his cheeks and he looked away for a moment. “I’m not.”
Buffy studied him before bringing her hand up to cup his cheek. “I don’t know who told you that, but she is an idiot.”
Clear, blue eyes widened as he stared at her, open and vulnerable. Someone must have really done a number on him, she decided and gave him a reassuring smile.
“I don’t really know why. All I know is that it felt right,” she told him.
“Right...”
She giggled a little. “You keep repeating everything I say.”
“Sorry,” he replied sheepishly.
“Nothing to be sorry about. It just makes it really hard to tell if we’re on the same page or if I’m making a complete fool of myself.”
“You’re not making a fool o’ yourself, luv.”
She smiled softly then took a deep breath. “What happened? I mean, did I do something to make you think I didn’t like you?”
He didn’t respond at first, but then he hesitantly began to explain. “You didn’t look like you really wanted me t’ stay.”
“But I asked you,” she pointed out.
“I know. I just thought you looked a bit...unsure an’ then I thought I might have been reading the whole thing wrong.”
“Oh, Will. I wasn’t unsure about you staying. I really wanted...want you to stay,” she said, feeling incredibly stupid.
“Then...?”
She shrugged. “Maybe I was worried you’d say no.”
“Why would I say no?”
“Well, I’m not exactly a spring chicken here, William. I am old and I’ve got kids and a whole lot of baggage. And you are young and smart and the most attractive man I’ve ever seen outside of a magazine, why the hell would you want me?”
There. She’d said it. It had been eating at her since he had agreed to come home with her and she had finally gotten it out in the open. She really didn’t know what she had to offer him beyond some good sex and... Well, no, that was pretty much it.
She had expected some comforting words. Maybe a blank stare. Possibly a pat on the back. She had not been expecting him to start laughing like he was at a Three Stooges marathon.
“Hey!” She exclaimed indignantly.
He shook his head at her. “Sorry. I...’m...not...laugh...in’...at...you...” His words were broken up between chuckles as he tried to calm himself down.
“Well, you’re not laughing with me, so you must be laughing at me,” she pouted.
His laughter died down, but he was still shaking his head at her. “Old, huh? I don’t know who told you that, but he is an idiot.”
“Not he. She. And she has seen entirely too many wrinkles in the mirror to convince herself she’s not old,” Buffy said.
“I think you’re seeing things, luv.”
“Nope. They’re there. I saw one just this morning.”
His calloused hand slid under her chin and angled her face before his fingertips ghosted over her golden skin. “Funny, I don’t see anything.”
“You’re blind.”
“It’s hard t’ see flaws when they don’t exist.”
And then his lips were covering hers in kiss so sweet that she was sure would send her into a diabetic coma. She felt his arms go around her and pull her into the hard wall of his chest. The comforter that she’d wrapped around herself was gently peeled back and thrown to the foot of the bed, leaving her naked in his arms.
He laid her back on the bed and covered her with his body, his teeth teasing her bottom lip before soothing the worried skin with his tongue. He trailed hot kisses against her cheek and nibbled at her ear, sucking the fleshy lobe in his mouth.
“I think...” He sounded breathless and Buffy felt a shiver go through her body. She did this to him. She made him all raspy and wanting. “I think I’m falling in love with you.”
What? Her eyes popped open at his whispered confession and she pulled away from him. “William?”
His eyes blinked furiously, like he had just been awoken from a deep sleep. “I-Is that okay?”
She was too shocked to say anything at first. Was he serious? The sincere fear of rejection on his face made her think he was completely serious. No, she didn’t think, she knew. He was falling in love with her.
“I mean, you asked me what this was t’ me an’-”
"You're falling in love with me. I'm guessing that means you want more than just a fling, huh?"
"Only if that's what you want," he said quickly and if it was possible, Buffy fell even deeper.
William was like no one she'd ever met before. He was so bare, so open that he radiated with emotion even when he tried hard not to. She could tell he thought it was a burden to show that much of himself, but that was what made him who he was. He wouldn't be William without that vulnerability.
Even now, he was afraid she'd say no despite her declarations to the contrary.
She nodded and cupped his cheek in her hand as she stared up into the endless ocean of his eyes. "That's what I want. I want you."
He moaned and before she had a chance to see his full reaction, he was kissing her again. Deep, passionate and burning, his tongue slid over hers, stoking the fire with each gentle sweep. One hand dove through the tangled mess of her hair and the other drifted up her hip, over her waist, and upward to palm her breast.
"Will," she murmured, arching her back high when he plucked at one dusky-colored nipple. "The condoms...they're down-"
"Shhh." He traced her lip with the tip of his tongue before giving her a teasing nip. "I want t' do something first. Will you let me?"
A part of her was a little leery of what he might be suggesting. She knew he wouldn’t do anything to intentionally hurt her, but she couldn’t stop the purely pornographic images that seemed to come unbidden through her mind.
“Okay,” she finally said, pushing away the ridiculous fears that really had no place here.
He smiled softly and kissed her once more before descending down her body. Stopping at her breasts, he stared for a moment, drinking the sight of her in before capturing a nipple between his lips and suckling it into his mouth.
She cried out in surprise. Was it supposed to feel like that? Her whole body felt like it was buzzing with pleasure and he hadn’t even touched her below the waist yet.
His tongue flicked over the sensitive bud and teased its twin with his fingers, each lash and twist eliciting a short, but sensual mewl from deep in her throat. She didn’t remember ever being this vocal before.
The grin he gave her in response was positively sinful and suddenly, William didn't look so innocent. He looked wicked and dangerous, like he was the big bad wolf ready to eat her up. A shiver ran down her spine as she looked into his predatory gaze.
He licked a path between her breasts and down to her bellybutton, tonguing the indentation until she was squirming beneath him. Who knew the bellybutton was such an erogenous zone? He sucked at the taut skin of her stomach, leaving a small dark red mark before he continued down.
Stopping just above her pussy, his eyes shot up, giving her a questioning look. "Is this okay?"
Buffy's eyebrows rose. "Why wouldn't it be?"
A flush of embarrassment went over his pale skin and he glanced over at the wall. "My ex-girlfriend didn't... She didn't like it."
Didn't like it? What was wrong with this girl? William hadn't said much about this ex-girlfriend of his, but Buffy could plainly see that she was the root of a lot of issues for him. She sounded like a real bitch, to be honest. Who would give a guy like Will up? And she didn't like him going down on her? There was something definitely wrong with this picture.
Buffy propped herself up a little, her elbows supporting her already jello-fied form. "Do you want to?"
"Yes," he said softly.
"Then I want you to."
William felt like he had died and gone to heaven when he got his first taste of her. His tongue flattened against her soft pink folds and he drew upward until he hit the tightened button of her clit. Her hips bucked as he repeated the motion and added a swirl at the end.
"Am I doin' this right?" He asked her, his voice taking on a husky timber that pronounced his accent even more.
Her breathing was hard and heavy as she arched her back, like she was stretching out under the sun. "If you were doing it any more right, I'd be a puddle of goo right now."
He silently sighed in relief. Despite how much he enjoyed giving oral sex, he really hadn't had all that much experience with it. Cecily was the only girl he'd ever done this with before and she seemed less than pleased with the experience. To this day, he still wasn't quite sure if she just didn't like it all or if she didn't like it from him, but he was seriously beginning to doubt that the latter was true. After all, Buffy seemed to enjoy it and he didn't think she was the type to lie about what she found pleasurable.
Dipping his head back down, he inhaled her sweet scent before zigzagging his tongue up her wet crevice. He could do this for days if she'd let him.
Her fingers tunneled through his wild platinum curls and held on tight as he sucked her clit into his mouth. She thrashed beneath him, moaning in pleasure, and he finally had to bring his hands up to hold her hips still.
"Please," she whimpered helplessly.
He ran his index finger through her slickness, up, down, up, down, until he finally slid into her hot passage. She clenched around his finger so tightly, he thought he might explode right then and there. It sent images and ghost sensations of her silken walls trembling around his cock straight to his brain and he jerked involuntarily against the mattress.
Maybe it hadn't been such a great idea to not go and grab those condoms after all.
His attentions returned to her clit and he flicked his tongue against the overly-sensitive nub as he slid his finger in and out of her wetness. He devoured her, consumed her until she started to quake, her whole body twitching and convulsing as she cried out in release. She flowed like a river after a heavy rain and he drank her down until there was nothing left.
Her chest rose and fell rapidly as she tried to catch her breath. "A part of me wants to ask where you learned that, but I really don't want to know."
He chuckled, leaning in to kiss the inside of her thigh. She probably wouldn't have believed him if he told her that he had just made it up as he went along anyway.
"So..." He began, taking a deep breath as he pushed himself up. "Are we...okay?"
"I think we're more than okay, Will."
"Yeah?"
Buffy grinned at him. "Oh, yeah."