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A/N: No twins, singles, threesomes, sexsomes, or anything were harmed in the writing of this fic. Just my BRAIN. Oh man, there are no warnings that exist for this psychotic...monster.


Spike, Buffy, and Will stood in front of the door. Buffy glanced at her lovers, then back to the plain white door. It looked so...innocent. Not the kind of thing you'd expect to find on the bottom floor of a kinky sex club.

“So...explain this to me again,” Buffy said skeptically. No, that door was just way too normal looking. Spike rolled his neck from side to side, a picture of barely contained anxious energy, but Will tilted her head and regarded her seriously.

“We don't have to do this,” he told her. Buffy and Spike rolled their eyes at his over protectiveness. Where his brother was practically buzzing with anticipation, Will was withdrawing to the over-analytical and protective space that made him hover like an annoying gnat.

“I'm FINE. Really. It's just...weird, y'know? Hard to wrap my head around.” Spike grinned lazily at her.

“It's the last little bit of magic left in the world,” he drawled. Buffy had never seen Spike quite like this. He'd gone so far around anticipatory that he'd hit mellow and loose. Almost calm. But Buffy knew better; that outward appearance just hid how incredibly ready Spike was to just go for this. Will was just an interested, but was channeling everything into makeing sure Buffy was OK and still on board with their foray into...well, they'd know when they opened the door.

“So, once last time...how does this work?” Spike jumped in before Will could ascertain whether or not Buffy was REALLY REALLY sure.

“We walk in, and find something that will blow our minds and rock our world, and that we want. Badly,” he murmured against her ear. Buffy shuddered as the gentle threads of arousal that had coiled in her stomach during the ride over here blossomed into almost painful arousal.

“Through magic,” she murmured, her voice husky. Her eyes darted to Spike's red lips and his talented tongue trailed over them.

“Magic helps,” Spike agreed, getting lost in her green eyes. He was leaning towards her, captivated, when she suddenly moved away.

“Let's do this.” Spike and Buffy jerked away as Will's voice, hard with nerves and determination, broke their spell. He opened to door to reveal...

...a room.

“Huh,” Buffy muttered, looking around. The floor was carpeted with a cushy material, a little firmer than an ordinary mattress. There were pillows everywhere, and the walls were lined with long strips of luxurious-looking cloth, each with its own texture. The only 'furniture' of any sort were two chests against opposing walls; the ones that didn't have doors leading out of them. It was almost like something out of an erotic desert novel, stopping just short of being cliched. Nice, but not something that was going to quote “rock her world.” Though she could think of some VERY fun things to do with those long strips of cloth...

“Sooooooooooo...” Buffy started, looking around. Both Spike and Will were looking a bit perplexed, so she figured this wasn't normal. “What's up?”

“It wasn't like this last time,” Spike murmured. He seemed to have deflated a little, his eyes searching the open room.

“But it's different every time, and they're never wrong,” Will said, his eyes squinting in the way that meant he was deep in thought.

“I don't--” Spike stopped abruptly as the door on the other side of the room swung open.

“Oh, no way!” Buffy stared at the trio before her. Well this was...different. Unexpected. Two copies of herself stared back at her, mouths open. One...Spike/Will-type person stood between them looking very smug. She turned her stunned gaze to her Twinlets, who were practically salivating.

“Wicked!” a gravelly, husky voice said delightedly. Buffy's attention was drawn back to her...their...dopplegangers. There was one who looked almost exactly like her, down to the dye job in her hair, and another that she suspected would be her if she ever wanted to go brunette again (which was never). Though looking at the way her green eyes and golden skin were set off by the darker locks, she may consider giving it serious thought. The guy looked like Spike, with his bleached hair, but the way he was hovering protectively over the two girls spoke more of Will. The Blonde-Buffy-Clone-Person turned to her one Twinlet-looking-guy. “Why don't WE get two of you?”

Buffy, getting to see the full force of her pout in action, decided she needed to use it more.

The man sidled up to her and whispered something in BBCP's (man, they need to introduce each other) ear. Buffy had to bite back a growl at the lascivious leer that broke across dopplebitch's face as she looked at HER Twinlets as if they were an all you can eat buffet.

***

Buffy felt a familiar thrill race up her spine as Spike sidled up to her, strong arms wrapping around her waist, hardness pressing into her ass. But she simply couldn't take her eyes off of the stunning tableau before her—TWO SPIKES! TWO. WTF?! She felt Spike smile against her neck.

“Why have two when you could have three?” he whispered, his voice low. Buffy felt a slow, ridiculous leer stretch across her face. Three...dreamy. She was pulled from her increasingly XXX-rated fantasies as a growl reverberated through the room. She KNEW that growl. She WAS that growl. She saw her not-twin glaring at her from the other side of the room, heat and warning in her eyes. Silly girl who didn't know to share. Buffy threw back her head and laughed. She approached the new girl with intent, crossing some invisible line that divided their realities, and pulled her doppleganger into a deep, wet kiss.

***

Of all the things Buffy was expecting, THIS hadn't made the list. OK, well, it had maybe tried to appear somewhere on the list as a side note or special case, but still...the other Buffy-person was a really good kisser. Like, really good. And wow, was she getting turned on like a faucet or what?

Will almost came like a 16-year-old getting his first blow job. Christ, Buffy was being mouth-fucked by...Buffy. Will shifted back into Spike as he came up behind him, hissing when a large, warm hand snuck down the front of his incredibly tight pants. Spike squeezed, and Will thrust back in retaliation.

Liz's eyes jumped from the two couples on the other side of the room. Jesus, this wasn't a kink she'd have ever guessed she had. Her eyes were huge, pupils dilated with lust when Spike moved to her side. Seeing his lover's distraction, Spike did the one thing he knew would garner him Liz's absolute undivided attention: he nibbled the sweet spot on her neck, just beneath one dainty little ear. Liz spun towards him with a soft yelp. Spike arched a lazy eyebrow at Liz's frazzled appearance and lust-dumb look.

“Well?” he drawled with a smirk. Liz rolled her eyes, but couldn't help the blush that stained her face and traveled well beyond the line of her shirt. Spike knew about that blush; he'd caused enough of them, and he couldn't help but grin, totally smitten that he could still make her blush after all this time. It was charmingly innocent, whereas he had to work to get Buffy to even turn faintly pink. He could count on one hand the number of times that little vixen had ever truly blushed for him. But blushing didn't let Liz off the hook. “Hit a button have we?” he taunted.

Liz's answering giggle drew the attention of the other, previously occupied, people in the room, who got to spend several moments watching Spike and Liz try to devour one another. The scent of sex and lust was heavy on the air, and libidos were raging.

Buffy watched her lovers enjoying themselves until she started felling a little left out, and that for their own health, her lovers should probably come up for air sometime soon. She strode over to the duo and pulled them apart, wrenching Spike to her for a brutal, possessive kiss and then doing the same to Liz, marking them as hers, and action Will greatly appreciated and had quite a mind to imitate. But the other Buffy's return to her side left them segregated again, each trio eyeing the other speculatively.

“I ah...” Buffy started, but found the words caught in her throat. She took a moment to calm down a little before trying again. “I think we should introduce ourselves.” See, that wasn't so hard she congratulated herself.

“I'm Buffy,” the mirror-version of her answered, he voice a little more seductive than Buffy's normally was.

“Funny, so am I.” They stared at each other across the imaginary line that divided them. Something happened, and the one-of-two-Buffy grinned slowly, almost lazily.

“You can call me B,” she said with a shrug. B threw an arm around her sister. “And this is Liz.”

“I can introduce myself you know,” Liz primly informed her sister. Buffy just gave her that infuriating 'whatcha gonna do about it Big Sis?” look, which made Liz huff and cross her arms stubbornly. Fucking twin sisters. Who needed them. She unwound a little as Spike threaded a hand through her hair soothingly.

“Relax, luv” Spike mumbled, his attention focused on the deep scalp massage he was giving Liz. He'd found it was the easiest way to calm Liz down when Buffy was being antagonizing or bitchy...or God forbid, both. He glanced up at the Buffy across from him. “'M Spike, nice to meet you, luv.” He grinned as Buffy gave him a small smile a little wave. Adorable. And good to know his twin counterparts had found her.

Buffy nudged her closest twinlet in the ribs.

“What?” Spike asked irritably, rubbing his side melodramatically. Buffy rolled her eyes at his obstinacy.

“Be polite and introduce yourselves!” Will and Spike exchanged one of those Twin looks Buffy hadn't decoded yet and shared a secret grin, which then expanded to include and amused-looking other!Spike. “What? What?!”

“We already know each other pet,” other!Spike informed her, his eyes traveling over the twin versions of himself in a most intimate and knowing way.

“REALLY?” Liz and B said in tandem.

“This is not my first rodeo cowboy,” Spike drawled sarcastically in an admittedly passable John Wayne impression. B slugged him on the arm for his troubles.

“You three KNOW each other?” Buffy asked, her eyes asking a whole host of other questions. Will and Spike exchanged another look and shrugged.

“We were in a place,” Will said, as if that explained everything.

“A place?” Buffy repeated dubiously.

“A place...that requires three of you?” B questioned sardonically.

“I TOLD you he was full of himself,” Liz said with a huge grin. The three women in the room shared a moment, while the three men suffered in silence together.

“Wait...THREE of you?” The men all glanced at each other before their eyes skittered around the room like bugs on acid. The women gaped, their mind short circuiting at the image of three....three...

A/N (2): Yes, there's more. Yes, I'm writing it. Yes, this is what happens when you're in grad school and you have NO LIFE in the middle of freaking LOS ANGELES and your brain just goes what the fuck, stranger shit's happened. And that's my only excuse.





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