As the party grew nearer, Buffy became more unsure of her plan. By the time the night before the party arrived, she was ready to crack from the pressure. Was it really right to try to trick Spike into admitting his feelings? And even worse, what if his answer wasn’t what she expected or wanted it to be.
It was no secret that she was not his first lover. What if she was no different than any of his others. Maybe he is always so affectionate? she thought lying in her bed staring at the ceiling. Buffy couldn’t help but dread the summer ending. Even if Spike did love her, it wouldn’t be the same. Finally, after many hours of tossing and turning Buffy managed to fall asleep.
When she awoke the next morning her dread had turned to despair. It had been over a week since Spike had even tried to talk to her. This is a mistake Buffy thought as the tears welled in her eyes. Climbing out of bed, she decided to tell Anya she was calling off their plan. Reaching for her phone she noticed a small wrapped box on her night side table.
Buffy pulled the small card off and opened it. To my beautiful kitten, have a wonderful day, S Buffy’s eyes widened. Her trembling fingers carefully opened the small box, careful not to rip or damage it in any way. When she opened the tiny box, she immediately started to cry.
Inside of the box was a long silver necklace. At the end of the necklace were thirty eight tiny diamonds in the shape of a kitty, with two small emeralds as the eyes. Buffy had never seen anything more beautiful. As the tears flowed down her face, she couldn’t stop smiling. No one had ever given her anything like that. The best part about it wasn’t the beauty or the price. It was that he had picked it out for her. It was what he always called her.
He loves me, she thought happily bouncing toward the shower.
********************
Spike paced back and forth at the bottom of the steps. He knew he should head up to the party. Anya had already sent Xander down the twice to hurry him up. The last time he nearly ripped the whelps head off.
Leaning his forehead against the wall he took several slow, deep breaths desperately trying to calm his frazzled nerves. He had taken thousands of photographs of hundreds of women. However, he didn’t have to remind himself this wasn’t just any woman. This was Buffy. She somehow had the ability to turn him into the awkward young boy he had thought long gone.
I’m scared to death of a teenager Spike admonished himself. But deep down he knew he wasn’t scared of her, but of the feelings she had invoked within him. Somewhere in the fallow depths of his heart, she had lit a spark that was now threatening to consume him.
He couldn’t let that happening. Running a nervous hand through his hair, he steeled himself he made his way up the steps.
*********************
When Buffy stepped outside the view took her breath away. The pool deck and surrounding gardens had been transformed into a tropical paradise. Anya had talked her into a Hawaiian Luau theme. She suggested the party be in the evening and now Buffy understood why.
Statuesque Tiki torches lined the pool deck. Tropical plants and flowers surrounded the stage and dance floor that had been built beside the large lush gardens. Further into the grounds a stone fire pit smoldered.
Through the hustle and bustle of the hired staff, Buffy spotted Anya. She smiled when she noticed her grass skirt and coconut shell top. Squealing, Anya came running towards her.
“Oh my God, you look great!” Anya gushed. “A certain photographer wont be able to keep his eyes off you!”
Buffy had spent the whole previous day with Anya shopping for just the right bathing suit to wear to her party. She had finally decided on white Brazilian cut bikini. The top was unlike any she had ever seen. It had a special enhancer in it that not only made her boobs look a whole size bigger, but gave her unbelievable cleavage. She wore a sheer black wrap and strappy sandals. Buffy wore her hair up with a few soft curls surrounding her face.
“Sssshhh” Buffy giggled quickly looking around.
“Is Cordelia still here?”
“No, she left a while ago, claiming an allergy to the Tiki lamp oil” Anya rolled her eyes.
“Good” Buffy scowled.
“Oh my God! Where did you get that necklace?” Anya’s eyes widened.
Buffy grinned from ear to ear “Where do you think I got it?”
“Spike?” Anya asked in disbelief.
When Buffy nodded, Anya chuckled “Oh tonight is going to be fun.”
********************
As her guests started to arrive, Buffy kept watching for Spike to come up from the basement. Her stomach was in knots. There were probably about twenty people there already. Willow and Oz had come early so that the band could set up.
Buffy was thankful Cordelia wasn’t around. Willow still did not know that Spike was Cordelia’s husband Tonight was definitely not the night to explain to her best friend that she had been having an affair with a married man.
Sighing and looking around the pool deck, Buffy was struck at how much her life had changed since school had ended. The things that once seemed so important to her now seemed so trivial. The boys that she had once thought were so cool, now seemed so immature.
Buffy felt his presence before she even looked toward the door. When their eyes met a bolt of electricity shot through her body straight to her womb. Unlike all the other men who wore brightly colored Hawaiian style shirts, Spike was wearing a tight black tank top with worn blue jeans. His usual slicked back hair was replaced with a riot of soft curls. He was sex on legs.
A shiver went through her body at the intensity of his gaze. His piercing blue eyes raked hungrily over her body. Buffy felt herself faltering. She wanted nothing more than to forgo her plan and take him up on the silent offer his eyes were expressing.
As if on cue, Buffy noticed Angel step through the doors and around Spike. Breaking eye contact with him she quickly rushed toward her ex before Spike noticed his arrival.
“Angel I’m glad you made it.” Buffy beamed making sure she had Spike’s full attention.
“Buff, wow you look great!” Angel exclaimed scooping her up for a big hug.
The last thing Buffy wanted was for Angel to touch her, but as he spun her around she couldn’t help but notice the death glare on Spike’s face.
Putting her down, Angel looked around.
“This is where you have been staying all summer?”
“Yeah. Mom is out of the country, so I have been staying here.” Buffy shrugged.
Angel stepped toward her taking her hands “I have really missed you Buff. I have actually been looking forward to school starting again.” he confessed.
Buffy was suddenly very uncomfortable. She couldn’t believe he actually thought after breaking up with her like he did, she would ever take him back. He had humiliated her. Right at this moment, she would have loved to tell him off in front of the whole party. If her plan was going to work, however, she would need him to think he had a chance.
“Come on…let’s go dance.” She smiled pulling him right past Spike toward the dance floor.
********************
Spike could not believe she had invited her ex. Watching captain hair gel put his big meaty paws on Buffy made him want to beat the boy to a bloody pulp. He was so busy watching Buffy dance with the git he didn’t notice Anya and Xander approach him.
“Hey are you going to take any pictures or just stand around glaring all night?” Anya asked.
“I’ll do whatever I blood well please.” Spike barked back at her.
Anya held her hands up “Well fine, just try to get some photos of Buffy tonight.” she huffed walking away.
Spike watched Buffy dancing. Watching her sway to the beat, it was almost as if he were hypnotized by the rotation of her hips. She had no idea the signals her young, tight body was sending out. His cock sprang to attention.
It was soon apparent that he was not the only one responding to her seductive dancing. When Spike saw Angel pull her against his body, he immediately started for the dance floor.
“Whoa buddy, slow down.” Xander said grabbing Spike’s arm.
“If you want to keep that hand I suggest you let me go.” Spike growled.
Xander instantly removed his hand. “Listen Spike, I’m on your side, but you can’t punch him out. He is only seventeen.”
Xander’s words hit home and Spike turned to face him looking shocked.
Xander shrugged “Yeah I know about you and Buffy.”
“Bloody hell” Spike cursed running his hand through his blond curls. “How?”
“Anya…she guessed it a while ago.” Xander admitted.
Spike’s eye widened “Right, now I understand.” he chuckled shaking his head in disbelief.
********************
Everyone had a wonderful time at the party. The Dingoes played to a packed dance floor. The food was delicious and the dancers were perfect. All of Buffy’s friends hula danced and there was even a limbo contest. Everyone was having a wonderful time. Everyone except for Buffy.
As the hours dragged on, she was becoming more and more upset. She had danced and flirted with Angel all night. He has been glued to her side feeding her pineapple, filling her drink and finding any excuse to touch her.
Buffy had been patient and accepting of his affection hoping to provoke a response from Spike. Every time she thought he was going to approach them he just would start taking pictures.
He doesn’t even care she pouted. It was almost midnight and Spike hadn’t even spoken to her the entire party. Feeling the tears in her eyes, Buffy decided she needed to be alone and walked inside.
She had just walked in the doors when she was grabbed from behind. For a split second she thought it was Spike, but the body behind her was too bulky to be him. Buffy whirled around startled to find it was Angel.
“Where are you going?” Angel smiled.
“Oh I…just was going to freshen up a bit.” Buffy lied trying to back out of his embrace.
Angel tightened his hold on her “Why don’t you show me where your room is.” He whispered pulling her flush against him.
Buffy’s eyes widened when she realized he was fully aroused. Bringing her hands up between them, she pushed on his chest trying to free herself from his grip. He was too strong.
“Listen Angel I really just need to use the bathroom.”
Angel ignored her and began kissing her neck. He backed Buffy against the wall trapping her with his hulking form. Her heart started pounding, not from excitement. She had to think of a way to get away from him. This was not at all what she wanted.
Suddenly she felt Angel being forcefully yanked backwards. He went sprawling backwards onto the floor. Buffy looked up to see Spike.
“Party is over Peaches” Spike sneered his eyes never leaving Buffy.
“What the hell? It’s Buffy’s birthday. Don’t you think it is up to her when her party is over?” Angel spat.
Buffy could tell that he was angry and embarrassed, but she couldn’t bring herself to care. She couldn’t take her eyes off the man in front of her. The intensity of his gaze had her frozen in place.
He raised an eyebrow waiting for her response. As if to challenge her to defy his words. He looked angry and dangerous, but she the shiver that went through her body was not that of fear.
“Party’s over” She confirmed in a low, hoarse voice.
The sides of Spike’s lips twitched, but the smile did not reach his stormy blue eyes. Buffy was familiar with this dance. He was the voracious predator and she, his willing prey. Her breaths were coming in shallow pants as she felt the moisture pool between her legs. Her body was responding to with growing, animalistic need.
Buffy didn’t remember how they got to his room, but as soon as the door closed, she was shoved roughly against it. There was a sudden flurry of hands and mouths. She felt her hands pulled above her head as he nipped and bit at her neck, grinding his erection against her belly.
“How far would you have gone?” Spike mouthed against her neck, then biting down hard.
“Huh?” Buffy could barely speak much less understand what he was saying.
Bracing her arms with one hand Spike roughly tore off her bathing suit bottom and thrust two fingers deep inside her.
“Oh God” Buffy screamed, thumping her head back against the door.
“Would you have fucked him?” Spike asked adding a third finger.
Buffy’s eyes popped open “No! God don’t even say that.”
“Well it’s sure what looked like. His fucking hands were all over you.” Spike said as he continued pumping inside of her.
When his thumb started rubbing her swollen clit, all she could do was shake her head.
“No? Tell me Kitten! Tell me you wouldn’t fuck him.” Spike purred.
Buffy whimpered when he removed his fingers. He released her arm cupping his hands under her ass a lifted her against the door. Her legs wrapped instinctively around his slender hips as she immediately began fumbling with his zipper.
When his erection was freed he nudged it against her dripping slit.
“Please…please Spike” Buffy panted.
“Tell me Buffy!” He demanded slamming his cock inside of her.
“I wouldn’t have fucked him…never.” Buffy cried out.
“God baby… I missed this…so much.” He breathed in her ear.
He continued pumping into her with long powerful stokes. Buffy’s mind reeled. She knew this wasn’t the plan, but she has missed him so much.
“Just tell me Spike…tell me this is real.” Buffy whimpered.
Spike closed his eyes. It was all too real. He knew what she wanted to hear, but couldn’t find the words. He wanted nothing more than to savor the feeling of her surrounding him. To pretend it was the sex and not the woman that made him feel this…whole.
“Spike?” She breathed.
“Shh” He whispered dipping his head down to capture her lips.
Buffy felt the tears burning her eyes.
“Stop!” She croaked pushing on his chest with her hands.
Spike looked up at her furrowing his brow.
“Get off of me!” She squealed pushing him harder.
Spike carefully set her down and backed away letting his cock slip put of her.
“What’s wrong?” He asked suddenly concerned.
Buffy chuckled dryly “What’s wrong? I’m tired of playing these games! That is what’s wrong!”
Spike cocked his head to the side. “You want to talk about playing games kitten? Bringing your ex here just to rile me up?”
Buffy nodded “You’re right! No more games.” she said taking his hands.
“I love you Spike.” She said letting out a deep, shaky breath.
For a brief second his whole body hummed at her admission, but reality was quick to set in.
“No!” He rasped backing away from her tucking himself back in and zipping his jeans.
“No? What the hell does that mean?” Buffy asked walking towards him.
“It means…that isn’t what this is about.” He said avoiding her eyes.
“I know that it’s not how it started and I didn’t plan for it to be this way, but…”
Spike looked up at her standing naked in front of him. Her lips swollen from his kisses. Her eyes were pleading and full of unshed tears. He knew deep down there was only one was this could end. Giving her any hope would be wrong. He could never be what she needed, what she deserved. His heart ached longing to reach out and comfort her, but he knew what he had to do.
“But nothing. This…is all there is Buffy. When the summer is over so are we.”
“So what…we just say ‘hey, it‘s been fun’ and go our separate ways?” She asked her voice cracking.
“Basically…yeah” he answered coolly.
“Everything we shared…” she sobbed.
“We shared sex Buffy! Great sex, yeah, but just sex.”
“No I don’t believe you! Look me in the eyes and tell me you don’t love me!” She demanded.
Spike panicked unsure if he was going to be able to do this. The way she was looking at him, he was sure she could see right through him.
Throwing his hands up in the air he yelled “God Buffy grow up! This isn’t some fucking romantic chick flick, where we ride off into the sunset! Once you go back home to your friends, you’ll forget all about this.”
“No!” She screamed grabbing his arm “I won’t forget.” The tears were now streaming down her face.
“Tell me Spike! It is the only way I will believe you.”
He walked up to her, his face inched from hers and looked her in the eyes.
“I-Don’t-Love-You.”
Buffy collapsed on the floor crying. Spike turned and walked out the door.
******************
Buffy couldn’t breath, she was crying so hard. How could I have been so wrong? she sobbed. She had honestly thought he loved her. She thought he was just scared. Scared that admitting it would change their lives forever. But her life was already forever changed. She knew no matter what he said, that she would not just forget him. Not ever.
Grabbing a blanket off of the bed, Buffy wrapped herself tight and slowly walked up the stairs. The house was quiet. Anya and Xander must have broken up the party and headed home. She had just laid down on her bed when her cell phone rang.
“Hello” she whispered.
“Buffy? Honey I hope I didn’t wake you up. I just wanted to say happy birthday. How was your party sweetie?” Joyce asked excitedly.
“Mommy?” Buffy sobbed.
“Baby are you okay?” Joyce asked worriedly.
“Mommy…” Buffy cried feeling like a small child desperately needing the comfort of her mother.
*********************
Spike rolled over knocking the empty bottles off of the bed. His muscles screamed in protest with every movement. He notices dried blood smeared across the white pillowcase. Oh yeah the fight he reminded himself.
After leaving the mansion he has gone to Willy’s looking for two things. He wanted to get drunk and to try to release some of the anger burning inside of him. Of course starting a fight with four bikers when he was already falling down drunk wasn’t exactly what he had in mind. Thankfully Willy had managed to break up the fight and drove him to a hotel to sleep it off.
Spike didn’t want to sleep it off. He didn’t want the alcoholic fog to lift. Fishing around the bed he found a bottle that was still half full. Taking long pulls from the bottle he begged for the numbness to return. He could handle the physical pain from the beating, but the image of Buffy’s eyes as he tore her heart apart was too much to bear. Finally when the bottle was empty, he could feel the burning effects of the alcohol pull him back towards unconsciousness.
******************
He was running up the steps of the apartment. He was so excited not to have class. Opening the door he heard a giggle coming from the bedroom. Walking down the hallway the noises got louder. When he opened the door he saw Drusilla. She was naked, bouncing happily up and down on their neighbors cock.
“William it is just sex! Grow up! I-Don‘t-Love-You!” Drusilla giggled.
Spike woke up with a start. He was sweaty and panting. Those weren’t Drusilla’s words they were his. Nevertheless he remembered how he had felt that day. His world was never the same after that. His eyes widened in realization. He had just done that to Buffy. He had to make it right.
Jumping out of bed he scrambled for his clothing. Even is they could never be together he couldn’t let it end like that.
The drive to the mansion was a blur. A series of horns beeping a tires squealing before he finally pulled up straight through the grass, stopping at the front door.
Racing inside he heard voices in the kitchen.
“I can’t believe Buffy! What an ungrateful little bitch she is.” Cordelia spat.
“What are you talking about?” Spike demanded.
Jenny and Cordelia turned to face Spike theirs eyes widening in horror.
“Oh dear!” Jenny screamed running toward him.
“God Spike what the hell happened to you?” Cordelia asked.
Spike had forgotten all about his injuries, he had to know what they were saying about Buffy.
“Forget out me! I am fine! What were you talking about.” Spike insisted.
The two woman eyes him suspiciously then Jenny spoke.
“I guess Buffy is homesick.” Jenny informed him.
“What do you mean?” Spike asked as panic set in.
“Buffy is gone Spike. Joyce flew home and picked her up this morning.”
Sorry I know you all may want to smack Spike (or me) right about now, but bear with me it will all work out! I know some of you may have already read this on other sites since TSR has been off line, but leave leave me a review anyway to let me know you are still reading=)
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Author's Chapter Notes:
Hi Guys I'm glad the site is back up! As always thanks to everyone who has read and reviewed this story! Thanks to my beta Ashley who really helped me with this chapter!