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A/N I am in need of a new beta, if you guys know of someone, let me know at j.coder@mchsi.com . Thanks! Randie

Chapter Two: Wake Up Screaming

Dawn was on the floor—literally. She had collapsed the minute she realized that Spike was standing less than two feet from her. In the confusion, she was forgotten for only a moment, as all the people in the room were rushing around each other, trying to figure out how the dead hero was here.=

Then he saw her. “Dawn?”

Her usually pale face was almost gray, her eyes shut. “She fainted?” He rushed to her side, landing on his knees and pulling her to his chest. “Bit. Love?” He shook her a little, being careful not to damage her in any way. “Bugger!” He looked up at everyone, “What the bleeding hell is happening here?”

Angel recovered from his shock. “Spike. How are you here? You di—“ he was cut off with an elbow in the stomach from Willow.

“What do you mean, ‘Why am I here?’ I have no fucking clue, An-gel.” He stressed the last part. “All I remember was fire, and her screaming—Oh God! Where is she?” His head darted from side to side, looking through the throng for her. “Buffy?”

No one moved.

No one said a word.

“Buffy?” It was a whisper. A caress with his voice for a now dead lover. His heart was tearing apart from the inside, killing him.

“Where are you, love? I…I need.” He got off his knees, mindful of the girl in his arms. He took an unneeded breath, a sob escaping his throat. All of the memories from the Hellmouth and its closing filled his mind. “Oh God?! Slayer….” He closed his eyes, jaw tight, and he was mourning. “Love?”

Pulling Dawn to his face, he buried his face in her neck, and rocked her, more for his benefit than hers, surely. “Oh, Bit, I’m so sorry.” They stayed like that for a long time; he was crying-sobbing with grief, and his little girl lay there in his arms limp and warm.

~~~~~~~

The group watched in marvel as their champion grieved with the one person who could understand. Xander cried, clutching Willow’s arm, who was also crying. There really wasn’t a dry eye in that lobby. Everyone was feeling his pain, like when someone watched the saddest damn movie they had ever seen, and they were pulled into the drama by sheer force of the actors abilities. Giles was stoic, as was Angel, the only moisture coming from them was unnoticed by either man.

The two left them all and went into Angel’s office, quietly closing the door behind them. It was Angel who spoke first. “What the hell is going on?”

Giles took off his glasses and stared off at nothing. “She’s alone.” Putting the back of one hand to his eyes and the pulling it away in anguish, he looked heavenward. “She’s alone Angel.”

“I know.”

“It was safer, easier when we knew that he would-d-d,” he stammered. Throat raw with his own grief, it was very hard to finish. “-be there with her.” The last was quieter. Pulling a chair out from in front of him, he sat down with a thump, crossing his arms in front of him in a very-unlike-Giles pose.

“He loved her that much?” Inside Angel already knew the answer.

“With every fiber of his being. Unfortunately.”

“Did she…I mean, how did she…” he trailed off, leaving the question open.

With a sigh and a smile, he answered, “I believe that she loved him. Like an addiction almost. He was the one person that had never left her, God knows even I left her when she needed me, and that didn’t help anything.” A pause. “What do we do now?”

Angel shrugged, still shocked by his words. “Not sure. I can get people on where Buffy is, since Spike came back, she must be able to, too right?”

“I don’t know. Mystically, it might be a one person out kind of clause, but we can research, and find out.” His eyes were tired, so much older than he was at that moment. “Right now, though, I believe that we need to cancel some reservations, and borrow some rooms for the group.”

The vampire stood. “I’ll get on it. You should make sure everyone is okay.”

“Oh, Angel. Have you not seen it all for yourself? I don’t think anyone here will ever be okay. Not again.” And with that, he walked out to check on his charges.

~~~~~~

She was opening her eyes, aware only of some blonde hair in her face, the smell of ash, and the coolness of the body holding her. “Spike?”

He pulled away a little bit and smiled sourly, but the best he could at that moment. “Dawn.”

She pulled him to her again, eyes tightly shut and squeezed him with her arm. “Spike! Where’s Buffy, is she with you?”

He wished he could tell her yes, but there was the truth, and she deserved it. “No.” He whispered it into her hair.

She was crying. Silently.

“If I had known, Bit. If I had known, I would have never allowed her to come to me at that last second.” His breath was tickling her ear. “Do you understand?”

She nodded.

“I didn’t know.” And his tears were fresh, pain clogging his voice. “I just wanted—her. If I was going to die, I just wanted to see her face one more time.”

She stopped crying for a moment, and cracked a small smile. “Sometimes you’re a big girl, you know that?”

He grinned back at her. “Yeah, I do.”

“Please tell me we’re going to find her.” She played with his hair.

Spike thought for a minute. And considering his options, which were absolutely none other than finding Buffy, it wasn’t hard. He nodded and stared into her eyes. “She would kick my ass if I left her anywhere without us, Bit. We’re all she’s got.”

A true smile covered her lips as she thought about what he said. Soon, she was nodding too, “Yeah.”





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