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Author's Chapter Notes:
This hasn't been proofread yet, so I apologize for any mistakes.
Friday Night...

Spike sat at the bar, nursing his second drink. Work had been rough today and when all was said and done, all he'd wanted to do tonight was go out, get pissed and pass out. Unfortunately his usual haunt, Willie's, had been closed 2 days before by the local authorities.

So Spike was left with only one option: The Bronze. Of course, he could've stayed home to drink, but that course of action would only leave him feeling more depressed than was really healthy. But then, when had being healthy ever really concerned him? He worked too much, drank too much and smoked too much. Hell, the last time he'd cared about taking care of himself was...months ago. With her.

God, he hated this place. His mouth was set in a firm frown as he surveyed the room. Most of the patrons were 18 and under with the occasional college student thrown in for good measure. His observation only served to make him feel more pathetic. The Bronze almost had a wholesome feel, as long as you could overlook the gyrating bodies on the dance floor.

Just as he was about to down his drink and head out, a flash of golden curls caught his eye. Spike sat up straighter - desperate to catch another glimpse of that familiar shining mane in the sea of dancing bodies.

Then, the crowd parted and he had a completely unobstructed view of the object of his every desire.

Buffy.

Fate was a cruel bitch. It was her. Her back was to him, but he'd know the sway of those luscious hips anywhere. Spike watched, transfixed as she moved with the music, and slowly turned to face his direction. Her eyes were closed and she held her slender arms high above her head. Her long blonde hair hung loosely around her shoulders in whimsical curls. It had looked that way the day she left him.

God, she was a vision. The dress she wore was beige and lacy. It was almost classy, except for the strategically placed slit that allowed him a generous view of her sun kissed thigh. Unbidden, Spike's thoughts turned to a time when it had been not only his right, but his immense pleasure to touch and kiss his way up that golden skin. And her hair...God that hair. Bouncy and shiny and enveloping both of them in a soft, vanilla scented curtain as he nestled himself inside her scorching depths.

"Damn." An annoying voice rudely brought Spike back to reality and out of his X-rated thoughts. Reluctantly, he drew his gaze away from his gorgeous ex and settled it on the slimy looking bartender. "Fuckable. Am I right?" The bartender nodded in Buffy's direction, practically salivating at the sight she made.

Spike didn't answer him. Instead he turned back to watch Buffy, sipping thoughtfully on his drink.

"My break's comin' up. Think I got a shot with her?"

Spike was about to tell him not to bother. He knew Buffy - she'd chew this guy up and spit him out without so much as a second thought. Then he figured it had been a while since he'd seen Buffy in action. It would be fun to watch her shoot this loser down.

"Sure, uh..."

"Warren," the 'tender supplied.

"Warren. Right. You go right ahead. Let me know how it works out for you."

"I'll do that," Warren grinned as he topped off a mug of beer and handed it across the bar to a customer. He eagerly grabbed a towel from a shelf below the counter and wiped his hands before running them through his greasy hair. Then, giving Spike a toothy smile, he headed towards the dance floor.

Spike had all but forgotten him a few seconds later once his eyes settled on Buffy's dancing form again. He frowned slightly as he watched Warren slid up behind her, placing his hands on her hips and pulling her close against him. He was trying to be smooth, Spike could tell, but it wasn't working for him. Warren looked terribly unsure of himself as he clumsily grabbed Buffy's hips and tried to sway his body with hers. Buffy was going to eat him alive.

As soon as she'd felt hands on her, Buffy stopped moving. They guy behind her kept moving against her - she could feel him. And it annoyed her. She had come here tonight to unwind. She'd been having a great time too. Should've figured some loser would approach her sooner or later.

Spike watched as the blonde beauty whirled to face the unsuspecting bartender. He obviously couldn't hear what was being said over the music, but by the dark look on Warren's face, Buffy'd just handed his ass to him. Then she turned on her heel and haughtily left the dance floor, her friend Faith - whom Spike had only just noticed - in tow.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"Geez, B. What's the big? I was just startin' to have a little fun," Faith complained as she and Buffy joined their other friends at a table near one of the quieter corners of the club.

"I just needed a break," Buffy answered, grabbing a bottle of water off the table and taking a sip. "That guy from the bar was gettin' all grabby. He spoiled my fun." She pouted.

"Ya should try not to look so darn hot Buffy," her friend Willow smiled across the table.

"Yea, B. You know guys can barely keep their dicks in their pants. When it comes to their hands---"

"Um, hello," the only male at the table finally interjected. "Guy sitting right here. And my hands and other ... extremities are right where they should be."

Buffy smiled and reached over to touch his arm. "That's because you're one of the good ones, Xand."

Xander smiled and patted the small hand resting on his arm. "It's good to see you havin' fun again. We've missed seein' you smile lately."

"I know. But I really am feeling better now guys. Things are...looking up."

"We're glad Buffy. We've been worried ya know?"

"Yea. I know," she gave them a small smile. "And on that note - I need a potty break. Will, Faith - you guys wanna come with?"

"Na, I'm good." Willow absentmindedly answered, her gazed fixed fully on the guitarist of the Bronze's regular live band.

"Me too. Think I'm gonna head back out. See if I can find someone a little grabby." Faith grinned as she sashayed back out onto the dance floor.

"Hello again!" Xander's voice called out desperately to Faith's back. "I said I'm sitting right there!"

Buffy shook her head and laughed as she headed to the bathroom.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Spike watched her sit at the corner table. Willow was there, and Xander. He smiled when he caught sight of them. They had been his friends too, not too long ago. He missed them.

Then Buffy was pouting and all thought was lost. That full, soft, oh-so-kissable piece of flesh sticking out in the most erotic way...And then she smiled. She was so beautiful when she did that the whole room seemed to light up.

Spike watched as she talked with the others for only a moment before getting up and heading to the back of the club. He watched as she disappeared down the dimly lit hallway where the bathrooms were. With her finally out of sight, the spell she had on him seemed to be momentarily broken. He had nearly convinced himself to get up and go home when he caught sight of Warren again - he was headed down the hallway after Buffy.

Suddenly, the idea that Buffy would be alone in the dark with him made Warren seem like a much bigger threat than he had before. Buffy was tough, but she was so small. If Warren wanted something from her, he wouldn't have much trouble taking it. With that in mind, Spike stood up and made his way across the room a grim look on his face.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

By the time Spike made it across the club and down the hall, he was desperate to see Buffy again and make sure she was alright. Over the muted sounds of the band playing, he could hear her voice.

"Get lost creep."

His little spitfire. Spike smiled. His face hardened again when he heard Warren's voice.

"Come on, baby. Daddy knows how you like it."

Buffy made a disgusted snorting noise, "Oh my god! Are you for real?"

"Unfortunately, pet. He is." Spike announced his presence.

Warren whirled around, looking decidedly uneasy. Then seeing it was Spike, he relaxed. "He man, come to join in the fun?"

Ignoring Warren's question, Spike's gaze found Buffy's questioning one. "Hello, luv. How've you been?"

She was obviously shocked to see him, "What are you---?"

He smiled at her, "Come on, Buffy. Let's go," He held his hand out. Buffy moved toward him, her hand reaching for his.

Before she could reach him, Warren's hand shot out and grabbed her wrist. Buffy gasped and Spike saw red.

"We're not finished here yet." Warren ground out, glaring at Spike as he held tight to Buffy's arm.

Lashing out, Spike suddenly had a hold of Warren's forearm. He squeezed until Warren released his hold on Buffy then jerked it upward and behind his back. Using his knee, Spike knocked Warren's legs out from under him. In an instant, Warren's face was pressed to the floor. He struggled and Spike twisted his arm harder.

"Ow! Okay, man! Okay! Ease off! You're gonna break my fuckin' arm!"

"It's nothin' better'n you deserve you son of a bitch."

"Spike..." Buffy's hand was on his shoulder, her voice was soft. "Let him up. He works here...I don't want you to get into any trouble."

He looked up at her and the small, grateful smile she offered him and sighed. He hauled Warren to his feet roughly and shoved him hard against the wall. "Don't let me see you near her again, mate." He didn't have to offer a verbal threat - it was clear in his eyes. He released Warren roughly, who practically fled the hallway without so much as a glance back.

"Thank you."

Spike felt himself relax instantly. Her voice always had that affect on him. "No problem, luv. You okay?"

"I'm fine. He just didn't get the message. I'd already told him to leave me alone once before."

"On the dance floor, I know."

"You do? You were watching me?"

"No," he answered quickly. Then more quietly, "Yes."

She smiled up at him, tilting her head slightly. "So how've you been handsome?"

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

After a few minutes of only slightly uncomfortable small talk, Buffy heard the band launch into their rendition of an older song that she vaguely recognized.

"I like this song." Spike murmured, when he recognized the tune.

"It's a classic," Buffy smiled at him. She was quiet a moment, then she reached for his hand. "Dance with me?"

"Course, luv." He whispered and allowed her to lead him to the dance floor.

When they reached the floor, Spike pulled her to him. He held her close, his arms securely around her and his forehead resting against hers.

The irony of the situation was not lost on him. The song they danced to was devastatingly perfect given their situation and it took all his willpower not to break down. Instead he forced himself to hold Buffy closer and savor this time with her. He didn't have much of it left, after all.

Buffy was grateful for the dim lighting in the club. Tears blurred her vision as she stared at Spike's chest. She couldn't look up, couldn't meet his eyes. If he guessed the truth - that she still loved him - she knew she'd die. He was done with her. They were over and she had moved on. She was happy. Or at least working on being happy. But if that was truly the case, then why had dancing with Riley never felt this right? That train of thought would lead nowhere good and Buffy was grateful when he tightened his hold on her; being closer to him kept the thoughts away. When he held her like this, there was only Spike.

The song was winding down much too quickly for Spike's taste. He knew he'd have to head home after this dance. He wouldn't be able to handle looking her in the eyes again tonight. Not after this - when he felt like all his emotions were pouring into her while they swayed gently together.

As the song ended, Buffy moved to pull away. She hadn't been able to hold all her tears in and had every intention of running to the bathroom and staying there until she was sure Spike was gone.

Spike felt her pull away, but would have none of it. He had spent their entire dance preparing himself to let her go but now that the moment was upon him, he couldn't do it. He held her tighter and slowly brought one hand up to her face. Gently, he tilted her face up and caught sight of her tears.

"Buffy," he whispered, just before his lips descended to meet hers. Instead of her mouth, his lips meet her soft cheek. He pulled back. She had turned her face away - it felt like she had punched him. "Buffy..."

"Let me go," she pulled away from him and he let her. Without even a glance at him, Buffy ran.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

A soft cry escaped her lips as Buffy stumbled through the backdoor and into the alley behind the Bronze. She needed air. She needed space. She needed...

"What was that, Buffy?"

She gasped as she whirled on him, clearly not expecting Spike to follow.

Taking a moment to steady her breath, she managed to look him in the eye momentarily before adverting her gaze. "What was what?"

"Oh, it's like that, is it? You're gonna stand there and pretend that there's nothin' here?"

"There's plenty here, Spike." She spat, glaring at him. "But you didn't seem to care about that when you left."

"When I left?! You left me woman! Not the other way around!"

"You were gone long before I left, William." It was whispered, and laced with hurt.

Spike swallowed and ran a hand through his hair. "Buffy..."

She stared up at him with huge, wet eyes that seemed to beg him. For what, he didn't know. Peace? The truth? An apology? He settled on the truth.

"I miss you."

She visibly softened towards him, "I miss you, too."

"There are days...there are days when all I can think about is you..." he swallowed. "God, I'm such a ponce."

Buffy laughed at him, though there were still tears glistening in her eyes. "Yea, you kinda are."

"Way to kick a bloke when he's down, sweetheart," he returned with a grin. They were both quiet for a long moment. Buffy's quiet admission broke the semi-silence of the alleyway.

"I'm not over you." Spike barely heard her. "I try to be, but I'm not."

"Seems only fair, I s'pose. Since I can barely function without you."

"You look like you're doin' alright," Buffy tried to lighten the mood.

"It's dark back here, luv. Guarantee if you saw me in the harsh light of day you'd feel differently."

"Doubt it." She smiled at him again and suddenly Spike couldn't bear the distance between them. Encouraged when she didn't shy away from his nearness, Spike moved closer still, until they were nearly touching.

"Been losin' my mind without you," he gently ran a hand over her long tresses, watching as they shined in the dim light of the alley.

"Will ---" he silenced her with a kiss. It was meant to be quick and sweet. It was neither, for as soon as their lips met, Buffy's arms were around his neck bringing him closer to her. Spike groaned as his arms went around her small waist, molding her tiny body to his. When he was sure she wouldn't pull away from him, Spike released her waist to let one of his hands trail upward to tangle in her hair, tilting her face so he could deepen the kiss.

His other hand made it's journey in the opposite direction, taking up residence on the roundness of her firm little bottom. Spike shifted against her and pressed her lower half snugly against his jean clad erection. He immediately recognized his mistake. Buffy stiffened, then pushed against him desperate for distance. He let her go, reluctantly and watched as she tried to gain control of her breathing.

"Oh god, oh god, oh god..." She was trembling, her back to him.

"Sweetheart---"

"No!" She whirled on him, holding a hand out between them. "You don't get to do that anymore. I'm getting married Spike! Doesn't that mean anything to you?!"

He glared at her. "Didn't mean much to you 'til about 10 seconds ago." Again, he realized his mistake too late. In one fluid motion she was in front of him and his cheek stung painfully from the slap she had dealt him.

Buffy gasped as soon as her palm met his face, immediately regretting her actions. "I'm sorry!" She looked away, shaking her head slightly. "I...I need to go."

She headed for the door that would take her back inside the club. Her hand was turning the knob when his quiet voice stopped her.

"I wish I didn't need you, Buffy. I wish this was...easier."

"Me too."

"You belong with me. You know that."

"We tried that already. It didn't work."

"We could try again."

He could tell she was struggling to keep her composure and took pity on her. Slowly, he came up behind her and wrapped an arm around her waist and buried his face in her hair. Buffy's body relaxed against him with a sigh, but her mind was still in turmoil.

"I'm with Riley now," she whispered. "He loves me, Spike. He wants to marry me. He's---"

"Convenient. And safe. You always know the score with him. You call all the shots." She felt him exhale harshly and shake his head. "You need to be challenged, shaken up. You need to be worshipped..."

"Spike, please."

"Leave him."

She shook her head. "I can't."

"You can. Come back to me. I need you...You need me. Your place is beside me."

A small sob escaped her as she released the doorknob and turned in his arms. She clung to him desperately as he kissed her hair and gently rubbed her back.

Buffy pulled away after a moment and gazed up at him. His heart ached as he took in her tears. Slowly, his hands came up to cup her face. He wiped her tears away with his thumbs. "This face," he whispered, pressing a kiss to her forehead. "This face haunts me. Drives me outta my head..."

Buffy shuddered at the intensity in his gaze and his words.

Spike swallowed, gathering his courage for one more attempt, "Come back to me."

Her wet eyes stared into his for several long moments, silent. He gave her a sad smile before releasing her and turning away so she wouldn't see any more of his pain.

One look at his slumped, defeated shoulders finished breaking her already fragile heart. And she'd had enough. It was time to start repairing the damage.

"Okay," she forced herself not to whisper.

Slowly, Spike turned to face her, his head tilted in confusion. "What?"

She gave him a shaky smile. "I said okay...Not right now. I mean, I need a few days to---" her eyes fell to her engagement ring. "I need a few days to set some things right. But...I want us, William. I need us."

Spike was on her in an instant, kissing her so gently, she nearly wept. And then she did weep when she felt his own tears on her face. She held him to her, reveling in his touch for a few moments before she pulled away.

"I'm gonna go," she said quietly. "I'm kinda beat and uh... I'm gonna need my rest for tomorrow."

Spike didn't need to ask her what tomorrow was. She was leaving her fiancé. For him. The man who'd promised to marry her, the man who could give her everything she wanted: a home, a family, security. She was giving that up for him.

"I'll call you in a few days so we can talk, okay? Then we'll figure this out together."

"Right." He smiled as she pressed one more sweet kiss to his lips before she turned and went back inside the club.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I hope this came out okay. I feel really awful right now so I didn't really proof it or anything. If y'all see any mistakes, let me know.
Also, the song that Buffy and Spike dance to: I deliberately didn't put actual lyrics in the chapter. The dance wasn't about the song. It was about what the song made them feel. However, the song they dance to was "Please Forgive Me" by Bryan Adams.





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