Chapter 6
‘No, no, no, no, no! This is not happening…but he seemed so sincere. NO! He’s a soulless demon. No soul equals no feelings. But Spike couldn’t lie to save himself, and that seemed sooo real. Okay, need to get a grip here.’ As Buffy’s continued inner argument unfolded, she moved in small circles around the room.
‘Let’s analyse this logically. I was doing well in psychology, even if the teacher was an insane-o Frankenstein’s monster making Nazi, I can do this. He said he wants to be a better man. Could the chip make him want that, or is it just because he knows he can’t be…well…what he was? Or does he really want to be a better man? Which is totally of the good if it’s true. He did pick me over the crazy ho, so that means she wanted to take him back and he could have gone anywhere and maybe found a doctor to get the chip out, but he stayed in Sunnydale, knowing that that meant keeping the chip or being dusted, even when I told him I wanted him gone and had him disinvited and everything. He stayed, Ooh, and then there was that whole beating he took from Glory, and he still didn’t tell about Dawnie. I told him I wouldn’t forget it, and I did sorta trust him when we were trying to escape. Even though he’d taken that whole beating and torture from the crazy hell ho, he didn’t hesitate to keep helping. I trusted him enough to leave Dawnie and Mom with him. He did stop that knight’s sword from turning me into Buffy-kebab. Nobody could say that him staying and helping to fight and look after Dawnie when I was in heaven was him just trying to get in to my…ah…good books, ‘cause…well…dead. And he was the only one I could talk to when my wonderful heaven stealing friends…Okay, not going there…
'So maybe he really is trying to be a better man and the chip just kinda made it easier to change…and really I did say I wouldn’t forget that whole Glory deal, and he knows not to mention any spell induced kissage, so maybe…wait a minute…he picked me over the crazy ho. He picked me over the crazy ho? Spike picked Buffy over Drusilla?? Spike totally worshiped Drusilla, but he picked me??? He stayed and he picked me over the love of his unlife??? Love?!? Spike loved Drusilla. Spike actually loved Drusilla…but, the books all say that’s not possible, demons can’t love. Angel said demons can’t love…and really, what with the effect of the soul and all, if demons could love then Angelus would have sooo totally loved me and he sooo totally didn’t…so we have like proof or something that demons can’t love…so how is it that Spike loved Dru…ooh…ooh, I know, maybe Spike’s like the exception to the rule and if I was like a friend to him I could totally help him be…well…one of the good guys…I could do that…and he’d be a really great help, what with the super powers and the fighting skills and the staying and all.’
Buffy smiled, but as she reached the decision to help him, she heard his voice replay in her mind, ‘I don’t want to go back’ and she froze, her mind reeling. “But, I need him,” she whispered to herself.
Buffy made a snap decision. This time there would be no leaving of Buffy, it was time to show Spike that he belonged and just exactly who it was that he belonged to. He belonged to the Summers women and the Summers women took care of their own. He seemed to be hurting just like she was; maybe helping him would help her feel better too. Squaring her shoulders, Buffy took a deep breath and left the sanctuary of her room.
“I feel like I’ve already failed her twice; I don’t want to fail her again, Giles.”
Buffy stopped as she heard Spike speak and wondered what he was talking about.
“Failed her how, Spike?” Giles gently asked Buffy’s question.
“I didn’t do a good enough job protecting Dawn; she got cut and Buffy had to sacrifice herself because of it. If I hadn’t failed, Buffy wouldn’t have died…then I failed her again by not stopping the Scoobies from bringing her back.”
“That’s crap, Spike,” Buffy interrupted him as she moved to sit next to him, her gentle tone at odds with her words. “You didn’t even know about the spell, how could you have stopped it? And you didn’t fail me on the tower, either. You tried your best, Spike; that’s the most any of us can do. You fell off a ten story tower and survived to look after my sister. You kept your promise to me and you kept me sane when I came back. You kept another promise to me, Spike. You kept my secret. You were the one that saved me from burning from the inside out with the dancing demon. You saved me, Spike. You never failed me, but I’m beginning to think that I've failed you.”
Spike’s look of shocked awe was enough to make Buffy almost cringe with guilt, but his words brought her world back into focus. “You under a spell again, Slayer?”
“Sheesh, Spike.” Buffy rolled her eyes. “It’s not like I have to be under a spell to be nice to you.”
“Wouldn’t know, pet,” Spike snarked back with a smirk.
Half-heartedly punching his bicep, Buffy grinned. “Shut up, Spike.”
“Make me, Slayer,” Spike teased.
Buffy’s speculative look caused the vampire much trepidation. “Okay, I claim you, Spike of Aurelius, in the name of the Summers women. You are ours.”
The answering “yours,” was out of his mouth before the poleaxed vampire could think. As his fish impression continued, Buffy smiled smugly at him. Lifting one eyebrow as she looked at him, she sardonically commented, “Well! I guess that worked.”
“Buffy, do you realise what you’ve done?” Giles asked mildly.
“Yep,” she answered, popping her ‘p’. “I claimed Spike…and even though it wasn’t a blood claim, I got his word and Spike always keeps his promise to a lady.”
“Actually dear, it’s a little more complicated than that. You just instigated the beginning of the mating ritual and had his demon cut his family ties to the Aurelian clan.”
“I what with the who?”
"I only bloody asked for a crumb, slayer," the vampire whispered in awe.
"I didn’t mean to," she said sheepishly.
"You said that when you made the bear, too." Spike pointed out, dryly.
“Oh, that sooo wasn’t my fault!” Buffy replied indignantly.
“Didn’t mean to? Are you saying you don’t wish to claim Spike, Buffy?” Giles asked sharply, concerned that the emotional vampire would be unnecessarily hurt.
“Oh, no, he’s mine Giles, but I sure as hell didn’t know about the matey thing.”
*******
“What the hell..?” Angel abruptly stopped walking. He’d just felt the family connection snap somewhere. Somewhere close. Extending his senses cautiously through the family bond, as he didn’t want anyone to know he was there, Angel felt for his Childer and through them his Grandchilder. There! There was the hole…Spike? Drusilla’s ire hit him like a ton of bricks. His childe was furious and for some reason it was all directed at him. ‘Well, it wasn’t my fault…I didn’t dust the little attention whore…maybe Buffy…no she was asleep when I stopped watching her.' Angel let his attention drift for a few minutes, images of his beautiful Buffy flitted through his mind, her blond tresses fanned over the pure white cotton pillowcase, the innocence of her face in repose. He shook his head as if to clear it of the images. Time to get back to the manner at hand. ‘What in the hell do I do now? Inconsiderate bastard, getting himself dusted before I had a chance to find out what he was planning. Oh well, at least he killed the Anointed One, so I can tell Buffy that problem has been handled. Best not to mention Spike though; it will only complicate matters. I’ll have to take the credit.' Angel’s deeply put upon sigh echoed through the night.
*******
Young Buffy sat up in bed, with a start. “Weird dream,” she mumbled as flashes of cerulean blue eyes and white blond hair played across her mind’s eye. Deeply chiselled cheekbones, full lips, and washboard abs completed the picture. Smiling to herself, she snuggled back under the covers with an almost inaudible ‘yum’.
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