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Author's Chapter Notes:
Mention of Fool for Love.
Chapter 15

“How much do you think my mom heard?”

“Can’t say for certain, but her timing was spot-on.”

“I told you we had to be quiet. You didn’t listen.”

“I wasn’t the one making all the noise.”

“That’s not true.” With one hand still embedded in Spike’s hair, Buffy wrapped her free arm snuggly around his neck. She let out a sigh and allowed her cheek fall against his cool skin. “I wasn’t noisy,” she grumbled a minute later. “She probably didn’t hear that much. She’s just teasing me. Everyone gets such a kick out of picking on me nowadays. Dawn’s relentless. Mom’s just jumping on the bandwagon. It wasn’t like this before, you know. It’s your fault.”

“Of course. Why not? Is there anyone else you’d even consider holding responsible? Anyone besides me?”

Buffy shook her head, and as Spike chuckled, she tugged the bleached blond strands on the back of his head. “My relationship with Riley was never a big deal,” she explained. “It wasn’t the topic of conversation. No one ever mocked me or went out of their way to tease me because of it.”

“That’s probably because your big hulking ex was about as interesting as a box of rocks. Let’s measure up the corn-fed, mad cow-ridden Cub Scout to the likes of yours truly--.”

“Let’s not. Spike, you’re a total creep. I can’t talk to you about Riley. I won’t.”

“Alright,” he said, lowering his voice to a seductive murmur. “Don’t talk to me, don’t include me; do it yourself. You think back to how you acted around your Riley and compare it to how you are with me, to how you were with me just now.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“And that’s your problem. Your words, your actions—they aren’t meeting up where I’m concerned. That’s why they’re teasing you. You might be as stubborn as hell, but your family’s picking up on all of it. And you can’t blame the girls for finding some amusement in your behavior, Buffy. You say you can’t stand me, that I annoy you, that you hate me, but here we are.”

“None of that’s my fault.”

“Oh yes, you’re completely innocent.” He snorted softly into her hair. “So what’s the story behind that pout then? What about that blush you’re trying so desperately to hide? Burying your pretty pink face into my neck won’t cut it. You’ve gone red all over, baby. You’re always warm, but now, holding you is like cradling a ball of fire.” As he spoke against her ear, his hand wandered. His long fingers slipped between her parted legs; they sought out the fullest part of her thigh and squeezed. “You’re glowing again, Buffy.”

“Spike…no,” she croaked, unable to think or speak clearly faced with the intimacy of his impromptu massage. “I’m not… I don’t… Spike, you’re dumb. Shut up.”

“My God, you are so bloody sweet. If you’d only release my hair from your clutches, I’d gobble you right up. You wouldn’t hear a peep from me for the rest of the night.”

“Yeah right. As if that’s even--.” She cut herself off to let out a throaty groan. He had slipped through the folds of her shorts, making contact with her damp underwear. He teased her with a collection of maddening squeezes to her inner thigh and feathery light strokes from his thumb until she whimpered, “I hate you. You’re trying to kill me.”

“Frustrating, isn’t it? Wanting, but not receiving in full? Take me for example. I’ve got you exactly where I’ve wanted you—where I’ve dreamed of having you for months now—and you won’t look at me. I’ve got you nestled in my lap, and I can’t even reach to kiss you properly. You and your bloody Slayer-death grip. Can’t move my head, can’t see, I can touch but…pet, it’s a fucking travesty.”

A funny feeling bubbled up from her heart; it caused her chest to tighten. Licking her lips, she backed away from the safety of the crook of his shoulder. She glanced at him and flushed again. A new wave of warmth flooded through her body down to her toes.

“Happy now?” she asked, releasing his hair. She smoothed it down by running her fingers through it.

“Ecstatic, but I didn’t mean for you to blush again. There’s no need for that.”

“Tell that to my face. I never embarrass easily. Not usually. I hate it, and it’s--.”

“All my fault?”

“You could’ve just asked like a normal person. But no, you say you want to ‘gobble’ me up. That’d be gross even if you weren’t a vampire.”

“Right, so poor word choice justifies yanking my hair out by the roots. Good to know.”

Buffy rolled her eyes. She opened her mouth, but before she could get a word out, Spike was kissing her soundly. Taken by surprise, she let out a pleased moan. The crotch of her underwear was soon pushed aside and she moaned again. When the pad of his thumb slipped against her swollen clit, she cried into his mouth. His middle finger slid in and out of her less than a dozen times, and she lost it.

“Spike!”

“Hush. Remember, kitten, someone might overhear your demure yet somehow still-deafening screams of pleasure, and we don’t want mummy or little sis spoiling our fun.”

“You’re a creep,” she said, pushing her face into his neck once again, dotting the area with frantic kisses. Greedily, she stroked his beautifully sculpted abs and strong arms. “You had to prove me wrong. You’re a smartass and so freaking smug that I could just…”

“Squeal again?”

She shook her head, even as she let out another whimper. She clung to him, holding on tightly as his fingers coaxed her body into a lingering orgasm. “You’re still a jerk,” she gasped as her heart pounded.

“Just when I thought I couldn’t get anymore head over bloody heels…” Spike snickered happily. “Buffy, you’re perfection. Haven’t seen anything like it, the way you respond to me. Haven’t even gotten inside you yet and it’s remarkable. Your Riley had to work for it, didn’t he? From my post out front—even by your dorm, I never heard you make such a delightful racket.”

“From your—what? Out where?”

Spike froze, but his silence spoke volumes. “I can explain.”

“Don’t bother.” She didn’t try to disguise the disappointment in her voice. “You spied on me.”

“I…did. But I just listened. Mostly.”

“I think I’m going to be sick,” she said, lifting off his body. As she yanked on the hem of her shorts, Spike grabbed her forearms and she flinched. She saw his middle finger glisten. She felt it, wet against her skin.

“Baby, please. We were getting somewhere. We were making brilliant progress. You want me--.”

“I want a normal boyfriend, not a stalker! I want—gah! You make everything so difficult! You’re obsessed, Spike! You watched me from your ‘post’? What the hell does that even mean?”

“It’s just a series of trees!” he answered hastily, refusing to let go as she squirmed. He kept her hovering above him and straddling his legs. “I squat under the sodding tree in your yard and the one outside your dorm—had another spot near the frat until Finn left, alright? I think, I smoke, I look after you--.”

“When you aren’t stealing from me so you can have authentic props for your trashy sex games? And I love the present tense. When did you watch me last?”

“Does it matter? It won’t happen again.”

“It matters. Answer the question.”

“I’m out there nightly if I can help it.”

“I don’t even…nightly?”

“You’ve got to stake me now, don’t you? I’ve given you no choice. A few days out of the month might’ve been forgivable, but every night? It’s too much. I come across as a total wanker.”

“That, and a perv. A big giant perv with no self-control who doesn’t give a damn about me or my privacy.”

He nodded, loosening the grip on her forearms. His fingers slid down and barely circled around her wrists. “I don’t know why I seem so hell-bent on mucking this up. My mouth—Buffy, we should just muzzle it. Lock it up and toss away the key. I haven’t even told you about Doc and I’m already about to lose you.”

“Spike…” She felt as if the wind had been knocked out of her. She had never experienced so many conflicting emotions. She found his stalker-like behavior disgusting, but his distress was bothering her. It was bothering her so much that she wanted to reassure him somehow, even as a part of her screamed that he didn’t deserve it. And, underneath it all, her stubborn attraction to him was buzzing in high gear, making all her feelings a great deal more complicated.

“Hey, don’t be so dramatic,” she continued. “You’ll probably offend me. You’ll make me mad—I have no doubts about that—but… Spike, you won’t ‘lose’ me.”

“Because I never had you in the first place. I know that’s what you’re about to say, but hear me out. This is more than an obsession. You’ve got to believe that. My feelings are heartfelt, genuine--.”

“You just have your own unique and slightly demented way of showing them?”

“Well, that’s true. I haven’t had to worry about adhering to the good and proper for a very long time—hell, even back in my human-days, I was miserable at it.”

“Like when you wrote love poems for that girl who barely knew your name in the eighteen-hundred-whatevers?”

She asked the question with a slight smile and a simple plan in mind. She’d lightly tease him and give him a hard time about the importance of privacy until he learned the error of his ways. Then they’d be fine. They’d move on. Buffy didn’t know what they’d move on toward, but she secretly just wanted to get back on top of him. She wanted him to kiss her and touch her. She had thought his lips were freakishly talented, but his fingers left her panting for more.

However as soon as she got the question out, she knew she’d made a mistake. She watched his expression change. They were slight changes: a set jaw, a puckered brow and a slant to his eyes, but they all meant that she’d accidentally hit a soft spot.

“Yeah, that’s exactly it,” he answered with a roll of his eyes. “When I wrote my God-awful love poems for a chit who didn’t give a fig about me. She didn’t care, but that didn’t stop her from ripping my heart to pieces. If you recall it’s quite the sob story. I’d give you a refresher but, it’s only been a week or so since our sit down at the Bronze and I doubt you could afford the price I’d charge for the recap.”

“Spike, I didn’t mean to…”

“Don’t worry about it. So you took some awkward details from my past and threw them in my face. Was a good line, wasn’t it? A fantastic put down: you’re beneath me. I had it coming that night anyway. I agreed to flaunt my glory days. I took your money. I disclosed too much. I was being a dick, I pushed too hard, so you used what I told you to your advantage. Once again, everything circles back to my big mouth. Funny, isn’t it?”

“I don’t think it’s funny at all. You were being honest with me, and I—I was mad at the whole world and took it out on you. Riley had just left, that random vampire had nearly killed me with my own stake, my mom had just… You don’t need to hear excuses. I shouldn’t have said that you were beneath me. I’m sorry.”

Spike just looked at her, and she stared back. They stayed silent until Spike cleared his throat. “You know,” he began, giving her wrists a gentle squeeze, “I wasn’t fishing for an apology.”

“You got one anyway.”

“I should apologize too, shouldn’t I? You’d like that. But what if I won’t mean it? Blame the lacking soul, but I don’t regret watching you. I do regret witnessing Captain Cardboard bust one off, but--.”

“Spike!”

She poked him in the stomach and the next moments were a frenzied blur. She continued to poke at him, and they weren’t exactly love taps, but she made a point not to hurt him. And he laughed as he dodged her pointy finger until she surprised him by climbing back into his lap.

“Oh, Buffy.” He said her name with a moan and deep inhale. Then he was giving her mooneyes again. A hand was running along her thigh. Another was under her sweatshirt, against her side, stroking her bare skin. “Thank God, pet. I thought--.”

“Is there anything else I need to know about? For this thing between us to have even the tiniest chance of working out, you can’t—no more stealing, go easy on the spying, and no—if I see you within three feet of Harmony or any other blonde Buffy-wannabe, I’ll kill you. I mean it.”

“Got it. Got it. But why would I bother with any of that when I’ve got the real deal? Seriously, everything else is and was just a sorry substitute for you.”

She dug her teeth into her bottom lip, forcing herself not to smile. “Is there anything else?”

“I had a shrine. That’s where I had your stuff before Harm’s bonfire. Not everything on it was stolen. Had some found objects too. Never been above diving through a dumpster.”

“Is that your way of saying you went through my trash? Spike, that’s--.” He broke her off with a deep kiss that left her breathless and her brain fuzzy. It was especially difficult to concentrate since he’d waited until then to brush against her hard nipples for the first time. “Isn’t there something else? Spike, um…what did you say before? Why did you think you’d lose me?”

“Don’t bother yourself with that now. How about we move this to the bed?”

“You said something about…Doc? Who’s that?”

“Please, can’t it wait? And if sound’ll be such an issue, let’s go. You can scream your head off at my place.”

“We can’t,” she said, closing her eyes as Spike pulled her sweatshirt over her head. “Your place is wrecked.”

“The bed’s alright. So’s most of the recliner, about a third of the couch and a good ten-by-ten inch square on the makeshift countertop. The walls are still standing and there’s always the bloody floor. Got a new rug just yesterday we could break in.”

She blinked. “You want to have sex on all those things?”

“Don’t you?” he asked gently before licking her right nipple and taking it into his mouth. He snickered once she dug her fingers into his hair. “You’re blushing again, aren’t you, baby?”

“I’m not.”

“You are, and I love it.” He licked a trial from her breast to her neck and kissed the rest of the way up to her lips. “I love you. Might not show it in the best or most socially acceptable ways, but I’ll work on it. You’ll tell me how to right my wrongs, won’t you, Buffy? I’ll do anything you say.” He brought her against him, pushing their naked upper bodies together. And as he kissed her, Buffy snaked between them to pull down the zipper of his jeans.

“We can’t leave because of the girls, am I right?”

“I was wondering if you’d figure that out on your own.”

“And you’ll be quiet?”

“I doubt it. Apparently, you aren’t the only one in need of a muzzle. And I figure, since I’m destined to get both called out and ridiculed anyway… You can’t get anymore carpe diem than this.”

As she spoke, she stroked him then she took him into her hand and explored his erection from base to tip. She marveled at how hard he was. And it was all for her, because of her. Because he loved her. “God, Spike, when I said you had no self-control… I had no idea…”

“You didn’t?”

“Okay, maybe I had some idea,” she mumbled while kissing his chest. “I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t aware of your bulgy pants, but a girl can still be a little overwhelmed, right?”

“Buffy.”

“Everything about you is overwhelming. It’s bugged me for a long time, but now? It’s not so bad.”

“Buffy—oh fuck. Kitten, hold on,” he said through clenched teeth, just as Buffy thought she’d found a good rhythm. “Hold on, you’ve got to stop.”

“Why? Did I--.”

“Just listen.”

She paused and heard feet against the stairs. They were heading toward Buffy’s room. And at a quick pace. Whispering a curse, she leapt away from the blanket chest. “It’s Dawn.”

“I know, but, pet--.”

“Mom will wait in the hallway. She’ll even count to five before entering the room after a knock. But Dawn? She’s going to bust through my door in about two seconds. I need to get rid of her.”

“Buffy!” her sister yelled. “Telephone!”

“Who is it?!” Buffy yelled back as she pulled her sweatshirt over her head.

“Giles!” Dawn answered.

“Tell him to wait a minute!”

“Should I hide in the closet? Scurry under the bed?”

From the strain in his voice, Spike didn’t seem ready or prepared to do any of those things. But the offer alone made Buffy’s lower lip jut out sympathetically.

“You just sit there,” she said. “I’ll take the call in the hall and while I’m out there, especially if I’m gone too long, or, if you, um, get too uncomfortable--.”

“Get to the point, pet.”

“Just do, you know, whatever you need to do.”

“Whatever I need to do?”

“Oh, don’t make me say it. I don’t want you internally combusting, okay?” She ran toward the clothes hamper, dug out her laciest pair of dirty underwear and tossed them at him. “That should do the trick, right? Isn’t that how sickos like you get off?”

“Usually,” Spike responded with a muted, but amused chuckle. “Especially as of late.”

“’Kay, um, on that note, I gotta…” She gestured toward the door and slipped through it. She took one step into the hallway and collided with Dawn, who had had her ear pressed against Buffy’s door.

“I didn’t hear anything!” her sister gasped, instantly defensive as Buffy slammed the door shut behind her.

“And why do I not believe you?”

“I—I told Giles you were busy, but I didn’t tell him that you were…” With her hand over the receiver, Dawn shook the phone toward Buffy’s bedroom. “I mean, yeesh, I thought you’d be done sexing him up by now. You’ve been in there forever. I can’t believe you made him climb through your window.”

“I was keeping him away from you.”

“Really? You’re kidding.”

“Dawn, I didn’t hear the phone ring.”

“Oh, that’s because I called Giles. He asked for someone to call with an update on mom once we got home, and since you were too busy, I did it, and you’re welcome. Hey, since you’re out here, can I see Spike now? Buffy, I need to talk to him. It’s important.”

“No,” Buffy said, blocking the doorknob with her body before Dawn could reach for it. “Just give me the phone and no one will get hurt.”

“Is he—oh my God, he’s naked in there? Is he—oh my God. Did you really—oh my God!” Dawn tried to jump for the doorknob again, but Buffy grabbed her.

“What is your problem?!” she demanded, giving the girl a shake. “Keep your raging teenage hormones away from my vampire! He’s too old for you and he’s—he’s only interested in me so leave him alone!”

Buffy expected Dawn to cower, but instead she laughed out loud. “Oh, wow. I bet he’s crapping himself right now. For you to do a three-sixty since dinner—damn, he must be good.”

As Dawn cackled, Buffy ignored her. With wide eyes, she stared ahead and silently panicked.

I said that he was mine, she thought. Out loud. Dawn heard. He heard it too.

“Buffy. Hey, Buff, it’s okay,” Dawn said, patting her on the shoulder. “I wasn’t serious. As much I wouldn’t mind seeing him naked--.” Buffy gave her a harsh glare, and Dawn laughed again. “I know he’s into you and only you. We talked about it before, Buffy. He’s all yours. Clearly you guys are meant to be, because you’re almost as lame as your new boyfriend.”

“Dawn.” She sighed and held out her hand. “Give me the phone. You should be downstairs studying for your math test tomorrow. Three hundred and sixty degrees is a complete circle. One-eighty is half way. That’s when you turn and head in the opposite direction.”

“Oh, thanks. That’s good to know. Now I’ll get it right when I tell mom about this in the morning.”

Buffy cringed. She squeezed the phone in her fist.

“Mom said he couldn’t sleep in your room. Remember that. I don’t need to hear you guys going at it all night. It’ll give me nightmares or something. I’ll fail my test because your irresponsible boinking.”

Buffy closed her eyes and counted to ten. She made sure her sister was out of sight before reentering her room. “Hi, Giles,” she said, sighing heavily. With her back against the door, she sank down and sat crossed-legged on the carpet. “You still there? Sorry about the delay and I’m currently praying to God you didn’t hear any of that. What’s up? How’s the all-night study group going? Have you learned anything?”

She only half-listened as Giles reported that they were no closer to finding out what Glory was after hours of non-stop research. She was too busy gathering the courage to look toward her bed. And, once her eyes darted in that direction, she found that Spike wasn’t where she’d left him. He was walking around, still topless, but with his jeans fastened. He was opening drawers, thumbing through her closet and touching just about anything he could get his hands on.

Buffy was making a mental note to strip search him later for any stolen belongings when Giles cleared his throat for a third time. “I’m sorry. So, we’re getting nowhere. Glory’s still a big question mark. We have no idea what kind of demon she is. I guess I’ll be rejoining the study group tomorrow. I might even bring an extra set of eyes with me.”

Spike turned at that. He pointed to his chest and wrinkled his nose when she nodded. “But I know what she is. She isn’t a demon. Glory’s a bloody god.”

“What? What did you say? Sorry, Giles. Hold please.”

“She’s a god,” Spike repeated. “I thought you knew. She probably isn’t in any of those moldy old books of your Watcher’s ‘cause she predates the written word.”

“How…?” Buffy shook her head. She took her hand off the cell phone’s receiver and told Giles what she’d learned. “I’ll call you if I find out more. Apparently I can do my own kind of research tonight from home. I’ve got a source. I’ll squeeze him for information and get back to you.”

“Not until tomorrow,” Spike whispered. “It’ll take all night to get me talking and it’ll require a hell of a lot of bloody squeezing.”

“Spike,” she mouthed back. “This is serious.”

“I know it is. She’s after you, wants you dead. That’s nothing new, but she’s after something. Something specific. A key. The lizard from the bar, the bloke with the tongue? He said she’s going to come here for the key if I don’t bring it to him. Wouldn’t say when, but tell your Watcher you’re in good hands. Spike isn’t gonna let anything happen to you.”

“Does she know where I live?” Buffy demanded, speaking in full voice to Spike and ignoring Giles. “Is she coming to my house?”

“I don’t know. That’s what I understood, but you know how we evil-types boast. Doc worships that Glory bird, he’s going to oversell what she knows and what she can do, it’s a given. Slayer, I think it’d be best if we just--.”

She cut him off with a wave of her hand. “Giles, can you come over? Bring weapons. Spike and I are going out.”
***





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