Buffy was nervous. No, that was a huge understatement, she was way beyond nervous by now. At the same time, she was more excited than she could remember ever being before. Glancing at her watch, she realized that Spike would arrive any minute to pick her up for their date. She was going on a date, with Spike! A part of her still had a hard time taking in the fact that he had actually asked her out. Well, technically she had been the one to ask him first. She could hardly believe that, either. Now she almost blushed when she recalled how persistent, not to mention pushy, she had been; first suggesting they would go out for lunch and then insisting they should do it again. The thing was, the way she had been acting around Spike was so not like her, at all.
She had always been kind of shy around guys before, and if anyone had told her two weeks ago that the day would come when she would ask a guy out, she would have laughed in their face. Buffy’s history of dating wasn’t exactly the best; for some reason she'd always seemed to fall for the wrong type of men. Her first crush had been a good looking guy called Parker Abrams. When he first approached her in school, her experience with guys had been a big fat zero, and now she cringed at how naïve she had been back then. Parker had seemed very nice and acted like he was really interested in her, and Buffy had been thrilled at the attention he kept showing her.
One of the biggest mistakes she had ever made, and something a part of her would always regret, was agreeing to having sex with him. He’d kept insisting and she had been weak, afraid that if she’d say no, he would leave her and move on to someone who would give him what she wouldn’t. That alone should have been enough to make her see that he wasn’t the one for her. But a part of her had also wanted to do it, she was curious and she definitely didn’t want to be the last virgin on earth. Truth to be told, the first time hadn’t been terrible, she could’ve done a lot worse. Parker had been patient and gentle, and even though she didn’t exactly get to experience the miracle of the orgasm she had read so much about – which she was half convinced was really just a myth, anyway – it hadn’t hurt too much and she had actually felt different afterwords, like she had finally become a real woman.
Unfortunately, the next morning she woke up alone. Parker had left in the middle of the night without a word and after that, he simply ignored her when they ran into each other in school. Two days later, she saw him leaving the school building holding hands with a tall brunette with huge boobs and way too much makeup. Apparently, she hadn’t been good enough for him, although she had never managed to figure out what she’d done wrong. And she had been way too embarrassed to walk up to Parker and confront him. He had been her first love, and she had been stupid enough to think that he had actually felt the same way. She could still remember how humiliated she had felt when she realized that he had only wanted her for one thing.
Then there was Angel. He was tall, dark and mysterious, and Buffy had fallen for him the minute she first saw him. Even though he never showed the slightest sign of interest in her, she had followed him around for years, like a puppy, never stopped hoping that one day he would notice her. Then one night, almost a year after they had graduated, he had finally approached her at The Bronze. For a brief moment, when she had been dancing in his arms, she had felt like the luckiest girl in the world. And then he had brought her outside and tried to rape her.
And Spike had showed up, had entered her life like a knight in shining armor and saved her from Angel before he had actually managed to go through with it. At first she had been afraid of him, had started to think that maybe all men were the same, but Spike had proved her wrong. Buffy would’ve thought that after what happened, she would never be able to trust another man again. But she only had to look Spike in the eyes to know that he was different, that he wouldn’t hurt her. Her falling for Spike so deep, not to mention so soon, had certainly been unexpected and a part of her was almost frightened by how strong her feelings for him had already become. After all, she didn’t really know him, he was still practically a stranger. But for some reason, she couldn’t care less. She had never felt so safe with anyone before. Now, if only she could get him to feel the same way around her…
Buffy had already come to the conclusion that something had happened in his past that he didn’t want her to know about, what she couldn’t figure out was what, and why he didn’t want to tell her. Sure, they hadn’t known each other that long yet and she had a pretty good idea that whatever he was hiding, he never talked about it, with anyone. From what she had seen so far, he didn’t seem to have any friends at all, and she suddenly couldn’t help but wonder if his violent behavior and hostile manners was simply a way to keep other people away from him. It didn’t work with her though, and she wondered if she might be the first person he had actually bothered to be nice to since he had moved here. Could that mean that whatever it was she was feeling when she was around him, he felt it too?
His bad temper and sudden mood swings had not passed her unnoticed though, and she had a feeling that if he would ever even consider telling her anything about whatever inner demons he was struggling with, she would have to be very patient. Getting him to trust her would most likely be the hardest thing she had ever done, but she wasn’t about to give up. She could be very persistent when there was something she really wanted, and that was probably a good thing. Because right now she wanted to get to know Spike, and if she had any say in the matter, she would. No matter how long it might take.
TBC
[Reviews - 1696]
-
Table of Contents [Report This]
Chapter or Story |
Chapter or Story | 
Chapter or Story
Has been viewed 5407 times
- Text Size +
-
Table of Contents [Report This]
Chapter or Story |
Chapter or Story | Chapter or Story - Text Size +