Spike had backed up against the wall, eyes squeezed shut and breathing hard. Suddenly he looked up, as if he had sensed her presence, blinking in confusion. His face was pale and he seemed more than a little dazed. Letting out a sob of relief, Buffy flew through the door and threw herself in his arms. “Oh thank God, I thought...” Feeling him tense up, she immediately pulled back a little. That was when she noticed Ethan on the floor at the other side of the room, lying with his face down in a small puddle of blood. She let out a gasp. “Is he...?”
His eyes slowly following hers, Spike cocked his head to the side as he stared at the fallen man for a moment. Then he glanced down at his hands. They were shaking slightly, and covered with dried blood. More blood was trickling down his left arm, coming from a seemingly shallow cut just above his wrist. Buffy stared at the blood with tear-filled eyes. “You’re hurt.”
He didn’t answer. Instead he just kept staring at her with a blank expression on his face. Suddenly he looked uncertain, like he still wasn’t sure if she was really there. “Buffy?” he finally whispered, hoarsely. “You...” Then he stopped, noticing the blood in her hair. He reached out a trembling hand towards her, but then quickly pulled back, as if he was suddenly afraid to touch her.
“Buffy!” Xander chose that moment to enter the room, his eyes widening at the sight in front of him. “Holy crap,” he gasped, staring first at Ethan, then at Buffy and Spike. Before he got the chance to say anything else, two armed police officers appeared behind him in the doorway. Xander stepped aside as one of them lowered his weapon and quickly went over to Ethan, kneeling beside him on the floor and checking for a pulse. Then he glanced over his shoulder, shaking his head in the negative.
“He’s dead,” Spike unnecessarily stated, taking a step away from Buffy. “I killed him.”
The other policeman lowered his weapon as well, watching Spike closely for a moment. “And you are?”
Spike opened his mouth to respond, but Buffy beat him to it, jumping in front of her boyfriend and glaring at the policeman as if she expected him to immediately pull out the handcuffs. “It wasn’t his fault!” She pointed at Ethan, more tears welling up in her eyes. “That man is a monster, if you only knew what he’s done...”
The policeman – looking to be in his early thirties – raised a hand to stop her ramblings. “It’s all right, miss. Just calm down.” He paused for a moment before turning to his partner; “I’ll take care of this. You go call the station and let them know that one man is dead. Tell them we have the situation under control and there’s no need for back-up.” Nodding in understanding, his partner quickly got to his feet and left the room.
Xander cleared his throat, a little nervously. “I’ll go call Willow.” He looked at Buffy. “Let her know you’re okay. Bet she’s been worried sick.” Then he hurried out of the room as well.
“Okay...” The policeman hesitated for a moment before he went on; “I’m Officer Charles Gunn. Does any of you need medical care? Are you injured?”
Spike immediately glanced at Buffy, swallowing hard. Reaching for his hand, she squeezed it softly. “I’m fine.” She inhaled shakily, struggling to keep her voice steady. “Are you?” He nodded quickly, not meeting her eyes.
“Right.” Gunn suddenly looked a little uncomfortable. “I’m sorry, but I’m going to have to ask you both to come with me to the police station.” Seeing the alarmed look on Buffy’s face and the way she tightened her grip on Spike’s hand, he quickly made a decision and turned to Spike; “Um, you might wanna get cleaned up first, wash the blood off. We’ll wait here.” Spike hesitated for a moment, then nodded and headed for the bathroom.
Waiting until Spike had left the room, Gunn then turned to Buffy, a serious expression on his face. “I understand your concern, miss. But your boyfriend is not under arrest or anything. We’re just gonna need to ask some questions.”
“Oh, okay.” Suddenly Buffy felt like her head was spinning, not to mention the fact that she was terrified, half convinced that if she and Spike would go to the police station, it was just a matter of time before they would lock him up and throw away the key. The incredible relief she had felt for a brief moment when realizing that Ethan was no longer a threat had quickly subsided for fear. After all, a man was dead, and – evil or not – surely there would be consequences. “What’s gonna happen now?” she whispered, not really wanting to hear the answer but still feeling the need to ask.
Obviously seeing her despair and taking pity on her, Gunn let out a sigh. “What’s your name, miss?”
“Buffy. Buffy Summers.” She sniffled and wiped at her eyes before adding; “Officer.”
He gave her an assuring smile. “Just call me Gunn.” Then he paused for a moment. “Listen, Buffy, this is off the record, but if it’s the idea of a potential murder trial you’re so afraid of, I wouldn’t worry about it.” Buffy opened her mouth but he wasn’t finished. “I may be young and handsome, but I like to think I’ve been an officer long enough to be able to tell the difference between an act of self defense and cold blooded murder.”
She stared at him for a moment, not daring to get her hopes up. “How can you...?”
Gunn chuckled a little. “It’s called intuition.”
As soon as he was in the bathroom, Spike closed the door behind him and turned on the water. Then he started scrubbing his hands, suddenly desperate to get the blood off. The water soon became burning hot, but he didn’t even feel it. He closed his eyes, for some reason not wanting to look at himself in the mirror. Suddenly he felt a wave of nausea coming over him and he dropped to his knees, barely managing to lean over the toilet before emptying his stomach completely.
For a couple of minutes, he just sat there, dry heaving and gasping for air. Then he pulled back, resting his head against the wall and wiped his tear-stained face. He was relieved that he had remembered to lock the door, not wanting Buffy to come in and see him in that state. In fact, he wasn’t sure he would ever be able to face her again. Clearly, Buffy was safe now, although he still wasn't sure how. But if it hadn't been for him, she would never have gotten hurt in the first place.
And Ethan was dead. The man who had hurt him and abused him for as long as he could remember was finally gone, really gone, and would never be able to hurt him again. It was over. As the realization hit him, Spike waited for the relief to well up inside him, but it didn’t happen. He had thought that Ethan’s death would change everything, that he would finally be free, once and for all. That it would magically make him whole. But all he felt was a complete emptiness.
TBC