Chapter 28

She was at The Bronze. She had been transported back in time to the dance club, before it had transformed into The Light. A female rock band was onstage. The lyrics were about being alone and hating it. Buffy sat at a secluded table, watching the crowd.

A waitress came by, setting down a diet coke. Buffy thanked her, taking a sip of the drink, and leaning back in her seat. She scanned the people for a familiar face. She really wanted to find one of her friends to hang out with.

There was a tap on her shoulder. She turned to link eyes with Spike. His were no longer cold and dark, like the last time she encountered him, but back to warm blue. He smiled, outstretching an arm.

“Dance, luv?”

She took his hand without speaking, letting him draw her into the moving crowd. The song ended, beginning a softer, slower one. She rested her head on his chest, savoring his presence. They swayed to the music in silence for a bit.

As the song ended, Buffy glanced up. “I missed this,” she whispered.

Spike stroked her hair. “I wish we could have more,” he said.

“Huh?” she asked, confused. More what?

He swept his arm, gesturing around him. Their surroundings had changed to a dessert. It was night and the air was cool.

“All I can give you is death,” she heard Spike say.

Her eyes widened and shook her head. “No.”

A fire burst up in front of the couple. Buffy clung to Spike’s hand. In the flames, the first slayer could be seen.

“Love ... give ... forgive. Risk the pain. It is your nature. Love will bring you to your gift,” the ghostly voice of the guide rasped.

Buffy stepped backward, still grasping Spike’s hand. “No, death is not my gift!” she shouted.

The conflagration was extinguished. Buffy reached out and hugged Spike to her. She buried her face in his shirt. Death was not her gift. Death was not her gift. It was a mantra, repeating over and over in her head.

“You’re gonna have to kill me,” Spike told her.

Buffy abruptly pulled away. “NO!” she protested. “I can’t.”

He looked up at the sky. “I can’t find the light, Buffy. If I can’t find it, then you’ll have to kill me.”

Tears blurred her vision. “I can’t,” she said again.

“Help me. I can’t find the light. You’re light. Help light my way.”

From out of nowhere came a burst of sunlight. Buffy dodged to knock Spike to safety. She was met with air, falling to her knees. He had vanished.

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Buffy shot up in bed, gasping. The clock on the nightstand read 2:07 am. She rolled off the mattress and got to her feet. Her toes met cold carpet. Then she crept out into the hall.

Trying to be quiet, she went into the kitchen. She groped in the dark for the light switch, and got a glass down from the cupboard. She filled it with cold water from the sink. She drank, greedily. The liquid passing down her throat was refreshing. She struggled to block out visions from her dream that wanted to surface.

“Buffy?”

Buffy jumped. She spun around to face Dawn.
“Dawn, what are you doing up? Did I wake you?”

“No,” her sister replied. “I can’t sleep.”

“Neither can I.”

Dawn came further into the room. She grabbed the metal kettle on the burner. “Hot chocolate? Mom always fixed it, saying it was comfort drink. I think we could both use it.”

“Sure,” Buffy answered. She hoisted herself up on a stool. She watched as Dawn heated up the milk. It had been forever since she had drank anything besides the microwave packets.

“Do we have marshmallows?” Dawn asked, searching in the lazy Susan.

“Yeah, in the pantry. The small ones,” Buffy said softly.

Dawn glanced over in understanding.

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Later that day, Buffy came out of the training room. She sat down at the round table. Dawn and she were the only occupants there at the moment.

Suddenly Willow came rushing into the store. “I found out what happened!” she announced. She waved a piece of paper around in the air, flauntingly.

“Huh?” Buffy said.

“I did that spell I told you about. It’s a knowledge gaining spell. Well, I did it for Spike.” She laid the printed piece of paper in front of Buffy. “The Ankh of Gaia.”

Buffy examined the paper. It displayed an image of an Egyptian cross with writing engraved on its surface. Below was a description. She scanned over it, catching the gist: talisman for evil, takes away humanity, one’s will taken away, controlled by hell. Basically, Spike was stripped of any altruism he possessed, and was being controlled by darkness. Didn’t sound good.
Raising her head, the slayer inquired, “Where did you get this, Will?”

“Oh, this website called Talismans and Trinkets. I looked it up after I did the spell.” Willow sounded triumphant.

Dawn came over, hovering next to Buffy to get a peek at the paper. “Now we’re getting somewhere.”

“Any idea on how to reverse the ankh’s will on Spike?” the slayer questioned.

Willow shook her head sadly. “Not yet. But, I’m gonna keep looking. Don’t worry, Buffy, we won’t give up.”

Buffy nodded. She stood up from her chair. “Okay. Do you think you could stay here and research with Dawnie while I patrol?”

With a smile, Willow replied too cheerfully,” Sure, Buffy.”

Remaining solemn, Buffy grabbed a freshly sharpened stake, and headed out the door.

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Karen was relieved. She was finally in Sunnydale. Her heart fluttered and hope filled her aura. This might actually work. The world might be saved, and the erroneous watchers, who she used to call colleagues, stopped. That is, if she could find the slayer to warn her. The only trouble was that she had no idea where to find her. She had already tried the girl’s apartment, where she found no one home. Fredrick had spoke of Angela’s (or Buffy’s) whereabouts in his journal. He only mentioned her apartment and his home. His house appeared abandoned.

So, she was walking the town aimlessly. Maybe she should try the cemeteries. That was the slayer’s common battle ground after all. The woman headed off in the direction of where she suspected to find a graveyard.

She must have good instincts because she soon came upon Shadyside. She had just entered when something lunged at her from the shadows. Karen reached into her coat. Her fingers wrapped around a piece of wood. A watcher without a stake at all times was a fool.

The vampire had on a long, flowing leather coat on. He smirked at Karen, his golden eyes holding amusement. “Hello, sweetheart,” he greeted.

With a hand, Karen brought her stake up. She faced the vampire, ready for a showdown. She fought to collect herself. Truth was she wasn’t much of a fighter. She had been through watcher basic training, but she was only a researcher. She collected data in an office, and hadn’t ever been called on a mission.

For a second the vampire actually seemed take aback at her weapon, but recovered quickly. “Ooo, a stake, I’m scared. Know how to use that thing, pet?”

“I’ve got an idea,” she retorted, taking a skirmishing stance.

“I’m a master, luv, so you don’t have much of a chance. But I’ll commend you for your bravery. I’d be running now if I were you, though.”

Karen didn’t falter at his words. She waited for him to attack.

|} - - -> <- - - {|

Buffy’s mind was preoccupied. She had dusted three vamps, mechanically. They had been stupid fledglings. Easy, no-brainers.

Suddenly she heard some commotion nearby. Going into action-mode, she sprinted in its direction. She stopped dead in her tracks when she came upon the scene.

She recognized Spike immediately. His blond hair and duster were unmistakable. But that wasn’t what told her it was him. She would know him even if he dyed his hair and switched to orange clad. She could feel him. He hit something dormant inside her chest that only came alive when he was near.

She blinked, forcing her muscles to work. Her brain began to work again and she processed what was going on. He was feeding on a girl, draining her dry.

The slayer knocked him away from his prey. The female dropped to the ground, inert. He snarled, blood dripping from his chin. Ewww. She punched him in the jaw.

“Slayer,” he growled.

Normally she’d come back with a witty remark, but she couldn’t. This was Spike. Not the Spike she loved, but still Spike nonetheless. Her face was blank, mouth kept closed, and just moved. She blocked, ducked, dodged, kicked, and punched. They weren’t dancing. They were in combat. It wasn’t exciting or thrilling, and filled her with a deep melancholy.

Buffy pulled out a stake. She brought it up, preparing for its use.

“Gonna stake me, slayer? That it?” Spike moved back and forth in front of her. He looked as if he were trying to urge her on.

Buffy stood frozen. Her instinct told her to plunge the wood into his chest. Even her mind told her to go through with it. Her heart, however, was quivering and begging her not to take action.

The stake slipped from her grasp. Spike lunged, grabbing her shoulders. He pulled her flush to him. And even when he tilted her head, exposing her white neck, she didn’t regret her decision. At least she wouldn’t have to live without him.

His fangs sunk into her flesh with a sting of pain. She hissed at the sensation. She didn’t struggle, surrendering freely. She could feel the blood rushing from her veins into his throat.

“I love you,” she whispered, closing her eyes.

At that moment Buffy felt that she had finally discovered what it meant to love someone. It didn’t matter what happened to yourself as long as the other person was okay.

All of a sudden, the strong hands holding her in place gave away. The teeth were removed. It happened so fast that her legs gave out. She ended up on the cold grass, stunned. It took her a moment to focus and develop mobility again. She felt light-headed, but not ready to pass out.

Slowly, she turned her head to see what had happened. She was in shock to see a middle-aged man standing there. He held a cross out, holding Spike back.

“Giles?” Her voice was dry and scratchy.

He offered her a hand, which she accepted. She got to her feet, finding her strength return.

Giles studied her carefully. “Buffy?“ he inquired, not sure if he believed it was her.

She smiled. “Yeah, that’s me. I know I look a little diff.”

Concern marred her ex-watcher’s face. “Are you alright, Buffy?”

She nodded. “Yeah.”

“Are you sure? Can you stand?”

She let go of his hand to show him that her legs could indeed support her. “I can stand.”

Giles kept the metal cross out in front of him. “I would suggest you keep back, Spike,” he advised the vampire.

The man was offered a growl as his reply. Spike glared at Buffy. Then his mood suddenly changed. He let out a manic laugh. He pointed at them. “This is awfully funny to see you again. And with that, a cross. Don’t you watchers stake vampires anymore?”

“I can assure you, Spike, that I am armed at the moment.”

Spike smirked. “Scared to use it then?”

“Not at all,” Giles answered. “I have my reasons for not harming you, Spike. But if you continue to carry on so I may disregard them.”

Spike’s jaw clenched. After a brief hesitation, he gazed at the slayer. “I’ll get back with you, luv.” Then he turned, walking briskly away.
Buffy let out a long breath. She let her eyes fall on Giles. “Giles, I’m so glad to see you,” she told him. She threw her arms around his form.

He hugged her back, a little stiffly. Then he pulled back. “Buffy, I am happy to see you as well. But, we must see to the woman.”

Buffy’s eyes widened. She spun to look at the fallen woman. She felt ashamed. She had forgotten the poor victim Spike had been feeding upon. She rushed over, kneeling at the female’s side. The grass was stained with blood from the neck wound. A shiver ran down Buffy’s back. She raised a hand to touch her own neck. She felt the puncture markings. They had already began to scab.

The woman moaned at Buffy’s touch. Her eyes fluttered.

“We’ll get you to the hospital,” Buffy informed.

The woman grasped her arm, surprisingly stronger than expected. “NO! There isn’t time. I have to tell. . . tell you something.”

Giles came over. He gasped in horror. “Karen? Karen Kensington?”

Buffy glanced up at Giles. “You know her?”

“Why, yes, I do. She works for the council.”

The woman gave them a small smile. “Not anymore.”

“Excuse me, what was that?”

“The council was blown up.”

“Good lord!”

“Yeah, the bloody bastards.” Karen winced in pain.

“We have to take you to the hospital,” Buffy insisted.

Karen shook her head with difficulty. “Not . . . time.”
“You said that already,” Buffy said a little too harshly.

“Need to tell you,” Karen muttered.

“Tell me what?”

“The watchers . . .”

“I thought the council was blown up?” Buffy asked, dubiously.

“There are still a handful left. They’re after you. The slayer.”

Buffy sighed. Great, more enemies. Like she didn’t have enough to deal with as it was.

“Why? What have I done to piss them off this time?” Buffy asked.

“End . . . Battle . . . Light.” The words were faint.

“Karen?”

Karen went limp. Buffy bowed her head, grief sweeping over her. She should have dealt with the woman sooner.

A gentle hand was placed on her shoulder. She lifted her head to Giles. “We should have taken her to the hospital,” she stated matter of factly.

“It wouldn’t have made any difference. He took too much blood.”

Sobs rose up and Buffy found herself letting go. Giles took her in his arms, giving comfort.

“I don’t know what to do, Giles. I don’t know what to do,” she cried. “I’m the slayer. . . I’m supposed to know.”
“No one expects you to deal alone, Buffy. I will help. We will help.”

She nodded, her tears still falling but not as blindly.

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So, that ended up being longer than I anticipated. Good for you, though.

 
 




 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 


 
 


 
 


 
 
 





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