“There was a new girl at school today,” Buffy said, throwing a glance at the vampire out of the corner of an eye.
He smiled a little. “Yeah?” he said, “New best friend?”
“No... but I think I like her. I think I really like her.” She looked down at the ground, burying her hands in the pockets of her jacket.
The people in school hadn’t exactly been avoiding her since she came back. Before him she’d already been classed as “Buffy the Freak”, after that incident with Cordelia at the Bronze. The look in the girl’s eyes when she’d pushed her up against the wall, stake raised... Buffy felt a grin tickle the corners of her mouth, but it melted away just as quickly. When she’d returned to school she had just wanted to be left alone, Xander and Willow being the only exceptions. She couldn’t stand the pity she saw in everyone’s eyes.
“Deep thoughts, love?”
Buffy jumped a little.
“Nah,” she mumbled, “I was just thinking about... nothing.”
“Huh. Nothing you say.” Suddenly Spike’s eyes sparkled. “Wanna do something to take your mind off ‘nothing’?” He winked at her.
Buffy just stared. There was no way he was saying what she thought he was saying, or were her thoughts totally running away? And how come she had been around him so long and no one –
“Hello?! You. Me. Sparring?” The vampire arched an eyebrow.
Shrugging and then giving a small nod, she tried to play it cool. Spike’s smirk told her she failed dismally and she felt a blush creep up her cheeks. The smirk widened and she could almost see the comment ready on his lips. Before it could find voice she threw the first punch. It had been a good hit and a small sprinkle of blood trickled down the vampire’s face
“Okay,” she said.
He raised his eyes to hers slowly, almost lazily wiping the blood from his face. “Right. That settles it,” he said, “No playing this time.”
Next second Buffy was on the ground. Blinking, she was met by a pair of sparkling blue eyes. The blue seemed darker than usual and she blinked again. Suddenly she noticed the iron grip he’d locked her wrists in.
“This time, Slayer, this is a real fight.” He growled and for a moment she could swear she saw his bumpies emerging.
“Yeah?” she said, grinning, “I think you’re all talk.”
Her heart was pumping so fast it felt like it was going to burst through her chest, but it was pure adrenaline that had it racing. There was no fear. Last night Spike had had his fangs in her neck and she was still alive. She had no reason to feel fear.
She bucked beneath him, trying and failing in getting him off her. Laughter in the blue eyes and then the grip around her wrists eased a little. Immediately she knew he was doing it on purpose, he probably didn’t want this to be over before it started, or maybe he just wanted to give her a more of a fair chance. Whatever the reason was, she really didn’t give a damn. Easily wrenching her hands free she threw him off her. Rolling to her side, she sprang to her feet just in time to see him rise as well.
Watching him so completely focused on her, joy of the fight in his eyes, she wondered how long it would take before she could beat him. How long it would take for her to be ready to fight him. Spike was so good; she remembered the ease with which he’d taken her down with last time. Would it take years for her to be as strong as he? After all, he’d killed two Slayers before, that had to mean he wasn’t the average century-old vamp.
Right now she didn’t have time to dwell upon it, the object of her thoughts was coming at her again. She barely managed to parry his left hook, and half a second later his right fist sent her flying. Her head hit something, hard, and it swam with dizziness. Resting her hand against whatever she’d hit, it was all she could do to stay on her feet. Blinking desperately, she tried to gain focus.
“A vamp could kill you now, you know.” Spike’s voice was right behind her and two white hands gripped her shoulders and spun her around. “No one else but –“
She head butted him and he stumbled backwards. Her sight was still a little blurry as she hauled up her stake, but it was clearing by the second. She saw Spike’s eyes zeroing in on the piece of wood, and then he grinned. Buffy grinned back.
There was no doubt in his mind that she absolutely loved this. She was bloody gorgeous – stake raised, a few loose strands of blonde locks framing her face, and eyes glittering as a smile played on her lips. Her breasts were heaving and the sound of her pounding heart was music to his ears. He could feel himself grow hard.
Since when did he think she was gorgeous? Spike stopped dead in his tracks and received a solid punch in the face. Right. Not the time to think about that. He saw her aim for him again and caught her fist in mid air, twirling her around and locking her arm behind her back. His eyes were drawn to the bite mark on her neck. The wound had almost disappeared and he wasn’t sure if it would even scar; the punctures had been neat and with her Slayer healing they would probably be gone soon. He felt a sting of disappointment.
It was forgotten when she elbowed him with her free arm. It didn’t hurt that much, but it was enough to make him loose his grip and for her to pull free. She spun around and the next moment she punched him in the nose.
“Bloody hell!” he shouted, holding a hand to his face.
Him cursing only made her grin return. Another blow backed him up against a tree. She raised the stake, her gaze focused on his chest and she paused. Spike didn’t. His hand shot up and twisted her wrist to make her drop the stake.
How was she ever supposed to win this? She thought she’d been in control, but it wasn’t like she could stake him to prove she’d won. Maybe a neat little touch to his chest to just say “If this was the real thing you’d be dead now”, but she never had time to do that.
Her back was pressed up against the tree and he grinned wildly at her. She made one attempt to break free, but he tightened his grip around her upper arms. Her heart was pounding in her ears as she stared up at him. Slowly, finger by finger, he let go of her right arm and raised his hand to touch her face. The first brush of his rough fingertips against her skin was hesitant, but then he cupped her cheek.
“Slayer,” he murmured, his breath cool against her lips.
He stepped closer, so close she could their bodies touch. It made her swallow. There was no forgetting of the feeling of a male body pressed against hers. The soft touch of his fingers was lost when she felt his erection press into her stomach. Closing her eyes, his face flashed before her.
Her eyes flew open.
Roughly she shoved him away and he stumbled backwards. The feeling of his skin sliding against hers. His nails digging into her hips.
“Buffy. No.”
Hands grabbed her shoulders and she raised her eyes. Pretty blue. She began shaking her head. No. No. No.
“I’m not,” she mumbled, “I’m here. I’m here. I’m here.”
“Yes. You’re here. He can’t touch you.”
Her gaze locked with his. “He can’t touch me.”
“No.”
Slowly she looked down at her hands and saw them tremble. Hastily she turned her back to the vampire and the weight of his hands was gone. Hugging herself, she stared out into the darkness.
Seconds went by.
“Why does this happen to me, Spike?” she whispered, “The instant something reminds me of... it’s like a part of me just shuts down.”
She heard movement and then he was in front of her, cupping her chin and tilting her head up so she looked at him. “Listen to me, Slayer,” he said, “There’s nothing wrong with your reaction, not after... I... I shouldn’t have touched you like that.”
“I want to go home,” she whispered.
His hand dropped.
“Sure, love.”
The silence while they walked back to her house in reminded Spike of yesterday. It was choking and the thoughts were racing through his mind. He wondered what she was thinking. He wondered what would’ve happened if she hadn’t pushed him away. The fight had been bloody great; she’d seemed at ease and she’d fought better than ever.
Would he have kissed her?
She was the Slayer, all he wanted with her was help to get the revenge, so he could go on with his life and if – yes.
He would have.
Looking at her now as she stared up at her bedroom window, he found himself at total loss of what to say. She still had her arms wrapped around her small form, but her expression was empty.
“Do you think it’ll always be like this?”
The softly spoken words startled him, making him turn towards her completely.
“What do you mean?” he asked, frowning a little.
She swallowed hard. “I don’t want anyone to touch me,” she whispered, “People I know... that’s okay or if I start the... touching. But I shudder just to think of... anyone else’s hands on me.”
“It’s normal, pet.” He smiled a little. “What you’ve been through... There’s nothing strange about how you feel.”
She looked up at him then, tightening her arms around herself. “Really? You think it’ll pass?”
“Maybe never completely,” he said and her face fell, “But hey, you let me hit you several times today.”
“I would’ve won!” she said, scowling at him, “If you hadn’t cheated.”
“Cheating? Me?!” He put on such a look of innocence that she had to stifle a giggle. “Like I’d ever do that!”
She gave him her best ‘give me a break’ look. It made Spike grin.
“Actually I didn’t cheat,” he said, “You’re just too –“
“Oh, shut up.”
TBC