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Author's Chapter Notes:
This is a screwball comedy/ light drama road story with a twist.
Chapter 7- Changes in Attitudes
Grandpa’s beard
was stiff and course
and that’s what caused
his fifth divorce
Burma- Shave

With the sun setting behind the van, Spike pressed the gas pedal and glanced in the rearview mirror. It seemed another large meal, this time dinner at a barbeque restaurant, and the earlier shopping had done everyone in, there wasn’t an open eye in the entire van.

His attention was diverted from the realization that only he and the Slayer were awake when a small red sports car pulled alongside. He flicked his ash through the open window and looked over at the driver.

A gorgeous blonde, long hair streaming in the wind casually looked over at him and smiled.

Spike, tongue between his teeth, nodded at her and grinned.

She blew him a kiss, waved and pushed the convertible. The sports car disappeared around a curve.

Spike shifted in the seat.

“Pretty.”

Spike whipped his head around. He’d completely forgotten the Slayer was awake. “What?”

Buffy, her hands in her lap, smiled sweetly. “I said ‘pretty’”.

“Not much for convertibles myself, pet. Never trusted those automatic motors that control the top.”

“I wasn’t talking about the car. I figured you didn’t even notice the car with the driver going all Christy Brinkley at you.”

Spike stared into her eyes briefly. “She doesn’t hold a candle to you.” Gripping the wheel tighter, he turned his attention back to the road.

The ‘thank you’ was spoken so softly that only vampiric ears caught it.

Hearing her heartbeat accelerate, he cut his eyes over to the Slayer and watched as she stared out the window herself, a small smile playing across her lips.

Spike relaxed his grip and stepped down on the accelerator. Georgia beckoned.

*****

“We should remove it.”

Xander peered closer. “I’m not sure we can do that, without removing some of the paint too.”

“I think that’s just despicable, the way people take liberties with other people’s personal possessions, especially advertisers.” Anya shook her head.

Willow wrinkled her nose. “It’s really gross.” She looked at her best friend and asked, “What do you want to do?”

“I don’t know.” Buffy stared at the enormous lime green bumper sticker that someone had plastered across the back of the van.

She read it out loud. “Visit the Cockroach Museum, Plano Texas.” Since when are cockroaches that particular shade of purple?

“At least it covers some of the worst scratches.” Spike commented and looked at the Slayer. “I think Harris is right, you need to let a professional remove that, pet.”

She sighed. “Leave it. Besides we’ve only got a little while to get back to the site.”

Hiking toward the back of the building, Buffy called back over her shoulder. “Be careful guys, stay near the building. Come on Spike, it’s behind here somewhere.”

The vampire nodded and followed her around the corner of the tourist trap. He mused as they walked. “What is it with humans? Why do you put up all these road side attractions anyway?”

Buffy scanned the ground around the building. “I don’t have any idea. Do you see the ball thingy anywhere?”

Spike, confined to the overhang in the evening sun, shrugged. “Sorry, pet, but I’m not really much good out here right now.”

“Why don’t you go and trade places with Xander? I’d feel better if you were with Dawn anyway. So far, these portal balls haven’t been any real trouble.”

”On my way.”

*****.

“I found it Buffy.” Xander held up the portal key. “It’s over here.” He grimaced. “Ugh, it’s a little damp.” He wiped his hand on his jeans and handed the ball to the Slayer.

“Thanks Xan. Good job.”

“All in a day’s work.” Xander grinned. “Hey, I’m just like a real superhero, but with no powers or motivation.”

After the Slayer gave him the portal key, Spike placed it in the receptacle. Closing the trunk carefully so he didn’t rattle all of those bleedin’ bells again, he commented. “So, that’s three of ‘em.” He scanned the rapidly darkening sky. “No sign of any demons either.”

“Buffy, the next portal key is in five hours.” Tara held up the locater pendent.

“We need to head north.” Willow added

“Okay, everybody, saddle up.” Buffy looked around. “Where are Anya and Dawn?” She glared at the vampire. “You were supposed to be watching them. I can’t trust you to do something right for five seconds.”

“You told me to put the portal key away.” Spike scowled at her. “Besides they went to the loo and that’s a line I refuse to cross.”

“If I give you an assignment, you need to do it.” Buffy crossed her arms in front of her.

The vampire narrowed his eyes. “I don’t know what your problem is, Slayer, but I bet it’s really hard to pronounce.”

“I don’t have a problem, except for you, Spike.” She took a step closer to him.

He gritted his teeth. “Sorry, but it’s not my day to care.”

Wide eyed, Willow watched the vampire move toward Buffy and growl.

The Slayer balled her fists and moved forward another step.

The witch quickly laid a restraining hand on Buffy’s arm. “Come on, Buff, we need to get moving. Tight time schedule and everything.”

Tara moved into the vampire’s line of sight. “Come on Spike, I think it’s your turn to drive.”

Buffy lifted her chin. “Whatever.” She started for the van.

Spike, his eyes never leaving the Slayer, shrugged. “Fine.” He turned toward the driver’s seat.

The witches watched the couple stalk away in opposite directions. Willow spoke first. “What just happened here? They almost came to blows over absolutely nothing.”

Tara shook her head. “Must be this trip. I think it’s starting to get to everybody.”

Looking around, Willow saw Dawn and Anya walking out of the building and waved them over.

Spike gunned the van’s motor and they shot out of the parking lot.

******

”Xander, what are you doing?” Anya watched her boyfriend carry an armload of snacks to the trash bin at the gas station.

Xander lifted the lid and dropped everything. “I’ve decided I need to lose some weight.” He reached in the van and grabbed the box of Twinkies. Pitching them in the can, he added. “I’m going on a serious diet.”

Anya looked confused. “Right now? In the middle of a trip?”

“No time like the present.” He grabbed the tin of caramel popcorn from the backseat.

Anya shrugged. “Don’t expect me to purchase more snack foods when you decide this was an enormous mistake. That would not make good economic sense.”

”No problemo. This is definitely no mistake, I have to do this. ”

Anya watched her boyfriend toss his remaining snacks in the trash. This is so wrong. I can’t believe I just watched Xander Harris throw out a fresh, completely unopened box of Ding Dongs.

****

Waiting in the van under a shady tree, Willow picked up the thick book. “This book is especially cool; it has so many interesting facts in it. I bet they must have had a huge research budget and about a gazillion researchers.” She stroked the book lovingly.

Sitting next to her girlfriend, Tara watched Willow thumb slowly through the book, highlighting particular passages. iHow like Willow to have brought along informational books and highlighter pens on a trip. Let’s see, so far I’ve heard all about Louisiana, Texas and Mississippi. Here comes Georgia. Amused, she put an interested expression on her face.

The red head found the passage she wanted. “Georgia was one of the original thirteen colonies. I’d almost forgotten that. It’s the twenty-fourth state in size. I keep meaning to look up which is the largest. I think it’s probably Alaska. The Georgia state bird is….”

Keeping the interested expression on her face, Tara allowed her mind to wander. I wonder how much longer before Buffy and Anya get back with the key? She glanced over at Spike standing sullenly next to the van talking to Xander. It had surprised her when the vampire refused to go with the Slayer.

Tara frowned, turning the earlier squabble over in her head. She and Willow had heard the entire exchange, but they couldn’t come up with any actual reason for it. Tara knew the two blonds liked to snark at each other, although lately there had been an underlying fondness that she’d hoped would play out with the two becoming a couple. But the trip certainly looked to be ruining that, this last argument had been just plain mean. The two were beginning to act as if they couldn’t stand to be near each other, each one trying their hardest to make the other angry. She worried another incident like today would cause a permanent split between them.

She glanced at Dawn, sleeping in the back seat. It was a good thing they seemed to have shaken the demons for now, every one could use a break.

With Spike standing guard over the rest of the group and Xander buried under the hood, checking out a strange noise within the van’s engine, Buffy had recruited Anya to go with her. Tara shifted. We’re all getting a little wired and loopy. We need a break.


Willow caught the movement out of the corner of her eye. “I’m sorry, was I going too fast?” She cleared her throat and started again slower. “The state of Georgia is bordered on the south by the state of Florida, on the north by the state of Tennessee….”

****

The Slayer rapidly scanned the ground. “It should be right around here.”

Anya peered under the largest hedge. “Oh, Buffy, here it is.” Smiling, she held up the little round portal key. “Ugh, it has a little bit of goo on it.” Wiping her hand on her jeans, Anya walked up to the Slayer. “You didn’t tell me it was going to be sticky.”

Buffy dropped the ball in her skirt pocket before answering. “Sorry, I didn’t know. It’s probably something from the hedge.” She returned the smile. “Thanks for coming along with me. It’s starting to get dark and with Xander checking out that noise in the van and Spike being pissy, I needed another pair of eyes. This way we can grab it and hopefully get going before any demons show up.”

“Spike was in a bad mood, but he’s usually so much nicer than any of the other vampires that I’ve met. I just think this trip is starting to affect us all. I mean, look at Xander. I still can’t believe he pitched his snack food.”

“I just hope there’s no major problem with the van.”

Anya nodded. “In my experience, if it’s got tires or testicles, it’s going to give a woman problems.” She fell into step with Buffy. “That’s just the way it is.”





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