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Author's Chapter Notes:
A massive thanks to my Beta Burnkitty *kisses*
A huge thanks the Edgehead for the awesome banner love your work Mel.
Chapter 20.

Never want to say goodbye.

How could this be happening? William thought angrily. This wasn’t meant to happen. They were suppose to be the happy family, get married, have the house with the white picket fence and live happily ever after. William sensed movement down the hallway and heard a small cry. Angrily pushing his tears away with the back of his hand, he stood to be confronted with Drusilla and the nurse that held his beautiful infant daughter. She was quiet now, her eyes closed. With one look at William, Drusilla knew some thing was wrong with Buffy. It reflected in his eyes like a mirror. She could hear the doctor in the room behind William talking, his voice urgent but she was unable to make out what he was saying. Drusilla whispered something in the nurse’s ear and the nurse simply nodded, giving Drusilla the small bundle she held with care.

“Spike, how about we go and show Dawn and the other’s Elizabeth. I am sure they would all love to see her.” William numbly nodded his head at her but made no attempt to move from the wall. Drusilla reached out with her free arm and tugged on William’s shirt gently. He reluctantly followed, his eyes hopefully glancing at the door once more to the room where Buffy lay before he entered the waiting room with Drusilla.

The second Dawn spotted Drusilla with the small bundle she held in her arms, she leapt up out of her seat and clapped her hands over her mouth to muffle the scream that threatened to burst forward. She practically tiptoed up to Drusilla and peered over the blanket to view the sleeping baby. William came up beside Drusilla, not really knowing what to do with him self. Dawn looked over at him, confused.

“Where’s Buffy?” Instead of answering, William sunk into the closest waiting room chair and crumpled into a ball. Tears were threatening to fall again. He held his head in the palms of his hands and hunched over with his elbows resting on the top of his thighs. William clenched his jaw, praying that everything was just a dream, that Buffy was fine. Dawn wasn’t about to give up though.

“Spike. Where. Is. She? Where’s Buffy?” Dawn could feel her own eyes stinging with tears now, her stomach churning at the possible thought of some thing bad happening to Buffy. Dawn felt Willow come up beside her and wrap a comforting arm around her shoulder. William looked up at his sister, his eyes shining with fresh tears.

“She…She…” A lone tear slipped down William’s cheek. “There are complications.” He replied, dead toned before burying his face in his hands again and this time, his shoulders began to shake. Dawn could feel her own tears silently falling to the floor along with her brothers as she looked over to the door where William and Drusilla had come from. Giles took this moment to approach Drusilla and after a few murmured words between them, Giles simply nodded his head. Willow and Xander exchanged knowing glances before Willow moved towards Tara. This was not good.

“Can I hold her?” Dawn’s broken voice cracked though the silence between the group. Drusilla smiled and handed Dawn her niece. William seemed to gain some control over himself at this point and looked up at his sister. He watched as her eyes lit up as Drusilla put Elizabeth into her arms.

“Oh.” Dawn gushed. “She’s beautiful.” William watched on as one by one his friends crept up to his sister to look at the small bundle she now nursed. He wished he could enjoy the feeling of what was before him but his thoughts were only on Buffy. He was getting antsy, impatient and time seemed to keep ticking by with no result. He needed to think, clear his head.

Standing, William began to pace the length of waiting room. Back and forth, back and forth. He kept telling himself that everything was going to be fine. That one day that they were going to sit back and remember this day, a joyous day of when their daughter was born. He didn’t know how long he had been pacing, it seemed like forever. It took him a moment to register that someone was calling his name.

“Spike. Buddy.” William stopped and looked up from the floor to see Xander peering at him with concern.

“I’m fine.” He grunted.

“Yeah and I’m the Easter Bunny.” Xander cocked his eyebrow at his friend.

“Really I’m fine. Look.” William tried to rationalise. “Buffy is going to be fine. I mean the prophecy mentions that she will be there with Elizabeth on the day of the apocalypse right?”

“Actually…” Tara interjected. William whipped around to the direction to where Tara’s voice had come from, his gaze locking intently on her as she spoke.

“The prophecy says Buffy was brought back the give birth to Elizabeth it doesn’t actually say she’ll be there on the day of the apocalypse…” She trailed off. William’s eyes flashed with anger. She sunk back into Willow for protection, afraid that William was going to lash out at her.

“So what? They think they can just bring her back long enough so she can have Elizabeth and then take her back? That they can trick us into thinking that we can be a family and then rip it away from me? Who the bloody hell do they think they are? I love her, I want to marry her and be with her as we grow old together. I refuse to say goodbye to her now.” William gritted his teeth, his mind spinning. He looked up to the ceiling as if he could see something there, his eyes burning with tears that threatened to fall.

“Do you hear that? I can’t lose her; I won’t let you take her from me, from us. Not now.” Xander still stood beside William, not knowing what to do or say. Giles rose from his seat and placed his hand on William’s shoulder to gain his attention. He waited patiently for William to lower his gaze and look at him before speaking to his enraged slayer.

“William. You need to calm yourself.” Giles nodded his head in the direction of the doors of the birthing suite. Turning, William saw the doctor that had been in the room with Buffy approach them. The whole room seemed to still with his very presence.

“How is she?” he asked, terrified. The doctor simply motioned for him to sit down. William shook his head defiantly. The doctor looked at him wearily, a sure sign to Giles that the news that the man was about to deliver wasn’t going to be good. He kept his hand on William’s shoulder, trying to show him some support.

“We where able to stabilize Buffy and stop the bleeding…”

“That’s good right?” he asked hopefully the doctor frowned at this.

“She has lost a lot of blood Mr. Summers. As a result of this she has gone into a self induced coma and has not responded to any of the physical stimulation tests we have ran on her.” he replied matter-of-factly. Giles watched as William’s face paled.

“What does that mean exactly?” William asked slowly, confused.

“The chances of Buffy ever regaining consciousness is… minimal.”

“Are you saying she won’t wake up?”

“I’m saying it’s very unlikely. I am sorry to deliver you this bad news at this time but you may want to conceder saying your goodbyes.” William felt like he was going to be sick. How could he say goodbye? He turned away from the doctor feeling like he couldn’t breathe. He reached out blindly for the wall to steady himself but found only air. How could this be happening? How could they take her away from him after all this time? He barely heard Giles thank the doctor for his efforts and ask where they could see Buffy.

William’s head was spinning; it felt light but heavy at the same time. He felt his hand connect with something solid and grabbed it. Xander pulled him in close, letting William’s head rest on his shoulder, trying to be strong for the person who had been there for him so many times. It was only when Giles spoke did William made an attempt to move away.

“Maybe you should go first William.” he suggested. William nodded, his expression a mixture of shock and horror as followed the doctor. He somehow knew that his daughter was going to be alright with Dawn who refused to let go of her. They walked down though a long corridor, his and the doctors footsteps echoing with each step. He didn’t know what to expect, what to say or do. The doctor stopped in front of him and gestured to the doorway to his left. William hesitantly pushed it open and stepped inside.

Buffy looked so small and frail on the bed before him. She was hooked up to machines that beeped occasionally and had an IV hooked up to her left arm. Her hair was a mess, her face blending in with the dull white painted on the walls. She looked peaceful, like she was sleeping. William approached the bed slowly and sat on the chair provided. He reached out and clasped her hand with his own, feeling that it was limp and without feeling.

“Buffy, luv. Can you hear me?” he asked. He felt like he was dying inside. He looked over at the ring Buffy still had on her finger. It seemed to be mocking him now as her hand stayed still, only rising and falling on her chest as she breathed. How could he say goodbye to someone he didn’t want to let go of? Silent tears began to run down his face again as he tried to fathom how life would be without her. He searched her face for something, anything but found nothing. He squeezed her hand gently.

“Buffy, don’t make me say goodbye. Please. Come back to me.” William’s voice cracked, his emotions taking hold once again. “Hey, remember the first time we met? At the Bronze? I remember you telling me that you were going to kill me in that oh so cocky swagger of yours that night. I remember feeling so disappointed that you were a vampire then.” He raised her limp hand to his mouth and kissed the back of it softly. “But even back then something inside me knew that we belonged together. So please luv, don’t leave me. I can’t live without you. I need you and I love you.” He laid his head down on her side and wept.

He didn’t know how long he had laid there, holding her hand and cried till no more tears would fall. Time didn’t matter to him any more. She was gone. All hope had been extinguished. Sucking in a deep breath he lifted his head and looked at her. She still laid perfectly still, her eyes closed and her chest rising and falling softly. He knew he had to be strong, had to be strong for her and for their daughter. He had to let her go.

Standing he placed her hand on her chest along with the other one and placed a soft kiss on her forehead. “Goodbye Buffy. I love you.” He whispered before turning to walk out of the room. He could feel his heart breaking, shattering into a million pieces. He paused in front of the door, leaning his head against it lightly, trying to gather himself. Trying to stop the tears coming again.

“Hey cutie.” Her voice seemed to float across the room, caressing him as it did so, filling him with all the warmth and hope in the world. William gasped, spinning around to face her. Could it be true? Her green eyes looked back at him and a hundred different emotions seem to hit him at once.

“You’re not giving up on me that easy are you?” she asked, smiling softly at him. William rushed to her bed side, scooping her upper body up in his arms and hugged her tight.

“Oh god…” he sobbed into her shoulder, tears flowing down his face again but this time tears of pure joy. He pulled back, looking into her eyes, still not quite believing that she was really there. He ran his hand down her face softly before kissing her cheek.

“I was sure I had lost you luv.” His face hardened a little bit. “Don’t you ever do that to me again.” he growled before his eyes softened once again and Buffy couldn’t help but laugh at him.

“Oh God Buffy. I need to go tell the doctor.” William leapt up from the bed and raced to the door. Buffy sat there, stunned. Then she saw William rip the door open so hard that he almost tore it clean off the door frame. She quietly giggled to herself, amused by his vigour to get the doctor. As the doctor entered the room, a look of concern spread across his face.

“Buffy, how are you feeling?”

“Fine.” She replied as the doctor checked her stats on the monitors. Buffy sat there, still quite amused by the situation. The doctor then asked her a series of questions which Buffy answered correctly and without hesitation. The doctor looked at her stunned.

“It’s a miracle.” he muttered, not quite believing that the young woman was awake.

“She always was.” William whispered. The doctor shook his head and walked out of the room, leaving the two reunited lovers alone once more. If he had stayed he would have seen the look of love in both their eyes and noticed the soft, gentle touches that only made them move closer to each other.

~~~*~~~

The attending doctor insisted to do a thorough check over Buffy before moving her back to the maternity wing. William had managed to pull himself away from Buffy long enough to tell everyone in the waiting room that she was awake and healthy before taking Elizabeth back with him He watched as Buffy’s eyes shone with pride as he handed their daughter to her, oblivious to the doctor taking a blood sample. The staff knew better to question the woman’s miraculous recovery. After all, stranger things have happened in this hospital. They were just relieved that she was showing all signs of perfect health.

After being moved to a private room in the maternity wing, William asked Buffy if she wished to see everyone else. Buffy jumped at the chance, saying that she wanted to see everyone that had been here for them. Willow, Xander and Dawn all tumbled in the room together; their smiles so wide that Buffy thought their faces were going to break any moment. They swarmed around her, offering there thank gods and its good to see you’s. Tara and Anya came in next, more quietly, watching the others in their excitement. It was some time later that Giles and Drusilla appeared, with Giles’ brow furrowed in deep thought. William sprung his line of questioning on his watcher at once, wanting answers.

“How is it possible Giles? I mean it’s not like I’m not grateful because I am, but the doctor said that she was basically dead.” William turned to look at Buffy. “No offence luv.” Buffy just smiled at him knowingly.

“William, honestly I don’t know.” He took off his glasses and started cleaning them with a handkerchief he retrieved from his pant pocket. The room fell silent again.

“Do you think maybe the reason why I came back the way I did was for this very reason?” The words tumbled out of Buffy’s mouth before she even realised it. Giles stopped cleaning his glasses and looked up at Buffy in awe. It seemed to spur Buffy on somehow though.

“I mean we always thought that the reason why I had all my vampire powers still was so I could protect myself while I was pregnant.” She glanced over at Elizabeth who was sleeping soundly in the hospital supplied basinet. “But we all know that Spike did all the protecting for me. Soo…maybe the reason why I still have my powers is that the Powers that Be anticipated this happening and gave me the chance to heal myself. Because you know, really should be dead.”

“My lord Buffy, I hadn’t thought of that!” Giles exclaimed, putting his glasses back on.

“Well what ever the reason luv I’m just glad you’re alive… I just couldn’t live without you.” William whispered into Buffy’s ear before kissing her softly. He silently thanked the Powers that Be for giving him this second chance with her. Pulling back, William smiled at his beloved. He swore to himself that he was going to show this woman just how much he loved her for the rest of his life.


Chapter End Notes:
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