Chapter 31: Lies My Parents Told Me
“Oh, Jesus! I don’t think I can do this!” Cordelia spun around, ready to bolt. Spike easily caught her around the waist, however, and swung her back around to face the gigantic brick mansion in front of them.
“Oh, yes, you can.”
She shook her brown head vehemently, eyes wide and looking beyond scared. “Nooo. I really can’t, Spike. I mean, I thought I could, but, ya know, as it turns out…I really can’t.”
“Cordelia, this is what you said you wanted.”
“Yeah, well, we all say that we want things that we really don’t.” She snapped, a little too harshly.
Spike gave her a hurt look, and she frowned, upset that she had managed to hurt his feelings yet again.
“I didn’t mean that.”
Spike shook his head solemnly. “Yes, yes, you did.” He pulled away from her, and took a large step back. “And it’s okay, really. I deserved that, pet.”
“No you didn’t. That’s just me being bitchy Cordy again.”
Spike nodded, looking back up at the tall building in front of them. “You ready, yet, luv?”
She looked from his face to the place that she had once called home. Sighing out loud, she shrugged, willing herself not to cry until after she was done doing what needed to be done to set things right.
She nodded, frowning. “Whatever.”
~*~*~*~
Buffy stopped pacing abruptly at the sound of the doorbell. Her father had left the room to use the restroom, and she was left to deal with her own thoughts. Spike was in New York. Spike came to New York. Spike hopped a plane and came to New York to see me. To ask me to marry him. Spike wanted to marry me! She inwardly did the snoopy dance at the last thought, then frowned when she realized that said Spike was now engaged to someone else. “Arrgh!” She growled, throwing her hands up into the air, determined to clear her thoughts about the bleached-wonder and focus on anything else.
Opening the door a little to enthusiastically, Buffy was surprised to see the one person she wasn’t expecting.
“Mom!” She cheered loudly, and flung herself forward to throw her arms around the eldest Summers woman.
Joyce instinctively dropped her luggage on the ground and wrapped her own arms around her daughter.
“Someone’s happy to see their mother.” She commented, amused.
Buffy laughed as she pulled away, giving her mother a toothy smile. “You’ve got no idea. God, I’m so glad you’re here.”
“That bad, huh?” Joyce smiled, reaching down to pick up her forgotten bags.
Buffy slapped her hands away and heaved both bags off the ground, turning to return to the inside foyer. Joyce followed close behind, and closed the door with a soft click.
“Things have been insane here.” Buffy told her, looking over her shoulder. The two entered the living room, where Buffy deposited the bags near the couch, and turned to face her mother again.
“Insane?” Joyce asked, an eyebrow raised up in question.
Buffy nodded, briefly frowning when she thought of the days’ past events. “Oh yeah. Do I have some stories to tell you.”
“Is that right?” Joyce smiled, feeling the need to tease her eldest daughter. “Are any of them kinky?”
Buffy’s green eyes widen into a comically large size, and Joyce suppressed a chuckle.
“Mother!”
Joyce laughed loudly, and her eyes lit up. Buffy had to smile at that. It was always a plus to see her mother happy. She’d let her mom tease he all day if it made her smile.
“You were such an easy target, sweetie. I couldn’t help it.” Joyce told Buffy, with a loving smile. “So, how’s William doing?”
Buffy frowned and looked to the ground, blushing as she thought of the things they did to each other the night before. She ran a shaky hand through her hair, and took a deep breath. Looking up to meet her mother’s waiting gaze, she chuckled slightly.
“Yeah, well, that’s the insane part.”
Joyce furrowed her brows, not quite understanding. “William’s insane?”
Buffy shook her head. “No.” She stop then, and thought about what she just said. “Actually, yes. Spike’s completely insane. You should see him, mom. Just the other day, I had to taze him with my tazer, then strap him to the bed.”
“Seems I have missed a lot. I should have flown in earlier.” Joyce smiled. “I’ve missed all the excitement.”
“Don’t worry. I’m sure I can provide more than my share.” Both women turned sharply at the new voice.
“Hank.” Joyce observed, clearly affected by her ex-husband’s presence. After all, they hadn’t had any contact at all for nearly three years.
“Joyce.” Hank nodded curtly, uncertain how he should proceed.
Buffy looked back and forth between her parents, and nodded to herself. Making the decision to give them some space and time alone to work out their issues, Buffy clapped her hands together, swinging them back and forth.
“Wow, look at the time.” She pretended to check her imaginary watch. “I really would just love to stay and chat, but I got this…thing, to do, and I really don’t want to miss it. Mom, I’m sure dad can help you with your things. My room seems to have magically cleared out and all.”
Joyce looked to her daughter, confused. “You room? Where are you staying?”
“Next door.” Buffy told her, inching closer to the front door.
“Why are you next door?”
Buffy laughed nervously. “And that’s just one of those insane little things that I’m gonna have to fill you in on. Later.”
Joyce gave her an annoyed look, and rolled her eyes. “I really hope you aren’t trying to seduce the groom before the wedding, Buffy.”
Buffy laughed, knowing her mother was just teasing again. “No, mom. That would be rude.”
“That’s right.” Joyce smiled, ignoring Hank for the moment.
“I’ll see you both later.” Buffy turned to go, but stopped to look back. “And dad?”
Hank looked up at his daughter. “Yeah, sweetie?”
“Don’tcha think it’s about that time to do that thing you have to do, too?” She asked pointedly.
Hank nodded, understanding. He glanced in the direction of Joyce, who looked bewildered at the strange exchange between father and daughter.
“See ya later, guys.” And she closed her door softly behind her retreating form.
Hank turned to look at his ex-wife, and waited silently. Joyce did the same.
A moment passed and he silence threatened to swallow them up.
Finally finding his voice, Hank cleared his throat and met her gaze head on. “Joyce, I want to apologize.”
~*~*~*~
A door slammed shut loudly, rattling the foundation of the large mansion, and thunderous yelling could be heard, even from the driveway, as the young dark-haired woman made her way quickly down the porch steps and toward her expensively looking red convertible. Digging around in her leather purse, she finally found her keys and pulled them out, shaking them around to locate the correct key to unlock her door.
Reaching the driver’s side of the car, she inserted the key into the lock and stopped. She sniffled loudly, reaching up to wipe furiously at the escaping tears before roughly slinging her purse back to her should where it had fallen. She was determined not to cry however, and slammed her fist down angrily atop the hood of the car in an attempt to get a hold of her emotions.
Hearing the yelling voices getting louder by the minute, Cordelia turned suddenly when the front door swung open and the arguing continued.
“We should have known you wouldn’t be able to keep it in your pants, boy! Someone like you should have stayed in the white trash family you came from.” An older looking man, with silver tinted brown hair, in a very expensive Armani suit shouted from the doorway.
Spike’s head snapped back to glare at the man, clearly pissed off. “White trash? Please, Mr. Chase, you do know that Revello Drive is one of the most bloody expensive streets to live on in Sunnydale, don’t you? Or did you miss that town meeting when you were out fucking hookers behind your wife’s back?”
Mrs. Chase suddenly appeared in the doorway, alarmed to have heard such a thing. “You get the hell out of here, William. I won’t have some ignorant little shit here spreading lies about my husband. Roger would never do no such thing!”
“Oh, really, mom?” Cordelia spoke up from her spot near the car, and stocked over toward the house, keys still hanging from the lock, forgotten for the moment. “What about that time when he missed my graduation ceremony, or when he wasn’t there to except his award for VIP of Chase Industries? Jesus, mom, he was even late for Lilah’s service for crying out loud!”
She had tears in her chocolate eyes now, remembering her late older sister.
Mr. and Mrs. Chase both gasped at her exclamation.
“How dare you, you little brat?!!” Mr. Chase yelled down to her. “I was stuck in traffic, you ungrateful-”
Cordy cut him out though. “Oh, really? Traffic, was it? So it must have been the traffic that somehow managed to leave those little black panties under the front seat too, huh dad?”
Mrs. Chase’s eyes bugged out of her head. “What?!! Your father would never do that, Cordelia!”
“No, no I guess he wouldn’t, would he?” Cordy smiled bitterly. “Father knows best, for he can do no wrong, right? Wake up, mother! How can you be so blind?!”
Mrs. Chase huffed loudly, while Mr. Chase responded with another vicious comment.
“You have no right coming here-bringing him with you- and accusing me of cheating on your mother! Maybe if you could keep your own man entertained, he wouldn’t be off fucking his ex. What’s ‘er name? Bunny?”
“It’s Buffy!” Spike responded, clenching his jaw. Cordy’s eyes snapped to his face, almost feeling his anger rolling off him in waves.
“Buffy!? Like that’s any better!” Mr. Chase shouted, annoyance written across his face. “Figures.”
“What the bloody ’ell’s that supposed to mean?” Spike yelled back, ready to charge.
“No wonder he’s getting’ it from Buffy, Cor.” Cordy listen to her father’s harsh words. “With a name like that…Bet she’s good too, huh, William? How much she charge by the hour, son?”
“You son of a bitch!” Spike went to take a step toward the older man, when Cordy put a hand on his chest, halting him. Spike looked down at her, and gave her an expectant look. Did she really expect him to not respond to that one?
Turning back to her parents, Cordy was livid. “You shut up about Buffy, got it!? You haven’t the slightest clue about her. She isn’t anything like that. You’re the only whore here!”
Spike was surprised that Cordelia stepped up to defend Buffy. He figured the last thing she wanted to do was put Buffy in a better light than herself in front of her parents. He knew the two would probably never be the best of friends, but maybe there was hope to form some kind of stable ground that could lead to a friendship.
However awkward that may be.
“Oh, look at you, playing the martyr. Do you really think that little slut wouldn’t screw you over the first chance she got? Cordelia, she just slept with your fiancé not twenty four hours ago! And you’re defendingher?!” Mr. Chase asked incredulously.
Cordy shook her head, determined to get what she needed to say out. “Yes, I am. Because I know she’s not like this. Like us. She doesn’t stomp on whoever she has to, to get what she wants. And you know what? I may not like her very much. I may not ever like her much, but I like her a whole lot more than I’ll ever like you!”
Mr. Chase laughed callously. “You little idiot! You have no right. You‘re nobody.”
“I’m the idiot?!” She asked in amazement. “Look at you, you pig! You go through life crushing anyone and anything in your path, thinking you’re so bad. You’re a coward, that what you are. Sending your lackeys and underpaid employers to do your dirty work, so you always come out smelling like a rose. How many companies have you stolen out from under people’s backs; How many people lost jobs, or gone to jail in order for you to stay out yourself?” Cordy stopped and laughed, hating the fact that it sounded so much like her fathers. “I bet the IRS would be so interested in learning that you have just innocently forgot to pay your taxes for the last ten years!”
Mr. Chase’s eyes grew comically wide at that. “You’ve no proof!”
“Wanna bet, daddy?” She responded sweetly.
Mrs. Chase choose that moment to intervene. “Cordelia Chase, you stop that this instant! I didn’t raise you like this.”
“You didn’t raise me at all, mother! Flour, the housekeeper, was the one to explain my period to me!”
Spike and Mr. Chase swarmed a little at that. Cordy had to supposed the urge to roll her eyes.
“I was a working mother with two children! I did my best!” Mrs. Chase replied indignantly.
“The best you could do was get drunk and try to teach use to do the salsa?” Cordy questioned.
“Don’t talk to your mother that way!”
“Shut up, dad!” She spat the word at him, like it was something really offensive, and then turned deadly serious. “I want you to look me in the eye, and be honest for once in your life.”
Mr. Chase was silent for a moment and seemed to be considering her request. “I’m always honest.”
“I want you to look me in the eye, and tell me that you don’t wish it was me instead of Lilah.”
Silence filled the air. Everyone looked at Cordy, who looked like she might cry.
Spike had always known that the dark-haired woman had never gotten over her sister’s death, but this was just heartbreaking. She honestly believed that it should have been her that died that night. He was suddenly filled with a newfound anger at the two people still standing on the porch in silence.
“What?” Mr. Chase asked in silence, dazed.
“Don’t lie to me. I’m tired of it. I’m tired of only hearing what you both want me to hear. I want to know. I need to know. Tell me that you don’t wish it was me that night. That you don’t resent the fact that I lived everyday after that, wasting my life-as you like to call it,- while she can’t. Tell me!”
By the time she finished, she has tears in her eyes, and desperation in her voice. She needed this. It was her closure. Her life. Without this she would forever go on with her life always wondering, never knowing. Spike realized that her problems had little to do with him or Buffy. They were problems with herself. His heart went out to her.
“Cordy, you father and I never thought that. We love you, really we did. But when we lost her, we didn’t no what to do. There was just so much! But we always loved you.” Mrs. Chase told her daughter.
“That why you tried to make me just like her?” Cordy retorted angrily. “God, mom, I couldn’t even think my own thoughts. I wasn’t Cordelia anymore. I was just the Lilah replacement. Why couldn’t you just let me be myself? Now I don’t even know who I am anymore.”
She was tired, worn, an ready to leave by the time the last words left her mouth. At least I didn’t cry in front of them. She thought sardonically.
Mr. Chase looked like he was being delicate now. “Cordy, we-”
But she cut them off quickly. “Don’t. I already have my answer, really, and I don’t care anymore. It’s doesn’t matter to me anymore. I don’t need you, or anyone else for that matter. I got me. For your information, you both were really sucky parents, anyway.” She laughed a very Cordelia like laugh and turned to make her way back to her car.
Spike smiled, proud, and walked to his own car, parked next to hers.
Mr. Chase breathed in slowly, obviously affected by her rant. She stopped after she unlocked and opened her door, an looked back up to her mother and father.
“Well done, Cor.” Her father told her, looking hurt, while her mother reflected the same look from her position behind him.
“What can I say, I’ve learned from the best.” Cordy smiled a sickenly-sweet smile. “Now, if you’ll do me the honor of getting thehell out of my life…I’ve got more important things to do than be here.”
Her mother gasped.
“Oh, and daddy?” Cordy called, letting him mellow in his own juices before she spoke again. “I’d watch out. ‘Cause the bitch, is back!”
Mr. Chase waited for a moment before nodding curtly, and turning around to walk back into the house, taking his wife-who was reluctant to follow- with him.
Spike watched as she watched them go inside, a sardonic smile on her face. She looked over to him, and laughed. “Losers!”
Spike chuckled at her antics, and opened his own door, ready to leave. Her voice stopped him. “Spike?”
Her turned around and gave her a questioning look. “What if I really am nobody?”
He shook his head, not even thinking about it. “Don’t be a bint.”
She smiled a broken smile. “I’m a bint?”
Spike smiled.
She nodded. “That’s something.”
He laughed. “Spike?”
“Yeah?”
“Take care.”
He nodded, serious. “You too, Cor.”
And with that, they both got into their cars and drove off.
~*~*~*~
Buffy tapped her fingers on the bar top, bored. She really wasn’t sure why she had decided to come back to the Bronze, but with noting to do until she figured out what to say to Spike and where to go to say what she had to say to Spike, she figured why not. The crowds went as bad in the afternoon, and she was glad she could get out of the house for a while. Maybe her parents would finally work out their issues and find some sort of middle ground between the two of them.
At least, she hoped anyway.
A hand landed on the counter next to her, and she looked up to find the last person she expected to find here.
“Angel?”
“Hey Buffy.” Angel told her, sitting down and making himself comfortable. “Let’s have a little chat.”
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Author's Chapter Notes:
Sorry for the long delay in between chapters. I'm almost done with the next one, and there's only a few more to go. Thanks to everyone who's still reading after all you've had to wait. Again, I'm sorry, college placement tests and campus visits are sucking up my time lately. Please leave a review. I was not sure about posting this chapter, since I think it came out kinda overly dramatic. Tell me what you think!!