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Author's Chapter Notes:
I think I finally know why I couldn't post the capters before, I don't understand but if I can post I think it's ok.
*Disclamer*: In this chapter there're several quoting taken enterily of the chapter Shells of the Angel's fifth season.
**Translation corrected by LadyAvalon.
Previously:

"We’re on our own." Angel said.

"Good, ‘cause I was wondering" reply Spike sitting on the couch’s arm.

"You aren’t alone" Said a female voice coming through the office’s gates.

"Willow?" Wesley asked in a whisper.

"You’ve got us" Added a second voice.

"Buffy?" Both vampires asked, turning toward the door.




Part two


“How did you—” asked Wesley walking confused toward Buffy and Willow.

“Angel just hung up the phone and they’ve told him you were unavailable” added Gunn looking at the witch and pointing to dark-haired vampire, who like Spike was still mute and immobile, staring at Buffy.

Both vampires knew this look in Buffy's face; a look that meant nothing good was store for them. They were going to have to cope with a very angry and disappointed Slayer, and besides she had reason to be, which made both Angel and Spike feel uncomfortable and guilty on her presence.

“I was in an astral plane” Willow explained to the men in the room “Until one hour ago, when I noticed a… change, I didn’t know what it was, something powerful and quite old. I went to look for Buffy and then we went to New Council; we heard a part of Angel’s conversation and came to help.”

“But…” Gunn replied confused “The Watchers’s place is in England, right? And you were in the Himalayas and she…”

“I was in Rome” said Buffy looking the man in suit who she didn’t know.

“I’ve learned teleport recently” Willow said with a smile “Well, Where's Fred?”

The red-haired swallowed hard, when she saw the distorted men’s faces who were avoiding look at her directly, then Wesley raised his sight toward her and she knew it. God, she’d seen this look so often as look herself in the mirror…

“She's gone” Wesley murmured with strangled voice.

“But we’re going to bring her back” Angel said, speaking for the first time since Buffy and Willow came through the door.

“What has… happened?” Willow asked with difficulty.

“That change… you felt, so powerful” Wesley said avoiding her gaze “It was Illyria.”

“Who's Illyria?” Buffy asked carefully.

“It’s an Old-One” Wesley continued “A great warrior king from the Demons age.”

“Were the Old-Ones not extinct?” Buffy asked frowning.

“Yeah” Angel replied without looking directly at the blonde “It was buried, but they extracted its sarcophagus and sent it here.”

“It got inside… inside of Fred” Wesley said with his voice shaken by emotion “Like a parasite, consuming her and….

“Wesley…” Willow murmured sadly.

“Illyria… emptied her body and possessed her” the ex-Watcher ended finally, with tears in his eyes that broke the two women’s hearts. “Fred… is gone.”

A heavy and uncomfortable silence filled the room; it was obvious this girl was very important to everyone.

“Angel and Spike believe it’s possible to bring her back… Co- could you?” Gunn asked the red-haired girl fearfully.

“Maybe… I-I don’t know” Willow replied, she didn’t want encourage false hopes.

“Listen, Red” Spike said taking a step toward the witch, who looked at him with curiosity. Especially, because until two weeks ago, she’d believed the vampire was dead, completely. “Fred’s soul has to be somewhere, right?” Willow limited herself to nod.

“If we contain and expel Illyria from body, we could bring her back, right?” Angel asked this time.

“I guess—” Willow started saying before being interrupted by an annoying and known voice at her back.

“Smack her a good one for me?” Harmony’s shrill voice asked entering Angel’s office “So gonna leave a mark.” She said pointing to a bruise on her face. Then, the blonde vamp stopped abruptly looking at both women in the room. “Willow? Buffy?”

“Harmony?” Both girls asked at the same time, as they turned towards the vamp, who looked at them with displeasure on her face.

“You’ve got to be kidding” the Slayer murmured.

“What are you doing here?” Willow asked surprised.

“I work here, of course” Harmony answered placing her hands on her hips. “I’m Angel’s secretary” She said with a wide smile, making Willow and Buffy turn to look at the dark vampire inquiringly, who just shrugged his shoulders. “Doesn’t matter, I only came to tell you that Fred… I mean, Illyria is here.”

“Where?” Wesley asked immediately.

“It took Knox” the female vamp said. “I think they were going to the Lab.”

“The coffin” the ex-Watcher said briefly before walking towards the door decisively

“Wait Wes” Angel stopped him, going to his table and grabbing the phone – which was still intact – “I’ll call the containment team to come with us.”

“A containment team?” Buffy ironically asked nobody in particular, but finding Spike’s cobalt gaze and she found she couldn’t take her eyes off him.

God! She just wanted run towards him, curls up in his arms and tell him how much she'd missed him. Tell him, that now, finally, she understood everything he'd said when she returned from death, tell him that she'd counted every night she couldn’t sleep in his arms, couldn’t breath in his scent, couldn’t feel his adoring eyes on her, couldn’t see his arrogant smirks or hear his sarcastic comments, couldn’t be with… him.

And then she wanted to beat him up, for hiding that he had returned, for finding out only by a slip of tongue from stupid Andrew, when he talked about Angel in the plural, referring to him as "vampires with a soul."

Their relationship had always been stormy, but she thought that the last few weeks in Sunnydale, that the last talks they had, had made things clearer, that in the end they'd come to some point of understanding.

And then he moved his eyes away from her, and Buffy felt as if she'd received a kick in the stomach. He had never taken his eyes off her, never; it had always been all about her. She had hidden from his unfathomable gaze, she had dropped her eyes from his so that he couldn’t see how much she cared about him. Always her.

“Buffy” Said a voice with by a gentle touch to her shoulder. The Slayer raised her eyes and found Willow’s eyes on her, the two friends exchanged a look and then the red-head spoke “Come on” she said indicating the exit following Wesley and Angel, Buffy nodded and began to walk, knowing Spike and the other man walked behind them.


“Don’t we carry weapons?” Buffy asked, when they stopped in front of a door with a sign that said "Only authorized personnel."

“Wesley tried… to cut off its head with an axe and it was smashed to smithereens” Gunn whispered with pain and uncertainty too palpable in his voice, Buffy just nodded and then, all of them entered the lab.


“I’m ready to begin” said Fred's bluish body with a voice that didn’t belong to her.

“Or we could just hang out” Angel replied entering the lab followed by Spike, Buffy, Willow, Wesley and Gunn.

“Warriors?” Illyria said surprised looking at Buffy and the vampires “I was beginning to wonder if this world was void of your kind."

“Plenty of us to go around, luv” Spike answered and then several commandos entered in the laboratory and began to spread out.

“Three half-breeds and a band of primitives” Illyria said raising its chin. “Is this all that challenges me now?”

“Did the Smurfette called me a half-breed?” Buffy asked irritated, and although Spike knew that it wasn’t a good time for jokes, he couldn’t avoid smiling slightly at the Slayer’s comment. He had really missed her.

“That and a whole lot of bullets” Angel replied to Illyria.

“Enough to temporarily incapacitate even you” added Wesley taking a step towards the demon.

“We know what you are, Illyria” Angel continued approaching the bluish demon. “We’ve seen the rest of your kind. All the Old-Ones sealed away forever, like you were, where you should have stayed.”

Illyria was looking at the vampire without blinking, while the rest of those present were admiring what was left of Fred possessed by the Old-One. Gunn could barely look at her; her enormous blue eyes were filled with an evil curiosity, framed by the soft and delicate features of his ex-girlfriend. Willow was looking at her almost with opened mouth. This was Fred? Is this the intelligent and sweet girl whom she had met the previous year? It must have been horrible for her and Wesley, not only he'd seen her die without being able to do anything – The witch unfortunately knew that feeling – but also the ex-Watcher had to watch how a enormously powerful demon entered and possessed, using her body.

“…Something very precious” She heard the dark vampire say “Stand down and we promise you we won’t destroy you before taking it back. Your choice."

“I decline” answered Illyria’s low and hoarse voice, and before anyone could do anything to stop it, the demon had thrown Angel out of the window and paralyzed the room to leave without being seen, or even heard.



After Illyria's unsuccessful detention, they all met in the building’s lobby to decide what to do next. They had underestimated the power and capabilities of the demon. According to the conclusions they had reached, Illyria was capable of altering time to its advantage, besides having huge, superhuman strength. But those men and women had faced worse things; an Old-One wouldn’t stop them.

After exchanging opinions about their encounter with the demon, they decided to divide themselves. Wesley, Willow and Harmony went to the lab to find something in the coffin or in Knox's personal effects that might be of help. Gunn left the offices to, according to him, explore some of his contacts. The two vampires walked towards Angel’s office to get some weapons and Buffy decided this was as good an opportunity as any other, to start their pending chat.


“…I want Fred back as much as much as any of us do” She heard Spike saying while walking towards the office. “But seeing her there like that…maybe she really is…”

“No” Angel replied emphatically. “I lost Cordelia because some thing… violated her, crawled inside and used her up. No way in hell I’m letting that happen again” He said walking toward Spike.

Both vampires stopped their conversation and turned to the entrance, when they heard the doors being closed. Leaning against them, Buffy gazed at them and the two knew what was coming.

“Well, I believe we have a pending conversation” The blonde said, folding arms while still leaning on the door.

“Listen, Buffy” Angel replied with a sigh of weariness. “This isn’t the best moment to talk…

“It seems to me it’s as good as any other” answered the woman before Angel could finish speaking.

“Well it isn’t!” Said the dark vampire sharply. “We must find Illyria and—”

“Look, Angel” Buffy interrupted him, standing up and taking a couple of steps toward him. “You may now the chief of Evil Inc, but we all know that you’re neither a learned man, nor a scientist, or a witch. Only a fighter… and probably straying off his path, but that’s your problem. Until Wes, or Willow…Gunn find Illyria, we three haven’t got anything better to do.”

“You’re not going to stop me from going out” The dark vampire said approaching her enough to brush against her. Buffy smiled, but it wasn’t exactly a sign of sympathy.
“Maybe you’ve also forgotten that you’re still a vamp and I’m the Slayer” answered the petite blonde challenging him.

“As your lap-dog said” Angel responded similarly, referring to Andrew. “Now you’re just one among many.”

Sitting on the back of one of the office’s armchairs, Spike smiled at his grandsire’s words. She would never be just anyone, even if there were a million Slayers, she would always be special, the Chosen One, the One. And Spike’s thoughts must have been similar to Buffy’s, because after giving Angel another of those not very friendly smiles, she grabbed the front of his shirt and threw him against the nearest wall. The dark vampire swallowed a moan at the blow added to his recent injuries after falling out of the window. Then he lowered his head seeing Buffy’s small fist holding him tightly against the wall.

“Whenever you want, I can remind you, if I’m a just one among many Vampire Slayers” Buffy said standing on tiptoes to approach her face to that of the tall vampire’s in a challenging way. Angel refused the challenge and released himself from Buffy’s grip.

“How long have you known?” the dark vampire asked referring to Spike.

“A couple of weeks, more or less” she replied.

“Who… who told you?” Spike asked speaking for the first time since she’d come into the office.

“Andrew” she replied with a half mocking, half hurt.

“Bloody git” Spike murmured under his breath.

“Seriously, were you thinking I was never gonna find out?” Buffy asked both vampires. Neither of them dared to answer. “How could you hide it from me, Angel?” She asked turning to the vamp angrily.

He knew; he knew how guilty and depressed she was feeling because of leaving Spike to a certain death, but she never thought that Angel’s jealousy might make him do something like that.

“Angel?” Harmony asked opening the office’s doors with caution. The three occupants of the room turned to her annoyed.

“What the matter, Harmony?” The dark vamp asked the female taking a step towards her.

“Ummh… I don’t think that you’re gonna like…”

“Get to the point” Angel, Buffy and Spike barked at the same time. Harmony shrugged her shoulders and started to speak quickly.

“Wesley and Willow found a couple of things that might be useful, we also found Knox’s mobile that had several unanswered calls from Dr. Sparrow. Wesley went out a while ago and has returned with the doctor, they’re in the “interrogation room”” Harmony said marking with her fingers. “And Gunn has taken a stab to the stomach.”

“Did Dr Asparagus stab Gunn?” Buffy asked raising a questioning eyebrow.

“Dr. Sparrow” clarified the vamp. “No, that’s the problem. It’s Wesley.

“Wesley?” everyone asked Harmony nodded and shrugged in response.

“Calls Wes and tell him come here” Angel toldthe female vampire. “Spike, you—”

“I know, I’ll make the Doc spill the beans” the bleached vampire answered giving a nod and going to the door. Buffy shot an angry look at Angel and then she hurried to catch up with Spike.

“I’ll go with you” she said without looking at him, walking by his side, the vampire observed her and knew there was no way to make her change her mind, so he continued walking towards the room where the doctor had been locked up.


~ * ~


“That’s supposed to make it all right?” Angel shouted shoving Wesley against the wall.

“Nothing is all right! Nothing… will ever be all right” the ex-Watcher answered with a grin of pain.

“We’ll get her back, Wes” the vampire retorted.

“No. We won’t” the tormented man denied “Fred’s soul was…” Wesley's voice broke at that point to resume his explanation between tears. “Fred's soul was destroyed resurrecting Illyria.”

“Are you sure?” Angel asked a few seconds later, trying to assimilate the harsh information. Wesley didn’t say anything, he just looked at him and the vampire knew all hopes were lost.

“Wesley” said a sad female voice from the entrance, the two men turned to see Willow holding one of the W&H’s reference books. “Believe me, I know… I think everyone here knows how you feel… but we can’t loose hope.

“No!” the ex-Watcher shouted heart-broken “…We won’t get her back.”

“We’ll do it” The witch said vehemently taking a step into the room. “We’ll find the way to get rid of Illyria and bring back Fred’s soul to her body.”

“You don’t understand, Willow” Wesley responded crying “There was nothing to save. Fred's soul was consumed to bring the demon. Her soul no longer exists.”

“Wes” Willow said approaching him and placing a comforting hand on his cheek. “You’re anguished and desperate. But you’re a sage; you know hundreds of things about magic and mystique. What do you know about souls?” The witch looked at his eyes waiting for the spark, but it didn’t come. “You can lose your soul, misplace it, sell it to the evil… but Souls can’t be destroyed” Both, the man and the vampire looked at her with a sparkle of hope they didn’t want to admit to. “Souls are reincarnated again and again, but they can’t be destroyed, they are sacred. Fred's soul is somewhere. We’ll find it, Wes, between you and me; we’ll find her soul and restore it."

“Are you sure?” Angel asked cautiously, Willow nodded. “Then… we have to find Illyria."


~ * ~

Spike was really nervous, Buffy had insisted on "interrogating" the doctor with him, and he didn’t know what to do or how to deal with it. She knew what he was, she knew what he had done, and could do, however she didn’t seem sickened or disgusted by what she knew he was going to do to that man. On the contrary, she seemed to be expectant, almost eager to see what he was going to do, leaning against a wall of the room, in front of the doctor, just watching without blinking. Resigned to showing her something that he didn’t want her to see, Spike began his show.

“Well, well, doc” the vampire said walking around the chair where the man was chained. “Someone has told me that you’ve something to do with what has happened to lil’ Fred” The man didn’t move a muscle and even looked at him.
“Fancy that!” Spike suddenly exclaimed leaning on the doctor, with his hands on his shoulders and bringing his mouth to the doctor’s neck and ear. “Has the cat got your tongue?” He asked while he changed to his demonic face, the man didn’t say anything, just looked at Buffy.

“You should worry about him” Buffy said looking at the doctor and giving a nod towards Spike. “He’s the one who doesn’t get dizzy when he sees blood.”

Spike raised his evil amber eyes with some surprise, to see the Slayer gazing at him holding nothing back, seeing him as he was. The doctor then became resigned to his bloody fate at hands of the vampire, while the woman remained impassive to his cries of pain.


Fifteen minutes later, Spike and Buffy left the room, the vampire was walking fast ahead of her, trying to escape from her look of disgust or hatred, for what he had done to this man, he was a bastard who had brought the coffin to W&H, but still human, and Spike knew what Buffy thought about that. She may understand it was necessary to do what he’d done to obtain that information, but it was impossible for her to condone it, she was the Slayer; she killed those who were like him. And if it weren’t for the long time they’d known each other or because she knew he had a soul, Spike was sure that she already would have dusted him. Nevertheless that wasn’t what Buffy criticized him for.

“Spike” she said grabbing him by the arm and stopping him, even like this he refused to turn and look at her “We should talk.”

“Now isn’t the time, Slayer” the bleached vampire answered with the most distant voice he was able to come up with. Buffy sighed and released him; he took a couple of steps before heard her voice again.

“Why?” She asked making Spike stop while she was facing his back. “Why you didn’t tell me? Why did you hide from me? Wh-…why?”

Spike turned suddenly when he heard the Slayer’s voice breaking in a sob, and when he saw her eyes well up in tears, he felt like his heart was breaking. Was he the cause of her tears? Was she crying for him?

“Buffy…” he murmured, timidly walking towards her.

“Why, Spike?” She asked again, trying to control the tears that were fighting to fall from her eyes. “I didn’t wanna leave you there… sorry, I’m sorry, please forgive me, please…” Buffy trembled at that point, trying to contain her sobs while her tears were slipping down her face.

“God, Buffy!” Spike said closing the space between them and putting one of his hands on her shoulder and the other on her face to look directly at the eyes bathed in tears. “I’ve nothin’ to forgive you, luv. I told you that you should leave me there, remember?”

“No, I…” Buffy stuttered incoherently shaking her head. “I let you die…… I didn’t… I didn’t know what I’d done until everything was ending, until I came England. I can’t…

“Shhh… don’t worry, pet” he murmured closing the distance between them, but without daring to hug her, she may be crying for him, or rather, because she felt guilty for leaving him, but even so, he was afraid that if he tried to hug her, she’d refuse him or would move away. So he just caressed her cheek, feeling her skin under his fingers and feeling happier than he had in many months.

“I’m here now” He said gazing at her. “I was a bloody ghost until a couple of months ago, but I’m fine now” Buffy looked at him frowning, confused to hear about the ghostly thing and Spike seized the opportunity to throw one of his mischievous and arrogant grins.

“You oughta have seen how fun it was to chase Peaches goin’ through walls and doors” he said, Buffy was unable to stop the smile from coming through and he kept his smile looking at her. When she wiped her tears with the sleeve of her shirt, he hurried to pull a handkerchief from his jeans and held it out to her.

“Thanks” Buffy said smiled weakly, taking the handkerchief and drying her tears.


“Spike?” Both heard Harm’s voice ask, approaching them and throwing a fulminating look the Slayer’s way, then, she turned to the bleach vampire with a smile. “Angel sent me to ask if you had gotten anything from the doctor” Spike just nodded slightly.

“We’re goin’ to his office now” The vampire told Harmony, and then he turned back to the Slayer. “Shall we go, pet?”

“Of course” She nodded and moved closer so she could walk beside him towards Angel’s office.



ToBeContinue...





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