“Come in Buffy, Spike.” Giles inclined his head to acknowledge the four footed member of the trio and quickly dropped a fertility goddess on the floor in front of Empress. He’d learned that the faster they gave the Grundy one of the cheap wooden goddesses, the better off they were. She’d disappear into a corner to eat quietly and leave all the expensive pillar candles alone. It was a deal he and Anya had willingly made with the little demon. He reconsidered the long meeting ahead and dropped a second statue, receiving an enthusiastic tail wag in response.
Giles returned to the counter and stood, arms crossed, next to a tall, elderly woman. Buffy knew the pose well. It was her Watcher’s long winded ‘we’ve got a very serious issue we need to discuss’ pose. She glanced at Spike. He caught her look and grimaced.
Buffy turned back to the table where Willow, Xander and Anya were already seated.
Uh oh, everyone’s here, there’s no way this is turning out well.
“Hi everybody.” Sliding into the empty chair across from Willow, she threw her best friend a questioning glance. Willow shook her head slightly and mouthed the words, no clue. Spike straddled the chair next to Buffy and Empress immediately brought her treats over and laid down next to him. Once they were settled, everyone turned to Giles expectantly.
“Okay, Giles, we’re all here, what’s the sitch?”
“First allow me to introduce everyone.” He turned to the older woman. “Dess, this is my Slayer, Buffy Summers, that’s Spike next to her and as I’m sure you’ve surmised by now, that’s Empress. You met my partner Anya a few moments ago, and next to her are Xander and Willow.”
Dess swept her eyes across each of them for a moment, lingering on Buffy. She smiled briefly.
“Everyone, this is Dess, a guiding member of the Sisterhood.”
“I’ve heard of that group before somewhere.”
Giles pulled out a chair at the table for the woman and a chair for himself before answering his Slayer. “It was a member of the Sisterhood that Captain Tarn killed three weeks ago.”
Understanding crossed Buffy’s face. “She was the Grundy breeder.”
Spike leaned forward. “You aren’t here to take Empress back are you? The Council already paid for her and they gave her to us.”
Empress stopped chewing and looked up.
The woman shook her head. “No, that’s not why I’m here.” She turned back to Giles. “Perhaps I should start at the beginning.”
“That’s a good idea. Why don’t you begin with everything you explained to me on the telephone.”
Dess clasped her hands, placing them lightly on the table in front of her. “Well, as Rupert just mentioned, I’m a member of the Sisterhood, a group that has assisted the Powers for many years. As you know, Cara, the Grundy breeder, was also a member.”
She took a moment to smile down at the little demon who had begun crunching her treats again. “A Grundy can be a strong protector of valuables and people. Cara owned three which were not part of her breeding stock, but personal pets and she availed herself of their unique abilities on several occasions. We never interfered of course, it was her decision. But when she was murdered, it fell to me to complete her mission. I needed to locate your Grundy and the bracelet that Cara placed around its neck.”
Buffy frowned. “You mean you’re here for the fake Talisman?”
“Even though it was used as a ruse to fool the soldiers, I can assure you it is in no way a ‘fake’. The morning of her death, Cara knew the soldiers had attempted to break into her facility and that they would return, focused only on acquiring their talisman.
She delivered the Grundy to you, knowing that you’d believe the important piece was the bracelet, guarding it closely while the actual talisman was secretly ensconced within the beast. A bold move, it was her best chance to protect both pieces.
One week ago I was contacted by the bracelet’s owner. She’d been unable to reach Cara and followed failsafe instructions. After our conversation and the subsequent discovery of a bill of sale to the Council amid some partially burned papers, I was able to retrace Cara’s steps and search for the missing bracelet.
I called and spoke with Mr. Travers and learned of all that occurred, both in England and here in Sunnydale. But he made no mention of the missing bracelet, so I surmised it was still with the Grundy. I asked for the beast’s current location and discovered she was still here on the Hellmouth helping the Slayer.”
The elderly woman sipped from a glass of water Giles had provided, giving him the opportunity to speak. “Since we are aware of its existence and have it in our possession, the Sisterhood has requested our assistance in returning the bracelet to its rightful owner. Earlier this evening, after making a few inquiries themselves, the Council agreed.”
Setting the glass back down in front of her, Dess picked up the narration again. “The bracelet was being protected because someone had attempted to steal it. The owner felt that it would be much safer out of her possession for awhile.”
“Why does someone want it so badly?” Willow asked.
Giles answered the witch. “The bracelet has great power, neutral power which can be used either for good or bad, depending on the wearer. Kept safe for several years within the same family, someone outside has learned of its existence. Obviously they want it for themselves.”
Dess continued with her explanation. “Unfortunately, I don’t know the identity of the individual or group that attempted to steal the bracelet. Added to all of this is the fact that there is a very important ritual in eight days that requires use of the bracelet by its owner.”
Buffy shifted in her seat. “Who owns it and when do I give it to her?”
“The bracelet is owned by Aribella Damaris and her family.”
Anya whistled.
“Okay, for us not in the loop, who is Aribella Whoever?” Buffy asked, looking between the elderly woman and Anya, before settling on her friend.
She answered promptly. “One of the most influential demons in North America. Picture someone with half of Bill Gates’ bankbook and all of Queen Elizabeth’s pedigree.”
“Why would we want to give this bracelet back to a demon with that much power to start with? Isn’t it a good thing she doesn’t have it anymore?”
The elderly woman smiled. “She’s very much on our side, isn’t that true Rupert?”
The Watcher nodded. “Through the years the Damaris family has worked with the Council and others in the service of the Powers many times. Then there is the ritual to take into consideration. Quentin mentioned the bracelet held an important position and it would be ruinous if it were not present.”
Spike drummed his fingers on the table. This part of working with the white hats drove him nearly insane with boredom. They had a habit of talking everything to death.
Just shut up with the nattering already. Me and the Slayer can take care of this.
“So we’ll be returnin’ an expensive and powerful bauble to an expensive and powerful demon, when and where?”
Dess reached in a bag, and handed folders to each of them, explaining as she worked. “Ms. Damaris will not actually be given the bracelet in person. She has requested that we return it to her niece, Aria. To further insure not only the bracelet’s safety, but that of her niece, it will be-“.
“Aboard a cruise ship?” Willow held up a brochure. Xander and Anya scooped up their own folders.
“Giles, I can’t possibly leave the shop now, we’re about to have our summer clearance sale in two weeks.”
Giles murmured soothingly to his frantic partner. “Don’t worry Anya; it’s only for five days.”
Spike scowled at the preprinted brochure. “What the bloody hell good can I be aboard a cruise ship? I don’t exactly do ‘fun in the sun.’”
Amused at the varied responses, Dess began with the vampire who had just slammed the brochure closed. “Actually, you’re an integral part of this, Spike.” At his disbelieving look, she spoke earnestly. He was a keystone to the plan. “Please allow me to explain.”
Spike slumped in his seat and nodded.
“Thank you.” She turned to include them all. “Aria is risking a great deal doing this, so they chose the location for the drop to place her in as little danger as possible. This vacation had already been planned for several weeks and a ship is a fairly controlled environment. Also, it would look odd to outsiders if she were to suddenly cancel. You and the Slayer will casually meet her and if it looks like anyone is following her or attempts to hurt her, you’ll both be there. To everyone else Buffy will just be another passenger. No one would expect the Slayer to be vacationing onboard a demon centric cruise ship and a vampire companion and a Grundy will cement the deception.”
“I don’t understand. Demons do cruises? But what about the rest of us? We’re not demons.” Xander looked confused.
“Actually, Xander, demons travel by ship a great deal, especially vampires.”
Dess nodded. “The passengers for the most part will be demons, but mages and other humans will be there. Some of the staff is also human. The ship is specially outfitted so the sun and other problems aren’t an issue and due to the demon proclivity for nighttime the main activities occur after the sun goes down.”
Giles picked up the explanation. “Buffy and Spike will be Aria’s main contacts of course, while the rest of you are backup. It seems that the employees aboard these vessels frequently move around, so the Council was able to unobtrusively secure posts for you.
Xander, you’re a bartender, while we’ve secured a position for Anya working in the onboard store.”
Xander pantomimed holding a gun in each hand. “This is starting to sound pretty cool. I’ll be Sean Connery in Diamonds are Forever.”
Spike snickered. “More like Rowan Atkinson in Johnny English.”
Giles ignored them and continued. “Willow, you’ll work in the ship’s library which will give you access to the computers. I want you to contact me immediately if any problems crop up.”
“Will, that’s perfect for you.” Buffy beamed at her nervous friend. “You know, this could turn out to be a lot of fun. I mean besides the potential danger of our contact getting killed, or one of us getting killed, or someone stealing the bracelet and using it to destroy the world and of course there’s the whole hanging out with a boatload of demons the entire time part. But other than that stuff, it’ll be all about the cruising fun.”
“Yeah, except for all that other stuff, it sounds really great.” A vision of them all floating along aboard the Ship of Fools crossed Willow’s mind. Oh Goddess, that could be us.
“Just how many demons are we talking about?”
Buffy patted her hand.
Giles glanced at his watch. “It’s getting late. Today is Monday and the ship leaves the Port of Los Angeles at four o’clock Friday afternoon. Employees need to arrive on Wednesday. Your instructions are in each individual envelope, along with a check for incidentals including your uniforms.
Since the ship was chosen by Ms. Damaris and she is extremely grateful for the additional security that we’re supplying, she has offered to pay for those incidentals herself, along with expenses incurred while on board. Don’t worry about spending additional money if necessary. That will be all for now.”
As the meeting broke up, Dess turned to the couple rising for patrol. “I can’t tell you both how grateful the Sisterhood and the Damaris family are that you and the Council have taken this on. I’m relieved that it will be in your capable hands. Oh, one more thing. You’ll need to hide any weapons you’ll be bringing inside your Grundy. There’s a no weapons policy aboard the ship. Its part of a treaty each passenger signs to keep the worst demons under control and avoid bloodshed. A Grundy is considered part of the family and will be able to be with you at all times, so you’ll have immediate access to anything stored within her.”
“Not a problem.” Suddenly Buffy’s smile dissolved into utter panic. “Wait, I can’t go.”
Dess stilled. “What’s wrong?”
“I don’t have anything to wear. I don’t think my True Religion jeans are going to cut it, especially at night.”
Relieved that the Slayer hadn’t suddenly changed her mind, Dess smiled. “Not a problem. Actually jeans and very casual clothes are worn during the day. For the evenings, I took the liberty of bringing a few things with me and I’m sure you’ll be able to dig up some additional clothes to enhance your costumes.”
“What’s this about soddin’ costumes?”
“I’m sorry; I forgot to mention that part, there was so much to say. This is a costumed adventure cruise. Passengers are expected to wear appropriate costumes and participate in various activities.”
Giles stared pointedly at them both. “You don’t want to draw attention to yourselves, so you’ll need to participate when necessary. Not to mention that one of those activities might possibly offer the perfect chance to hand over the bracelet unobtrusively.”
Anya held up the brochure she’d been reading avidly. “The cruise is called Floating through history. Every night passengers will be treated to the best of each decade. They begin with the 1980’s and work backward until culminating with the Captain’s Ball set during the ‘40’s.”
Spike grimaced. In his experience, some decades were better than others. The fifties hadn’t been so bad, maybe they’d do Paris. But Spike hated the forties. He had some bad memories from the war years, including a submarine incident with the Slayer’s very own Peaches. He’d have to be careful to keep certain comments and memories to himself. Uneasily, he wondered if anyone he knew would be onboard. Bloody hell.
Listening to Anya reading the brochure out loud, Buffy got the sinking feeling this was going to be a lot more work than she’d thought. She suddenly saw herself dressed as Donna Reed, with Empress tucked under her arm. The Grundy would be sporting a large pink and white polka dot bow that matched Buffy’s frilly Dacron dress. She’d be struggling to win a Betty Crocker Bake off, while trying to keep a strand of seed pearls and the squirming Grundy out of the bundt cake batter. Spike would be sitting in a Barcalounger smoking a cigar and making smart ass comments. Damn.
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