Chapter Five
“Dawn! Dawn, wait!” Buffy ran out of the Great Hall and into the courtyard that still teemed with the Bizarro World’s version of Sense and Sensibility. Slayers were sorting the zombie pieces and piling behind the fencing that now contained the waltzing rotten flesh.
On route to Dawn’s special cave, a place where Xander had found Dawn curled up one day after a particularly vicious fight with the Slayer general, Buffy hazarded a look back at the window of her bedroom, up amongst the medieval turrets.
A flutter of blonde curls quickly disappeared from view. As she jogged out to the edges of the property, Buffy contemplated how her hand had felt on Spike’s breast.
Oh God. Does this mean I’m…lesbian? OH! Willow! Willow can change him back, after she deals with the Scot Zombies and Amy and the injured slayers and…Scot Zombie…sounds like a song….hmmm…oh! Rock Lobster. Oh those weird dolphin sounds! Were they dolphin sounds? I bet that keyboardist was a demon. Rock Zombie! Scot Lobster!
Buffy had reached the cave without even noticing, her legs travelling faster in the anticipation that she’d soon be seeing Spike as soon as she let her sister in on that little detail that Spike was back. Or maybe it was just ‘cause she was singing an eclectic 70s pop song.
****
Spike stayed in Buffy’s room, not wanting the others to know he was Sally. Or that Sally was him. Or that he’d got his memories back. Whatever situation was brought up first. And he was already sick of the pronoun disaster before it really begun, knowing the Whelp and Red.
Now all he had to remember was how he became a girl. He was going to shove a stake so far up Angel’s ass for that stupid crap in LA. Spike just knew Angel’s stint as the Black Thorn groupie had something to do with his current feminine state. God, thinking about the shit Angel had brought down upon his crew, thinking about Fred made Spike’s brain skip a cognitive function and go straight to pure, unadulterated fury.
Spike slammed a fist into the stonemasonry.
Spike looked at his barely bloody fist.
Spike gulped at the dent in the grey stone.
Why the bleeding hell am I at full strength? I’m all with the humanity thanks very much to the Shanshuing the poofta missed out on. Ta for that Black Thorn Poofs. Shit, it’s not like I can vamp any more so what, I’m a hybrid or something? I’ve got a heart beat. There’s no demon in here. Fucking Peaches. I’m going to wring his bloody neck.
So Spike made rash decision #96. He decided to go to his ex-grandsire to find out what the hell had happened during the big last fight they weren’t meant to survive. And what exactly happened to make him female. Even if Angel teased the hell out of Spike. On impulse, Spike began rummaging around Buffy’s drawers to find some unmentionables. He’d need something to sustain him on this trip.
****
“What? No. Huh? No. What?”
“Sally. Is. Spike.”
“What?”
“DAWN! I’ve said it four times. Sally is Spike. Spike is Sally. Spike Sally. Sallike. Spikally. SPIKE!”
Buffy began pacing in front of the giant toe she’d instantly hugged on arrival to Dawn’s hidey hole.
“Are you sure you’re okay? Not mentally damaged or anything from that love spell? ‘Cause you were humming about lobsters when you walked in.”
Buffy sighed, running a hand through her hair before climbing up to sit on Dawn’s ankle.
Dawn pulled her long hair out from her face and shuffled gently so as not to disturb her sister.
“Okay, so Spike was Sally, lost his memory. I don’t know how he got turned to a girl but whatever, he’s back. Alive. With Angel apparently. Angel wouldn’t turn him into a girl would he? I know they had a past…My god that would be ho—I think I’m a lesbian now. Anyway, Spike had no memory and then he kissed me for the spell ‘cause Sally and I were getting really close. Like I we were talking a lot and I was feeling stuff for her and feeling guilty because it was like I was betraying Spike but I wasn’t because Sally remembered she was he when he kissed me. Woah, I’m pretty sure at least one part of that made sense.”
Dawn’s giant eyelids blinked. “You’re a lesbian.”
“Umm, no, not that part.”
Dawn really looked at her sister. Her very happy, overenthusiastic smiling sister. She hadn’t really seen this Buffy for a long time. If ever, cause she was all key-ly the last time Buffy was actually happy. Even if that happiness came with ignorance of childhood.
“Buffy, I really hate to say this, but how do you really know it is Spike?”
Buffy’s eyes widened in shock as she looked up at her little sister. Wasn’t that an oxymoron. Not even the smallest of Dawn’s pores were little anymore.
“I thought you’d be happy he’s back.”
Buffy tried to hold the upset from seeping into her words but Dawn caught it. And as gently as she could, Dawn forged on.
“But he isn’t. A blonde slayer is in your bedroom claiming she is Spike. What if she knew him back in LA? Did you know he was in LA with Angel all last year? Spike came back as a ghost two weeks after Sunnydale. What if Sally is Spike’s girl…a friend…and she has a vendetta against you for continuously breaking his heart?”
“How can you say that? I know she’s Spike!”
“See reason, Buffy. There is every possibility that Sally is not Spike. You shouldn’t let your guard down.”
“No,” she refused to let Dawn sway her and stoutly said, “It is Spike and as soon as you hear Sally talk now you’ll know.”
“Fine, I’ll take you back.” Buffy eagerly climbed into Dawn’s giant palm and braced herself for the windy few giant steps back to the castle.
TBC
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Author's Chapter Notes:
Comic Spoilers still apply. Everyone still with me now we know Spike's little problem? I updated two consecutive days last week so this may not make sense if you haven't read the updates.
Chapter End Notes:
And on with the plot...sort of.