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Chapter 12

Despite the silence filling the house, neither Buffy, nor Spike with his super-keen hearing, could hear the urgent twinkling of her cell phone’s music. In the heat of the moment, it had been discarded and accidentally kicked under the couch, and the sounds were muffled, not that either of them would have noticed in their passion.

Upstairs, Buffy began to squirm in his arms, and Spike, having not slept a wink, tightened his arms around her, as if he feared she might slip away and be lost to him forever.

For a moment, she thought she was waking up from one of her many dreams, but the moment her sensations kicked in, and she felt his arms around her, smelled the scent of him; the scent of their passion, she sighed softly and smiled, pressing her lips against his neck.

“What time is it?” she whispered sleepily.

“Nearly noon, luv,” he whispered. Buffy slowly opened her eyes.

“Why didn’t you wake me up? How long have I been out?”

“Just a couple hours,” he whispered. “You looked like you needed the rest.”

“Is that your way of telling me I look terrible?”

“’Course not,” he replied. “But I figured you’re sleepin’ for two now.”

“Eating for two, sleeping for two, killing demons for two.” She stretched, rolling out of his arms and onto her side, propping herself up on her elbow. He turned his head to look at her, seeing her smiling at him. He’d never felt so happy in his entire life, or unlife, and it was a foreign feeling to him, seeing her looking at him like…like that.

“What?” he wondered, his blue eyes twinkling with curiosity.

“I don’t know. I guess I don’t…I don’t really know what to think right now.”

“That’s your problem, Slayer. Always thinking…always…”

“Hey, there’s nothing wrong with thinking. It worked for…for Einstein.”

“Sometimes, luv, you have to let your heart do the thinking.”

“This coming from someone…”

“Now if you’re going to crack some joke about me not having a beating heart, well…you need to brush up on your insults. It’s been a while.”

“Who said I was going to insult you?” she asked, feeling so much lighter right now. It was amazing what seeing him again—not to mention the fantastic sex—could do for her spirits. Still, she knew it wasn’t all about sex. Sooner or later, they’d have to get serious again and catch up on everything, especially what they were going to do about the not-so-little bun that was apparently trying to punch holes in her oven.

“So…you wanna talk about it, then?”

“Talk about what?”

“The prophecy?”

“We did talk about it.”

“Yeah, but…”

“I don’t want to think about that. I’ll think about that tomorrow,” she said, stopping herself. “Wow, that was very Scarlett O’Hara of me.” Spike raised an eyebrow.

“You know, that movie was so much better on the big screen.” Buffy raised an eyebrow.

“You saw Gone with the Wind?” Spike shrugged his shoulders.

“What of it? Was a good show.”

“Wow, there is so much I don’t know about you.”

“That’s ‘cause ya didn’t take the time to get to know me.” He realized he’d said the wrong thing, when he saw her stiffen a draw away a little. “Sorry, pet. I didn’t mean…”

“Sure you did,” she said quietly. “And you’re right. All you ever were to me was something I had to look out for, make sure you weren’t going to be around the next corner to…you know…bite me, hurt one of my friends, something like that. Until it changed…”

“Yeah,” he said quietly, “but you never trusted me…”

“Until I saw that you changed,” Buffy corrected him. “It’s all different now, Spike. The past is the past, and I wanna leave it that way.”

“You’re sure?”

“Yep. No more late night Buffy and Spike re-runs. Re-runs are boring. Except on Nick-at-Nite. But that’s not even the same anymore.” Spike could only smile at her. He’d had rarely ever seen her behave this way, especially with him, and never after sex. He wondered for a painful moment if she’d been like this with Angel. Or with Captain Cardboard. Or even that love ‘em and leave ‘em whatshisface from Buffy’s early days as a college girl.

“We’ll have to talk about the rest of it sooner or later, Pet.”

“Right, but we have months before we need to deal with it…”

“Those months are going to be spent finding out how to fix this.” His voice was grave. “I lost you once, a long time ago, and after Sunnydale…when I came back? It was like I lost you all over again, because being here, but not being here? Pet, you never wanna know what that’s like.”

“I know. I know what it’s like to be here and feel helpless. I felt that way almost every day when we were training the girls, and after I’d come back. And hey, I was here but not here. Remember when I was invisible?”

“Yeah, you ripped my favorite shirt.”

“The black one’s your favorite. It’s all you ever wear.”

“You’re not gonna try to change my wardrobe, are you?”

“Why would I do that?” She sat up in bed, straightening out the sheets around her, holding her arm around her chest as to not let the sheet fall. She suddenly felt like a teenager again, as his fingers gently traced the arch of her back, sending tingles just about everywhere. She closed her eyes, biting her lower lip. He smiled a crooked smile, and he leaned forward to kiss the places his fingers had run.

“That’s what birds try to do…you know, when they’ve got a fella by the shorthairs.” Buffy eyed him. Fuck. You’ve bloody done it this time. He sighed, his shoulders slumping, as he sat up in the bed next to her. “Sorry, I didn’t mean…”

“What?” She glanced at him, knowing he was just as uncertain about their future as she was. All she knew was that she didn’t want to be without him anymore. There had been too much of that. Even when they’d been together, when it was just sex, it had been very lonely. It had filled up some of the empty spaces in their lives, and it had passed the time, but not being able to share feelings, secrets, innermost desires…that was the loneliest either of them had ever been. She didn’t want that anymore.

“I didn’t mean to assume…”

“Spike,” Buffy said quietly.

“No, I just…I’m trying to…”

“Spike, I think once we’ve gotten past ‘I love you,’ it’s safe to say we can talk about…about ‘us.’” That tiny word. Us. It was just a word, but when she uttered it, she saw his eyes light up for a moment, and he leaned over, kissing her shoulder.

“You know, I don’t think I’m even really here. I think I’m in Hell.” Buffy was suddenly very taken aback and confused. Why couldn’t he just shut up for once?

“So this is Hell for you?”

“No…I…Buffy…I didn’t mean…bloody hell. I meant…I think I’m still dead…or more dead…whatever I was before I came back. I think I’m just being made to think you’re here with me.” She considered his words for a moment. God, how often had she thought, over the past several months, that perhaps she, too, had died and hadn’t really made it out of the Hellmouth. But, after all of the pain she’d gone through fighting demons and trying to carry this mystical human child and keep it as safe as possible, this was surely reality, or at least, a reality to a vampire slayer. Vampire slayer. Wow. If she made it out of this pregnancy alive, and they raised their child, what would they say to him when he asked how they met? Well, Junior, you see, Daddy came to town to kill Mommy, but fate had other plans.” Lame. Shaking her head, she put folded her arms.

“Well, if you’re making me up right now,” she pondered, “what did Xander suggest I name the baby when he found out I was carrying your child?” Spike cocked his head. “No guesses? Well, he suggested Captain Peroxide Jr.”

“Should’ve known. That git’s always tryin’ to…I was dead. Couldn’t have had any respect for the…undead dead?”

“Past, Spike. We’re not thinking about that.”

“You brought it up, luv.” Buffy rolled her eyes and pulled herself out of bed. She tossed the sheet over him, and she started across the room, making a mental note to either wash the bed sheets or leave a nice little note for the couple whose home they were invading, warning them to wash the sheets before having a good night’s sleep.

Spike’s eyes were on her, as she started toward the door.

“Where’re you going…if you’re going to be naked, might as well do it a little closer to me, pet.”

“I have to pee,” she said, suddenly realizing she’d never said something like that in front of him. Her cheeks felt a little warm. Am I blushing? She just couldn’t seem to help herself. It was all new, but so familiar, and she knew that soon, the euphoria would wear off, and they’d be back to business, killing demons and trying to find out how to change the predicted outcome of this pesky prophecy. But there was time for that later. “Being pregnant kind of does that…”

“Say no more,” Spike said, amused and still completely got that she was with him, being so open with him, as if they’d never been mortal enemies. As if he’d been the one she’d always been able to confide in.

He watched her disappear down the hall, and he wondered how much longer he was going to be able to feel this happy before the other shoe dropped, and all he’d have left was the painful nothingness his world had been surrounded with for the past century? She was his only bright light, and the thought of losing her again was almost enough to kill him. But he was going to stop this. He vowed it to himself right then. He would find a way, no matter what.

***

“She’s not picking up. Something’s wrong.”

“I’m sure she’s fine,” Wesley started.

“Wes, you and I both know that Buffy can’t exactly go for a little walk when she’s the slayer. She’s pretty much got a giant target painted on her back. And more than half of the employees in this building would be more than happy to start throwing darts!” Gunn raised his eyebrows and spoke up.

“Wow, did you actually just try to use a metaphor?” He only received a glare from his annoyed boss.

“She’s gone after Spike. We know that much thanks to Harmony.” It hadn’t taken long at all to pry that information from Harmony’s flapping jaw.

“Yeah. And they’re probably just catching up,” Gunn pointed out.

“Not helping, Gunn.” Angel’s eyes darkened. “This says that either her or the baby has to die before it takes its first breath.”

“I thought you said we were gonna find a loophole?”

“I’m trying, but it’s a little hard to think about that when, in a few months, the woman I love is going to give birth to the son of…Spike, and might die because of it.” He tried her cell again, but after three rings, it went right to voicemail. “Damn it.”

“Calm down. I’ll go talk to Harmony and see if somehow I can get her to remember the address she wrote down,” Wesley offered, heading out of the office. Gunn cleared his throat as he went to follow Wesley.

“Just to warn you,” he said in Angel’s direction, “she loves him? We know how he feels about her. Something tells me they’re not gonna want to be interrupted.”





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