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Author's Chapter Notes:
Spike and Xander finally talk and Spike admits he may have made a few mistakes.

I want to make mention to my new Beta Serendipity (Christine) and thank her for getting this chapter back to me so fast, thanks so much hun! Also a huge thanks to Edgehead (Mel) for the awesome banner.
Chapter 15

Mending bridges

1 Week later

Spike walked into his apartment tossing his keys on the kitchen table, he sighed dropping his bags to the floor. Looking around it seemed like no one was home, he just hoped that Xander hadn’t moved out, he knew now that it was unfair to react the way he did five weeks ago when Cordy had announced her relationship with Xander.

He didn’t give himself time to adjust to the news or them time to explain the whole situation. After Buffy and Xander had left, Jenny had forced Spike and Cordy into the kitchen together telling them that neither of them would get a single Christmas present until they worked things out.

After about an hour of more arguing they finally calmed down and actually talked. Spike asked her questions and she had answered calmly and honestly. After talking for maybe two hours, Spike finally realised he had messed everything up.

He was scared Xander was taking advantage of his younger sister but he soon realised two things: one, Cordy was not a kid any more and two, Xander and Cordy were deeply and madly in love with each other.

Who was he to stand in the way of their happiness?

He had apologized as his sister held him, close whispering how much she loved him and how she didn’t mean it when she said she hated him, and then she had brought up Buffy. He had simply said nothing ever would come of it and that was that, she hadn’t wanted to push it any further.

She said she would talk to Xander and smooth things out, but Spike had decided it was better if it came from him, asking her just to tell Xander they would talk when he got home. Just then, Xander popped his head out of the hall way.

“Permission to approach?” Xander smiled, still unsure even though Cordy had told him Spike wasn’t angry any more

“Permission granted mate,” Spike smiled. Xander visibly sighed in relief as he moved towards him. “I’m sorry I over reacted.”

“I’m sorry I kept the relationship from you, but make no mistake this isn’t some fling... I love her man one hundred percent.” Spike nodded

“I get that now, I do and don’t get me wrong, I’m pretty pissed that you have been running around with Cordy for over a year without me knowing but I get why you did it too and not to sound like a grandpa but I need to know what your intentions are... long term.”

“I’m going to marry her,” Xander stated simply. Spike nodded pulling Xander close and hugging him, stepping back after a few seconds.

“I wanted to tell you but she was scared that you would try and keep us apart.”

Shaking his head, Spike felt warm tears rise up fighting them away he sat at the table sighing. “Great, I feel so much better. My sister to scared to tell me she is in love because I’m so bloody jaded.” Xander sighed, sitting down in the chair across from him.

“you're not jaded.”

“Aren’t I? I threw a perfectly good thing away with Buffy because I was scared of getting hurt again.”

“You're in love with Buffy.” It was more of a statement than a question

“I tried not to, even after I found out she was only sixteen I fought it but she crept in, seeped into my every single core and I can’t seem to get her out... I don’t want to, but god knows I do... I love her, I’m in love with her.” Xander smiled, relived he had finally admitted it.

“So what are you doing here?”

“I can’t tell her after what I have put her through... I don’t deserve her.”

“Maybe, maybe not, but you want her right?”

“God yes”

“It’s clear she wants you too so...” Xander smiled, casting his eyes to the door. Smiling, Spike grabbed his keys and ran out the door.

He had a girl to find.

Pulling up in front of the Summers house, he had gotten back to Sunnydale in record time, breaking most of the speed limits along the way. He couldn’t help it, he needed to see her, to tell her that he loved her and that he was sorry for being such a prat. Moving up the front steps he banged on the door, he was so excited to finally be here, he could feel his skin tingling, his blood pumping and his heart hammering in his chest. He smiled as the door opened to see Joyce standing there.

“Miss Summers, is Buffy home?”

“You're William aren’t you? Cordilia’s brother?”

“Yes ma'am”

“I’m sorry William, but Buffy no longer lives here.” Spike felt all the blood run from his face

“What? Well do you know where I could find her?”

“I’m afraid I can’t give out that information, I’m sorry but Buffy has moved away to get some time alone and she has asked that I not tell anyone where she is.” Joyce explained.

“Oh god, what have I done?” he whispered, feeling sick to his stomach.

“Why are you looking for Buffy? I thought you barely knew each other?” Joyce asked, confused.

“Um... Well you see, the thing is...” Spike began, stammering and it occurred to Joyce then, the timing was right after all.

“You slept with her didn’t you?” Joyce spat.

“Please understand Miss Summers I lo...” he started

“If you are who I think you are then just stay the hell away from Buffy, she wants nothing to do with you.” Joyce hissed, before slamming the door in his face.

Spike felt his heart break, he had lost her forever. He couldn’t believe she had moved away from Sunnydale just to escape him, not that he could blame her after what he had put her through. Tears ran down his checks as he realised he had lost the woman he loved forever and he had no one to blame but himself.


Chapter End Notes:
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