Spike was laying on his bed, going over everything that had happened today. First, he'd spent half of the day blending in with everyone and not one person stopped him for an autograph, and no screaming fans chasing him for miles. He was extremely happy about that. It was a nice change of pace, and he thought that he should do it more often, too. Something as mundane as a day out on the town meant more to him than he could even explain. It was fun. It was different. It was freedom.
Then, there was Buffy Summers.
She was incredible. No woman, since Drusilla, had made such a first impression on him. Most women, they threw themselves all over him, groupies wanting to have sex. Fans wanting their 5 minutes with him. Of course, he wouldn't say no to the odd hot brunette that came around looking for a little slap and tickle, but it wasn't often. But Buffy, she knew exactly who he was, knew how famous he was, and yet... she just carried on a conversation with him as if he was a normal guy. Someone she had met randomly, and was forming a friendship (or possibly some thing more...) with, and it filled him with amazement. It was another different thing that he wanted to grab and hold onto for as long as he could.
He pulled out the little gum wrapper Buffy had printed her name and number on, playing with the edges with his thumb and memorizing the number. He knew he would call her, but now it was a matter of waiting. He didn't want to call too early and freak her out, but he didn't want to make her think he wasn't interested by waiting too long.
He hated this part.
Spike had been out of the dating game for so long, he didn't know how to continue. The last person he was with, serious and long term, was Drusilla. That ended badly, too. Not in a 'It's not you, it's me' way, but a 'My girlfriend died in a horrible car accident, now I'm picking the pieces of my broken heart back up' way.
It had been a long time since he lost Drusilla, almost two years. He had spent a while drowning himself in liquor, not letting himself mourn her. He'd thought that if he just ignored the pain, refused to acknowledge the fact that she was actually gone, she would come back, she wouldn't be dead.
That wasn't the case, and he was glad he had Xander, Oz and Wesley to pull him out of his funk and teach him how to live again.
He still felt pain when he thought about Drusilla, still ached for her lips on his, the feel of her skin, the scent of her hair... but he knew that he would never have that again. He also knew that she would want him to be happy, to move on. He wanted to be happy, too. He didn't want to live pining for something he couldn't have. He knew a part of him would always love and cherish Drusilla's memory, but he wanted someone to be with. He wanted and needed someone he could put his arms around, someone he could kiss, someone to love that was able to love him back.
Maybe Buffy could be that girl.
'Only one way to find out, mate...'
As soon as Buffy got in from school, she deleted the school's message to her mother, stating that she had skipped a class, and then went to her room. She immediately switched on her stereo, playing the newest Adrenaline Rush CD and flopped down into her seat in front of her laptop. She switched it on and signed onto her Yahoo! Messenger.
WiccaWillow: Heya, Buff! How was your day of leisure?
Buffy had started to type in her experience with Spike, but she decided to delete it all. She didn't want to share that with anyone. Not even her best friend. She wanted to have it as some sort of special secret, something she could have for herself,_and cherish. She knew Spike would never call her, so she had no way to prove it anyway. Buffy knew Willow would believe her, but Buffy didn't want to tell her. She deleted what she typed first, and instead wrote:
Buffster: It was okay. It got pretty boring after a while, so I decided to just go back to school. Sorry I didn't see you after, I just wanted to get home as fast as I could.
WiccaWillow: It's okay, Buffy. I understand. So, what are you doing tonight? Gonna wait by the phone, see if a member of the band is going to call you and say you won the contest?
'Oh yeah, the contest...' Buffy thought, finding herself not as excited over it as she had been. She had had her chance to hang out with Spike, and to win the contest would be amazing, but she wouldn't be disappointed if she didn't win either.
Buffster: Nah, probably not. Just going to do some homework, I suppose.
WiccaWillow: Wow, really? I thought that you would be excited to see if you won or not...
“Crap. Think cover up, Buffy. You can do this,” Buffy said into the empty room and rolled her eyes. “You can lie to your best friend...”
Buffster: Yeah, but what if I did win? It's not like Mother Dearest would let me go anyway, what with her being all Prison Warden lately. Maybe I'm just fated to live a concertless life. I don't want to get my hopes up.
WiccaWillow: Aww, I'm sure you will have your chance to see them in concert sometime. Besides, I'm going to do the luck spell as soon as I sign off, maybe that will help you win the contest. If not, maybe it will get your mother to loosen up with her strictness.
Buffster: No, it's okay Willow. You don't have to do anything. It's fine, really.
There was a long pause, and Buffy started to panic. Had she gone too far with the 'I don't really care' attitude?
WiccaWillow: Okay, Buffy... who are you, and what have you done with my friend? You are acting like this is nothing, but I know you still want to go to the concert. It's ADRENALINE RUSH! You know, our all time favorite band? What happened today to make you suddenly not care?
'And you're busted!' Buffy's inner voice chided. Maybe she should just tell Willow. It wasn't like Willow would tell everyone. Maybe this secret was too big of a deal to keep to herself. “You're in for a big surprise, Willow!” she giggled, suddenly feeling excited to tell her best friend what had transpired today.
Buffster: Okay, Wills. Something did happen, but you have to promise not to tell ANYONE, okay?
WiccaWillow: *bounces excitedly* Ohh yay! Secret time! Spill!
Buffy took a deep breath, preparing herself.
Buffster: I met a guy.
'That’s it? You're not going to write more than that? Holy anticlimax...' she thought to herself as she waited for Willow to reply.
WiccaWillow: Okay... Details? Please...?
Buffster: Well, he is incredibly cute.
WiccaWillow: Yeah...
Buffster: He has a British accent.
WiccaWillow: Ohh, very Spike-esque! Go on.
Buffster: lol, very Spike-esque.
WiccaWillow: You're withholding information, Missy! Get with the story telling, or I'm coming over there to... do something of the violent variety!
Buffster: Okay, okay! lol jeez. It’s a long story, so let me type it out. Actually, can you call me?
Just as Buffy pushed enter, the phone began to ring.
Buffster: That was quick.
She got up to get the phone, and sat down at her computer again. “Hi, Wills. Okay, you ready?” she said cheerily.
WiccaWillow: I haven't called you yet.
Buffy's jaw dropped as she read Willow's last message. 'Then who...'
“Who's Wills, luv?” Spike asked, his voice deep and curious.
Buffster: OMG, brb. He called me! *squeee*
TBC