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Author's Chapter Notes:
Same old excuses! Still having internet problems, my week off work went in a flash with little time for writing, but I finished it, then the internet would let me surf but not upload or download anything...anyway finally the final Chapter! Extra long so I hope that makes up for the wait. I had the idea for this story years ago, and I never thought I could actually pull it off, and the fact that it’s finished not only makes me proud, but very grateful to everyone that read and commented. Cannot tell you how much I love the fact a single person would bother reading something I write, never mind so many. If I could turn this little hobby into a job I would never be such a bad updater, because it’s never my love for writing that gets in the way, its just life!



The windows were only tinted to stop the outside looking in, but she still couldn’t see, the sun was too bright. It wasn’t worth screwing her eyes up to squint a view; she knew there was nothing to see. The place wasn’t important, only the person waiting there was. It had been so many years, so many years waiting for this day and it was finally here. She felt like everything in all this was blurred, it didn’t seem real. It was as if in her new life, the one that she’d come to know, the one that she’d found comfort and safety in, she’d read a book, a fairly good book, an exciting book, one with romance and drama and angst. But now that she’d read it and been forced to put it in a draw, now that she’d closed the last chapter she’d suddenly been transported back into it, and it was her romance and her drama and her angst, and the last Chapter hadn’t been that, it’d been the lead up to this, and she would have to decide how it ended.

As the car bumped along the unused roads she wondered how long it would take to get there, how long she would have to think about all this, as if 6years hadn’t been long enough. But the thing was she knew her own mind, and sure she’d be swayed by whatever feeling came over her when she saw him, but she’d already made her decision.

Spike was already there, waiting. The meeting place was an abandoned farm, abandoned as far as he could tell, but to be honest with his limited knowledge it could easily be very much in use, there was just nobody here. It was too hot, baking almost, the car was air conditioned and fresh, but he was stood in the open. His expression was calm, but underneath he was revelling in the fact he was allowed outside. Although he wished he was alone he knew why the agent with him was here, for his own protection, and hers, and the guy was nice enough to give him his space, space enough to breathe.

He lit up a cigarette, a habit only made worse over the last few years, but he needed it now more than ever. His chest ached with anticipation, and as much as he loved the smell of the open air, the farm yard off in the distance, the land that spread out with no fences for miles around him, it almost felt overwhelming, and as silly as it sounded he had to concentrate on not suffocating from it.

He was wearing sunglasses, but the sun still scorched his eyes a little, he wasn’t used to this heat, this amount of sun. He sucked on his cigarette again, his lungs filled with the smoke and it did all he expected it could do to calm him down. His heartbeat was loud in his own ears and even as he leaned against the car he fidgeted in discomfort as soon as his back hit the side. He walked a little and sat on the trunk instead; still uncomfortable he looked down, staring at the dirt, kicking the dry earth with the toe of his boot.

When her car pulled up he didn’t hear it, even though its tyres crackled along the hard stones on the ground as it approached. It parked away away, the driver wanting to give her some time before she had to go and join him.

She opened up her door and stepped out into the blistering heat. The smell was familiar to her, even though she’d driven far this was the kind of place she’d come to know the past few years, rural and peaceful, the smell of grass and dirt, the land and nothing else for miles. It steadied her a little, but only a little. She took a breath of the warm air and felt better, better still when the door behind her opened as well. She felt his presence behind her and that gave her some of her confidence back.

Her hair was glistening, but it wasn’t the golden blonde it had once been, it was dark, a muddy brown, and it hung long, longer than she’d ever had it before, sleek and straight and comfortable around her face. She was in her everyday clothes, something she might go to work in, jeans, a small white top and a beige cardigan which draped loosely around her body but hugged her arms and shoulders. Here on a day like today she didn’t need it, but she hadn’t known where they would be going.

She looked up in front of her and saw him then. He wasn’t facing her, but she knew it was him. Even his dark curled hair and stockier shoulders couldn’t disguise him. She’d thought about how different he’d look and she wasn’t wrong, but she longed to see his face, she knew she’d see the real change in him there. She’d see the hardness or weariness after what he’d gone through, or what she hoped for the most, she’d see the same features shining underneath that she remembered, and that would tell her that he was still himself under it all.

He drew his hand through his hair, his wasn’t dark by choice, but it wasn’t worth the hassle trying to get his hands on the dye, or the hassle from the other inmates. He didn’t want to draw too much attention, he’d kept his head down enough that he hadn’t been caught out for bad behaviour, but he’d got his fair share of warnings, enough that the message got around that he wasn’t easy prey. He knew his name wouldn’t be alien to anyone inside, but that wouldn’t help, because along with who he was everyone also knew why he’d got his reduced sentence, and that didn’t gain him any favours, so he had to keep his eyes open and his head clear for the first year, beating down anyone that tried to challenge him, sometimes metaphorically. With that thought he stopped dwelling over his time inside, he’d have to relive it all too soon anyway, he knew she would ask about it and he couldn’t lie to her.

Buffy was about to shout out to him when the man behind her, Owen spoke. She was silently glad because she didn’t know what she would have said anyway, and she also feared that even if she had followed through and tried to shout him that her voice would have choked out on her, but Owen’s question she could deal with.

“Are you okay, Dawn?” he asked her softly.

She turned around to him, nodded and smiled warmly, it wasn’t a reflection of what was going on inside her, but she was fond of Owen and she didn’t want him to worry more than he already had to about her. He seemed on edge still, looking here and there, it was his job to scan the area, but his eyes weren’t taking anything in because he was too worried about her she could tell, so she grabbed his arm gently to ground him, and he relaxed.

Just then at their connection, her hand squeezing his arm, she thought of Spike, and what he would think if he saw. She looked over her shoulder and checked to see if he had turned and caught the exchange between them. He was turning around, but he hadn’t yet and she was glad he hadn’t seen the affection she showed another man, because she didn’t want to upset or confuse him before they had had a chance to talk.

He looked around and saw her, saw how plain she looked, a different woman from the girl he had met all those years ago. Her hair was the first striking thing of course, it did make her fade a little into the background, made her look a little older, but it suited her so well, it made her look complete. Like her hair her clothes weren’t flashy or showy anymore, but more than that, they didn’t accentuate her body, but they didn’t hide it. They were comfortable, flattering, subtle; they didn’t scream confidence like a short skirt or a bold colour would, they whispered it, that she knew herself, she was self assured and independent. It wasn’t just her clothes but her general appearance, the stance she had in front of him, and all the agents. She wasn’t nervous, or naïve anymore, she didn’t stand out because she didn’t need to stand out.

Her beautiful face was the only thing about her that at least resembled what she had been, but even that was covered in new signs of time that he hadn’t expected. There were lines around her eyes, worry lines, she still looked great, but she looked resigned, resigned to where she was, her lot in life. It wasn’t a bad thing, in fact it made him a little nervous. However hard her life was in a new place, or however unfulfilled without him she was, she was settled, and he didn’t know if that meant there was room for him, even if she still missed him. He hadn’t thought that she’d look this different, he just hadn’t. Even though it had only been a few years, it seemed a lot longer now she was stood in front of him. The gap between them seemed so vast.

He was sure the changes ran more deep than her appearance, he’d guessed them all, but he would never know for sure until they spoke. There was a worry that he wouldn’t or couldn’t fit into her life, even though she had agreed to meet him and talk about it, deep down he knew she would have met him either way. She wasn’t the type to brush him off even if she had made the decision to move on from him; she could just be here to tell him in person, it was the reason his heart was beating so fast, but there was another feeling, relief.

In seeing her, he knew what he felt for her wasn’t a puppy love, neither was it brought on by their circumstances, or grown out of his guilt. It was solid and deep and true, a friendship, seeing her he felt home. The feeling of relief was to see her well, to have her back to him whatever the outcome afterwards, a missing part of him found safe and he felt calm and happy even if he had to leave her again. Buffy felt it too, but he didn’t know; they didn’t get a chance to feel anything but their own emotions. She closed the car door and stepped away from it. When he moved to say whatever it was that would have been the first moment between them, an approach or a hello, or even a smile, a shot rang out, and she hit the floor.


* * * * *

Spike had ducked, but a moment later he was stood again, one of his agents had run from the side of the road and was now in front of him blocking his body, poised holding a gun. If he’d thought for a second he would have known the agent was protecting him from the next inevitable shots, but at that point in time he was only angry that the man was holding him firmly down so that he couldn’t stand and look over the car to where Buffy was, so he pushed him aside and ran around it. He thought he’d seen her hit the floor, the imagine was burned into his mind, the shot going off and her landing with a loud thud, he had to know if she was alright.

He kept himself low, knowing that the shooter would try again, and try again they did. Spike crouched around the back of his car until another shot went off and then dared to look over to her. She was laid on her stomach on the floor, but her eyes were alert and glued in his direction. Her agent was crouched in front of her, his hand on her so that she wouldn’t follow her instincts and run out into the open, she was safest behind him until he could locate where the shots were coming from and find the correct direction of cover.

Spike took in the picture for a second and then it hit him that she wasn’t hurt, that her agent, whether he was simply a cop or in fact more likely her contact in witness protection had pushed her to the ground. She had a graze on her forehead where she must have hit the gravely dirt of the road, but apart from that she was fine.

He rushed towards her then without thinking, without waiting for a break in shots. He was probably doing the most stupid thing, but he had to be near her. Just then the agent in front of Buffy fell, a bullet pierced his chest and he hit the car with a bang like a thunderclap. Spike ran, grabbed Buffy by the shoulders and pulled her up. He didn’t know if the man was dead or not, he wasn’t moving but that didn’t mean anything. To Spike however he had a one track mind and it was his focus to get Buffy out of there first before he checked on anyone else. She reached out for the man on the floor, tears tracing tracks down the dirt on her face, but he felt her body sag with emotion and it allowed him the leeway he needed to pull her away, around the back of her car and out of the firing line. For now the bullets stopped, but Spike knew they only had a few minutes, and being behind a car filled with petrol wasn’t a safe place to stay.

“Are you hurt?” he turned to her, panicked.

She looked startled and couldn’t speak, he would have been more gentle with her if they had had the time, but they didn’t, so he shook her and shouted the question once more.

She shook her head, knowing he needed an answer, tears filling her eyes again, unable still to speak.

“Can you run?” he asked.

She nodded.

That’s when he grabbed her and pulled her close, hugging her tighter than he ever had, never more scared to lose her, but she didn’t understand fully why until he let her go, holding her at arms length, staring her down and said, “You run into the woods towards the barn and find cover.” And then she understood, he wasn’t coming with her when she ran.

“No, Spike.” she said almost hysterical, “We can both make it.”

He shook his head firmly, “They’re after me. They probably don’t even know who you are, you’re in witness protection and only a handful of people know about this. They’ve followed me and found you by chance, and the quicker you get away from me the more time it’ll take them to catch on to who you are.”

“You think they don’t know who I am?” she asked confused.

He was about to answer when a shot fired and hit the tyre of the car they hid behind; there was a pop and the car slumped slightly as it deflated. After that the shots at them subsided, the agents had started firing back equally and had become the targets themselves. For now.

He started again, knowing he had to make himself clear before he had any chance of getting through to her, “I’m saying, I think they were sent after me.” he said, “They wouldn’t have a clue you were headed to see me, so if you run now they won’t recognise you.” He turned away to look at the distance on his left and right and under his breath she heard him say, “I mean who would.”

It was ridiculous, how in the midst of everything she could be mad, but she was. What was that supposed to mean?

He caught the angry glare that she was sending him once he looked back from scanning first her escape and then his own. “What?”

“Nothing.” she snapped.

Despite his racing mind it took him only a few seconds to catch on, “Jesus, Buffy really? You’re going to make me explain myself while we’re being shot at?”

She shook her head, she knew it was stupid and she felt bad, but he could see she was still upset.

He put a finger under her chin, moved closer to her, his boots scraping on the ground and looked her straight in the eyes. “You look fantastic, luv. Better than I could have imagined, and it’s something I’ve imagined a lot.” And before she could let that sink in he kissed her full and hard on the mouth, and then he placed his forehead on hers and begged her to run into the thicket on their left.

Eventually she relented, after he begged, and pleaded, and promised he would join her there soon, but mostly because he asked her to trust him.

She ran, heart in her throat, she couldn’t tell whether it was her heart beating or bullets hitting things that kept a rhythm to her steps, but something made her run faster. She slid her way into the woods like sliding into first base on a playing field. Dust flew in the air and then nothing, she was hidden, for the time being behind some bushes and she took a few minutes to collect herself and look back to Spike. He’d already started moving in the other direction. It seemed he was right and the shots followed him, luckily not too close. She took no comfort in that, and instead turned to look for the barn.

She made herself pick up her feet and run again. Her heart had calmed, but as soon as she was in the open she felt the panic once more. The adrenaline was coursing, but she still felt pain every time she sucked in a breath because she did it too fast and too desperately.

As Spike reached an out building and ran behind it he looked back and saw two agents. One of them was still behind his car, gun pointed and firing in the direction of the shots, the other was by Buffy’s taking the pulse of the man Buffy and him had seen shot. It must have been good news even though he still wasn’t moving, because after a short pause he began to pull him into cover.

Spike’s plan had worked and he had drawn their fire away from Buffy, but he didn’t have anywhere to go, he was trapped and until the agents did their jobs or failed he wasn’t going anywhere, and he couldn’t make it to her.

Buffy reached the barn in what seemed to feel like hours but was probably seconds. She pushed the heavy wooden doors opened, but stood there dumb for a few minutes while she tried to get her brain to work out the best thing to do.

After a while she turned and closed the doors behind her to cover her entrance, then she ran to the ladder she saw in front of her and climbed it into the hay loft. Her hands were shaking and she felt like she could slip at anytime. She blew out deep breaths to keep her whole body steady and concentrated all her efforts on her assent. When she reached the top she hauled herself up and turned around. She tried to pull the ladder up with her, but at first it was too heavy for her to dislodge, it took a few tries but eventually she got it off the ground, she pulled it up a bit at a time, but all in all it was too much and it clattered to the floor. Resigned she covered herself in hay and shadows and lay waiting.

Back at the cars, Spike was still hiding behind the wall, he couldn’t tell where the agents had been firing, but they seemed focused enough to allow him the belief they had found the shooter. They had exchanged shots, first them then the shooter, and eventually everything had stopped. The agents beckoned Spike over and he ran behind the car where they were now stood rather than hiding.

“Are we okay now?” he asked, his blood thumping in his veins in case it wasn’t over.

The agent who had been in Buffy’s car ran over to the bushes in front of them.

“Are we okay?” Spike repeated. The agent next to him said nothing, but he held a hand up to his earpiece so he could listen carefully to it.

The agent now in the bushes must have said something to him, because he then turned to Spike. “We took a shooter down. This place is secure now, but we think there’s another.”

“Another shooter?” Spike was confused, “Then why isn’t he still firing at us?”

He didn’t answer, Buffy’s agent was emerging from the bushes and Spike could hear him radioing for an air ambulance. The one next to him then asked him which way Buffy had gone. The urgency in his voice made Spike catch up to them quickly. Once he was on the same page he bolted, bolted for the barn and the direction Buffy had ran.


* * * * *

Spike’s instinct was to shout her name, but he knew better. He sped his way through the tall grass until he could see the barn in the distance. His worst fear realised when he saw a man entering it with a gun. His heart stopped and for a moment so did his feet. Then a beat later her was pushing himself forward, “I’m coming.” he whispered.

Buffy’s arms itched, her legs too. In fact her whole body itched from the prickly sticks of hay, she couldn’t breathe either. She decided she couldn’t stand it any longer and shook it away from her face, planning to cover herself again after a few deep breaths, but it was too late.

The doors flew open, 10 times easier then when she had entered. She could see a man, but only his bottom half. As she tried to rack her brain for what Spike had been wearing that day the man stepped forward and she saw his face, his face that clearly did not belong to Spike, or anyone else she knew.

She was frozen, and the memory of that day in the bank flashed in her mind. At least she’d tried to run that day, this time there was nothing to do. Any movement would draw his attention. There was no way down, it was too high to jump from unaided, and even if she did he blocked the nearest exit. Her only hope was that he wouldn’t look up and see her, but just then he did.

Their eyes locked, half in the hay, half hidden, but her eyes stood out brightly either way. She kept his gaze wondering what his next move would be, but when he smiled at her it reminded her of Angel’s smile and she knew she no longer wanted to know.

She got up and made to run, maybe she could make a jump for one of the wooden frame posts if she ran around to the other side of the loft. She didn’t make it very far before he aimed his gun.

“Not so fast, Buffy.”

She stopped.

“It is Buffy, right?” he laughed, “I hope so, I’d hate to kill the wrong girl…Actually it’s not the worst thing I’ve done.”

That she believed.

He tilted his head, uncocked his gun, and Buffy shut her eyes tight. Waiting for the inevitable she dreamed up thoughts of Spike; their last night together, their happy last few days in his house, and with those thoughts her body stopped tensing. Suddenly she felt relaxed and unafraid. She just wished he was here so she could tell him what she’d decided to do about them. Not that it would change anything now, but he deserved know.

Then came the noise.

Buffy’s body flinched, but not because of the pain she expected, because that never came. For a second she wondered if that’s what it felt like to die, painless, but the noise hadn’t been what she expected either, something didn’t add up. Her eyes shot open in realisation, and she saw her shooter laid on the floor, blood across his face, unconscious, and Spike was stood over him holding the barrel of the gun in his right hand.

He looked up and saw her staring.

Feeling worried, not knowing if she was in shock or just horrified at his violent actions he spoke, “He’ll be okay, I just hit him with it. He’s just out cold.”

She continued to stare, expressionless.

“He was going to shoot you, I had to.” he justified.

She shook her head, realising what his assumptions of her behaviour were. A tear slipped down her cheek as she tried to pull herself together. She pulled her hands up to cover her face; she couldn’t believe she was okay, that they were both okay, and just when Spike had resigned himself to the fact that he’d completely shocked her, she smiled. She smiled from ear to ear until he saw, understood, and smiled back.

The next second she was running to the other side of the loft and a second after he ran to stand underneath her so she could jump safely into his arms.

She fell awkwardly into him, but eventually slid down to stand on her own two feet, relaxed, still in his embrace and clinging onto him.

“I thought I’d lost you for good, baby.” he whispered into her hair.

She hugged him tighter to remind him he hadn’t.

“I missed you,” she confessed, “everyday. I want you to come home with me.”

He pulled away and looked at her straight on, cupping her cheek, “Are you sure?”

She nodded. “I’ve thought about it over and over, and I don’t want it any other way.”

He pulled her into him, and she lay her head on his chest. He rocked them slightly until she almost forgot where they were. That was until the agents ran in. They slowed when they saw the situation, taking only seconds to put together what had happened.

“We need to get you two out of here as soon as possible,” one of them said. “just tell the drivers where you want them to go Miss Summers.”

“It’s Dawn,” Buffy corrected, “What about, Owen?” she asked concerned, noticing, but temporarily ignoring the raised eyebrow she was getting from Spike.

“Special Agent Thurman is on route to the hospital. He was wearing a vest, but it was partially damaged by the bullet. Mostly he got the wind knocked out of him, but it’s a clean shot, he should be fine. You’ll be kept informed once your home.” He finished then went outside to call for backup.

“How long will people be?” Spike asked the other agent, who was now crouched next to the still unconscious shooter.

“Teams were already in place as a precaution, so they’ll just need a few minutes to mobilise.”

He looked awkwardly back at Buffy, realising in their time of waiting he would have to ask one of his questions sooner or later, before it drove him mad. “So who’s Owen?” He tried to be casual about it, but didn’t quite pull it off.

“Don’t worry, he just my person.”

“Person?”

“Yeah. You know, my witness protection guy. I guess yours too now.” she smiled and he forgot all about the question just as she’d planned.

The agent came back in, “There are people on their way to your vehicles; they should be there by the time you are.”

They moved awkwardly out of the way and he turned to her. “So, Dawn, huh?”

She smiled back carefully, shyly, “What? You don’t like it?”

“It suits your new look.” he said twirling a strand of hair around his finger for a moment. “Very grown up.” He caught her eyes and saw she wasn’t satisfied with that, “And very beautiful.” he followed, smirking.

She laughed, and it was great to hear her laugh. “I’m not the only one who abandoned the blonde.” she said matter of factly.

“Mine wasn’t by choice though, kitten. And I don’t like it. It’s not me at all.”

She thought for a moment then agreed.

He dropped the hair he’d been playing with suddenly and considered something, “Do I need a new name?”

She laughed again surprised, one of the agents pushed past them and then she realised he was waiting for a real answer. “Hmm,” she said stringing it out, “well ’Spike’ isn’t really going to fit in where I live…It’s a small town…” she thought for a while, “How about something like William, or James?”

Spike immediately pulled a face, “Not very dangerous sounding, luv.”

She frowned, “I think I’ve had enough danger to last me a life time.”

He knew it wasn’t a dig, but it also wasn’t a lie either so he said, “I’ll think about it.”

“I’d appreciate that.” she said, smiling again.

They started to walk towards the door together, and after a while he couldn’t hold the question in any longer, “So what am I going to do?” he asked, “In this small town of yours? Seen as you’ve given it so much thought.”

She didn’t look at him, she smiled a little and swung her arms as she walked beside him, “Well, I’ve been thinking about that for a while,” she said coyly, ignoring the drama around them.

“And?” he pressed.

“Well I thought my kids might need a…”

Spike stopped in his tracks, “Kids?! You have kids?!”

She was utterly confused for a minute, stopped and stared at him, and then she realised where his mind had gone, and although it was her fault she laughed, big and loud. Spike was horrified. This wasn’t funny, he felt angry, confused, hurt.

After a while she turned back to him, “I’m a school teacher Spike not a mom!”

He’d never heard her laugh so much, but he was still slightly stunned and it allowed her the time to really get the giggles.

After a while it started to bother him that she was still laughing at his gaff, and he started glaring at her.

She stopped herself then, “I mean my school kids.” she reaffirmed, holding back her grin.

He kept quiet for a while, she started to pout, waiting for him to forgive her for laughing, eventually he huffed, “What about them?”

She took his arm in hers, smiling and lead him forwards to start their walk again, “Well, like I said it’s a small town,” she said, “and there isn’t really anyone who knows anything about music or art. It might be nice to give the kids someone who does.”

Spike thought about that, rolling it over in his mind for a long time. He didn’t answer her, tell her if he thought it was a good idea, all he did was smile, lean down to her head and kiss her hair as they walked.

Later when they got to the cars he suddenly stopped, he looked at his, and then at hers. There was no sign that anything had gone on in that place apart from a deflated tyre, the wounded man had been taken away and everything else had happened too far away to see. Stood there in that piece of dry nothing land it felt as if today hadn’t even happened. He dropped her arm and she immediately looked up at him to see why.

Nothing in his expression particularly gave him away, but she eventually understood him when she looked in front of them. Agents were stood back at their cars, ready to take them off separately again if that’s what they had decided. She couldn’t see how scared he was, but she felt it radiating off him.

Quickly so not to leave him hanging she took his arm again, pulled him to the car with all 4 wheels and opened the door for him. They were going together; she thought she’d made that clear. “I told you already.” she said kissing his cheek then getting in.

He wanted to be cool, but he couldn’t hide his grin as he climbed in behind her.

They sat there for a long time, and he took her hand. “I love you.” he said, knowing to have said it sooner might have pressured her.

“I love you too.” she echoed back, snuggling up to him and laying her head on his chest like before in the barn. His heartbeat rapidly becoming her new favourite song to listen to.

She felt him shift and looked up at him, “What?” she asked concerned.

He had the hint of a smile at her worry, “You’ve just never said that before that’s all.”

She looked a little hurt, so he put a hand up to her face, his fingertips ghosting across her cheek, “I knew you did. It’s just the first time you’ve said it to me like that.”

Buffy’s frown softened and she laid her palm against his chest, “You’ll just have to forgive me for that.”

“If not today, then I’ll forgive you tomorrow.” he said, squeezing her hand. It was the first tomorrow he’d ever truly believed in.

THE END




Chapter End Notes:
Hope people liked! I know some readers don’t like a time jump, but I couldn’t see it any other way…It helped a bit of ambiguity, I wanted you to wonder at least a little if they would end up together. Anyway that’s it! It’s the last you’ll hear from this story, but not the last you’ll hear from me so please watch this space as they say!



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