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Author's Chapter Notes:
A/N: Of all the chapters I am writing, this one was by far both a joy, and a pain to write. It is in two parts because to tell the whole plot to this in one chapter would be way too long. I should be able to post the next part in a couple of days.

In this chapter, we see Spike's desire for Buffy getting stronger, and we also find out about why she took Riley's ring.
CHAPTER 15 PART ONE

Spike woke that afternoon, feeling a lightness that he had never felt before. Usually, he didn't allow himself to be plagued by the happier emotions. After all, he didn't have many things to be happy about. But each day he saw HER, the beastly looking vampire found that he thought less about his demonic self, and more in touch with his alter ego, William.



There was no doubt about it; Buffy brought out the best in him, so much so that he decided that today would be the day he would ask her to be with him. Oh, he knew his demon raged within him to make her his childe, his Mate for all eternity. But his inner William wanted Buffy the way she was. He wanted her innocence in tact, and her willingess to accept him without judging him. It was the thing that called to him unlike any other force imaginable.


Spike started toward the table with his poetry, then he stopped. His eyes strayed to the other pasttime he had. Like his poems, he'd not touched his guitar in a long time, since maybe Woodstock, he guessed. But today, he was full of the energy one finds with creating something.


Setting up his amplifier and turning the dial to the fullest setting his speakers could manage, Spike strummed through the piece of music that he’d been struggling to finish, ending the chords with perfect precision. He played his electric guitar that day like he had never played before in his entire unlife.


As he put the instrument down and shut everything off, he couldn’t wait to play the tune for the woman who had inspired him. He knew what he would call his new piece of music: it would be title "sunshine", for the one woman who took his dark, lonely days and nights away, bringing back the sunshine he desired.


His hearing picked up Buffy’s voice. Spike ignored his trepidation, striding confidently to the gym. He grabbed the young woman and was about to plant a sizzling kiss on her when he smelled the saltiness of her tears. Spike frowned, the moment of indecision evident in his hesitation to go to her.


Buffy sat there on the bench by the dumbbells, not dressed for sparring and looking so haunted, and when her eyes found his, they bore straight through him. Spike growled, the demon in him rising, its lust for vengeance building inside for whoever had hurt his girl. The vampire wasn’t surprised that he had started to think of Buffy as “his”. He just wondered if she considered him to be hers, too.


When Buffy heard Spike’s growling and saw the fierce look on his beastly face, she stopped crying. But the vampire would not be swayed. He knew Buffy was still greatly upset by whatever had happened.


"Buffy, pet, are you okay?" He ventured, even though he knew what her answer would be. "'S there anything I c'n--"


It was when she brushed the tears off of her runny nose that he saw the engagement ring on her finger. His eyes never left the huge stone or its glowing presence. Spike's jaw twitched; his orange-yellow eyes grew hard as the implication of the stone that twinkled there was all too clear.


Spike snarled, his demon revealing its displeasure. So, someone had staked a claim on his territory, had they? Well, he would deal with that someone soon enough.



He grabbed Buffy's hand, forcing her to the wall, his next word a declaration as he whispered, "Mine."


The young woman seemed to have lost her voice as she stared into his unyielding face. She wasn't angry; in fact, part of her wanted to be Spike's on some level. She just didn't know if she could give ALL of herself to any man, or anyone.


"MINE," he repeated, flinging her hand back to see what she'd do.


"Yours..." Buffy said softly, though Spike heard a slight hesitation in her voice. He forced the demon back as he wondered what Buffy's moment of indecision meant.


His mind was full of questions. She wasn't happily proclaiming her being with another man, that was certain. Maybe, Spike reasoned, or rather William did, this person had forced her to marry him. Was he holding some piece of blackmail material over his Buffy? Had he, in fact, raped her then insisted upon pain of death that she marry him?


Spike started reacting again, but he found to his relief that his nose told him no, his sweet Buffy had not been sexually violated. But even if she hadn’t been touched, Spike decided that he didn’t like the fact that she would soon be wed to another. He didn’t like it at all.


“You’re late, kitten,” he said quietly, his eyes still staring at her ring. Buffy lowered her hand from her tear stained face.


Buffy tried to sound normal, but Spike could hear the catch in her voice. “Sorry, she said, "but I had things to do at home today and…” , trailing off.


Spike’s angry orange yellow orbs “Obviously,” he spat, his eyes judging her and condemning her.


He thought about his past love, Cecily, just then. Spike also thought about Drusilla, the one who'd changed his life for all eternity. When push came to shove, they'd turned on him, too, like Buffy appeared to be doing.


The demon would NOT stand for being abandoned. When it found the man who'd proposed to his girl, it would show him once and for all who was Buffy's mate. Spike thought back to the conversation they'd had, and to the only man Buffy had spoken about: the one who called her "BethAnne".


Spike growled again. Buffy was getting annoyed at her vampire’s tone. True, she shouldn't have taken Riley's ring, but Spike didn't even give her a chance to explain things to him. This whole "me Tarzan, you Jane" thing had to end, she decided.


“What’s the hell is WRONG with you?” she responded hotly, forgetting about Riley’s ring on her finger.


“Nothin’, pet,” Spike replied caustically. “Absolutely nothin’ at all. You've made things all too clear! Are congrats in order, then? Did you jus' come by to receive your dosh and clear out with Captain Cardboard?"




The last words had been sneered at Buffy. She did what came naturally, letting a slap sting his cheek.


"How DARE you?!" She said. "It...this...was NEVER about doshing! I'm not with the doshing!"



"You don't even know what it means!" the vampire retorted.



"I don't HAVE to know," Buffy flung back, "when the guy who's saying that speaks to me the way he is!"


"Fine!" Spike shouted. "Then I'll just get my stash of cash and pay you so you c'n be on your way!"


Buffy's eyes widened as she realized what Spike was talking about. It sounded to her like he was breaking up with her. The young woman's lips curled with determination. She was through crying! If Spike was going to act like a child, then who was she to stop him by telling him the truth behind Riley's proposal? She ignored the other voice telling her that yes, she was three types of idiot for accepting his ring in the first place.


"So," she asked finally, "what are you saying, Spike?"


The vampire looked at the woman he'd wanted more than his own life. He considered begging her to stay, but he would not put his unbeating heart on the line again.


With a small voice, Spike said, "I think we should call it quits for awhile.”


Buffy felt her heart tearing in two just as easily as one of Spike’s ripped and discarded papers with smatterings of unwanted poetry.


“Why?” she whispered, her voice anguished.


“Why not?” Spike countered, trying to sound like her broken voice didn’t matter to him. He hoped he could get Buffy to leave him before he got down on his knees, begging her to forgive him.


When Buffy didn’t say anything, the revenant said in a cold voice, “'looks like your life is goin’ in a different direction from us being together. Tell me, did he kiss you an’ whisper sweet nothin’s in your ear? Did he promise a fairy tale? Cause I gotta tell you, pet, that bloke did me a tremendous favor!”


Buffy stared at Riley's accursed ring. How could she, a courageous Slayer of demons and vampires, be so cowardly at the same time when it came to telling her boyfriend “no” to his proposal?


“It’s not…” Buffy faltered. “I just…I accepted it, but I was gonna give it back to Riley and tell him that I didn’t want to marry him.”


Spike snarled at her and ground out bitterly, “An’ when were you going to reject him, Buffy? On your honeymoon?”


“No!” Buffy shouted. "It's complicated. With my mother there, and everyone else, what was I supposed to do?"


She tried to pull the vampire into her warm embrace, but he roared, pushing her away.


“Don't hold me!” Spike cried, “You DON'T get to touch me! 'Thought we were friends, but in the end, I’m jus’ a vampire to you, right?”


“And I’m just a Vampire Slayer,” Buffy said hotly.


Spike turned, his eyes blazing with anger and hurt. As soon as the words were out, the Premiere Slayer wished with all her heart that she could take them back.


“So tha’s it?!” he asked. “You agreed to marry him because he told you that you were a Slayer?”


“He didn’t tell me!” Buffy insisted. “Rupert Giles told me! He’s not only my mother’s doctor; he’s a White One, and he told me!”


“Oh, I see,” Spike yelled. “So, you got together all three o’ you, an’ you planned to hunt me down like the Vampire Beast that I am!” He made a pretense of thrusting his arm over his forehead and looking out into the gym.


“Where is everyone else?” Spike mocked. “’M surprised you didn’t invite a mob to my home to lynch me!”



“It’s not like that!!” Buffy screamed through gathering tears. “I don’t want to be with Riley! I want to be with you!”


“You sure have a funny way o’ showin’ it, LIZZIE!” Spike whispered in a furious voice.


He started to leave, but Buffy attacked him from behind, knocking him down to the floor. The vampire recovered, knocking her down. They hit each other with angry blows; Buffy punching him in the eye, Spike knocking the wind out of her.


Buffy got back up in record speed. She rammed into him, taking him down so that he was beneath her. Spike's eyes drilled into her, as she said, "Listen, you IDIOT, to what I have to say!"


Spike took an unneeded breath as he said, his voice oozing sarcasm, "This ought to be good."







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