It was the last thing that Buffy had been expecting him to say and she was in a trance of surprise, eyes wide and mouth hanging open. Ever since she met him, it had always been her pining after him, loving him from afar and wishing somehow that he could feel the same way about her, but never thinking it would actually happen. Even since they had started dating she imagined that her feelings were always going to be stronger than his, though maybe that was just her own insecurity. Now, faced with this confession, Buffy was rendered speechless.
“Buffy?” Will’s voice broke her stupor and she shook her head, bringing herself back to the present situation. She looked at him and saw his face shining with hope and insecurity, waiting for her to say something to reassure him. So Buffy did the only thing she could think of.
“I love you, too,” she said, smiling widely, eyes shining with tears. There was no use in holding back her emotions any longer, her face lit with an expression of unadulterated joy.
“Oh, thank God,” Will said, letting out a breath of relief. “Had me worried for a bit there.”
Buffy was unable to stop smiling and Will’s smile grew to mirror hers. They looked like exactly what they were: two lovesick teenagers, completely crazy about each other. She had thought she was blissfully happy a week ago, but nothing compared to the way she felt right now. Nothing could possibly be better than this. It almost seemed too simple.
“I love you,” she said again, unable the words from spilling out.
“I love you, too.”
She would never get tired of hearing those words, and she would never get tired of saying them either. Being in love and loved in return was the purest, most sublime feeling the world.
They moved toward each other with the same goal in mind, meeting each other halfway, lips touching gently at first. Their kisses took a new form, becoming more tender and frantic at the same time. It was like their confessions of love had amplified their libidos and they couldn’t get close enough to each other. Will’s hands ran up and down Buffy’s back and her hands went to the back of his neck. She started to lean back, pulling him down on top of her. His arms came rest on either side of her and she opened her legs to let him settle between them, keeping their lips locked all the while. His kisses were sweet, perfect and wholly overwhelming.
She loved the feeling of him above her, their chests pressed together, her hands running up and down his back. Will’s hands slowly moved up her sides as their tongues continuously danced, slipping under her top to caress her skin. She could feel his hardness pressed into her center and she pushed up against him, arousing both of them even further. Will let out a groan when she wrapped a leg around his waist and ground against him again. The sound brought her back to reality for a minute, causing her to remember that they were in her backyard with her mother just inside the house.
“Will?” she breathed out, pulling her mouth away from his for a moment.
“Buffy,” he said, claiming her lips again. She was swept up in his kiss again and forgot for a moment why she had stopped in the first place.
“Will,” she repeated, a bit more loudly as he moved his lips to her neck. “As much as I’m loving this...oh,” she gasped as he sucked on her pulse point. “My mom is right inside,” she finally managed to get out. Will stilled his lips on her neck, pulling his head up to look at her.
“But I’m having so much fun,” he pouted, pushing his bottom lip out in way that made Buffy really want to bite it. He made it so difficult for her to not jump him whenever he was around.
“I know, so am I,” she said as he rolled off of her. She looked to him, mirroring his expression of frustration.
“I guess that means we’ll have to continue this another night.” Will gave her an impish grin leaning over to kiss her shoulder. She shivered despite the balmy night air, feeling his warm breath on her skin as his mouth hovered over her.
“I guess so. We’ll have to find someplace more…private.”
“Well, my car has a very large back seat, as you know.”
“Mmm…”
“And I will ravish you properly.”
“Sounds like a plan.”
They both lay back down, facing each other, losing themselves in each other’s smiling eyes. They started to inch toward each other when Joyce’s voice rang out from the back door.
“Buffy! It’s late, time for you to come inside!”
Buffy and Will both shot up, not wanting Joyce to catch them in any kind of compromising position, though they hadn’t actually been doing anything.
“Okay, Mom!” Buffy called out. “I’ll be inside in a few.”
“Guess that’s my cue to leave,” Will said, standing up. He held his hand out to Buffy, which she gratefully took, pulling herself up off the ground.
“I don’t want you to go,” she said, pouting and wrapping her arms around his torso. She hugged him tightly, burying her face in his chest and inhaling his masculine scent.
“I don’t want to go.” He kissed the top of her head and squeezed her to him. “I love you,” he whispered against her hair after a few moments.
“I love you,” she repeated, tilting her head up to capture his lips with hers, giving him one last kiss before they had to say goodnight. She reluctantly pulled back from his embrace. “Goodnight, Will.”
“Goodnight, Buffy.”
***
“Sweetie, are you sure you want to do this?”
“Yes, Mom.”
“But, you could just as easily stay here and get a job...start making some money.”
“Mom, I told you,” Xander said, loading a sleeping bag and a suitcase into his new Honda Civic. “I need to do this.”
“Okay,” Joyce said with a sigh. “I just worry about you.”
“I know. But, I’ll be fine. I’ve got everything I need, my car, a credit card, snacks…”
“Clean underwear?” Buffy asked with a smirk on her face.
“Crap!” Xander exclaimed, running back into the house.
“He’d lose his head if it wasn’t attached to his body,” Joyce said, shaking her head.
“I think he’ll be fine, Mom,” Buffy said, trying to reassure her mother.
It was a few weeks after graduation and Xander was finally leaving for his trip. He had deposited all his graduation money into his bank account, gotten everything squared away with his new car and had even mapped out the route that he planned to take. He had shown more initiative in planning this trip that he ever had doing anything else, which shocked Buffy immensely.
In many ways, she believed that the trip would be a good learning experience for Xander. Maybe, without all the external pressure he would be able to do some real soul searching and come to terms with himself and his sexuality. He needed some time to come into his own, without all the crutches he leaned on at home. Even before he and Will’s fall out, Will had been his only friend, and then Anya after that. Hopefully the trip would give him a chance to open himself up to other people as well. She just hoped he would be careful.
“Got…underwear,” Xander huffed as he came running back outside, clutching a fistful of colorful boxer shorts. He was breathing heavily, apparently having run the whole way to his bedroom and back.
“Are you sure you want to go?” Joyce asked one last time.
“Yes.”
“Do you have absolutely everything you need?”
“Now I do.”
“Okay, then,” Joyce said, her eyes starting to tear up. “I can’t believe my baby is leaving me for a month,” she cried, pulling Xander into her arms.
“Mom, it’ll be okay,” he said, hugging her back.
“You had better call me at least twice a day, no matter what. Tell me where you are and what you are doing. Do you understand me?” Joyce pulled back, taking on a more stern demeanor as she lectured him.
“Yes, Mom.”
“Tell me again where you are heading first.”
“Up the coast toward San Francisco, then eventually up to Portland and Seattle.”
“Call me when you stop tonight and let me know where you’re staying.”
“Okay, Mom.”
“And drive carefully.”
“Yes, Mom.”
“And don’t talk to strangers.”
“Mom,” Xander said, placing his hands on her shoulders. “I’ll be fine.”
“Oh, honey.” Joyce pulled Xander into another embrace, hugging him as if she may never see him again, which may in fact have been a very real fear of hers.
“Mom, I have to leave now if I’m going to get to San Francisco tonight.” Joyce let him go after another quick squeeze. Xander looked to Buffy, who had been watching the scene with amusement.
“Behave yourself, young lady,” Xander said, mock scolding her, then pulling her into a hug.
“You got it, bro.”
“I know I haven’t been the best brother these past few months, but I’m really gonna miss you, Buf,” he said, pulling back to look her in the eyes.
“I’m gonna miss you too, Xan,” she replied, offering a genuine smile. As much as Xander had been a jerk lately, Buffy was really going to miss him. It would be weird without him around the house, making stupid jokes and leaving his stuff everywhere. “I hope you find what you’re looking for.” Xander just nodded, then got into his car.
“Be careful,” Joyce said, after he rolled the window down.
“Gotcha, Mom,” he said with a laugh, starting the engine of the car and backing out of the driveway. Buffy and Joyce looked on as he pulled away, waving as he drove off down Revello Drive.
**
One night a few weeks later, Buffy arrived home after having been out with Will. She came into the kitchen where Joyce was poised against the counter with her arms crossed. Her face wore a look of perception and concern that Buffy barely registered, still reeling from her recent encounter with Will.
“Good night?” Joyce asked.
“The best,” Buffy sighed with contentment.
“So, things are going okay with Will?”
“They’re going wonderful,” Buffy said wistfully. “I’m so…happy.”
“I’m glad you’re happy, honey. But, have you thought about what’s going to happen at the end of the summer?”
“What do you mean?”
“Sweetie, I don’t want to burst your bubble, but you need to think about what you’re getting yourself into.” Buffy was pulled down from her happy cloud very quickly. “You need to remember that William is leaving at the end of the summer. And he’s not just going a few hours away, he will be across the country.”
“Don’t you think I know that?”
“I know that you know it, honey. But, have you thought about the reality of it?”
“Yeah…I guess.”
“I don’t think you have,” Joyce said with disbelief.
“Are you telling me to break up with him?” Buffy asked, choking back tears.
“No, I’m not. I just want you to realize that everything will be different when he goes away. He’ll have new friends and school to worry about…he’s not going to have as much time for you as he does now.”
“Mom, he’s not just going to forget about me. We love each other.”
Joyce sighed, seeming to realize that she wouldn’t be able to change Buffy’s mind about Will. “Please tell me you two are being safe,” she said after a few moments, rubbing her temples.
“Mom! We haven’t…done that.”
“Oh,” Joyce said, sounding surprised. “Well, if or when you do, I want you to feel comfortable enough to talk to me about it. I know I can’t stop you, so I hope that you two are smart enough to use protection.”
“Okay, Mom,” Buffy said, unable to look her mother in the face, having flushed red with embarrassment. However, she was surprised at what her mother has actually said to her. She was okay with them having sex?
“But, you are only sixteen, and Will is a few years older than you. So, you might think he expects you to do that. But, there’s no shame in not being ready, honey. I didn’t even lose my-“
“Mom!” Buffy exclaimed suddenly, realizing the even more embarrassing turn this conversation was about to take. She certainly didn’t need to know about her mother’s sex life. Talk about too much information.
“What I mean, honey, is that you should wait until you’re ready. Okay?”
“Okay.”
**
“My mom tried to have a sex talk with me last night,” Buffy told Will the next day in the car on the way to the beach. It was a hot, sunny day and there was a limited amount of things for them to do in Sunnydale; the beach had seemed like their best bet.
“How’d that go?” he asked, suddenly seeming interested.
“Okay, at first. She said she knows she can’t…stop us and that we should be safe. Then it got weird when she started to talk about when she lost her virginity, something I so don’t need to hear.”
“So, your mum’s okay with us having sex?” Will asked with a look of surprise on his face, and if Buffy wasn’t mistaken, a bit of eagerness.
“Of course that’s the only thing you got out of that,” she said, rolling her eyes. “Mostly, she said that I should wait until I’m ready.”
“Oh.”
“That’s all you have to say?” she asked, narrowing her eyes.
“What do want me to say?” Will kept his eyes on the road, not turning to look at her.
Obviously her subtle hints weren’t working on him, so she decided to ask him outright. “Well, are you ready?”
“Of course I’m bloody ready, Buffy,” Will said, voice taking on a sound of desperation. “But, I’ll wait as long as you want,” he said, softening his tone.
“Okay.”
“You don’t feel like I’ve…pushed you into anything, do you?”
“No, of course not!” she exclaimed. That hadn’t been what she meant at all.
“Then what are you trying to get at here?” he asked, confused.
“I don’t know,” she admitted. She truly didn’t know what she had meant to do by bringing up the sex thing. Frankly, it confused her as well.
“Are you ready?” he asked, apprehension evident in his voice.
“I’m not sure.”
“Well, then we’ll wait,” he said with resolve, as he pulled the car into the parking lot of the public beach. Luckily, it was a weekday and wasn’t too crowded. They got out of the car, grabbed their bags, and headed down to the shore, walking hand in hand.
“Will,” Buffy started as they found a spot to put their stuff down. “It’s not that I don’t want to-“
“Buffy,” he said, placing a long finger over her lips to silence her. “You don’t have to explain anything to me.”
“Okay,” she said, smiling shyly.
“Besides, I can’t complain, can I? Seeing as I’ll get to look at you in what I’m hoping is a very skimpy bikini,” he said with a teasing smile, playing with the hem of her cover up.
“I don’t know if you deserve it,” she teased back, stepping out of his reach and slowly lifting up the pink terry cloth to expose the tops of her thighs.
Before he could respond, she surprised him by ripping off the dress and throwing it at his head. She heard him shout something as she took off toward the water, her bare feet sinking into the sand as she ran. She didn’t look back as she reached the wet sand, but she knew that he was following right behind her.
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Author's Chapter Notes:
Thanks to everyone who reviewed the last chapter! You guys are awesome!
Enjoy!
Enjoy!
Chapter End Notes:
I'm trying to wrap up this part of the story so I can start the sequel soon. I don't want to leave anything hanging, even though I feel like the story is kind of dragging at this point. I just worry it's becoming a bit boring...but this stuff needs to happen. But, maybe that's just my issue. Anyway, I hope you guys are still into it!
The sequel will be much more angsty, therefore I am looking forward to it much more.
Thoughts?
The sequel will be much more angsty, therefore I am looking forward to it much more.
Thoughts?