The Magic Box was deserted of customers and Giles and Anya nowhere to be seen; the only person in the shop was Tara. She was sitting at the table, a book with illustrations of plants opened in front of her. She didn’t appear to be reading it, however, just staring into space, her eyes glinting with unshed tears.
“Tara, what happened?” Buffy immediately pushed her own worries to the back of her mind and sat down beside the witch. What had changed the normally so happy and content Tara into this bundle of misery?
Tara sniffed and pulled out an already wet handkerchief. She blew her nose and wordless held out a dried flower to Buffy. It was the flower she’d so happily twirled in her fingers the other day during the witches’ duet.
With a choked voice Tara was only able to utter, "Willow," before she broke down in sobs. Buffy placed her arm around the girl and pulled her into a hug. She caressed her long hair while Tara’s tears wet her shirt.
Buffy looked at the flower, then at the book. There was a depiction of the flower on the opened page, titled “Lethe’s Bramble.” Underneath was a description of its properties. She couldn’t make any sense of it, but it seemed the flower was an ingredient of some sort of charm or concoction. Surely Tara had understood its meaning.
“Tara, sweetie, what happened?” Buffy repeated.
“Willow… the flower… yesterday. I thought it was… a present. But… the song…” Between sobs Tara spluttered words, slowly forming the whole story.
She’d found the flower yesterday under her pillow and had thought it was a love token from Willow, who’d been especially sweet and caring to her that morning. But their song had triggered some doubt in her, so she came here today to check the flower out. Lethe’s Bramble was used in as spell called “Tabula Rasa” which altered your memories and erased certain events.
Buffy suddenly remembered her own vague feeling yesterday, of some memory slipping away from her mind.
Tara extricated herself from Buffy’s hug and wiped her eyes. “Sorry, I made your shirt all soggy. Buffy, I think Willow erased some of my memories. I can’t remember parts of the last couple of days. How could she do that? How could she violate my brain after what Glory did to me?” New tears spilled down her cheeks.
“Tara, whatever Willow erased, she might’ve also done it to me. Maybe she didn’t actually intend it for me, because I can at least feel that there is something missing. Like, you catch a glimpse of something out of the corner of your eye but when you look directly, it’s gone? If we only knew what it was she didn’t want us to remember or who else was affected.”
“Willow isn’t even here right now. She went to LA to meet up with a friend and she won’t be back before tomorrow. Oh, I hate that I have to ask her about the spell, but to have to wait so long is even worse.” Tara looked at Buffy and visibly straightened in her resolve.
“I love Willow so much, but if she really put a spell on me, tampered with my memories… I don’t know how I can live with that, how I can trust her anymore.” Worn out by the emotional onslaught, she rested her elbows on the table and hid her face in her hands.
Gently Buffy pulled Tara up. “Let’s get you home, Tara. Try to get some sleep. Maybe it isn’t something bad at all; maybe there is a reasonable explanation. Come on, I’ll take you home.”
"Buffy, we need to talk." Spike crept out from behind a tombstone. He’d been waiting since sundown, impatiently walking a groove into the ground, lighting his next fag with the burned down stump of the last.
God was he nervous! Since Buffy had sent him away after her amazing kiss the other night he’d been hanging on by a thread. Scenarios were running through his head, in most of them Buffy had sent him away, disgusted about what she’d done, not wanting to keep up any contact with him. God, he was still an insecure wimp!
"Can we not talk? I'm so not up to this conversation yet," Buffy avoided his gaze, looking back and forth across the cemetery.
He knew she’d pull back, hide behind the barriers she’d erected around herself. How did he stand a chance after the mess her boyfriends had left her in? Sod his bastard of a grand-sire, he was the first. How could he have hurt her so much? He hadn’t even tried to find a solution to work around his curse. He’d just left the girl. The pillock had even felt all superior and noble about it, Spike was willing to bet. He had watched them interact while he was looking for the love-spell. The wounded puppy-dog routine, the ‘we’re just friends’ declaration. He’d seen the train wreck advancing; he’d just been too drunk to care – if he’d have cared at all.
"Buffy, you kissed me! You can't just push it away and pretend it never happened!" Spike pleaded. “That’s like trying to un-ring a bloody bell!”
"Oh my God, Spike, I know that. You think I don’t know that?!” Buffy finally met his gaze, green eyes pleading with him. “But I can’t handle it right now. I… I don’t understand it myself, how can I explain it to you? Can we just not do this? Not now? Why do you need to analyze it? It wasn’t even a real kiss."
At least she didn’t deny it on the spot. But where did that leave him?
"You can’t just ignore everything that doesn't fit into your black and white world, Slayer. It doesn't work like that. It never does! I don't want to put any more pressure on you pet, but please, don't shut me out." He wouldn't back off. Not this time. This was too important for him to let her shrug aside the kiss.
"I deserve to know," he boldly added.
Buffy looked at him like a deer caught in the headlights. He could see the uncertainty, all the questions running amok behind her brow.
“I… I don’t know why I kissed you. I tried to understand it but… Hell, isn’t my life complicated enough? Giles wants to ask the Council to pay me compensation; I still don’t know what to think about that. And Willow’s done something – not sure what, we’re trying to figure it out. What if the kiss is another spell - like the marriage thing? I’m confused and…”
A shout sounded in the distance and she grasped the straw. With a hurried, “Demon! Need to go!” she turned and sprinted away.
Spike stared after her retreating form, his shoulder muscles tense with frustration. He would let it slide for now; what other options did he have? If he followed her and insisted on an answer, she might just pull back more. He knew that even going with her on a normal patrol would be too much. Resignedly, he turned and went back to his crypt. He would wait, but just another day he promised himself. One more day was the limit of what he could endure.
I woke up confused. My head was positioned on something firm and solid. A chest. A nice muscled, leather-clad chest. And it smelled enticing, musky, honey sweet like good whiskey mixed with tobacco. It smelled familiar. But this was the only sensation that made sense to me.
I wrinkled my nose and lifted my head to take a look. Oh, ummh, wow! I lay in the embrace of a solidly muscled arm, firmly pressed against the most attractive man I’d ever seen. Or had I seen him? I couldn't remember anything here. There was just some fuzzy fog in my brain, like I was on medication. But no man could look as yummy as my pillow. No man, not possible. His mussed white hair seemed to gleam and his cheekbones were so striking that
they should require a permit. And his mouth called for me, pulled me in. I just had to brush my lips against his, feel their softness, feel them moving under mine.
Hypnotized, I drew nearer when I was stopped by a whimper from his other side. A slender, teenaged girl with brown hair was beginning to stir in the protection of his other arm. Large blue eyes opened and stared at me in confusion. A wave of protectiveness swept through me as I extended my hand towards her and gently swept a lock of hair behind her ear. “Hey there! Are you ok?”
Her mouth opened, then closed again as a tear rolled down her cheek. “I… I don’t know… what happened?” She finally stammered in a small, frightened voice.
What could I say to this? “I don’t know either. Something is weird. I can’t remember anything. Well, anything useful at least. I can’t even remember my name. Can you?”
More tears spilled down the girl’s cheeks. “No… nothing… why can’t I remember who I am?”
“Shhh,” I tried to soothe her.
Suddenly I became aware that somebody was watching us. The stunning stranger – huh, how cheesy is that – was staring at us and he had the most remarkable eyes I’d ever seen. To call them blue would’ve been like saying that Niagara Falls is nice. They were cerulean, like the sky on a fresh spring morning, luminescent, burning with an inner light which seemed to spill out of them directly into my heart. And framed by long dark lashes I would die for. Crap, I was staring like a star-struck teenager.
“’ello ladies. What an extraordinary way to wake up.” He drawled in a low husky baritone. With an accent, a sexy British accent! I was a goner. Whoever this was, he was to be mine! Or maybe he already was … I can’t remember! How could I not remember that?
I gave him a beaming smile. “Hi, I’m… oh… somebody? We can’t remember anything, not even our names. Can you? Do you know where we are and what happened?” Whoever I was, I seemed to have the tendency to babble when nervous. So not a cool habit.
He chuckled and carefully extracted himself from us. He offered us his hands and pulled us up. The other girl was younger than me, but also taller. And the stranger, well he was the right size for a girl to snuggle on, lean but not over towering me. Nice, but irrelevant at the moment.
I checked my dress and looked around. We were in a shop which sold really weird stuff like statues with too many arms, candles by the cases, and it smelled of patchouli. There were several other people lying lifeless on the floor. Whatever had happened to us had obviously happened to them as well.
A thought popped into my head. “I hope this isn’t some alien invasion!” I blurted out “You know, like in the movie with Superman where they all went unconscious and then got these alien babies…”
“Whatever the bloody bastards did to us, they’ll get a special vicious kick from yours truly, for unsettling you with that awful image.” Blond and gorgeous gave me a fierce smirk.
Oh my God, I was way too young to have babies, aliens or not. At least I thought of me as young, wasn’t I? Judging by the attention I got from my pillow, I probably was young and not too bad looking. And why do I remember such irrelevant stuff like movies and not my own name for heavens sake?
Ok, focus on facts. The others were finally waking up too. Besides us, there was a group of young people; a slender red-head, a sweet looking blonde girl and a boy with dark hair who was built on the heavy side. Well, not my type, I like my men more compact. Behind the counter was an older man with grey in his hair who was helping a young, slim woman up to her feet. Was he the shopkeeper? Maybe he knew what was going on and who we are.
He cleared his throat and took charge of the situation. “Well, hmm, I would like to introduce myself, but there seems to be some problem with, ummm, my capacity for remembering.” Oh dear, another Brit, but a stuffy one. I compared my companion with the – shopkeeper? This was awkward, having no names. How should we address each other?
“Does anybody remember their names? Any clue who we are?” I piped up.
They all looked at me, shaking their heads. “What about – IDs, or driving licenses, we seem old enough for those.” Hey, it felt good to take the lead. At least we were doing something to clarify the situation. Maybe I was some sort of executive… yeah! A CEO of a multinational corporation! That would be cool. But my pockets were empty and there was no handbag near where I was lying.
I looked at the dark haired girl that I’d spoken to earlier. She had a necklace with a name on it. “Look here, it says ‘Dawn’,” I pointed out to her. “This must be your name. Pretty.”
She let out a squeal and hugged me. “I’m Dawn, I’m Dawn!” she announced to the amused onlookers. “But who are you? Did you figure out what your name is?”
“Nope. Not one single clue. And I refuse to look for a name in my underwear.” I’m definitely against being called Chantelle or Victoria or some such name they use for lingerie.
“Oh, you should just choose a name for you. How about Jenny?” Dawn squeaked. I shuddered at the thought.
“How about Elizabeth?” suggested my sexy Brit in his velvet voice. “That sounds fittin’? A beautiful name for a golden girl like you, pet.”
“Cool! We could call you Beth,” came the enthusiastic reply from Dawn.
Elizabeth, Beth, I could do worse. And it sounded right, well not on point, but close enough. “Elizabeth it is, for the moment, just until I remember my name again.”
I smiled back at him. “How about you? Found anything on you or should we christen you too?”
He tilted his head and gave me a heated gaze. “Anything you like, luv.”
Giving me pet names in this smooth caressing voice did things to me I would like to explore more. Preferably alone with him and for a long time. God, how I hoped he was my boyfriend. That would make things a lot less embarrassing. I tried to ignore the tingling running all over me and studied him. Contrary to his outward punk appearance, he behaved like he was a person who cared about people. So I racked my brain for a British, kindly sounding name for him.
“How about Edward, or… no – wait! William! Isn’t that a very popular name in England? I like it.”
He smiled back warmly. “Anything you like is ok with me, sweetheart. So, William it will be.” Did his accent turn more sophisticated with this or was it just my imagination? “Oh, sorry about that, I didn’t mean to be disrespectful,” he added.
Yup, definitely more refined. I smiled back reassuringly. “You can call me pet names whenever you feel like it.”
“Seem to feel like it all the time, pet.”
Dawn was frowning, watching us intently. “You know, I think he’s your boyfriend,” she blurted out. “You’re so perfect together, like you’ve known each other a long time. I just wish there would be somebody for me too, you know, not a boyfriend, but somebody who cares…” Her voice trailed off.
I couldn’t help but to wrap my arm around her. “You know, I feel like you belong to me. Maybe we’re sisters? At least we can be sisters now. Would you like that?”
She sighed and snuggled deeper into my embrace.
Suddenly two arms curled around us from behind and a quiet voice spoke. “I’ll take care of you too, Niblet. If you would like that and if your sister allows it,” he added with a shy smile.
It was weird but I felt good. Like I‘d gotten my family back. Somehow I had the impression that I’d not been too happy a person before this. Maybe our current situation wasn’t so bad at all. And if this bundle of yummy goodness was my boyfriend, who would reject such a present from the heavens?
Half an hour later most of us were assembled round the table in the center of the shop, still trying to figure out what had happened. Were we the only ones affected? I hoped that somebody out there might recognize us and help us regain our memories, but nobody had entered the shop nor even passed by, and darkness was falling.
At least we’d pinned down some more names. The older man seemed to be the shopkeeper after all; the business cards on the counter referred to him as one Rupert Giles. My bleached-blond pillow might be related to him or not, they couldn’t decide. The bottle blonde girl behind the counter voted on being called Sunny. Since she awoke wearing an engagement ring and lying directly on top of Mr. Giles, she was sure that she was his fiancée and no one could dissuade her. After the way she eyed the cash register with more tenderness than the shopkeeper, her preference was clear to me.
The dark haired boy found a driver’s license tucked in his jeans pocket which revealed him to be Alexander LaVelle Harris. Clearly he’d hoped for a more exciting persona.
“It could’ve been worse. Your parents could’ve named you Snoopy,” I joked, after which he surprised everybody by doing a Snoopy-dog dance. Arrgh, wish I could wipe out that image from my brain; this was prime material for a nightmare.
The remaining two members of the party were clinging together. The blonde girl was shy and, after stuttering a few words, kept mute with downcast eyes. Poor girl, she looked nice and sweet to me. Maybe we could cheer her up a bit.
The delicate redhead immediately latched onto the opened books strewn across the centre table. She seemed to have a sharp mind, turning the pages with enthusiasm and quickly giving the rest of us reading assignments. When I wasn’t immediately thrilled with her idea to research, she launched into a tiring speech about the merits of knowledge and yadda, yadda, yadda. Bossy! Hey, why did she think she could command us around? I’m the CEO of a billion dollar corporation. Sigh… whatever!
While turning the musty pages of my assigned book, my main attention was on my hottie. He strode through the room like a tiger that had been caged for far too long in a small prison; his heavy black boots clonking on the wooden floorboards. His leather duster hung deserted over the back of his chair so I now had an unobstructed view of his glorious body.
“You’re checking out his ass,” Dawn whispered, making me jump in my seat. Mischief glittered in her blue eyes.
“Hey, I so don’t…”
My lame excuse was cut short by her sniff. “Of course you are. Every woman who isn’t dead or blind would do it. I think I’m developing a crush on him too. What a shame that he’s way too old for me. But you should check him out. Have you noticed how he watches you?”
Okay, I had. Even if I tried not to make it obvious.
Bored by all the not-reading I was doing, I closed the tome with resolution and went over to him. “Hi, ummh, how are you?” Yup, queen of the eloquent repartee. Trust me to act brain dead when I want to impress a boy.
He cocked his scarred eyebrow and gave me a knowing smirk. “Books ’re not your thing, pet? You’re not alone there. If I have to stay cooped up in here any longer I might go bloody bonkers.”
I just had to agree, even if I didn’t understand half of what he was saying. In his velvet baritone he could have recited the telephone book and I would’ve listened in rapt attention.
“Do you think we know each other? You know, like friends, or more, as…” my voice trailed off, embarrassed. Well, subtle much? I could feel my cheeks rapidly heating up. Even better, blushing like a virgin, which I so was not. Or was I? Well, definitely not the time to ponder that disturbing thought.
“Luv, you look beautiful when you get all flustered.” He bent over and whispered into my ear. “Love to think I’m the reason for that radiant glow.”
Cocky bastard. Cocky, handsome, hard-bodied, blue-eyed bastard.
I was aware of Dawn’s stare spearing my back. Oh my God, where is a trapdoor when I need one? Exit, pronto!
His heated gaze pinned me to the ground and my heart was fluttering like a butterfly. He slowly walked me backward into the corner under the balcony, where we were a bit more hidden from the others.
“Why don’t we find out?” his husky voice sent shivers down my back, exquisite tinglings burning into my skin. If he kept this up, I would make even more of a fool out of myself by cumming on the spot without him even touching me.
And oh, how my body ached to be touched by him. When I lifted my head and looked into his eyes I was doomed. They were a burning blue, like a searing flame at its hottest, stripping my mind until nothing was left but the magnetic pull behind my belly button. From this center my stomach was filled with hot lava burning down to my core, consuming all other sensation.
Then his mouth lowered onto mine. Not forcefully as I’d expected, but softly, tenderly his lips were moving against mine, probing and begging for entrance. My arms sneaked around his neck of their own volition, my fingers gently sliding along the rim of this t-shirt which raised a low sensual growl from deep within him. His plastered-back hair was surprisingly soft and curled around my fingers as I loosened some locks from their gel prison.
With a soft moan I opened my mouth to welcome his tongue. It slid cool and moist against the inside of my lip and entwined around my tongue, gliding along it in the slow rhythm of a soundless tune. My ears were thundering, like waves crashing violently on a rocky shore. If his arms hadn’t pressed me flush against him I might have sunk legless to the floor.
I have never, ever been kissed like this – of this, I was certain.
My senses were all on overload. The musky smell of him, the silken touch of his lips, the soothing, and at the same time arousing, glide of his tongue. His firm body, flush against mine, his hard erection pressing into my stomach all combined to make me feel desirable, more womanly than I’d ever felt before. How would it have been possible for me to have forgotten these sensations? Eternal damnation to whoever had done this to us.
While I took a desperate breath, he whispered against my lips, “I don’t care what was before. We’re clearly meant for each other. Sweetheart, just this one kiss has me addicted to you. I’m drowning in you, pet.”
With another rumbling growl, he latched onto me again and I was lost in this whirlwind of emotion he could stir in me. Wherever his hands touched me, they left hot, tingling patterns on my body, and oh, his hands were everywhere. They possessively cupped my ass, kneading it with strong fingers. His right hand glided up my side slowly, oh so slowly, until it caressed the swell of my breast through the thin fabric of my shirt. I had left off my bra today so my nipple pressed hard and demanding against his thumb. Each stroke had me quivering as electric shocks threatened to fry my brain.
I gave back as good as I could in my overwhelmed state. My left leg wrapped around his hip to increase the delicate pressure as I rubbed my wet core against the rough fabric of his jeans, my heel massaging his calf.
When he moaned, “God, pet, you’ll make me cum in my pants!” I deepened the kiss ferociously, all inhibitions I might’ve had left going up in smoke from the roaring blaze he’d ignited inside me. Yes, I felt powerful; exhilarated that I could drive him as crazy as he’d made me feel. My hand tugged at his shirt and slipped beneath it, feeling the taut muscles of his stomach jump just under his cool, silken skin.
Then the bubble around us exploded when the door burst open with a loud crash.