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Author's Chapter Notes:
Thanks to the lovely Puddinhead for her work editing this piece.

There's a warning--go to the end notes if you want to be despoiled.
Previously:

Four pairs of eyes swiveled to her. Giles took his glasses off.

"Spike seems to be...urm...alive."

Any response she might have been contemplating dried up in her throat.

~*~

Buffy stared at the four of them for a moment and then dashed into Dav's bedroom. Spike was where she'd left him. His profile stood out on the purple pillow like a tooth against dark lips. His short hair had grown a little and was just starting to curl. Buffy had never noticed how gentle the slope of his nose was amid the severe angles of his cheekbones or the small scar on his chin. She touched his face, which was warm and slightly tacky from sweat.

Spike didn't sweat.

Normally his skin felt like sturdy silk, but now the texture of his flesh was softer and more vulnerable. He felt alive.

She sensed someone standing behind her and Buffy nearly whirled around to throw a punch out of sheer frustration.

"Buffy, do you have any idea how this could have happened?" Giles voice asked from over her shoulder. Buffy didn't look away from Spike's face.

"Can I get a hand mirror?" Buffy asked, ignoring his question.

"Sure, hold on," Dav said. The other girl shuffled around and a few moments later, handed Buffy a small, black compact. Buffy opened it with a click and put the glass near Spike's mouth. She almost dropped it when she noticed his reflection.

"Oh my God," Dav said next to Buffy's left shoulder. They watched as Spike's breath made a streak of fog.

"Good Lord," Giles said.

"He's not a vampire, which means no one is going to hurt him."

"Buffy, that was never our intention. I simply wanted to determine if Spike has a soul—"

"No more tests. No one touches him anymore."

Dav and Giles began to speak when Xander's voice cut them off.

"Do you want us to leave you guys alone for a while? You know, get some sleep? It's been a long night for everybody. Maybe things will make more sense in the morning."

Buffy swallowed hard and nodded. Giles patted her back.

"We'll figure things out tomorrow," Giles said, as he and Dav left the room.

"No matter what happens, you're among friends, Buff. You both are, even though I know I haven't always been a booster of you coupling up with the undead. The situation is different now, obviously. It's not just the pulse, either. You two have been through something none of us can imagine," Xander said.

Buffy turned around and saw him standing in the doorway with a half smile hanging from his cheek. Xander looked exhausted. His longish, brown hair was hanging limply around his face and there were dark crescents under his eyes. His back was bowed, as though his head had grown very heavy.

"Thank you," she said, tears suspended over her eyes like a watch crystal on a timepiece.

Xander nodded and then left, closing the door behind him. Buffy crawled into bed next to Spike, still wearing all her clothes, and put her head on his chest. His heart was beating an even rhythm. Her arms wound around his waist and she squeezed him, but he didn't respond. It seemed like a good idea to sing to him—his voice had grounded her when she'd been hurt and scared.

"The other night dear, when I was sleeping, I dreamed I held you in my arms. When I awoke then I was mistaken, so I hung my head down and cried. You are my sunshine, my only sunshine, you make me happy when skies are gray. You'll never know dear, how much I love you. Please don't take my sunshine away—"

Her voice creaked along the words again and again until she finally joined him in sleep.

~*~
After Xander closed the door he fixed Davinia with a hangdog look that made her terribly uncomfortable. Eddie was sitting on the couch, his dark brows clutching together as though he wasn't sure what to say.

"It would be wise for all of us to get some rest," Rupert said, moving closer to her.

"I have a spare room with twin beds and the sectional sleeps two. I'm taking the couch, since you are my guests, but if none of you want to lay down near my feet there are two cots in my attic room. You'll have to go through my bedroom to get up there, though," Dav said.

"I'll sleep out here with you, then," Eddie said. Dav was grateful he spoke up before the problem of where she fit among the sleeping arrangements descended into an argument. Xander was acting like she was the one who'd broken up with him and Rupert had become super-protective of her lately. That combination had sparked more than one fight over the last few weeks.

"Where are the others, by the way?" Dav asked Eddie. Willow and Andrew were supposed to be collecting Joyce.

"They should be here in the morning," Eddie said, his eyes going distant. Dav was certain he was worried, but trying not to let it show. She waited for him to elaborate on his conversation with Andrew, but he didn't. Rupert and Xander were oddly silent. It made her wonder what had gone wrong and why they'd decided to conceal it from her. Dav was used to the half-fledged Scoobie treatment, though, so she didn't say anything.

She'd already made up the couch with blankets and sheets, so there seemed nothing left to do but shoo everyone off to their respective places. After Xander and Rupert had said their goodbyes and shuffled away to the guest room, Eddie wearily unlaced his boots.

"So when it gets to the point where I'm taking off my jeans, please contain the awe-struck panting. It's flattering and all, but I'm spoken for," Eddie said with a smirk.

She was grateful somebody was in a joking mood.

"I'll do my best, as long as YOU can restrain yourself," she said, grandly letting her robe drop to reveal a pair of sky blue pajamas dotted with stars. They were about as sexy as the average great-grandma's underpants.

"Damn baby, I can almost see your clavicle," he said, as he pried off his left boot.

"I know. There's also some hot ankle action down below," Dav said. She made a point of getting beneath the covers and closing her eyes before he could take off his jeans.

"Good night, Dav. Hopefully I can sleep after your little strip tease."

"Same here," she said, smiling into her pillow.

They settled in their spots. Even though it was late, she could not fall asleep.

Perhaps ten minutes passed before she heard bare feet padding on the floor. She sat up and saw Xander lurking near the kitchen. He was wearing nothing but the boxer briefs she'd given him to replace his "wacky" novelty underwear. It wasn't fair, the way he looked. His torso was rippled in a perfect way and his arms were all muscley from carpentry work. That contrite look burning in his brown eyes was the kicker. She knew he'd never have had the courage to confront her in his nearly naked state before they started dating, but she'd made him feel confident in his body. It was a brutal irony.

"Are you watching me not sleep?"

"Sorta. Yeah. Could we talk?"

"Fine, let's go to the bathroom so we don't bug Eddie," Dav said as she struggled out of the blankets. Eddie's eyelid twitched, indicating he was obviously not asleep, but he said nothing. Dav stood without taking the hand Xander offered to her. They walked silently down the hall, then hung a right into her smallish bathroom. Dav sat on the edge of the pink tub and Xander took the distractingly fuscia toilet.

"So," she said.

"So." Xander rose, putting her in the odd position of being exactly crotch level with her ex while he was wearing his super-snug, black underwear. Dav also got to her feet.

"Sorry, just didn't want to say this while I was sitting on the can."

"Gotcha."

"I think we should get back together. I made a mistake."

"What about Willow?"

He glanced down, abashed, like a little boy caught stuffing mud into his mother's lingerie drawer.

"She's my friend."

"Okay, let me be me specific, what about how you've been boning Willow?" Dav asked in a harsh whisper.

"Who told you?"

"I'm not an idiot. Do you realize you're screwing the one person who makes it impossible for us to ever date again? There's no way I'm going to make you cut your best friend out of your life and there's no way I can trust you around her."

"You can trust me—"

"Tell that to Cordi—"

"That was high school. Things are different now. You're different," Xander said, his voice hovering just below normal speaking tone. He reached out to touch her. Dav backed away until the cold, porcelain tub bumped against her calves and brought her to a wobbly stop. Xander's hand fell back to his side.

"Rebounding with the girl who's adored you since kindergarten is unconscionable, especially since she ditched her two year relationship for you."

"She didn't—she and Oz were having problems—"

"Come on—she ended things with him the day after you dumped me. Has she told you she loves you?"

"Yeah, but it doesn't mean she's in love with me."

"Were you naked when she said it?"

Xander's lower lip twitched and he put his hands on his hips.

"I'll take that as a yes. I bet you said it back to her, didn't you?"

"That has nothing to do with me and you."

"It's everything, Xan. You love her, she loves you. Go and be with her before you screw that up, too."

"The way I love her is totally different than the way I love you. She's more like—"

Dav's voice came out like a hiss.

"Shut up! I'm the last person who wants to hear this. You picked the absolute worst time to
have a heart-to-heart and now you want to tell me about how you love Willow? What next? You're gonna tell me what she was like in bed compared to me?"

"No! I mean, you were pretty much the same, so this isn't a sex thing—"

"You are such a-a-a freaking—boy! Leave me alone. Please."

"I'm sorry," he said. He slunk out of the room.

The wooden door was swollen from years of dampness, so Xander had to wedge it shut, making his exit more pathetic somehow. Dav sat on the lid of the toilet and took the box of tissues from the back of the tank. She set it between her legs and worked herself into a good cry. Her tears had dwindled to a case of sniffles when she heard a discreet knock.

"I'm sorry, I'll just be another second," she said, hopping to her feet. She plucked up the soiled Kleenex scattered around the floor.

"Urm, Davinia, it's Rupert. I just wanted to see if you were alright."

"I'm fine."

She stuffed the garbage in the waste basket, set the tissue box on the floor and then ran some cold water. She washed her hands and splashed cold water on her face. Dav snatched a towel and was scrubbing her cheek with it as she yanked open the door. Rupert stood on the other side with his hands in his brown, corduroy trouser pockets. He'd ditched the gold, silk button-down which had been the whole of his Ethan Rayne disguise and had on a white undershirt. Even though he was completely dressed, it felt strangely intimate to see his bare feet.

"Hi," she said, throwing the towel in her hand over the rack.

"Hello. May I come in? I'd like to talk and I wouldn't want to disturb Eddie."

"I guess...sure," she said, moving out of his way. Rupert stepped into the bathroom, making the walls even closer by his presence.

"Xander was upset when he got back into the room."

"Is he okay?"

"He's fine. How are you?"

Dav crossed her arms over her chest.

"Sad, but I'll be okay. You really didn't have to check up on me, Rupert."

"I know, dear, but I thought you might want to talk."

"What's there to say? He's with Willow now. He just doesn't realize it yet."

"He is very young," Rupert said, running his hand through his sandy, brown hair.

"I get that this whole mess wasn't malicious. He just doesn't know what he's doing or what he wants. I should be grateful we only wasted months instead of years."

"I think losing you will be one of the great regrets of his life."

"Did he tell you to say that—"

"No, he didn't have to. I was a young man once. I know the sorts of mistakes they make."

"Stop talking about yourself like you're Methuseleh. You're not an old man. You're in better shape than me—"

"It wasn't my intent to fish for compliments."

"Then what is your intent?"

Giles sighed and took off his glasses. Instead of cleaning them, he set the frames on the edge of the sink.

"When I told you about Jenny, there were some things I never said; things I've never told to anybody, really. She and I had both lived a great deal before we met. When I was younger, before I really understood myself, I would rush into things with women—try to pretend my heart wasn't a consideration. It always was, though. I'm not quite as pragmatic as I like to believe. With Jenny, we took things slowly at the beginning in order to spare us wasted time in the end. We never did anything rash."

"I understand. I should have waited with Xander."

Rupert cocked his head at her and his eyes narrowed. His smile had the fine point of a hook.

"No, Davinia, I don't think you do understand," Giles said.

He put his hand on the indent of her waist and pulled her body into his. His other hand twined through her hair and tilted her head up before she could patch together a sentence. Then he kissed her. His mouth tasted like liquor and she decided he had to carry a flask because the only booze in her house was cinnamon schnapps.

Dav's arms relaxed and she was kissing him back even though everything in her brain was screaming: 'Halt! This is really complicated, your house is full of people including your ex-boyfriend whom you still love and this guy is twenty years older than you. You're tripping into incorrigible slut/epic daddy issues territory! Why aren't you listening to me?!?'

Her internal monologue continued to screech as Rupert's hand slid under her pajama top. He cupped her breast and his fingernails bit into her nipple. She let out a sharp "yee," and then broke away from the kiss.

"Why are you doing this?" she asked, clasping her hands to her chest.

His continued to hold her waist beneath the hem of her shirt. As he spoke, his thumbs traced distracting circles on the bare flesh.

"Because I've wanted to for a long while," he said, his lips coiled into a grin. "I love you. It's sudden, I know, but it's real nonetheless. I didn't want to get in the way of you and Xander, but I believe that's over now. Am I wrong?"

"No, but your timing is still horrible."

"Yes it is. This is a terrible position to put you in and I'm sorry, but I'd regret keeping silent much more. I couldn't bear it if you left without knowing the depth of my feeling for you."

"Leave?"

"Why would you stay here when there's nothing but danger and pain? You could make a life anywhere."

"I haven't thought about it."

"I have, a great deal. Davinia, this is selfish of me, but if given the chance I could give you a reason to build a home here. I could make you happy."

"I can't be your girlfriend. I just got out of this thing with Xander and he's like—I'm not sure what you guys are. Your crime fighting subordinate? I don't want to mess that up."

"Xander is like family."

"See. This is crazy. I can't do this to him," she said, shaking her head. She stepped closer to the door, but he blocked the way. He moved in on her until their bodies were flush.

"Even though he didn't show you the same consideration?"

"Using you to get back at him isn't something I want to do, alright? I care about you too much."

"So I've utterly misread you? You feel nothing for me outside of friendship?"

Her eyes skittered over his expression, taking in his tight mouth and the sadness in his eyes. Dav was at a loss. She did feel something more than friendly towards him. On more than one occasion she'd stopped herself from stroking his hair when he looked exhausted or offering to rub his shoulders. She believed wholeheartedly that he loved her and she'd dreamed of him touching her the way he was at that moment.

"You didn't misread," Dav said, surprising herself with her own honesty.

He kissed her and slid his hands up to caress the heft of her breasts. Her shirt was gone, suddenly, and the rush of cold air made goosebumps pucker her skin. He bowed to taste her nipples and tease them with his teeth. She held his head to her chest and thrilled at how his mouth looked; his quick tongue darted out, leaving a sheen against her skin. This was definitely wicked, in an eat an entire box of chocolates during the course of an afternoon kind of way. He moved lower down her body, kissing along her sternum, all the way to the felted waistband of her aged pajamas. He whisked them down her legs. She widened her stance to give him better access to her pussy while her internal chastising monologue slowly went hoarse. He pressed his mouth to the soft, red hair at the top of her thighs and then brought his hands into play. Rupert dragged his fingers over her clitoris until she whimpered and then slipped them inside her body. His tongue found her clit and in a few moments her conscience committed seppuku rather than continue to exist in dishonor. The way he moved had her close to orgasm fast. She didn't want to come yet, though. She tugged on his hair until he stopped sucking and looked up at her with dazed eyes. She noticed that his right eye had a wedge of brown in the green iris, a flaw that made the whole even more beautiful.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"Nothing, but, did you want to make love?"

"I don't have any protection."

"There's some in the medicine cabinet," she said, feeling another flash of shame. Xander had bought the rubbers and put them in her bedside table. She'd moved them to the bathroom because they'd made her too depressed. Rupert smiled at her and then kissed the soft round of her stomach. He sprung to his feet and rifled through the mirrored cupboard until he found the prophylactics. He was slackless and condom-wrapped before she could blink. His body was startingly lean and long-limbed, like a teenager.

She was trying to figure out the logistics of sex without a bed when he picked her up and rested her ass on a wooden shelf beside the sink. She tried not to remember that Xander had built that shelf for her. She ran her hands along the elegant taper of Rupert's waist. He pinned her against the cool, tiled wall and speared her in between the trembling wings of her legs.
This was happening and it couldn't go back. Rupert was pumping inside of her and she was officially a very, very bad person. His thumb ground against her clit while he lapped at her breasts. She was getting closer and closer with each thrust.

"You taste like carameled apples, just like I knew you would," he muttered against her neck.

"You're such a liar, but I like it," she chuckled.

"See for yourself," he said, dragging her into another kiss.

~*~

Xander looked up when the bedroom door creaked and a rectangle of light spilled across the floor. He expected to see Giles but instead Eddie was stealing quietly into the room.

"Hey, what's up?" Xander asked, not even pretending he had been asleep.

"It's kind of...um...noisy out there. I'd be more comfortable in here," Eddie said, drawing back the rumpled sheets and sinking into Giles' abandoned bed.

"Is Dav okay? Do you think I should go out and talk to her?"

"No, definitely not. Giles is taking care of her. I think you're probably the last person she wants to see right now," Eddie said, his gestures so twitchy they reminded Xander of a guinea pig cleaning itself.


Chapter End Notes:
Yes, so, Giles and Dav have sex. Graphically. I did not intend to write the hell out of this scene when it was first conceived. However, it just kept getting more and more elaborate until you have what you see here. My apologies to Anthony Stewart Head. My one consolation is he will never read this story. Please leave a comment--grossed out, turned on, ashamed for me? Let me know.



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