Willow braved looking up at the Master to find he was still watching her. Never in her life had she seen such intense eyes, it was as though he saw straight through her, to her very core.
For a moment she'd been on the verge of blurting out a confession just to get him to stop, certain that he already knew. To her immense relief, Dalton entered the room, and their nearly spoken words remained unsaid.
She was utterly bewildered when Dalton walked up and handed her a small card, then stepped back, seemingly waiting for something.
"Your choice of dinner," the Master clarified.
"Oh, right." She scanned the list of meals and, flustered, picked one at random. You couldn't go wrong with chicken.
"We'll eat in here," he instructed Dalton, who gave a small bow before leaving.
"Do you not normally have dinner in this room?" she asked, curious.
"No, but you'll be more relaxed here."
This puzzled her. Why did he care? Was he trying to put her at ease in order to seduce her or something? And where did he usually eat that would make her uneasy? Never mind. In his room, obviously. She suddenly appreciated his courtesy very much.
"I want to get to know you," he said. "First though, is there anything you'd like to know about me?"
"You want..." She couldn't quite believe what he'd said. "You want t-to get to know me?"
"Of course. If I don't know you, I won't be able to properly take care of you."
Still a little stunned, she plucked at the embroidered hem of her sweater. She wasn't entirely sure what he meant by 'taking care of her'. Maybe she could get some answers about what exactly was going on and what he wanted with her.
"Oh. Um. What's your name?" she asked, despite already knowing. A nice and polite opening always worked best.
"William, but please call me Spike. Everyone does."
Fred had made it clear that Spike was just a moniker, but even so she was amazed. One name was the picture of conventionality, the other anything but.
"Do I wanna know how you got that nickname?"
"No," he said and laughed. "It's not a nice story, but it happened a very long time ago."
"What's very long to a vampire?"
"A century or so."
She couldn't help but wonder what it would be like to be immortal and think of time in decades and centuries rather than months and years. When she asked how old he was, he actually had to close his eyes and think. As he mentally added up the years, his lips moved silently. He finally came up with a hundred and forty-three.
"Wow," she said, fascinated despite herself. Buffy had told her that Angel was more than two hundred, but she was impressed regardless. "I bet you've seen so much of the world."
"Been to all five continents, at least."
"How did you end up here, wherever here is?" she fished, seeing a chance and hoping she was being inconspicuous enough.
He leaned further back in his chair and brought his hands up to fold them in his lap. "That's not very subtle, you know."
"I-I didn't mean to-"
"Yeah, you did. It's alright, I was expecting it."
She turned red and ducked her head. So much for trying to be shrewd.
"The tale of how I ended up here is long and boring. We don't have time for it tonight I'm afraid, but I'll tell you another day if you want. As for where we are," he smiled, "you don't need to know. You're safe here and everything you need will be provided, that's what matters."
Still ashamed and feeling quite miserable she decided to switch tactics to blunt honesty. "You're not going to let me go, a-are you?"
"No," he replied without hesitation.
Her shoulders slumped. Although the confirmation didn't exactly come as a shock, a small sob escaped at the thought of never seeing Sunnydale again. Spike stood up, walked around the table and hunkered down on the floor beside her.
"Listen, Red, you belong to me now," he said. "I get that it's most likely not what you expected from life, but here you are. It is what it is. Make the best of it."
That was the final straw. She stood up so abruptly and with enough force that it knocked him off balance and he fell back on his ass.
"Belong to you? No I-I don't! I don't belong to anybody! I mean, I get that you're this, you know, really old vampire and everything, but what century do you think this is?"
"I-"
"You can't own people anymore! I wasn't anyone's to give away! And, and m-make the best of it? What's that supposed to mean? You sound like those guys who say that if a girl is attacked she should just lay back and enjoy it!"
"Red-"
"No," she said, unable to hold back her tears. "My name is Willow, not Red, and I don't belong to you, and I just want to go home!"
As she loudly sobbed out her misery, he fell quiet. To her surprise, he didn't seem upset at all that she'd knocked him over. He simply got back on his feet, shrugged out of the duster and draped it gently around her shoulders – making sure to remain at arm's length. Then he fetched the box of tissues on his desk, offering it silently.
The added layer of black leather oddly enough made her feel more safe. Protected, somehow. She took a few deep breaths, pulled the duster tightly around her and sat back down, cradling the cardboard box in her lap.
"Do you expect me to..." She faltered and searched for words she felt comfortable using. "Uh, yield to you?"
She didn't want to look at him but he'd hunkered down beside her again so she couldn't simply duck her head and escape. Instead, she made a fuss out of blowing her nose and drying her eyes, using the tissues as a barrier.
He raised a questioning eyebrow at her. "Yield? That's very old-fashioned of you."
"You know what I mean."
"No need to be scared, Willow. I have no plans to bed you."
Hearing him confirm it was a tremendous relief, yet at the same time a completely new feeling of dissatisfaction rose in her.
"Um," she hesitated, "why not?"
The corners of his mouth twitched in amusement. "Do you want me to?"
"N-no, just... wondering."
"Spoken like a true teenager. How old are you, pet?"
"Sixteen. I'll be seventeen in August."
"I find you very attractive, love, but you're a bit young," he said, and she felt her face go hot again. "And I'm not in the habit of forcing women."
In an effort to avoid him and hide her embarrassment she turned her head to the side. How she'd even dared to asked she would never know. She supposed she'd wanted validation of some kind. She wasn't even sure what she meant anymore, simply being around him made it impossible to think clearly. Not to mention, the crying fit had given her a headache.
He reached up and touched her chin - the first time he'd touched her intentionally - and gently nudged her head around until she faced him again.
"I'm not going to lie and pretend that I don't want you; I do. You're a beautiful girl. What fascinates me the most about you though, is your childlike innocence. I wouldn't want to take that from you."
"You mean my virginity?"
He smiled and shook his head. "Not quite, love. Some people keep their innocence for a while after they become sexually active, others lose it long before they start. It's not about the physical at all. Innocence is a state of mind. The way you still look at the world in wonder."
He'd released her chin, but she was too confused by his words to look away.
"If I were to bed you now you'd become jaded. You'd lose that sparkle in your eyes."
"So you're just going to keep me around and, what, wait for me to get older?"
"Close. I'll wait for you to want it. If you never do, that's fine. If you do," as he spoke, his eyes darkened and seemed to burn with something unsaid. It made her turn aside again. "Well, that's fine too."
Okay, so basically what he was saying was that she was in the driver's seat. She could deal with that. In fact, this was more than she could have hoped for. Hadn't Anya said that Tara had been here for two years and had never slept with the Master? He was probably waiting for her as well.
As far as she was concerned, he could wait forever.
"For now, I only wish for you to be as happy as you can be in my care. If there is anything you need or want - other than going home obviously - let me know."
She let herself relax fully. It still made no sense to her to have women in your harem that you weren't sleeping with but there was no way she was going to point that out to him.
Their dinner arrived and he returned to his seat. For a while they sat in silence as two minions set the table for them. A plate of chicken in a creamy sauce with a side of green beans and french fries for her, a tall glass of blood for him.
As soon as they were alone again, she pointed at his glass with her fork.
"Do you drink it warm, too?"
"Yeah, it tastes awful when it's cold. Bit like coffee, in a way."
She made a face at the thought of sipping cold coffee.
They'd given him cutlery as well and she wondered why until he used the fork to steal one of her french fries.
"I didn't think vampires ate food," she said, and wrinkled her nose as she watched him dip it into the blood and eat it.
"Most don't, but I like the texture and the flavors. Besides, drinking your entire diet gets boring after a while."
"I bet. Like those diets where you're not supposed to eat anything, just drink these special shakes at every meal."
"Yeah, kinda like that."
She asked him a few more questions about vampire eating habits, including whether they had to watch their weight. He told her that he worked out regularly to stay in shape and had an exercise room somewhere that she was free to use as long as she asked first. When her questions tapered off, he took over.
"Do you miss your parents?"
"Maybe this makes me sound weird, but no, not really. They aren't around much."
He didn't question it. "What do you miss, then?"
"My friends. School."
"Tell me about your friends."
She told him about growing up with Xander, meeting Jesse later on and how Buffy had swept into their lives a year before. When she explained the events leading up to Jesse's turning and subsequent death, he apologized. She was a bit bewildered at that and said so, but he merely shrugged and maintained that while he didn't know the boy, he was nevertheless sorry it had happened to someone she cared about.
She went on to talk about how being friends with Buffy had opened her eyes to the darker side of Sunnydale and described some of the adventures they'd had together. The story of Amy's mother swapping bodies with her daughter in order to be a cheerleader again had him alternately chuckling and shaking his head. She had to admit that in hindsight, it was pretty funny that a grown woman was so desperate to relive her glory days.
After they finished their meals, they both remained at the table. The food along with his earlier reassurance made her feel at ease and she was comfortable telling him about her life.
When he asked about Xander, it took her by surprise. She'd expected him to want to know about Buffy, but he hadn't brought her up at all. After listening to her talk about Xander for a while, he interjected with a small smile. "Do you love him?"
"Yes, I do," she confirmed, seeing no reason to deny it. "But he doesn't love me."
"Unrequited love is rough," he said and made a sympathetic noise.
"It is." She paused for a moment. "How do you know?"
"I fall in love easily. It hasn't always been returned."
He looked wistful for a moment and she wondered what he was thinking about. Before she could mount the courage to ask, however, he changed the topic to school. She was grateful. Thinking about Xander hurt; if he had experienced the same then it probably hurt for him too, and he likely wouldn't want to talk about it.
"Which subjects are your favorite?"
"Math, English and Advanced Computers."
"Advanced, huh?"
Feeling shy, but all too used to people pointing out her intellect, she nodded. "Teacher's pet and nerd extraordinaire, that's me!"
She'd learned that making fun of herself was a good way to deflect attention from her cleverness. He did laugh, but not in the way she'd expected.
"Just means you're smart, which is nothing to be ashamed of."
"Says you," she said and rolled her eyes in an overly dramatic fashion so he'd know she didn't intend to insult him. "In school, being smart is not a good thing."
"No?"
"Nope." It occurred to her that he likely did not know the politics of teenagers, as he hadn't been one for a very long time. She spelled it out for him. "It means you get bullied."
"Is that so," he mused and reached up to stroke his chin with his long, tapered fingers. "Were you?"
She shrugged, pretending to be unaffected. "Since first grade, pretty much. Everyone wants my help, but no one wants to be associated with me, except for Buffy and Xander. I'm always picked last in gym class, too. When we're playing ball games and stuff."
"How come?"
"I have terrible hand-eye coordination."
Seemingly sensing her growing unhappiness at the memories, he steered her back to more pleasant topics. "What do you like to do in your spare time? Do you have any hobbies?"
Before she knew it, she was gushing about surfing the internet, coding programs and her hacking skills. Despite the danger of the topic she couldn't help herself, it had been a long time since someone was genuinely interested in her.
As she feared, the connection did not escape him.
"I don't know much about computers but I understand that they are the future and see their use. It seems there's hardly anything they can't do these days.” There was a small pause. “I'm also aware that the damage caused by a hacker can be extensive."
She nodded mutely and chewed on her lip.
"You've had access to the computer in the library for a couple of days now."
More nodding.
"Is there something you need to tell me?"
Here was her chance to come clean and perhaps avoid repercussion. It wasn't like it was a big loss if he cut her off from the network anyway; she could do little more than wreak havoc to the mundane running of the Mansion. It seemed that he didn't yet rely on modern technology for anything too important. None of the computers ran security systems or anything else that could benefit her and Buffy.
"Yes," she said.
He regarded her with an unreadable expression.
"I haven't done anything," she continued quickly. "I just poked around to see if I could."
"And could you?"
"Your network isn't secure at all," she admonished. This was a personal pet peeve of hers. Not only was it risky of the owner, it also didn't give her any challenge at all and she enjoyed being challenged. "There's nothing stopping me from tampering with the email system you use, or to access any of the remote computers."
"It never occurred to me that anyone here might try to mess with it."
"You're the one that said you didn't trust your own minions," she replied, maybe a little tartly.
It worked. He dropped the stoneface and broke into a small, crooked smile. "Touché."
The breather was temporary however, as he quickly fell serious again.
"Did you?"
"Did I what?"
"Tamper with anything."
"I didn't touch anything, but I looked around. Checked out what programs you use on the different computers, the files, that kinda stuff."
He smirked. "Did you find my porn?"
She dropped her eyes to the tabletop while her cheeks burned.
"See anything you liked?"
She flushed harder. "I had no idea that's what was in the folder! It was just called 'pictures'! I only opened one, realized what it was and left it alone."
He didn't seem to care that she'd invaded his privacy and merely chuckled.
"Thank you for being honest with me, Red. As a vampire I don't get that a lot. We're not big on telling each other the truth, thus I have come to value honesty."
She looked up at him, biting her lip. "Are you going to punish me?"
"No. You didn't know about the rules when you did it and I'd like to think that if you'd known, you wouldn't have." His eyes bore into hers and she tried to appear trustworthy even though she wasn't sure herself what she would have done.
"I know I keep harping on about this, but if I had known that you were coming things would have been different. There would have been a room ready for you, clothes for you to wear, and I'd have sat down with you on the first day and explained everything, including the rules. Things have been kinda slapdash and for that I truly am sorry."
I confess to breaking the rules and he ends up apologizing to me, she thought. What a strange vampire.
"It's okay," she said, and meant it.
"So the security is shoddy, huh?"
"Very."
"I'll move anything sensitive to a separate computer that isn't connected, should've done that from the start, but..." he trailed off and appeared to be thinking about something.
She took the opportunity while he was distracted to study his face. Most of the time she looked his way she would only steal quick glances or focus somewhere to the side instead of directly at him. She knew she was shy to the point of being ridiculous, especially around boys, but being around Spike was a hundred times worse. He wasn't just not a boy, he was technically not even a man. The knowledge at the back of her mind that he could sink his fangs into her neck and drain her at any time didn't help whatsoever.
Another fact entirely that also contributed to her lack of self-confidence was that he wasn't exactly bad looking. The unusual cheekbones combined with his so-very-blue eyes gave his face a deceivingly angelic appearance. His mouth was full and soft, too. She could definitely understand his appeal to the other women.
"Red," he said and she hurriedly shifted her gaze to the wall behind his head. "Do you also know how to safeguard computers? Not just break in?"
"Yeah, I'm pretty good at both."
"Is that something you'd like to do?"
"What do you mean?" she asked.
"Change it for me. Make it impossible to hack into."
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Author's Chapter Notes:
This is the last chapter I had already completed before I began posting, so from here on out updates will be slower. Sorry! I do plan on spending most, if not all, of NaNo on this story though, and I'm hoping to have it finished before Christmas. Of course, your reviews = encouragement to write more!