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Author's Chapter Notes:
I OWN NOTHING!
FUN AS ALWAYS! (:
Spike had been pacing back in forth in the hallway, outside of Buffy’s room for what felt like hours. He desperately wanted, needed to talk to her. He was still stunned by her performance tonight, and couldn’t believe she was actually going to leave the band.

Mustering all the courage he could he reached his hand up and placed a small knock on the door.

Buffy was lying in her bed. All of her things were packed, she just had to wait until 6AM to leave for the airport to catch her flight to California, and she couldn’t be more ready.

She nuzzled under the blankets deciding it was time to get some sleep, when a sharp knock on her door startled her.

Hopping out of bed, Buffy glanced down at her short silk PJ shorts and matching pink tank. ‘Should I grab a jacket to throw on or something?’ She thought and the knocking continued. Deciding it was probably just Willow or Xander, she made her way over to the door and pulled it open, only to be met with intense blue eyes.

“Spike?” She asked dazed, almost as if this wasn’t real.

“Buffy can I talk to you for a minute please?” He gave her a pleading look.

Everything in her body told her just to shut the door in his face, but her heart wouldn’t allow it. She nodded and stepped aside letting him walk inside her room.

She shut the door and turned to him. “What do you want Spike?” Buffy asked, having no more fight left in her.

“I just wanted to tell you how sorry I am. I know that it isn’t enough, and you probably will never forgive me. But I can’t just let you leave without telling you…”

“Don’t do this Spike. I’m glad you want to apologize and I appreciate it, it’s just too much. Right now I just need… some space, some time. I need to heal and that means leaving you behind.” She turned to the door to let him out, but stopped when she felt him pushed against her back.

“No Buffy, you can’t leave me behind. You say you love me. You don’t just give up on love.” Turning around as quickly as possible she shoved him back.

“Don’t give up on love? Why would I stay here and continue to watch the man I love… you know what it doesn’t even matter, I mean nothing to you. You made that pretty fucking clear.” She looked down at the ground fuming. ‘How fucking dare he tell me not to give up on him, when he never even tried to care about me.’ She told herself.

“Buffy of course you mean something. You’re my best friend, I love you.” Spike cupped her face and set his forehead against her.

Buffy was lost in oceans of blue, looking deep into the eyes of her love, made her forget everything, for a moment.

“Were not friends, not anymore.” She managed as she tried to pull away from him. Spike wasn’t having that and kept a hold on her.

“No your right, were not friends.” Buffy’s eyes teared up as her lip quivered crazily. “We’re so much more than that sweets. “ Spike placed a light kiss on Buffy’s forehead.

“Love isn’t brains Buffy, its blood… blood screaming inside you to works its will.” He sighed deeply. “Great love is wild and passionate and dangerous. It burns and consumes.” Tears were streaming down Buffy’s face, and she tried to compose herself.

“Until there’s nothing left. Love like that doesn’t last Spike.” He wasn’t hearing her. He leaned down at laid a feather light kiss on her lips.

“Why are you doing this?” Buffy pleaded with him, begging him with her eyes to stop. Her heart couldn’t take this. She loved him way too much for all these games.

“Because I can’t let you leave like this, you have to know how I feel.” He said running his finger across her arms, making goose bumps rise to the surface.

“And how do you feel?” She questioned.

“I love you Buffy. I’ve always loved you. It just took me a little while to figure it out. I’m so sorry I put you through all this.” They were looking in each other’s eyes, and Buffy saw so much sincerity in his.

Without thinking anymore, and just letting herself feel. She reached up grabbed Spike by the nape of his neck and brought his lips down to hers.

Heat spread throughout her entire body. They kissed with so much passion and fire. Neither knew where they began and the other ended. Buffy lost herself in the feel of him and let him heal all the hurt she’d been feeling for months.

Spike was holding Buffy by her waist and drawing circles on her exposed flesh. He fingered the hem of her tank, and gave her the opportunity to stop him. When she didn’t he slowly slid the shirt up and pulled it over head. Spike kissed down her neck and on her collar bone.

“God Buffy, I love you so much.” He moaned and she started rubbing her hands of the small of his back.

She needed this, needed him to take the pain away, even if it was just for right now.

Buffy pulled his shirt over his head and moaned at the intimate contact of their bodies mushed together. They kissed everywhere their lips landed and soon enough were naked and on the bed.

Spike was kissing all over Buffy’s body, slowly making his way down to her sensitive spot.

“Oh Spike.” She moaned as he kissed over her thighs and rubbed his finger over her bare, glistening flesh.

“Baby, I’m going to make this so good for you.” Spike promised before diving in, and lapping on her clit.

Spike was in heaven. He’d never been with anyone so sweet, so responsive, and he loved it.

“Oh god, so good.” She moaned, grinding against his needy mouth.

Spike wrapped his arms around her hips, and continued to take her body to heights. “God baby you taste so good.” His eyes practically rolled back in his head.

The sight before him about made him blow his load on the bed. Buffy was naked, her head thrown back, eyes closed, and body quivering. He had to grind against the mattress to relieve some tension.

“I think I- Oh fuck, I’m about to-“ Buffy screamed as a powerful orgasm washed over her body, squeezing her legs against Spikes head.

Spike lapped at her greedily, until her body stopped quivering. He crawled up her and smashed his mouth to hers.

“Oh baby, I need you so much.” He groaned into her mouth.

“Yes, Spike please.” He positioned himself at her entrance and slowly eased into her scorching heat. Both groaning at the feel of each other.

Spike felt her barrier and wrapped his body tightly around hers before ripping through her virginity.

A painful cry stopped Spike and he was met with tearful eyes. “I’m sorry sweets, only hurts for a minute.”

“Oh-okay.” She nodded and Spike kissed away the fallen tears before slowly moving in and out of her welcoming body.

“You okay baby?” Spike asked as more tears started falling. He was concerned and prayed her wasn’t hurting her too much.

Buffy felt full, for the first time in months. She never thought she would ever be this close to Spike and it was an incredible experience.

“Yes, I just love you.” She muttered, face heating up with embarrassment.

“I love you too baby.” He leaned in and fused his lips to hers.

The kissing heated quickly and soon they were matching trust for thrust, grinding into each other for release.

“Right there. It’s so good.” Buffy chanted as her body hit heights she never knew existed.

She shattered around him, barley realizing he flipped them over, putting her on top… in control.

“That was incredible.” Spike told her, looking up in dazing, nervous, green eyes. “I want you to experience it all with me Buffy. Just hold on to me baby, move up and down, I’ll help you.”

“O-Okay.” Placing her hand on his chest, Buffy experimentally moved up and down, groaning at the new sensation racking through her body.

Spike grabbed onto her hips, to help her move on top of him. She was heaven, straddled above him, slowly riding him, moaning for him. He couldn’t believe he’d been so stupid. This girl was everything to him… always had been. He was never going to let her go now.

Her mouth formed a little o and he knew she was close again. He held onto her hips tightly, steering her, grinding Buffy’s precious button on his pelvis.

Buffy through her head back in ecstasy, she’d never experienced anything like this. Her orgasms had been good, well as good as your hand can make them. But that never prepared her for the earth shattering feelings Spike was producing through her hungry body.

She relaxed and looked down at the beautiful man beneath her with wonder, and amazement.

Spike sat up, now face to face with his lover, wrapped his arms around her middle and started placing open mouthed kisses all over her.

He worshiped her body, while they slowly moved together. Making love, in every way possible. They stared into each other’s eyes and Buffy felt at home.

The current was coming, and fast. They were both about to drown. Spike reached in between them, found Buffy’s sensitive spot and squeezed, sending her flying through the sky and away from the atmosphere.

He couldn’t take it anymore. Spike ground into her one last time, before emptying his seed in her needy body.

****5AM*****

The alarm went off and Buffy dismissed it quickly, not wanting to wake Spike. She staggered out of bed, made her way into the bathroom to change, so she could get to her flight.

Last night had changed a lot of things, but she couldn’t stay. Even for him. She had to do this, had to leave him. She loved him yes, but it was time to move on.

She gathered all her things together, glancing one last time at Spike, who was still asleep, before making her way out of the door, and out of his life.


Chapter End Notes:
(looks through fingers and holds breath)
I was really nervous about this chapter.
I hope everyone enjoys it!

REVIEW PLEASE AND LET ME KNOW
XO



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