Chapter Thirteen – Prague
Raj had apparently been researching Prague since the train. Buffy had no idea how he was able to link up to the internet but he had some sort of implement. He had explained it and Alex seemed to get it and accept it and that was really good enough for her. He could have been speaking fyarl for all she knew. Apparently they were not in a touristy part of Prague, but they were only a few blocks away from a huge black wedge that got Buffy’s Cali-girl radar atwitter.
She had been right, Raj pointed it out saying it was basically a Czech shopping mall.
Buffy’s idea of shopping had changed in the last few weeks, it had basically been whittled down to: only buy what she needed to keep going and get everything from little shops and thrift stores that accept cash, preferably in small amounts. Once or twice she and Spike had basically traded out from a good will bin, but Spike lived in drug-store brand black t-shirts and the grubby black jeans—Buffy was itching for something not so much with the gloomy and denim. The clothes they had been keeping to had been functional and marginally comfortable but outdated and generally boring. Buffy was ready for some retail therapy and the second she walked through the doors and removed her coat, she felt some sort of influx of energy.
Everything about Novy Smichov was foreign, Buffy recognized none of the shops and food stalls, but other than that, the glossy tiles on the floor and the florescent lights had her almost hypnotized from the moment she stepped through the whoosh of air that kept the cold out. There was some sort of mall smell that all these places seem to have piped into them. Buffy wondered idly if it was all some sort of conspiracy. That vein of thought quickly took her into badness so she decided to ignore it. She needed to starting thinking about not evil demon-y things right the hell now. And thankfully there were brand new European trends that could distract her.
“You said you had something spendy in the mix?” she said her eyes still wide with all the stores and crazy lights.
Raj jerked his head towards the signs for the ATMs.
Alex and Buffy followed him to the machine and he fed the first machine a blank card and input a few numbers. And withdrew a bunch of Czech crowns . Then he proceeded to the next bank machine and did the same thing.
“This only works once per cashpoint and I would avoid using it at the same bank.” He glanced back and tried to look as stern as he could. “Keep it at the limit of the machine. I don’t want to override what I don’t have to override.” He handed Buffy and Alex a ridiculous stack of what looked like monopoly money. “Where should we go first?”
Buffy smiled, and lead them over to the United Colours of Benetton. “How about this? I’m so sick of black.”
Raj grinned and followed her. He was dressed identically in the blacks and dull greens they had used to break into the facility. Alex was still dressed he clothes she had arrived in. Buffy looked at her as if for the first time.
“Jeez, Lex,” she said. “are those jeans tight enough?”
Alex looked down at herself, everything she was wearing was a little grimy—but she was quite attached to it all. She was glad this is what they had caught her in and not one of her more trendy outfits, crocheted dresses didn't mix well with evil exploratory experiments--she had gotten lucky. She was wearing her favorite grey cashmere sweater that had held up well, considering; a pair of skinny jeans that Grandpa Giles had balked at buying for her and her battered old combat boots. She had also taken Spike’s leather duster with her being the only on without a winter coat. Despite the wool and the duster she was still cold anytime she was outside. The thick denim held up well but the sweater was thin and she had been indoors when they had inter dimensionally sucked her out of her time. So at the very least she would need a coat, and it would be nice to be out of the old clothing even if it was traded in for chunky cable knits and clogs. The teenager surveyed the shop and tried to find things that appealed to her aesthetic. She supposed she could do flares. And some of the stripe-y sweaters Buffy was flinging into her arms. The frilly drape-y shirts however she could do without as well as the cargo maxi-skirts.
Shopping seemed to re-energize the slayer. She was a whirlwind. The blew through Benetton paying for several items, pom pom hats and belts and the flared jeans and at least two of the striped sweaters and then they were in Bally getting fancy boots and a couple of stores Alex didn’t recognize, she hoped to god there would be an H&M because that would at least be familiar. The foreign stores didn’t seem to hinder Buffy; being unfamiliar with just how much she was spending was probably no help either. She bought enough to keep them for the winter and a suitcase to keep them in.
There were more patterns and “basics” and knitted winter fashion. There was a burberry coat and chunky scarves, long leather maxi skirts and mock turtle necks and Alex tried not to cringe at the cuffed pants and the “camo”.
Just as Alex and Raj were about to collapse, Buffy spotted a salon. She and Alex were weighed down with bags when she gestured to Hair Cut and Color.
“Roots?”
Alex hesitated.
“Don’t tell me you’re freaked out about having your hair cut? I’ve seen you face down commandos!”
“I’m really just more worried about getting the Rachel.” She said.
“The Rachel is in right now, Mcfly.” Raj suggested.
“That’s heavy, Doc, say how about we calculate the jiggawatts my fist can produce while its hitting your face.” Alex replied without missing a beat.
“Wow, that was definitely a proportional response.” Buffy spoke up with a wry grin.
“I’m just—getting a haircut usually gives me an anxiety attack. I take maybe an inch off each time and it took me years to find someone I trust and—Usually one of the potentials does it because having sharp implements near my face—and the last time I tried someone new she loped off half a foot.”
“Seriously? Commandos.” Raj pointed out.
Alex shot him a miserable look.
Buffy laughed. “No, I get I haven’t changed my hair in years, It’s basically always been long and blonde—So I get the hair based anxiety. But the red might be a little much. Not very blendy.”
“Fine, fine.” Alex said with a sigh. “But I’m not cutting it.” She marched into the salon ahead of them.
Raj was about to follow her when Buffy held him aside for a second.
“Hey, Raj, do you think you could hang out with Lex for a second?”
“Where are you going?” he asked.
“I have something I have to do.”
They settled Alex in the chair and between the teenager’s meager German and Raj’s assorted languages they were able to tell the stylist—who was Romanian—what she was looking for. Raj agreed to look after the shopping and Buffy headed off down the brightly lit hall towards a store she had seen earlier and put aside until now.
*****
She stared at the test.
She couldn’t believe that she had not thought of it before; and now here she was sitting in a cubicle in a Czech shopping mall. She stuffed the test back into the wrapper and steeled herself to go outside.
She crossed the hall and rejoined Alex and Raj, she did her very best to keep her face neutral. Neither of her companions noticed that anything was amiss.
Alex had decided to go back to her natural brunette which was a wee bit darker that Spike’s natural color. The Romanian woman was yammering away mentioning some names they should have maybe known and gesturing to show she meant bangs but Alex shook her head so vigorously the woman laughed and dropped the subject.
Buffy studied the girl in the mirror, Alex had gotten almost everything from Spike. She had the long angular face and bright blue eyes. The lips and the bumpy nose, however, were hers.
God, this was so weird.
Alex was hers; her daughter with Spike. From another place where she and Spike had made her and she had not been some ghastly experiment.
Maybe the Buffy back in Sunnydale would have been a little bit disgusted, she would have thought that if she was going to have a daughter by a vampire she better be tall with chocolate brown eyes and Angel’s wide mouth. But this Buffy, this Buffy had seen Spike, starving and half-dead, sleep next to her and protect her instead of leave her in the cold, drain her dry or use her as his slayer sponsored cure-all. This Buffy had slept next to him when he was for all intents and purposes, un-chipped. This Buffy had seen what Spike could do and she knew with utmost certainty if he could take care of her, his mortal enemy because he had promised to do so, his daughter had nothing to worry about.
Okay, maybe not nothing there was definitely something to worry about but nothing they couldn’t handle.
She realized Alex was looking at her expectantly. She had been asked a question while her though had been running around a million miles away.
“Oh,” Buffy replied a little absently. “went off to grab some essentials from the drugstore. Cream rinse, Tooth brushes, No biggie.”
She had, in fact, gotten cream rinse as a cover. Not that she was going to use it. The Demon’s place they were staying in was great to crash but clearly Balats had little need to shower—or at least didn’t maintain them. Still, improvised plumbing was better than what they had at that B&B back in Newcastle.
Both Alex and Raj’s looks told her she wasn’t being very convincing. The thunderstruck look on her face was probably pretty telling. She worried for a moment about Alex asking about things she was so not ready to talk about and then see right through all of Buffy’s stammering like her father always did. She turned to Raj and gave him a pleading look.
“Hey you know,” Raj said. “There’s a McDonald’s somewhere here, feel like grabbing some familiar nosh?”
Alex looked so delighted that the two adults laughed and ushered her out and back into the mall.
*****
There was a strange keening sound coming from the apartment when they arrived at the warehouse. Despite the bags, Buffy and Alex broke into a run. The charged into the living quarters to see Spike and Wesley both drunk out of their minds, standing on the couch and singing in a language that could not have been English.
“—nemini parceteur,”
“parcetes!”
“No, Spike the pluperfect tense.”
“Right”
“—vivant membra qualibet!” they sang. It was a little difficult to pin point which one was on-key, if any. It was yet unclear whether they were harmonizing or singing together or if they were singing the same song. “Vivant membra quaelibet, semper sint in flor. Vivant omnes vigines! Faciles—”
Wesley started to giggle at this point.
“Faciles et formosae!” Wesley started to all out laugh.
“Bugger it, Oxford!” Spike roared. “You ruined the bloody harmony!!”
“Harmony was happening?” Buffy asked. She had dropped all her shopping and had her arms crossed over her chest.
The boys turned so quickly Wesley slipped off the couch and landed in a groaning tangled heap on the floor. Spike’s eyes narrowed and he took another long swig out of the bottle.
“Buffy! You are back rather soon. Is it soon? has it been soon?” Wesley asked from his position on the floor. “What brings you here?”
“Stores closed.” Buffy said matter-of-factly, her attention, however was on the vampire that was studiously avoiding her eyes.
At that moment, Raj burst through the door, he was holding his shopping as if he would chuck it at whatever threat Buffy and Alex were facing.
“Get back you fuckers, I’ll have you know I am deadly with throwing weapons!”
When he saw the state of the room he lowered his throwing arm. Wesley burbled something vaguely welcoming from the floor. Raj glanced at the girls for explanation.
“I’m curious,” Buffy said in lieu of answering his obvious unspoken question. “What was your thought process if evil didn’t, say, run away screaming at your formidable… shopping?”
“Maybe my high pitched screaming may irritate them?” Raj replied matter-of-factly. “What happened to Wyndy?”
“Don’t call me Wyndy!”
Buffy approached the couch to take a look at the bottle Spike was holding. Spike edged away from her, still not looking away from his spot on the wall. Buffy stopped and studied him. Any other day Spike would be all over the “wyndy”comment.
“They must have found the liquor cabinet.” Alex informed him. She had been holding the takeout they were bringing to Wesley and she set it down in front of him, Wes, who had not yet gotten up, tore into the bag.
“I’m not sure if LA has ruined him but he’s not complaining about the state of the chips” Raj said rather incredulously. “so hand me some of that sauce because it must be brilliant.”
Buffy slid onto the couch and playfully shoved Spike. “C’mon, not-so-bleached-wonder, hand me the drinkies.”
She wasn’t expecting the vehemence of the vampire’s shoving of the bottle into her hands before storming off into the room. There was a resounding clang as he threw the huge metal barn door shut. Buffy looked from Raj to Wesley. Wes wasn’t being particularly forthcoming or helpful; he was shoving mouthfuls of McDonald’s French fries into his mouth. Buffy’s eyes finally zeroed in on Alex who was studiously unloading sweater after chunky-knit sweater and a blazer from her shopping bags. The slayer kept her eyes on the girl until finally she gave up and turned to the younger version of her own mother.
“He may have heard something—maybe you didn’t want him to.” She said wadding up a couple of plaid flannel shirts.
Fuck. She realized instantly what the vampire heard. She mentally cursed every power that is was or could ever have been for stupid vampire hearing. Then she marched over to the barn door and pushed it open and before anyone could get any ideas she shut it behind her.
*****
Spike’s head was swimming. He and Wesley had been downing the whiskey pretty quickly. Everything around him was fuzzy around the edges except for the memory of Buffy saying she wanted to abort her baby. His baby. Wesley had pointed out that it might not be a baby at all and Spike had lunged at him so ferociously the chip fired and that had sent him back into the couch; which of course sent Wesley into hysterics. Most of the night was still a blur until he was standing on the couch singing a drinking song from his Oxford days, and then she was home and he couldn’t ignore it anymore.
And now he was sitting in here. Sitting and trying very hard not to think about children and siblings and family. He kept thinking of Alex. Alex was his; is his. And she wanted to stay here, in this dimension. He was wrestling with the guilt of leaving her, even though he wasn’t completely sure of the details of his departure, but he was pissed as all hell he had to miss her grow up and he had been extremely excited to maybe see that in Alex 2.0; this dimension’s version. And Buffy wanted to take that away from him. And she was probably not thinking about that, she was probably thinking of something else, he vaguely remembered reasons but he couldn’t think about those right now. Right now, he could only be angry and let that work its way out of his system.
He heard the door open and then clang shut.
Bugger. That bint never could just let things be.
“We need to talk, not-so-bleach boy.”
He felt something hit him on the head. She had chucked something at him. It was small and plastic and cylindrical.
“What is this?”
“Look at it.” Buffy snapped.
It was a little plastic pregnancy test. Somewhere in Spike’s mind alarm bells went off, but all that registered in that moment was how humans usually figured out whether or not they were pregnant.
“Bloody hell, slayer, did you piss on this? Did you chuck some of your pee at me?” he demanded. “What the devil was that for?”
“Telling me I was pregnant!” Buffy shouted at him.
Spike looked at her in disbelief.
“Slayer, what are you bloody on about?” he demanded exasperatedly as he reached down and picked up the little plastic cylinder. There was a little window in it with a faint pink line across it. It was clearly upsetting the slayer. She glared at him expectantly. “I haven’t the foggiest what I’m lookin’ at.”
“Negative! It was negative, Spike!” Buffy exploded. “You and your stupid theories that you were so fucking sure about were of course was all I could think about today because duh! So, I am this close to making you into vamp flavored soup mix chip or no chip!”
Spike was trying to make sense of everything; he was fighting against a half a bottle of the Balat demon’s finest whiskey. There was a dull, familiar throb starting behind his left eye. The chip comment stung.
Buffy seemed to have just been picking up steam.
“What the hell gives you the right to tell me I’m pregnant by-by- by them when you weren’t even sure? Spike it’s all I’ve been able to think about, all day, that they put something into me that I never wanted! “ she was clearly livid. “You have absolutely no idea what that feels like! How violated I felt?”
Spike removed the hand from his head and arched an eyebrow.
That took the wind out of her sails for a moment.
“Okay so maybe a teensy fraction of an idea. But that stupid chip is not a baby! You said there is a baby! A baby like a tiny person! And that is the best case scenario!” she was quickly picking up speed again. She realized what she had said. “Was. Was the best case scenario since I’m not pregnant.”
“Yes you are!”
“Thank you, Spike, I’m really glad you’re here to provide all the expertise you’ve gotten from being an infertile vampire for a hundred years and repressed Victorian male before that! You know how you are all renowned for understanding the inner workings of human lady parts.”
Spike groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose. He had to physically remind himself that he didn’t want to rip her head off and drink from her brainstem. She was impossible, ridiculous and clearly not finished.
“God! I can’t believe I listened to you and crusty Wesley Wyndham-Pryce of all people! Just because you interpreted the great puzzle that was ‘Genesis’ because it’s latin for making things.”
“Genesis is greek.”
She hit him hard on the nose.
Spike roared angrily his hands flying to his face which was in full vamp mode.
“Argh! You bitch!”
“Fuck you, Spike!” Buffy exploded. She jabbed him again. “This isn’t happening to you! You didn’t think you had to give birth to something that you would then have to slay! You didn’t think a scientists came at you with a demonic turkey baster! And I was being bozo-Buffy just going along with it! Slayer to the rescue! And where the hell do you get off telling me these things? Did you just want to fuck with me? Did you want to fulfill some sick human wish or something trivial like that? You just wanted a family? I thought you were on my side! I thought—”
“No you didn’t think. You never think about anything except how this pertains to you!” Spike finally growled back. His fists were clenched at his side in an effort not to retaliate. He had gone back to his human face but his eyes were yellow. “What possible reason would I have to lie to you, slayer? What would the point be?”
“I don’t know!” Buffy snapped. “I don’t presume to understand the motivations of soul-less bloodsuckers!”
She regretted it immediately. Not only because she didn’t really mean it, it had been an automatic retort but it she and Wesley had discussed it and Spike heard. He heard the bit about having no soul being an issue. And Spike’s drunkenness meant his face was completely unguarded and he looked so wounded at her comment that she wanted nothing more than to reach out and snatch it back, but Spike didn’t let her.
“Bloody hell, Summers! Again that bloody fucking soul! That’s what you’re worried about isn’t it that I don’t have a soul and I can’t make junior have one? Well let me tell you something, missy, those people who captured you, tortured you and all that? They’re human. It the mother fucking vampire who took you in. kept you safe and made sure you were sleeping properly! You think it’s easy draggin’ you along?”
“Spike, I don’t—”
“I am so bleedin’ buggerin’ motherfucking sick of you assuming that all vampires and demons are fucking mayhem machines! Everything I’ve done in that last month has been to protect you. For your good; not mine. I wanted to do that! And I think you know why!”
The only sound in the room was Spike’s chest heaving. They glared at each other for a long moment neither willing to back down.
“I know there’s a bun in the oven because I can hear it, slayer.” Spike continued after a spell. “I can hear its little heart goin’ and I know it’s human or whatever version of human the minion claims.” His hand twitched. He wanted a cigarette more than anything in the world. “and I’m over the moon about it. Never thought I’d get this chance. And here you are swimming in denial just as fast as you can and talkin’ to Oxford about getting rid of it.” He held up his hand when she looking like she was about to launch into another tirade. “Imagine my surprise. I thought you would trust me about this. Thought you would—care enough to talk to me about it. In this together, yeah?”
Buffy stared at him suddenly feeling incredibly stupid. The anger had drained out of her and she wanted desperately to be angry again. Or take back the last twenty minutes and do it over again so she could articulate her point better, so she could make him understand how wrong he was. Spike was in his own world.
The silence was deafening.
“Spike,”
“Get out.”
He didn’t shout. She sort of wished he had. Spike was loud. He was a screamer and she knew how to deal with Spike when he was yelling. This quiet, hurt Spike she didn’t know how to handle.
“No! Listen, we need to—”
“Just go, Buffy.”
She stiffened. Whenever he used her name it was like some sort of hot poker right into her spine. She turned and walked out of the room.
*****
There was a mad scramble as Buffy pushed aside the giant wall panel. Despite the care she took to close it, it closed with a loud clang.
“You guys suck at spying.”
Wesley looked up from the main L shaped couch and the Czech fashion magazine he had been reading upside down.
“Oh, Buffy, you’re here.” He said stupidly.
Both Raj and Alex glared at him from their fake card game a few feet away and around a low table that normally held a hookah.
“Seriously?” Buffy said flatly. “How have we managed to thwart the forces of evil?”
She threw herself into the low couch and eyed the cards Alex was holding, they were naked tarot cards.
The damphyr dropped them guiltily.
Raj followed suit but instead of shrinking back he rolled his eyes. “Oh, come off it, Buffy you’d be doing it if it was anyone else was in there an there was enough shouting..”
Both Wesley and Alex looked at him like he was insane and then braced themselves for Buffy’s wrath. Alex was preemptively cringing.
Buffy just slumped. “You might be right.”
“The test, that’s why you went off?” Raj asked in a much gentler tone.
“Ha! Lot of good it did. It said I’m no baby on board Buffy and that doesn’t seem to be the case since Spike hears the pitter patter of little hearts.”
They all automatically turned to Wesley for answers. He was still holding his copy of JenProzny. He thought it over for a few moments.
“Actually, Buffy, I'm more inclined to believe Spike over this test. There are such a thing as false negatives. A heartbeat is a more difficult thing to manufacture.” Wesley straightened up looking thoughtful.
"Spike's been wrong before."
"Er-yes, but its more than that, see, tests of this nature measure chemicals and hormones that have to do with normal human pregnancy which is not the case here. Science tends to rely on precedent and I think we can safely say that nothing like this has happened before.”
“Except for--you know--me.” Alex piped up almost lazily.
“Right. Except you.” Wes conceded. “But in this dimension it’s the first time which means that there is no way to accurately test for it. Spike’s hearing may well be the most accurate indicator we have.”
Buffy looked cautiously hopeful. And then crestfallen again.
"So it's not a normal pregnancy. I'm going to be having a bouncy baby hell-fire breathing demon."
"Buffy," Wesley said reproachfully. "You must stop thinking the worst of this. precedent remember? You have a damphyr right in front of you and Spike has heard a heartbeat. Both good indications that what your carrying is human." he decided not to hedge around the how human Alex was. That was a battle best fought later.
“So on the one hand, family way. But on the other there’s a chance that the test was negative not because there’s an apocalyptic demon that’s going to Alien its was out of me?”
Wes looked puzzled but Raj and Alex nodded so he nodded as well.
“Although,” Raj said thoughtfully. “Now that you bring that up I’d rather like to see that.”
Buffy threw a pillow at him.
Wesley, however looked troubled.
Alex noticed this and prodded him gently.
“Sorry, it just, it occurs to me that having an irregular pregnancy would make the gestation difficult and we can’t really risk a demon doctor or healing shaman. Vampire pregnancys are unprecedented so the word of one would be a fairly easy trail to follow. That’s if they can help at all.” He frowned in the direction of the bedroom. Everyone knew that it was because it was the sort of question he would usually ask Spike.
Buffy folded her arms in front of her chest.
“Yeah? Well, if you want to talk to mopey in there be my guest. But he was all quiet-angry so maybe give him a little time to let it simmer down from a murderous rage to a nice, benevolent brood.” She said making it clear she was not leaving the couch.
Wesley harkened back to his half remembered conversation with the vampire over drinks. While Spike vehemently denied any similarities with his grand-sire, the sulking was familiar territory. He ignored the looks from everyone and ventured into the seldom used kitchenette in search of water. By now the buzz had subsided and the grease from his dinner may have helped but he needed to be hydrated because he could feel the mother of all hangovers coming on. The Balat demon had no normal glasses just funky plastic martini grasses and novelty shot glasses and what appeared to be a large glass boot.
“Perhaps this can wait until morning?” he said wearily. “we did thwart the forces of evil this morning. I could use some recharging.”
There was nothing but mixers and off brand soda in the fridge so Wesley poured himself a plastic martini glass of tonic water and tried not to think about how much he wanted a cup of tea.
Everyone set about bedding down for the night. The apartment was made for parties so other than the large L shaped couch there were several other love seats and other potential bedding strewn about. Alex made a nest of harem pillows next to the table she and Raj had used to pretend to be playing cards with the Tarot deck. Raj pushed a fea bean bags agast a loveseat to give him ample space to spread his lanky frame. Wesley began work on the couch.
Buffy stood awkwardly in the sea of activity torn between going back into the room with Spike, pride be damned or preparing her own place to sleep tonight. She glanced longingly at the orange panel.
She felt a soft tap on her shoulder. Alex was holding out a knitted throw. she nodded at the couch. She had only really been with them for a day, Buffy realized. It felt like so much longer than just a day, but Alex had really no idea why they were doing this or her background with Spike. Or maybe she did because she was future-girl. thinking about it was making her head hurt. But Alex didn’t know about the nightmares, that sleeping next to a warrior she trusted as much as Spike kept them away. Alex didn’t know that she had not spent the night away from him since really, last night and even then she had succumbed to sheer exhaustion more than slept. Wes was studying her all kindly which was making her want to scream and Raj was already asleep on the other side of the room.
“I’m sure if you--”
Buffy’s eyes narrowed.
“Shut up, Wesley.” she said. She shoved the pillows over on the far side of the L and threw herself down. For a second she wondered if she would even get to sleep but when she was gone before she could even finish the thought.
The forest was dark but Buffy didn’t need light to know where she was. She would know this place anywhere. She was running again, she didn’t remember starting but then she barely remembered starting last time. Spike was running next to her.
She would never forget this night as long as she lived. Adrenaline had run thick in her blood and had shielded her from all but the worst pain of running barefoot in the woods. But this time, this time she could feel every single rip and every single tear in her feet. She couldn’t make herself stop even if she wanted to. She felt branches tear her hair and whip into her eyes and scratch her through the thin material of her clothes. She didn’t even remember what she had been wearing. There was also the cold. It was a wet northern cold that got into your bones and at the time she didn’t feel it but she felt it now.
There was a snarling from behind her.
It wasn’t guards behind them this time, it was wolves. Guards they could outrun but wolves were catching up to them snapping at their heels. She and Spike were running through bushes and up hills half mad with fear She could see a clearing up ahead she could see the cave they had hid in and felt teeth clam around her legs and pull her down.
She was bleeding and she had no idea what had happened to Spike. She no longer remembered Spike all she could of think of now was pain. IT was an intense pain unlike anything she had felt in all her years as a slayer, Indescribable and right at the core of her being.
she wasn’t lying on the uneven floor of the forest, she was already back in the room she was on the metal gurney spread-eagle and screaming while something that felt like dynamite went off under her abdomen. She was screaming so hard she was hoarse. Above her she saw the blue hands, they were attached to a face a face with very green eyes. the blue hands reached into her and push themselves out of her stomach. She was screaming hoarsely now, sobbing and beggin to make it stop. The hands were holding a tiny screaming child, red like fire with little blue hands. It stopped squirming suddenly and looked at Buffy with empty black eyes.
It reached up and slowly began to rip the doctor who had delivered it with his little blue hands until all that was left was pieces. As it did so, the blood drained from it and it looked just like a perfectly normal baby. Its eyes were the same green as the doctor's.
Buffy felt herself go rigid. She couldn’t even scream. She couldn’t move.
It lunged at her.
Buffy jerked awake. It was still dark out, but the sky was paler somehow as if it was going to be dawn soon. The room was silent and still. She could make out the shapes of her companions. So she hadn’t woken them but maybe this time she wasn’t screaming in her sleep, last time she could scream this time she was so horrified, so scared that she couldn’t move.
She cursed herself for being so weak. They had made her this way, scared and paranoid. And instead of bringing the fight to them she was running away. She knew all the arguments for it, she knew Spike wasn’t at a hundred percent and they still didn’t understand what Alex was and the Project might be a bigger organization than they thought but she still couldn’t help but feel like she was running away.
She wondered if the clang of the door would get everyone up. She could just go back and be with Spike and her nightmare would go away. She would sink into the not quite restful but not terrifying dream-less sleep. And maybe she would do the same for him. She needed it more than he did and really she was being considerate of him.
Wow. That was weak Buffy talking. That was giving-up Buffy. She was the slayer dammit she was not that weak little thing that they had starved and experimented on. She was well-rested, well trained and bloody well pissed off and she was going to bring the fight to them and burn them to the ground and salt the ashes. Weak-o Buffy would not be able to deal with what was coming in the next few months. A little bit of wiggins was not going to make her fall asleep. She would use these dreams to remember the lay out of the place or the details of it and use them to rain all that hell fire she was thinking off.
She forced herself to think of precedent, Alex was a normal girl. she could be in the sunlight and other than truly abysmal eating habits she didn't devour humans to take on their characteristics. She glanced over at Alex, the girl had one hand flung over her head and was drooling. That picture helped.
Resolve face firmly in place she punched her pillow to fluff it and yanked her covers up around her.
The next thing she knew it was daylight. There had been no more nightmares.
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Author's Chapter Notes:
Hi I know it's been a long time. I'm sorry, I'm so so sorry but this is a nice long one for you! and I'll have another chapter up by this weekend I'm just trying to bring you Spuffy and they are being stubborn but I did put them through a lot so I'm not going to force it.
I love you all and sorry it's been so long. I'll be better I promise!
I love you all and sorry it's been so long. I'll be better I promise!
Chapter End Notes:
There! Hope you liked it the next one will be up this weekend I promise!!