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Author's Chapter Notes:
A flashback chapter........yes another one.
3 weeks before before Vegas...

Buffy slipped through the crowd of her favourite nightclub effortlessly, scanning her head, looking for her friend. When she spotted Dawn at the bar, knocking back shots she put on a smile so wide it made her face hurt.

“Hey girl,” Buffy said, hugging her friend.

Buffy didn’t know how she could even look at Dawn. Not after how she’d….

Nope, Buffy thought. Not going there. At all.

“Buffy,” Dawn screeched in her friend’s ear, returning the hug. Buffy winced. Dawn already sounded like she’d had five too many.

“You know I’ve been here for like, the last hour,” Dawn said, knitting her brow. “You left me hanging bitch. We were supposed to meet at 10.”

Buffy checked her watch, then let out an exasperated sigh.

“It’s ten fifteen,” Buffy said, raising a brow.

“Felt like a goddamn hour,” Dawn mumbled, then shrugged. “So what are you drinking?”

“I think I’ll stick to coke,” Buffy said, shaking her head, giving the barkeep a thankful smile when he laid it on the counter. “So, where’s Xander?”

Buffy felt her voice falter slightly in her own ear.

Oh god, Buffy thought. Why did I ask that? Could you be more obvious, you fucking slut?

“Well,” Dawn said. “It’s Friday night. So I’ll give you one goddamn guess.”

“Working late,” Buffy said. “Same as William.”

Buffy missed the nervous look that crossed Dawn’s face.

Oh god, Dawn thought. She’d had to have a few drinks to even work up the courage to face Buffy. She was worried she’d just blurt something wildly inappropriate out.

“I’ll drink to that,” Dawn said, leaning over to order another shot from the barkeep and knocking it back.

“To our dumbass husbands?” Buffy asked, raising her own glass. “Who’d rather be working then spending the evening with a couple of hotties like us?”

“To our dumbass husbands,” Dawn said, clinking the glasses together. The girls held each other’s gaze, then laughed uproariously.

An hour later, Buffy found herself slightly tipsy too, as the girls talked, accepting free drinks that were invariably sent their way by strangers, shooting down any that dared approach them.

“Are you happy Dawn?” Buffy found herself asking.

Oh god, I’m drunk. I shouldn’t be talking.

“Of course,” Dawn said, almost reflexively. “Aren’t you?”

“I am,” Buffy said, idly stroking the stem of her glass. “It’s just….”

“Just what?” Dawn probed.

“Oh nothing,” Buffy sighed. “Just me being silly. That’s all.”

Dawn was silent for a moment.

“Well actually,” Dawn said, then fumbled for the right words as Buffy’s ears perked up.

“Yeah?” Buffy said.

“It’s nothing,” Dawn said.

“Clearly,” Buffy said, amused by her friend’s discomfort. “Nothing at all.”

“Shut up,” Dawn said. “Skank.”

“Ooooh,” Buffy teased. “Slut-shaming. Will women on women violence never end?”

“I hate you,” Dawn snorted with laughter, abandoning her pretense of being mad.

“So,” Buffy said. “Are you going to spill or what?”

“It’s just,” Dawn sighed deeply.

“Just……..” Buffy prompted.

“Xander,” Dawn mumbled.

“What about him?” Buffy said carefully, even as her eyes widened and she felt a small ache begin between her legs.

“It’s just…” Dawn began. “I mean it’s not that he….”

“Urgh,” Dawn said in frustration. “Just forget it.”

Buffy knew she shouldn’t say another word. Not another word. Just let it go.

“You can tell me” Buffy found herself saying to her shame. “Dawnie…it’s me.”

Oh god. I can’t believe I played the it’s me card. I’m such a bad friend.

“I don’t think I’m drunk enough to say it,” Dawn said, ducking her head.

“I think you’re drunk enough for the bar,” Buffy quipped, earning a glare from her friend.

“So….” Buffy said, elbowing Dawn.

“Don’t rush me,” Dawn glowered.

“Would you just come out and…….” Buffy said exasperatedly.

“Xanderstooniceinbed,” Dawn said quickly.

Buffy blinked. What? Did she just? Wait, what?

Xander,” Buffy said. “Is too……nice…… in bed?”

Dawn glared. “Say it a little louder will you.”

The ache between Buffy’s knees grew a little. She found herself wanting to know more.

“What do you mean exactly?” Buffy said, as if she hadn’t heard Dawn’s retort.

Dawn looked away and rolled her eyes. As if Buffy didn’t know exactly what she meant. Why was her friend torturing her?

“He’s just……Xander okay,” Dawn said. “You know…..Xander like.”

“And that’s a bad thing?” Buffy said unsurely.

“No,” Dawn said. “It’s not. It’s really not. I mean, I love Xander. He’s a sweet, sexy, funny guy. It’s just that….”

“He’s too…..” Buffy said, her lips slightly quirking into a smile.

“Xander,” Dawn finished tamely. The girls exchanged an embarasssed look, then lapsed into silence.

Buffy found herself wondering exactly how nice Xander would be….

Dawn didn’t know why she just didn’t let that conversation end.

“Bet you don’t have that problem with Spi…….Will,” Dawn said, catching herself.

She glanced at Buffy. Thankfully her friend didn’t seem to notice Dawn’s slip of the tongue. Buffy seemed to be lost in a world of her own.

“Buffy?” Dawn interrupted her reviere.

“Hmmmm?” Buffy said, jerking her head back to reality.

“I said, I bet you don’t seem to have that problem withWill,” Dawn said, making sure she focused on the name William.

“We’re not talking about me,” Buffy said, outraged.

“The hell we’re not,” Dawn retorted. “Now spill.”

She’d given Buffy the goods on her and Xander. The least Buffy could do was return the favour.

“William’s………you know,” Buffy finished lamely. “Will.”

“I don’t know,” Dawn said pointedly, folding her hands over her hips and drumming her fingers expectantly. Oh she knew. She just wanted Buffy to say it.

Buffy tried to hold up, but found herself wilting under Dawn’s judgemental gaze.

“Okay,” Buffy said finally. “But this stays between us. Right?”

“Totally,” Dawn said. God, so she wanted to hear this.

Buffy took a breath. God she was drunk. Not much, but enough. Shut up, shut up, shut up.

“Sp….” Buffy began, then caught herself. This time Dawn raised a brow. Spike? Again? Interesting.

“Will,” Buffy corrected herself. “He’s……..”

Dawn waited patiently.

“He’s a fucking animal,” Buffy whispered leaning in. “No, I mean seriously. Like you can’t imagine. Like....like the world is ending.”

Dawn tried to look surprised and was glad when she saw Buffy nodding, as if to confirm the surprise.

“I know,” Buffy said. “Shocking right?”


“And you like that?” Dawn said slowly.

Dawn didn’t know what she was doing. Why she was fishing in these dangerous waters. All she knew is that the images from that day were crossing her mind, making her dangerously light headed.

“I love it,” Buffy said.

“Always?” Dawn asked, trying to conceal the interest lighting up her eyes.

“Hmmm?” Buffy said.

“He’s….like…an animal,” Dawn said. “Always?”

“Well……...” Buffy looked unusually lost for words. “Kinda.”

“And you…..love it,” Dawn said, straining the last two words disbelievingly. "Always."

“I do,” Buffy insisted.

A long pause followed.

“Mostly,” Buffy added.

The girls looked at each other, not knowing how turned on the other one was.

“We should really shut up now,” Dawn said, looking away.

“Totally,” Buffy said, mirroring Dawn’s actions. “We should never speak of this again.”

“Deal,” Dawn said, catching her breath.

Nope, not imagining. Not at all.

Dawn glanced at Buffy. Her friend was shaking her head and snorting.

“What?” Dawn asked.

“Oh nothing,” Buffy said, straining to hold back a giggle. “Just a crazy thought.”

“Which is?” Dawn said.

“Xander’s way too….. Xander for you,” Buffy said chuckling.

“Hey,” Dawn protested, “William is way too Sp….Willam for you!”

Dawn’s eyes widened at the near slip of her tongue, but once again, Buffy didn’t seem to notice. Her friend was somewhere far, staring off into space.

“I know,” Buffy said idly. Then suddenly Buffy was back.

“Is it possible we married the wrong men?” she asked, raising a brow. Dawn matched her raised brow with her own. The girls held each other’s gaze for a moment.

“Nah,” they said together, then burst out into laughter.

“Wouldn’t it be crazy though?” Buffy said, wiping her eyes.

“What?” Dawn said.

“Me and Xander," Buffy said.

"You and William.” she quickly added at Dawn's incredulous look. The girls laughed, looked away, then looked at each other again. The same thought was going through their minds. It was an intruiging thought. Erotic even. But neither of them wanted to admit it.

“We’re talking hypothetically?” Dawn said slowly. “Right?”

“Totally,” Buffy assured her.

The girls didn’t know why, but they felt a need to talk about it.
The idea. If only just to talk. .

“So....let’s say…..we…. ” Dawn began skittishly.

“Go home,” Buffy finished. “Hypothetically.”

Dawn nodded sagely. Totally. Hypothetically. Of course.

“And then……” Dawn stammered unsurely. “We….”

God, Dawn thought, I can’t even say it

“We switch…..” Buffy began. When she saw the shock in Dawn’s eyes she reached across to pick up Dawn’s black purse.

“Purses,” Buffy finished, holding Dawn’s purse in her hand.

Dawn looked at Buffy’s golden purse. It was innocently lying on the counter.

“Purses,” Dawn mumbled, reaching over to pickup Buffy’s golden purse. "Yeah."

A moment passed as each girl weighed the purse in her hand, enjoying the feel of it.

“How does it feel?” Buffy asked, cheekily nudging her friend with an elbow.

Dawn felt bad. In a good way. In a very very good way.

“You tell me,” Dawn said pointedly, not wanting to answer the question. Buffy didn't want to answer the question either. Despite her teasing of Dawn, Buffy felt good. Really, really good. So good it was all kinds of wrong.

“You wanna keep mine?” Buffy teased.

“You wanna keep mine?” Dawn retorted heatedly.

“For like an hour,” Buffy said possessively ran her hand over the purse.

“Just an hour?” Dawn appraised Buffy with a haughty look.

“Wouldn’t want to wear it out,” Buffy said snidely. “Would we?”

“Speak for yourself,” Dawn muttered, stroking the golden purse with her fingers, something Buffy didn’t fail to notice.

God, Dawn thought. Being worn out sounded amazing.
Especially if a certain blue eyed british man was doing the wearing out.

“They’d never go for it,” Dawn added hastily. “Our purses I mean. Hypothetically”

“Are you sure about that?” Buffy said, cocking an eyebrow.

“Hells yeah,” Dawn insisted. “My purse would never…..”

“I bet he….” Buffy spoke, then corrected herself. “It. I bet it does.”

Dawn’s mouth opened and closed in outrage.

“As. If,” Dawn huffed finally, tossing her hair over her shoulders.

“I bet it’s thought about it,” Buffy added pointedly. “A lot. A. Lot.”

Dawn shot her friend a dirty look.

“As if your purse hasn’t,” Dawn fumed. “Your purse would be so easy.”

“You wish,” Buffy snorted.

“Wanna bet?” Dawn challenged.

“I just might,” Buffy said, holding her gaze.

Buffy and Dawn opened their mouths to continue to argue, but then a moment passed and they realized how absurd they were being. And then they burst out laughing as well.

“God,” Buffy said. “We must be out of our minds.”

“We’re just wasted,” Dawn said.

“Friends?” Buffy said, making to hand Dawn her black purse.

“Friends,” Dawn sighed, handing Buffy’s golden purse back to her.

Buffy took the golden purse and held it close, but then refused to let go of Dawn’s black purse.

“Buffy,” Dawn said dangerously. “Let go of my purse.”

“Well,” Buffy replied innocently. “Looks like your purse wants to stay. It can’t get enough. I don’t blame it.”

And then Buffy released the black purse with a laugh and did a little victory dance that reminded Dawn of snoopy. Dawn returned the favour by swatting her friend in the stomach with the black purse, knocking the wind out of her. Soon, the matter receded into the background as the drinks continued to flow.

But later that night, as the girls’ stood at the entrance of their own houses, they exchanged a final look. There was only one question on each of their minds.

What if I went into the other house? Just for tonight?

“Night Dawn,” Buffy said.

“Night Buffy,” Dawn said.

The question continued to haunt them long into the night.





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