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Chapter 16 –- No Apologies, No Regrets


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Buffy continued to stare at the phone tucked securely in its cradle. She abruptly cut off the conversation she was having with her Watcher not five minutes before. In her heart she knew that she should call back and explain herself. Give all of them more information than she did but she just couldn’t bring herself to do so. Inhaling sharply she once again picked up the phone and dialed the number she knew so well.

The phone barely rang once before she heard the frantic voice of her Watcher at the other end pleading with her to answer him.

“Giles…”

“Thank God, Buffy. I thought I’d lost you again. I beg you not to do anything like that again. Please at least tell me where you are and who you’re with. Are you alone with just Spike or are there others with you?”

Buffy couldn’t help but smile at her Watchers’ string of questions. No matter what something seem to never change.

“I’m not with just Spike… I’m with some old friends but we’re both okay, I promise.”

“Buffy who on earth are you with?”

“Raz… he’s a good friend of mine. I knew him back when Merrick was my Watcher. We also ran into him in New York and now again here.”

”Buffy I beg you to tell me where is there? Where are you?”

As soon as the phone rang again Giles practically dove for the receiver. The Scoobs and what was left of the AI team looked on with bated breath as the former Watcher spoke into the phone. Xander and Willow stood right behind Giles as he spoke with his former charge; both trying to listen as best they could to the conversation taking place.

Giles listen intently as he waited for his Slayer to answer. He knew that right now she depended too much on the bleached vampire and that he was going to extremely careful with the way he handled things if he ever wanted to see his Slayer again.

‘England’ the word was so softly spoken that the former bad boy had to ask her to repeat herself.

“I’m sorry love, where did you say you were?”

“I said that I’m in England Giles. You know Jolly ole’ England, the mother country.”

“Ah I see, I think I need to sit down now”

Buffy listened intently as she heard the shifting of a chair. Finally hearing her Watcher sigh heavily she almost feared what would be said next.

“Buffy…”

The tiny blonde cringed slightly as she heard the red heads’ voice hit her ears. She knew that she was going to have to deal with her friends at one time or another.

“Hey Wills, how ya been?” trying to be as casual as possible

Instantly Buffy knew that was the wrong thing to say because at the other end of the phone the once mellow sounding red head was ranting and raving and it didn’t look like she was going to stop anytime soon.

“How have I been? HOW HAVE I BEEN!?!? WHAT THE HELL KINDA QUESTION IS THAT TO ASK BUFFY!?! You just pick… pick up and leave without ANY kind of warning or even notice. You have Giles here going out of his mind; you had Angel travel across country… ACROSS COUNTRY BUFFY! Just to find YOU! And on top of all that Buffy you take of with Spike… SPIKE of all people for Christ Sake! I mean SPIKE, he isn’t even a person; he’s a FUCKING DEMON and…”

The tiny blonde felt her body begin to shake whether it was from repressed tears or rage she wasn’t too sure all she knew what that she was being yelled at for things that weren’t her fault. She was being reprimanded by her so-called friend for things she did but in reality it was no ones business but her own.

So she did something she should’ve done a long time ago…

“WILLOW!”

“Huh?”

“It’s none of your business. What I do and where I go is all of MY business, let alone who I’m with. All of you left and went and did your own thing because all of YOU were hurting. And that’s perfectly fine but don’t you dare… DON’T YOU DARE throw accusations or point your finger at me Willow!” by the time the little blonde finished her speech tears were rolling down her cheeks unchecked.

Buffy had to take a breath to calm herself when she went to apologize for her outburst the voice of her Watcher was once again coming through the line.

“Buffy, are you still there?”

“Yeah I’m still here”

Sighing heavily Buffy listened as Giles tried to make excuses for Willows’ behavior but the Slayer was tired of hearing it and she then decided to leave a number with her Watcher saying it was for him only and then proceeded to hang up the phone.

Buffy stared at the phone for a few long moments before she felt hot tears begin to stream down her face; burying her face in her hands she never heard the door to the study open…

“Hey, are you okay?”

“Huh” Buffy looked up and was surprised to see a young woman in front of her standing no more than five feet five inches tall. She had purple hair and bright but dull blue eyes.

“Hey I’m Ciro and you must be Buffy. Tough convo huh?”

“Yeah I guess you could say that”

Ciro walked over to the Slayer and plopped down into the chair opposite her. She swung her legs over the side and stared at the Slayer for a long moment before jumping back up and holding a hand out to her. Buffy just looked at her if she was crazed, Ciro smiled at this and pulled the tiny Slayer up and out of the overstuffed chair.

“Look you’re the Slayer, you’re also 20 years old and you have to right to do what you want, when you want and one day that will just have to get through you’re so-called friends’ thick skulls. Now are you going to or not?”

“Going to?”

“To start living… remember no regrets, no apologies”

With that Ciro sauntered out of the study leaving a slightly confused but elated Slayer behind. For the first time since she’d been called Buffy felt free to do what she wanted when she wanted and tonight she was going to start living for herself again… she was going to take it back.

“No Regrets, No Apologies”

End of Chapter 16





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