It wasn't until Buffy staked the vampire she was fighting that she realized she was being watched. She put her hands on her hips, calling, "Spike, I know you're here. You might as well just come out."

Spike stepped from behind a mausoleum. His hands were in his duster pockets, and Buffy could swear he looked almost…nervous. "Hi, Buffy."

Buffy raised an eyebrow. Since when did he greet her like that? He had an almost boyish charm to him, and she had the urge to ruffle his hair, free his curls from the gel he'd used. Then she remembered she was mad at him. She glared, crossing her arms in front of her. "You know, I really didn't think I'd see you again."

Spike blinked, looking at her with confusion. "Where would I go?"

"Care to tell me why I woke up completely alone this morning?"

Spike was surprised. "You…you think I ran out on you this morning?"

"What else you would you call it?" Buffy snapped. "We fell asleep together, but when I woke up, you were gone. Looks like you fell right in with the Buffy pattern."

Spike's jaw ticked. "If you think so little of me to believe I'd do what those other wankers did, then that's exactly what I did. Just took what I wanted from you and left. Used you for my own sick and twisted means. Happy now?"

"Don't."

"Don't what? Tell you what you want to hear? Let you feel all vindicated and self-righteous like you love to do?"

"No. Try to make me think for a second that you're anything but a monster."

Spike narrowed his eyes at her. "Fine. I'll do that, and you can stop pretending you're anything but a self-absorbed bitch."

"Oh please, Spike. You're the evil one here—not me."

Spike was in front of her before she could blink. Temporarily forgetting he couldn't hurt her, Buffy felt a flash of fear. He grabbed her arm, shoving something roughly into her palm. "Happy birthday, Slayer," he said with a sneer before turning around and walking off.

Buffy opened her hand, her eyes widening in surprise. It was a locket. She flipped it over, her fingers brushing against where her first and middle names were engraved. Her head was reeling, trying to figure out how he'd even known it was her birthday. "Spike!" she called, but he didn't respond. She closed her eyes, fighting the urge to cry. "Why is he doing this to me?" she asked softly.

She decided to go back to her dorm. There was nothing she wanted more right then than to just curl up in her bed and go to sleep.

*** *** ***

"You say this thing breathes fire?"

"Uh huh. Almost scorched me."

Buffy arched an eyebrow. "We have to make this fast. I am so not in a slaying mood right now."

Buffy opened the door to the darkened rec room. Suddenly, the lights snapped on followed by a loud "Surprise!" Buffy surveyed the room, her eyes stopping on a "Happy 19th Birthday" banner.

She turned to Willow. "You know I'm going to kill you later, don't you?" she whispered through a smile.

"Xander made me. I tried to make him cancel after last night, but he wouldn't let me unless I explained why."

"Got it. Must kill Xander."

Willow gave her a sheepish look. "Or you could just party. Riley's here…"

Buffy's eyes grew wide as she saw Riley approaching then. Buffy put on her best smile. Maybe this party could be a good thing after all. It could make her stop thinking about Spike.

*** *** ***

Buffy sat alone in a corner, holding the locket Spike had given her. Riley was talking with some of his fellow commandos, and it gave her a good chance to sneak off, hoping no one would seek her out.

"It's your party, you know," Willow said, sitting next to Buffy.

"Yes, it is my party." Buffy gave Willow a half smile. "And I'll cry if I want to."

"Let me guess—certain bleach blond vamp got ya down?"

"Uh huh. Ran into him on patrol. He gave me a birthday gift."

"He did?!" Willow frowned. "It wasn't something naughty, was it?"

"No. Although I sort of wish it had been. That I think I could deal with. Could've just punched him in the nose and called him a pig." She handed the locket over to Willow. "He gave me this."

Willow gaped. "This is beautiful. And it looks really old…like antique old."

Buffy shrugged. "Not hard for a vampire I guess. For all I know, he pulled it off a victim a hundred years ago."

"Someone named Anne."

"Excuse me?"

"The inscription. The 'Anne' is in a different script than the 'Buffy.' And it looks a lot more worn."

"Let me see that," Buffy said, taking the locket back. She inspected it for herself, seeing that Willow was right. "So I guess it did belong to someone else…"

"Buffy, I know this is Spike and all, but I don't think this is some sort of trophy from a kill he kept for a long time. This is probably worth a lot of money, and you know how Spike is about money. Besides, he would've had to have kept it through all the wandering he's done over the years. That kinda leads me to think it was something important to him."

As much as Buffy didn't want it to, what Willow was saying made sense. "So then who was Anne? And if this locket was important to him, why did he give it to me?"

"Maybe he loves you."

"Loves me? Willow, this is Spike. You know, the evil, soulless vampire. He can't love anyone—especially me."

"He loved Drusilla."

"He was obsessed with Drusilla. It couldn't have been real love." Buffy let out a shaky breath. "Willow, when Angel became Angelus…"

"Buffy, Spike isn't Angel. Or Angelus."

Buffy looked startled. "Why are you defending him?"

"I'm not! And I'm not saying that if he is in love with you, you should love him back, because that would probably turn out really badly. But what I am saying is that maybe you should be a little nicer to him about all this. You have been sort of jerking the guy around, whether you've meant to or not."

"Be nicer to him? How can you say that? He's tried to kill me—tried to kill you, too."

"I understand that. What I don't understand is why you say that, but then keep, you know, doing things with him. No matter what you say, you know that Mauruk bite wore off a long time ago."

Buffy felt hot tears sting her eyes. "I don't know. I just…feel drawn to him. When he touches me, I can't control how much I want him. Oh god, Will, that first night was amazing. I wanted him so bad…"

"But that was because of the bite…"

"The first time," Buffy said, almost mumbling.

"First time?"

"We sorta, um, did it twice."

"Twice?"

Buffy blushed. "Uh huh. And now I want him constantly. That can't be natural…"

"Sure it is. It's like that at the beginning of a relationship, when it's all new. Oz and I…wow."

"But this isn't a relationship."

"Does Spike know that?"

"Huh?"

"Buffy, guys don't give lockets like that to their mortal enemies. They give them to their girlfriends."

"Oh god—you're right. Willow, what am I going to do?"

"You're going to have to be strong, Buffy. I know it's Spike, and he's all evil, but he still doesn't deserve to be jerked around."

"I know. I'll talk to him."

"Good." Willow patted Buffy's leg. "Now go enjoy your party."

"I'll try. But I'm not in much of a partying mood."

"Look on the bright side—it's your birthday, so I'm sure something catastrophic will happen any moment now and take your mind off everything."

"Gee, that makes me feel sooo much better. Thanks."

"Come on," Willow said, wrapping her arm around Buffy as they stood. "Let's go get some cake."

"Cake is good," Buffy agreed as she walked off with Willow.

*** *** ***

"Bloody Slayer," Spike muttered, walking through the cemetery back from his crypt. "You try to be nice to a girl, and all she can do is throw it back in your face that you've been evil for over a century." He stopped, noticing a demon a few feet away. Spike smiled a little. A good spot of violence was exactly what he needed right then.

"Well, what do I spy with my little eye?" Spike said, approaching the creature. "A demon. That would be…oh, right…the things I can kill."

The demon groaned. "Spike. Wonderful. A perfect end to a perfect day."

Spike froze. He knew that voice. Granted, it wasn't exactly speaking the language it usually did, but it was still unmistakable. And there was something familiar about the scent as well… "Giles?"

"Go on then. Let's get on with the fighting." Giles the demon paused. "You understand me?"

"Of course I understand you." Did all the "Scoobies" think he was a complete idiot? Spike decided not to ponder the answer to that question.

"I'm speaking English?"

"No, you're speaking Fyarl. I happen to speak Fyarl. And, by the way, why the hell are you suddenly a Fyarl demon. You just come over all demony this morning?" Spike walked over to a mausoleum, leaning against it and fishing a pack of cigarettes out of his duster.

"As a matter of fact, I did, thanks to Ethan Rayne. You have to help me find him. He must undo this, and then he needs a…good being killed."

Spike scoffed at that and took a drag off his cigarette. Why should he help Giles of all people? Out of the evilness of his heart? He started to tell Fyarl-Giles to bugger off when he thought of Buffy. She wouldn't like her Watcher being stuck forever as a demon. And what if those Initiative wankers grabbed Giles, not realizing who he was? Buffy would be devastated then. Spike felt his un-beating heart clench at the thought of Buffy being in that much pain. "So what's first? I run and tell the Slayer what you've gotten yourself into?"

"No. When I find Ethan I can clear all this up without Buffy ever having to find out that anything happened to me at all." Giles blinked. "Wait, you're helping me?"

"That's what you asked me to do, innit?"

"Well, yes, but I didn't expect you to agree so easily. I figured I'd have to threaten you—or at the very least offer you money."

Spike flicked his cigarette down into the cemetery grass. "Maybe I've reformed," he said with a cocky grin.

"Right. And I'm going to buy a tutu and join the Royal Ballet," Giles quipped.

"A Fyarl demon in a tutu is not a mental image I needed, thank you very much," Spike replied. "Come on, let's find this Ethan Whatsit and turn you back before my benevolent mood ends."

Giles nodded, walking with Spike out of the cemetery.

*** *** ***

"Are you sure I can't get you anything, Giles? I can brew you some tea…"

Giles gave his Slayer a pained smile. "Really, Buffy, I'm all right."

"Are you sure, cause…"

"Yes, I'm sure. And you don't have to feel guilty about stabbing me when I was a demon."

Buffy blushed a little. "I am sorry about that."

"It's quite all right. After all, you did think that I had, well…killed me. And you recognized me before it was too late."

"I'm glad I did," Buffy said, shivering a little. "I can't even begin to think of what I'd do if I ever lost you, Giles."

"You don't have to. I'm very much alive, although my pride is rather wounded. I'm not sure what embarrasses me more—the fact that I let Ethan get close enough to do that, or that I had to have Spike of all people help me."

Buffy blinked. "Wait, did you just say Spike helped you?"

"Yes. He helped me track down Ethan."

"What did he make you give him?" Buffy asked with a frown.

"Surprisingly nothing. He even agreed to let the Initiative chase him to distract them from me—knowing full well what would happen if they caught him."

"And…and he really didn't ask for anything in return?"

"No. Not a thing."

Buffy stood. "Giles, I have to go."

"Buffy, what…"

"I just have to go. I'll…I'll see you later." Buffy ran out of Giles's apartment, leaving him behind to frown in confusion.

*** *** ***

Spike tensed as he heard his crypt door fly open. "I'm not in the mood, Slayer."

"I'm not here for sex. I'm here for answers."

Spike looked at her, and Buffy was surprised at how tired he looked. "I'm not in the mood for any of it, Buffy. You've made it pretty clear how you feel about me, so why don't you just get out of my crypt?"

Buffy crossed her arms in front of her, making it clear she wasn't going anywhere. "Two things Spike—why'd you give me that locket, and why did you help Giles?"

"There's just no winning with you, is there, Slayer? I do something wrong and it's all 'oh, Spike's so evil, I hate him.' I do something nice, and it's 'Spike must be up to no good with that. I bet he's got some devious plan'"

"There is no 'doing nice' where you're concerned, Spike. You're incapable of it. Giles said you didn't make him do anything in return, but I doubt that. What did you get out of him?"

A flash of pain went over Spike's face before it hardened again. "I told you, nothing," he said through gritted teeth.

"Look, Spike, just tell me what you're playing at here. Helping Giles, being nice to me the other night, giving me that locket—what are you trying to do?"

"Look, Slayer, if you're here to beat some sort of evil scheme out of me, you're wasting your bleedin' time. I helped your Watcher because he needed it, I gave you the locket because it was your birthday, and as for the other night—you were there, too. You know why what happened happened."

Buffy blushed a little, hoping Spike wouldn't notice it. "Spike, you never act like this. I can't just…"

"What? Believe me? I really don't care if you do or not. I've had enough of you and your mood swings. So if you don't have anything else worthwhile to say, why don't you get the hell out of my crypt?"

"Who was Anne?" Buffy asked suddenly.

"Excuse me?"

"Anne. On the locket, the inscriptions didn't match. Who was she?"

Spike said nothing, just staring at her, his expression unreadable. Buffy had never seen him look quite that way before, and she felt a small twinge of nervousness. She decided that maybe leaving would be the best thing to do. She turned around, walking towards the door.

"She was my mother."

Buffy froze at the words so soft she almost wasn't sure she'd heard them. She reached up, grasping the locket she wore under her clothes. His mother? She hadn't been expecting that. "Spike…"

"Just go, Buffy."

Buffy walked away, the sound of the door closing reverberating through the tomb.

*** *** ***

Before anyone says it, I know Spike didn't have his crypt until after "A New Man." I'm changing things here, and, for the purposes of my story, it worked better for him to get the crypt earlier.

Feedback would be lovely.





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