A/N The song in this chapter is Broken by Seether, featuring Amy Lee


Later that day….

It had been a lovely afternoon with Dawn. They had met Giles for lunch, although hot dogs were not exactly his first choice, he had been so excited about seeing an old friend, Olivia, that he soon forgot exactly what it was he was eating.

Buffy and Dawn were excited to see him with a smile again and were only too glad to let he and his old friend go off to enjoy stuffy museums while they went shopping. It had been so long since they had had any sister time, and clothes shopping was just what the doctor ordered. They giggled as they discussed the hustle and bustle of the New Yorkers around them along with playing the “he is too beautiful to be straight” game, which of course brought up Spike.

Dawn assured Buffy that Spike was straight and more than a little affected by her presence. She also hinted that she should watch what she wore to dinner for fear that he would choke himself to death on a piece of sushi.

All in all they had a wonderful afternoon and loaded down with many bags they returned to the hotel. Buffy and Dawn went their separate ways at the elevator, Buffy needing to shower and get the red wash out of her hair before dinner tonight. Dawn needed to send some emails and promised Buffy she would come to her room before Spike was due to arrive.

Buffy went to her room, threw her bags on the bed and left a trail of clothes to the bathroom. She climbed under the warm spray of the shower and really felt herself relax for the first time in a while. She knew that Dawn was right; Xander would come around with no permanent damage to their friendship. So many changes were about to happen, they were finishing the tour, Xander was getting married, Dawn was going to college, everyone was living their lives, but where did that leave her? No, she was not going there, no feeling left behind, she was happy for them, and when this tour was over, she was going to look into getting one of those life things for herself. As her hands worked the soap over her body, she could not help but think that that life definitely needed to include a steady boyfriend. Shaking from the desire building in her just from the soap in her own hand, she shook from her thoughts and immediately finished rinsing her hair and body. Grateful for the perks that celebrity sometimes afforded, Buffy wrapped her hair and body in towels warmed by the hotel’s electric warming towel bars. She moved her bags and sat on the side of the bed to comb through her wet hair. Yawning, Buffy looked at the bedside clock and decided she had time to lie down for a few minutes before getting ready for dinner.

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Later still….

Buffy slowly awoke to a dark room. Startled, she realized two things, one, that she had been asleep too long and two, that she was not alone. Spike stood in the bedroom doorway, the light from the living room of the suite framing his body. Buffy was stunned; he looked like an angel with the light behind him. As she moved to sit up, the towel pulled loose and pooled around her waist. As her breasts were revealed, Spike sucked in a sharp breath. His eyes were raking her body and she could feel herself flushing. Buffy started to pull the towel up and Spike took a step towards her as one word desperately flew from his lips, “Don’t.”

Buffy’s eyes shot to his, he was still walking towards her and she was lost in those fathomless baby blues. Just then he reached the bed, grasped her shoulders and pulled her unresisting body to his. Their lips met in a passionate kiss, Spikes hands moved from her shoulders to either side of her face, deepening the kiss. Buffy pulled her lips away to get some much needed oxygen as his hands went back to her shoulders as his now free lips went to her throat.

“God Spike, God, I want you,” Buffy gasped. “want you so much!”

“Buffy, Buffy….”


“Buffy, Buffy, come on Buffy wake up. You need to get dressed,” Dawn yelled from her position at the end of the bed.

“What, huh?” Buffy slowly woke, ‘Oh God, only a dream.’

“Buffy-yyy,” Dawn was whining now. “It is six o’clock, if you don’t get up now and finish getting ready…” they both heard a knock at the door, “Spike is here already, get dressed.” With that, Dawn huffed out of the bedroom, closing the door behind her.

Buffy could hear muffled voices in the other room as she ran to her suitcase and pulled out underwear, jeans, and a top. As she pulled on her bra and panties she realized that she was still feeling the effects of the dream.

‘Great, now I have to go out and face him, when I all I really want to do is cuddle up to the hand held shower massager.’ After pulling on the rest of her clothes, she quickly dried and brushed her hair, threw on some moisturizer and lip-gloss and opened the bedroom door.

As Buffy emerged from her room, she saw that Spike and Dawn were standing by the magnificent view her suite offered taking in the sunset. They both turned her way and as Buffy met Spike’s eyes a blush broke out on her face and neck, “Sorry I’m late, I kinda fell asleep.”

Spike stepped towards her, confused by her blush, “That’s alright luv, you had a rough day.” ‘God, look at her, she’s just beautiful. Why does anyone ever make her up, she doesn’t need it.’

“Well, ready to go?” Dawn piped up. Two blonde heads shook yes in her direction and they were off.

***********************************************************************
9:00PM

All three were quiet in the cab from the restaurant to the hotel. Buffy was contemplating what she had learned about Spike during dinner:

He was 30, divorced, and lived here in New York. His father was dead, but his mother still lived in England. She was the person he was visiting when he was pulled for this assignment. He had started freelancing for Rayne magazine four years ago as a favor to a friend. He also did some freelance work for other magazines as well as dealt with “bleedin’ writer’s block” over a novel he had been trying to finish. Before the freelancing, he was a print reporter in London, assigned to the Middle East. While he and Dawn watched Buffy eat piece after piece of sushi, he had told them a few stories about some harrowing experiences he had had.

It sounded like it had been an exciting life and she wondered why he had given it up.

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Sitting next to Dawn, Spike was lost in thought about the elusive elder Ms. Giles. She had been very relaxed during dinner. Obviously, considering the amount of food she put away. Even joking when he asked where she put it all, saying she was going to throw it all up in a minute. Aside from the banter and a little information about the band’s tour, he had learned nothing else from her, outside of the peripheral information he had already learned from Dawn. He was just going to have to be more diligent.

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Dawn was smiling to herself about the two people on either side of her. They were perfect for each other. She knew they both had an attraction for the other, but she thought it could go deeper than that. Spike was so much better for Buffy than Riley, perfect brother material as far as she was concerned and woo-hoo, big time H.O.T. Maybe she could give them both a little push.

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The cab arrived at the hotel. Buffy and Dawn hopped out. “Hey Spike why don’t you come up, it is still early,” Dawn invited.

Spike looked to Buffy, “Is that ok with you pet?”

“Sure, we don’t have to be at the studio until 11 tomorrow,” she answered.

Spike paid the cabbie and followed the two girls into the hotel. As the doors of the elevator closed, Buffy turned to him, “So Spike, why the little names?”

“What do you mean?” he said.

“You know, luv, pet, princess,” she smiled up at him and batted her eyelashes, “can’t you remember my name?”

He smirked at her, “I could never forget your name.” Then getting a shy look on his face, “It has just been hard to keep Buffy from coming out of my mouth and I know that you prefer Liz now.”

She smiled, “Well since almost everyone you will be around for this week is going to call me Buffy, I guess you can too.”

“Ok, Buffy,” he whispered, causing a shiver to run down her spine.

At that moment, the elevator came to a stop at their floor and the doors opened. All three occupants emerged from the elevator to run into Xander walking down the corridor.

“Hey Xan,” Buffy ventured.

“Hey Buffy,” Xander greeted, looking slightly ashamed.

“Were you looking for me?” Buffy smiled.

“Yeah, I wanted to apologize for my outburst today,” he said, looking down at his feet. “I know it wasn’t you before. I know it wasn’t your fault.”

Buffy threw her arms around him and hugged him whispering, “I know Xan, I’m sorry too.”

“Why don’t we go inside,” she invited.

After the introduction had been made between Xander and Spike, they all went inside Buffy’s room.

“What you got in the bag Xan?” questioned Dawn.

Xander blushed, “Actually it is part peace offering and part bribe.” He handed the bag to Buffy.

Buffy squealed, “Oh, yummy Ben and Jerry’s Vanilla Caramel Fudge, my favorite.”

Spike chuckled, “You surely are not still hungry?”

“See, told you,” Dawn joined in.

Pouting out her lower lip, “Well, actually Mr. Smarty-pants, I am kind of full right now, so I am going to put it in the freezer for later, so I can eat it in peace. Why did you need a bribe?” she directed to Xander.

“Well I’m nervous about tomorrow and I was hoping we could do a quick run through tonight,” he gave her a pleading look.

“Sure Xan,” turning to Spike and Dawn, “you guys don’t mind do you? I’ll just get my guitar.”

Xander explained to Spike, “We are recording a duet of one of Buffy’s songs tomorrow, it is going to be on a soundtrack for some super hero movie. We have been doing the song in concert for a while, but it is always just Buffy and her guitar. The producers wanted a duet with an orchestra, so Buffy agreed on the condition that I sang the duet with her. Tomorrow will be the first time I have ever sung anything other than back-up….”

“And you will do fine,” Buffy came back with her guitar and sat on a bench, patting the chair next to her. Xander took the chair, while Spike and Dawn sat on the sofa. “Ready,” she said.

“Ready,” Xander replied as Buffy started to play.

Xander: I wanted you to know I love the way you laugh
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away
I keep your photograph I know it serves me well
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain



Together : 'Cause I'm broken when I'm open
and I don't feel like I am strong enough
'Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
and I don't feel light when you're gone away

You’ve gone away, you don’t feel me anymore


Buffy: The worst is over now and we can breathe again
I wanna hold u high and steal my pain
there's so much left to learn & no one left to fight
I wanna hold u high & steal your pain



Together: 'Cause I’m broken when I’m open
and I don’t feel like I am strong enough
'Cause I’m broken when I’m lonesome
and I don’t feel right when you're gone away



Dawn got up from the sofa and Spike followed her. “What’s wrong?” he asked.

“Nothing,” Dawn replied wistfully, “it’s just hard hearing that song sometimes.”

“Why?”

“Buffy started writing it when our mom was sick and then finished it after she died,” Dawn explained. “Sometimes I think she is very lucky being able to express all of her feelings in song, to create something so beautiful out of such misery. You know that is what she does, every feeling she can’t or won’t say in words, she says in her music. I wonder if it is cathartic for her.”

Spike turned to gaze once again at this intriguing woman. He was surprised by Dawn’s revelation. Maybe this was the key to figuring Buffy out.


'Cause I’m broken
when I’m open
and I don’t feel like I am strong enough
'Cause I’m broken when I’m lonesome
and I don’t feel light when you're gone away


'Cause I’m broken when I’m lonesome
and I don’t feel light when you're gone away

Gone away you don’t feel me anymore

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10:30PM…


Xander had left to go back to Anya about half an hour before. Dawn deciding to force Buffy and Spike to be alone together, made an excuse to leave as well.

They had been sitting together on the sofa talking about the schedule tomorrow.

“So, I guess I should be heading out,” Spike started.

“Yeah, I should be getting to bed,” Buffy rose from the couch. “Thanks again for dinner, I had a really nice time, kind of forgot that you just were not part of the gang.”

“So did I,” he replied. “Buffy, I really do not want to push you into telling me anything you are not comfortable with. I do respect your privacy. I’m not sure about what happened with the press and your last relationship, but I have a good idea and I want to assure you that I am not like that, I won’t hurt you.”

Buffy was surprised by his outburst, “I will try to open up a little more. I have committed to do this and I won’t let you down.”

Spike gave her a big smile, “I will see you at the studio then.”
Buffy opened the door and Spike stepped into the hallway, said good night and started walking away.

“Spike, wait,” Buffy called after him. “If you want to, you could come and have breakfast with us in the morning?”

She did not think his smile could get any brighter, “I would love to Buffy. What time?”

“'Bout 9?” she replied.

“9 sounds perfect. Sweet dreams luv,” he said backing down the hall.

Buffy closed the door and leaned heavily against it, “Oh yeah, I’m sure they will be sweet,” she said aloud as she walked to the bedroom.


**Sorry about that little tease, but I was getting a little nuts without any smoochies : )





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