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Chapter 16 – Forever


Sitting in the lobby of the hotel in the pre-dawn hours, Buffy watched through the windows as the sky began to lighten. Spike had let the subject drop when they went up to her room, quickly falling asleep with his arms wrapped tightly around her. After staying awake and listening to the comforting sounds of his breathing and heartbeat, she had further cemented her decision to leave well enough alone. She didn’t want to be the one to take that away from him. He deserved to live a normal life, or at least as normal as a Slayer could have.

After an hour, Buffy had gotten up to go sit in the lobby. Moving away from the window, she went to sit on a couch, curling her legs up to her chest and resting her chin on her knees.

She felt lost.

And the loneliness that was surrounding her before, felt like it was smothering her now.

Knowing that Spike was willing to give up everything to be with her, but she couldn’t take it, made the lifetimes she would have to live, after he was gone, even more lonely and full of despair.

“Buffy?”

Looking up with sad eyes, she didn’t say anything when she saw Angel standing in front of her.

“What’s wrong?”

Shaking her head in response, she slowly lowered her chin back to her knees, letting her shoulders sag.

“Is it Spike?”

“He wants me to turn him, Angel,” she said quietly, almost to herself.

Standing in shock for a few moments, Angel slowly sat down next to her. “He told you, straight out?”

“Yeah,” her voice barely above a whisper.

“What did you say?”

“I told him I wouldn’t. I can’t kill him,” she said softly, her voice a choked whisper.

Angel nodded. “And did he agree?”

“He dropped the subject, but I don’t think the conversation’s over.”

“That’s a big sacrifice, Buffy.”

“You think I don’t know that?” she asked, her eyes snapping over to his.

“I never said that. How do you feel about it? I mean, really feel?”

“I wanted to,” she whispered softly, never looking away from him as the tears filled her eyes. “I want him. I don’t want to be alone forever…but that’s just me being selfish.”

“That’s not selfish, Buffy. You love him, and I know how you feel. I feel the same about Cordy, but your decision is more difficult because he would keep his soul.” Angel paused to wrap a comforting arm around the small girl. “And you won’t be alone. I’ll be here for you.”

Managing a weak smile, Buffy slowly turned toward the staircase when she heard a noise, surprised to look directly into Spike’s infuriated blue gaze. Standing up and making her way over to him, she wrapped her arms around his lean waist, resting her head against the strong muscles of his chest.

“What’re you doing up, baby?” she asked quietly.

Never taking his eyes off of Angel as he spoke, “I was going to ask you the same thing. You weren’t in bed…got worried about you.”

“I’m fine. Let’s go back to bed.”

“You go on. I’ll be there in a minute,” he said, turning his gaze to Buffy when she looked up at him with a worried look in her eyes. Silencing her fears by kissing her tenderly on the forehead, her gently cupped her cheek in his hand. “Go on, love. I just need some water.”

Hesitantly nodding, she made her way up the stairs. When she was out of sight, Spike turned on Angel. “Don’t think I don’t know what you’re doing, Peaches.”

Angel’s gaze turned livid as he stared at the Slayer. “And what would that be, boy?”

Taking a few steps closer to him, Spike narrowed his eyes. “You have your fun now with the new girl. In a few years when she’s gone, you'll turn back to your first love because she’ll always be here.”

Clenching his jaw tightly, Angel restrained himself from slamming his fist into the younger man’s face. “Watch your mouth, boy. I love Cordelia, and I would never use her that way just to go back to Buffy.”

“I have no doubt you love her, mate. But an eternity is a long time to be alone. Might as well strengthen those bridges while they're around instead of burning them, eh?”

“You have no idea what you’re talking about,” Angel said, pushing past Spike.

“No?” he asked, turning to face him again. “So you’re not still in love with Buffy?”

Turning and staring at him for a few moments, Angel finally nodded. “I love her…but not in the way you think.” Without another word, he walked out of the lobby, leaving Spike to stand and reflect over what he’d said.

“Spike?”

Turning at the sound of the soft voice from the stairs, he felt himself relax when he saw Buffy standing there. “Yeah, pet?”

“Is something wrong?” she asked, her eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

“No,” he said, shaking his head and walking toward her. “Nothing’s wrong. Let’s go to bed.”

Smiling when he guided her back to their room and shut the door, she relaxed as she watched him lean against it.

Admiring the woman in front of him for a moment, he smiled when she finally looked down at the floor in embarrassment. “What?” she asked with a soft smile.

“You.”

“Me?”

Pushing away from the door, he wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her closer as he buried his face in her hair. “Just watching you…I missed you, baby.”

“I know…I missed you, too.”

“You didn’t have to leave,” he said, pulling back to look at her. “I came back. I probably would have caught you if I hadn’t stopped to buy those soddin’ flowers.”

Buffy’s face immediately brightened. “You bought me flowers?”

“Like the bloody ponce that I am. I knew I had to do something to make it up to you.”

“What kind?”

“What? Oh, roses…I think.”

“You think?” she asked with a smile.

“I’ve been a little preoccupied with trying to find you, baby. I don’t really remember what I bought for you a week ago.” Buffy pouted, causing Spike to smile. “You know I can’t resist that lip.”

Buffy didn’t respond, just jutted her lip out even further, until Spike pressed a gentle kiss to her lips. Moaning when the kiss slowly became more passionate, she allowed him to lead her over to the bed, trembling when he slowly began undressing her. Once her clothing was a pile on the
floor, Spike lovingly picked her up and placed her on the bed before shedding his sweatpants and crawling on top of her.

More than a little surprised by the tenderness of his actions, Buffy wasn’t sure what to expect. Their lovemaking had always been raw and passionate- Spike had never treated her to this mellow, slower pace that he was currently using as he kissed his way down her body. Suddenly becoming more nervous when he began lavishing kisses against her thigh, slowly trailing upward, Buffy tensed, biting her lip as she stopped his movements.

“Wh-what…what are you doing?” she asked, her voice thick with tension.

Looking up into her eyes, Spike raised an eyebrow. “Surely you know what I’m doing, love.”

Buffy nodded nervously. “It’s just…I’ve never…”

Spike smiled in understanding. ‘So,’ he thought. ‘The great poofter never did this.’

“Relax, baby,” he whispered huskily. “You’ll love it.”

Before Buffy had a chance to react, she felt his tongue slide along her opening and arched off the bed when the jolt of pleasure hit her body. Spike smiled, enjoying the reaction he was rewarded as he continued his ministrations.

Feeling his tongue softly trailed almost lazily over her sensitive flesh. Moaning when he nipped lightly at her clit, Buffy felt her fingers winding through his soft hair, urging him to continue
as a tingling sensation began in her stomach. His tongue bathed over her vulnerable bundle of nerves before latching on and sucking hard.

Buffy’s hands abandoned his hair as she grabbed the covers to each side of her and arched into his face with a shuddering scream of climax.

Holding her hips, Spike continued to draw out her maximum pleasure as Buffy began squirming when the feeling became too much for her. Letting her go to crawl up her body and look down at her, he offered her a tender smile when she looked up at him with an exhausted gaze. Lowering his lips to hers, Spike kissed her passionately, smiling against her lips when she began to grow even more excited as she tasted herself on his tongue.

Gasping when she felt his hardened length pressing against her, she arched toward him, letting her fingernails dig into his shoulders, her muscles clenching around him when he slowly entered her.

Meeting her lips in another searing kiss, he began rocking slowly against her, smiling when he felt Buffy try and speed up the thrusts only to groan in frustration when he continued at the same pace.

“Just relax, baby. This is all for you,” he whispered, looking deep into her eyes. Spike continued to move his hips as their hands entwined, relishing the feel of the woman beneath him as they fell into the rhythm of their bodies moving as one.

Watching as Buffy’s body began to shake with another impending climax that he was causing, Spike sped up, plunging into her with more force, watching as she involuntarily squeezed her eyes shut. Her body began to quake as it shook with a powerful orgasm, gasping a second before her inner muscles began clenching around his cock as Spike continued his thrusts.

“Spike!”

Feeling his body trembling as her nails dragged along the length of his back before spilling himself deep within her. Collapsing next to her on the bed, Spike pulled her to him and kissed her lightly on the top of her head.

“I love you, baby,” he whispered hoarsely.

“I love you, too.”

Watching as Buffy fell into an exhausted sleep a few minutes later, he pulled her even closer to him. “Forever,” he whispered.





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