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Chapter 14


Spike paced his office for hours, unsure of what to do. He felt
certain what he had done to Buffy was unforgivable. He knew how devastated he would feel if the situation had been reversed. He still wasn’t sure he was
good enough for her, but he knew he had to be with her.

As Spike looked up, he noticed the sun was already shining. He grabbed
his keys and left the office, slamming the door behind him.

* * * * *

Buffy and Cordy woke up early the next morning, even though they had
stayed up late the night before. Each in their bikinis, they made their way to
the indoor pool. When Buffy walked in, she was in awe of the area. Three
glass walls and a glass ceiling expanded from the back of the house to
enclose the pool area and give a spectacular view of the grounds. The large pool took up the majority of the room, with a hot tub in the back corner,
furthest away from the house. It was above ground to offer more privacy, and
there were tropical plants and small trees spanning the length of the room.

“Cordy, this is amazing,” she said in admiration.

“Thanks,” Cordelia said, tossing her towel down onto a nearby chair.
“I added it on when I bought the house. I always wanted a pool, so I
figured, why not?”

A few moments after Cordy dove into the pool and resurfaced, the doorbell chimed throughout the house. “Damn,” she said. “Buffy, do you mind
seeing who that is?”

“Sure,” Buffy said, grabbing an oversized button-down shirt off a
chair and pulling it on. She didn’t bother to button it, but instead wrapped it
around her body and headed for the door. When she got to the front door and
flung it open, both people stood staring at each other in shock.

“Buffy,” Spike said. “What are you doing here?”

Buffy swallowed hard at seeing Spike standing in front of her. “Cordy
invited me over. I-I’ll just…go…”

Buffy turned to get her friend when she felt Spike’s hand on her arm.
Turning to face him, the front of her shirt opened, leaving Spike
practically drooling at the view he was offered.

Noticing the direction his eyes were going, Buffy self-consciously pulled the fabric back together. Before she knew what was happening, Spike’s mouth
was on hers, kissing her almost brutally as his hands slid beneath her shirt
to clutch at the bare skin of her back.

Buffy felt light-headed as Spike deepened the kiss, slipping his tongue
into her mouth to tangle with her own. Her hands came up to grip his
shoulders for balance as Spike lifted her into his arms. Pushing her against the
wall, Buffy’s legs reflexively went around his waist as one of his hands
slid up to her shoulder, pushing the shirt away from her skin. Buffy moaned
into his mouth as his hand slid downward to cup her breast and squeeze
gently against the skimpy fabric of her bathing suit.

Breaking away for air after a few minutes, Buffy pulled back and looked into
Spike’s lust-filled eyes. Suddenly realizing what was happening, Buffy
straightened her legs to the floor and gently pushed at his chest until he
backed away slightly.

“Buffy, I-“

“No,” she said softly, shaking her head. “It’s okay…it’s just as much my
fault, so don’t worry about it. I’ll get Cordy for you.” She quickly turned
and made her way through the house.

“Buffy!”

“Spike, don’t,” she cried, spinning around to face him. “It’s too hard. I know you don’t want me the way I want you. I don’t hold it against you…you can’t control who you love.”

Spike watched speechlessly as she turned and disappeared through a
doorway. A few minutes later, his sister emerged. “What’s up, Spike?”

Spike snapped out of his train of thought as he saw Cordy. “Actually,
Cordelia, I don’t think I need to talk anymore.”

“Spike, are you alright?”

“Fine…its just, I have a lot on my mind.”

“Okay, if you’re sure.”

“Yeah,” he said, nodding slightly, as he turned for the door.

“Spike?”

Spike turned as Cordy called his name.

“You should talk to her.”

“I’ve tried.”

“No…talk to her. Get everything out in the open and really talk to her.”

“I’ll try,” Spike said with a nod.





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