Spike woke to something tiny nibbling his foot. He muttered, pulling his leg up. He started to drift back to sleep when his foot was bitten again, this time harder, and with tiny claws involved. He jolted awake, crying out.

Buffy opened her eyes. "What's wrong?" she asked, still mostly asleep.

Spike glanced at the little ball of black and white fur staring up at him from the end of the bed. "Larry bit me."

Buffy looked down. "That's Pete," she said before getting resituated on the pillow, her eyes drifting shut again. "Besides, vampire getting bitten—sorta karma."

"Watch that mouth, missy."

Buffy smiled, her eyes still closed. "Or what?"

Spike wasn't sure why he did what he did next. Before the rational part of his brain kicked in and told him he was doing something beyond stupid, his lips were on hers. Buffy's eyes popped open, and after the initial shock, she was kissing back.

Suddenly, Spike pulled away, remembering why he couldn't be doing this. "Buffy, I'm sorry. We…"

Buffy didn't let him finish. She wrapped her fingers around the curls at the nape of his neck, pulling his mouth to hers again. Spike closed his eyes and gave him, the taste and smell of Buffy almost overwhelming him. After a few moments, they broke apart, both panting.

Buffy ran her fingers down his cheek. "Do you even need to breathe?"

"Only when you're around."

"Ironic, 'cause it always seems like you take my breath away."

The look in Buffy's eyes hurt Spike more than any physical blow she'd ever delivered. Her gaze held nothing but warmth and trust, but he knew it was only because of a spell—just like the engagement spell that had wreaked havoc on his emotions years before. What she felt for him now, it wasn't real, and it would go away as soon as she was herself again.

"We should get out of bed, Buffy."

"Why? I'm sure it's still morning. Isn't that when vampires are supposed to be in bed?"

"Yes, but… You should go find the others, see if they have any ideas on getting your memories back."

"I don't want to bee with them. I want to be with you. I thought we covered this last night."

"I know, but you should at least check in with them."

"I'd rather keep kissing you."

Buffy pouted. "But don't you like kissing me, Spike?"

"Little girl, you have no idea. But that's not the point…"

Buffy pushed up against him, bracing her hands against his chest. "I liked kissing you. Really, really liked kissing you." She lowered her eyelashes seductively.

Spike growled, crushing his mouth to hers again. He ran his hand down her side, stroking her hip with his fingers for a moment before taking hold of her rear and pushing her against the bulge that was forming in the front of his jeans. Buffy whimpered and rubbed up against him, and Spike forgot to care that if he kept going, non-amnesiac Buffy would stake him. Sure, he'd be dust, but at least he'd die a happy man…

Spike was just about to roll Buffy over and have his wicked way with her when once again teeth clamped around his toe. "Bloody hell, Pete!"

"Actually, that time it was Larry."

Spike closed his eyes for a moment, calming himself. He brushed Buffy's hair away from her face. "We shouldn't be doing this, pet."

"Why? Don't…don't you want me?"

"Of course I do, but it's not right, Buffy. You're not…you're not you right now."

Buffy looked hurt for just a moment before her eyes hardened, and she got out of bed. She gathered her clothes back up angrily and headed for the ladder. Spike jumped up, running to her and grabbing her arm. "Where are you going, Buffy?"

"Don't touch me!" Buffy snapped, wrenching her arm away from him. "Don't ever touch me again!"

Spike blinked. "Did you just get your memory back?"

"Oh, you'd like that, wouldn't you?"

"What? Buffy, what is this?"

"You love her—not me!"

"Huh? Who are you talking about?"

"The other Buffy! The Buffy with the memories! She's the one you want!"

"Bugger," Spike muttered. This is just what he needed in his unlife, Buffy throwing a jealous fit over his feelings for, well, Buffy. "Look, that's not true. I don't love you for your memories. I love you for you, and you're still, um, you."

"But you said this couldn't happen because I'm not me."

"That's not what I meant."

"It's what you said!"

"Pet, what I meant by that was, well, you're fifteen years old…"

"My body isn't."

Spike's jaw clenched as he tried to force his own body not to respond to that statement. "I know, but you don't understand how much Buffy with memories hates me."

"If she hates you, then why did she tell you about being in Heaven and not her other friends, huh?"

"What difference does it make tellin' me? Whisper your secrets to a dead man, doesn't mean anything."

"Maybe you're just discounting what you mean to her. Maybe memoryful Buffy does like you back."

"No! Don't you understand? Even if she did feel something for me, she'd never act on it, not the way you're doing! If I do anything with you, she'll kill me. And I don't mean that figuratively. I mean it in the sense of any more hanky panky, and it's a stake through the heart for old Spike. I may have pushed it too far already."

"She wouldn't. I wouldn't."

"Buffy…"

"Spike, I have feelings for you. Strong feelings. And I don't know a lot about falling in love, but I don't think what I feel for you is something that could just pop up overnight. I feel like it was there before, like maybe…maybe my heart didn't forget."

"Please don't say that, Buffy. It's too good. I can't…I can't let myself think…"

Buffy launched herself at Spike, wrapping her legs around his waist and her arms around his neck. As soon as her lips touched his, Spike kissed back, turning them around so he had Buffy against the wall. Buffy broke away, moaning as Spike's cool hands traveled under the shirt she was wearing.

"Please," Buffy whimpered. "I need you. It feels…it feels like my body's always wanted this. Been waiting…"

"Buffy…pet…need you so bad, baby."

"Buffy? Spike? Are either one of you here?"

"Bloody hell," Spike grumbled, letting Buffy slip to the ground.

"Maybe if we hide, she'll go away."

Spike shook his head. "Not Dawn. She's…persistent."

"Spike, it's really bright outside, so I know at least you're here."

"See?" Spike said, nodding towards the trapdoor. "Put your pants on and go see what your sister wants."

Buffy pouted. "But I don't wanna put my pants on."

"Buffy, please. You don't want Dawn to find us like this."

"Fine," Buffy grumbled. She put on her jeans, then told Spike with a wink, "You're taking these off later." She climbed up the ladder before he could respond.

"Buffy! There you are!" Dawn said when Buffy appeared through the trapdoor. "What were you doing down there?"

"Um, sleeping?"

Dawn took in Buffy's rumpled clothes—Spike's shirt no less—her tousled hair, and flushed cheeks. "Uh huh. You were making out with Spike!"

"I was not!" Dawn crossed her arms in front of her and raised an eyebrow, and Buffy sighed. "Okay, maybe a little."

"Apparently age really doesn't bring more common sense," Dawn said. "I always figured you should've jumped Spike's sexy, undead bones ages ago."

"Why didn't I exactly? Cause damn, major hottie there."

"Because he's evil or something. But it's a totally lame excuse because Spike adores you. This summer, when…" Dawn trailed off.

"It's okay, Dawn. I know I was dead. Kinda freaky, but it's not like I remember it."

"Oh. Well, um, while you were gone, Spike took care of me. He promised you the night you left that he would, and he was determined to keep it. It was really sweet and romantic. Like his love was so strong it didn't die with you." Dawn leaned in conspiratorially. "He hates it when I say this, but I don't think he's all that evil anymore."

"He doesn't seem evil to me. You should see him with the kittens. It's so cute."

"Oi! Vampire hearing! Not cute!"

Dawn and Buffy both looked embarrassed for a moment when they realized Spike had probably heard most of their conversation, but they quickly started laughing. "There are kittens?" Dawn asked.

"Yeah. Apparently Spike and his friends use them to play poker."

"Spike!" Dawn yelled. "That's horrible! Poor kittens!"

"Vampire, nibblet! Evil vampire!"

Dawn rolled her eyes. "Don't listen to him. He has delusions of still being the Big Bad."

Buffy giggled. "Well, from what I felt this morning, the big part certainly isn't a delusion."

Dawn giggled, too. This is what she'd always wanted, a sister who would share secrets and talk about boys and stuff. Not a sister who thought she was too young to do anything. "So where are these kittens?"

The trapdoor opened and each of the kittens were placed on the ground one by one. "Thank you, Spike!" Buffy called before he shut the door again.

"Aw! They're adorable!" Dawn said, picking one up. "What are their names?"

"You're holding Frank. And that's Pete, and Larry."

Dawn giggled. "Good names."

"Thanks. So did you stop by for a social visit, or…"

"Oh, right. Sorta thrown for a loop with the whole you macking on Spike thing." Dawn scratched Frank behind his left ear. "The Scoobies have gathered to once again try to fix your problem, and they want you to come back to the Magic Box."

"The what?"

"The Scoobies. It's a sort of nickname for your slaying buddies. Short for the Scooby Gang. You know, like the people on Scooby Doo, with the monster hunting and all."

"Guess it beats them referring to themselves as 'Those Guys in the Van…'"

"Lame, I know, but I had nothing to do with it. So are you coming?"

"I don't want to…" Buffy said, glancing down to where she knew Spike was.

"I don't blame you for that," Dawn said. "But if I show up and tell them you can't come because you're playing tonsil hockey with Spike…"

"Good point. It would probably make Xander explode." Buffy smirked. "On second thought…"

Dawn snickered. "Hey, maybe this time they'll actually find something quick and useful."

"I doubt it. Did you see them yesterday before they mercifully allowed you to leave? Anya was looking at floral arrangements, Xander kept going on donut runs, and Willow spent more time apologizing for casting the damn spell than actually doing anything to fix it."

"Yeah, that's pretty much the norm around here. At times I'm shocked more of them haven't died. Or at least lost some limbs. Maybe an eye."

Buffy sighed. "Just let me put on my other shirt so I look a little less suspicious, and we can go."

"Yeah, the too-big black t-shirt does sorta scream 'raided Spike's wardrobe.'"

Buffy opened the trapdoor, but before she could say anything, her shirt flew up, hitting her in the face. "Um, thanks," she called down. "I'll be back later, okay?"

"Whatever, Slayer."

Buffy frowned. Maybe she was imagining things, but Spike sounded a lot colder than he had been earlier. Had she done something wrong? Dawn turned around letting Buffy change her shirt. Then, Buffy went over by the television where she'd left her shoes and socks, quickly putting them on. She went back to the trapdoor, calling down, "Don't forget about the kittens. Clem brought them food, too, and it's…"

"I know where it is, Slayer."

"Um, okay. I'll be back, I promise."

Spike didn't respond. Buffy sighed, turning back to Dawn. "Let's go."

*** *** ***

Spike sat on the end of his bed. He knew he should be happy to think about this morning with Buffy, but he wasn't. He'd meant it when he'd told her she was still basically Buffy, even without the memories, and that he loved her, but that didn't change the fact that she didn't really love him. Touching her this morning, hearing her talk to Dawn like he wasn't something to be ashamed of—it was more than he could've ever hoped for.

But it wasn't real. She'd get her memories back, and even if what she was feeling was real, she'd push it down, telling herself that the Slayer could never love a soulless vampire.

Spike heard a tiny meow and looked down. "I know how she tells you three apart," he told the kitten. "Just a bunch of bloody balls of fur to me."

The kitten gave a pitiful mew, and Spike sighed, picking him up. The kitten purred and rubbed against Spike's hand.

"I am the Big Bad, y'know," Spike said, scratching the side of the kitten's face. "Not supposed to be getting all emotional over the bloody Slayer. Guess it's a bit late for that though, innit?"

The kitten's only response was a loud purr.

*** *** ***

Buffy chewed a piece of bubble gum. Loudly. "This majorly sucks," she announced to the group in the Magic Box. They all looked up at her. "Well, it does."

Giles took off his glasses and cleaned them, making Buffy roll his eyes. Was he obsessive-compulsive with those things or something? "Buffy, we're trying to help you."

"With what, magic donuts and bridal magazines? Whatever." She popped her gum. "I'm outta here."

"Buffy, really, you need to…"

"Go to the mall," Buffy said, finishing Giles's sentence the way she thought it should end. "Dawn, you wanna come with?"

Dawn saw the looks she was getting from Giles and Xander, but she didn't care. It's not like they were letting her do any real research anyway. "Sure. Someone has to show you where it is after all."

"Dawn, this isn't…"

"Bye, Xander!" Dawn announced, running out of the Magic Box with her sister.

"Should one of us maybe go keep an eye on them?" Tara asked.

No one answered.

*** *** ***

"The malls in L.A. are sooo much better than this one," Buffy said, surveying the Sunnydale Galleria.

"Tell me about it. But a crappy mall is better than no mall."

"Some of the time." Buffy bit her bottom lip. "I want to buy something for Spike."

Dawn arched her eyebrow. "Like what?"

"I don't know. Got any suggestions?"

"Edible underwear?"

Buffy giggled, playfully slapping Dawn's arm. "No. Pervert. Something sweet."

"Edible underwear can be sweet. Or so I've heard anyway…"

"Not yummy sweet. Romantic sweet. He thinks I only love him because of the whole amnesia thing, and I want him to know that isn't true."

"Oh my god! You love Spike?"

Buffy blushed. "Maybe. I don't know. But I think maybe I do."

Dawn squealed, jumping a few times before hugging her sister. "This is awesome. You and Spike will make such the coolest couple."

"I know. I just need to convince him of that. You said you hung with him all summer. You have to help me."

"Got it. And we're going for sweet, not kinky?"

"Yep. Although if I have things my way, kinky'll come later."

Dawn giggled. "This is so great. Come on, let's go find something Spike will love."

*** *** ***

Dawn had been wandering the mall with Buffy for close to three hours. She seemed to find something wrong with everything they saw, but assured Dawn she'd know what to buy when she saw it.

"How about that shirt," Dawn asked as the walked past the men's department in Macy's. "The blue would really bring out his eyes."

Buffy shook her head. "I already said I didn't want to encourage the wearing of clothes."

"Right. I forgot." Dawn couldn't remember a time when Buffy had been so indecisive. Granted, most of the decisions she saw Buffy make consisted of things like which sword to use to decapitate a demon, but still…

Suddenly, Buffy stopped short, causing Dawn to almost bump into her. "Buffy, watch it."

"There," Buffy said, pointing to a jewelry case. "That's it."

Dawn followed the line of Buffy's finger to a silver men's ring with a dark red stone in the middle. "It is really nice, but, um, price?"

Buffy pulled out a wad of bills from her pocket. "Shouldn't be a problem."

Dawn gaped. "Where did you get that?"

Buffy shrugged. "I overheard Xander complaining on his cellphone to one of his work buddies about how Anya was driving him insane with all the wedding stuff, and he was half-tempted to suggest the bride's maids where giant bunny costumes just to shut her up. I offered my silence in return for monetary compensation."

"You blackmailed Xander?"

"Well, yeah."

Dawn hugged her. "You are like the coolest amnesiac sister ever."

"I know, aren't I though?"

The sales clerk came up to Dawn and Buffy. "Can I help you?"

"Yes," Buffy said. "I'd like to look at that ring please."

The woman didn't flinch or give Buffy a "yeah right, you kid" look. Buffy decided there were some perks to not being a teenager—at least on the outside. Dawn leaned over Buffy's shoulder as the woman placed the ring on the counter.

"Do you think it'll fit him?" Dawn asked. "I never asked his ring size…"

Buffy frowned for a second, thinking. Her eyes lit up when she saw a man a few feet away. She grabbed his hand. He made a sound of protest, but Buffy ignored him. "What do you think, Dawn—about Spike's size?"

"Pretty close," Dawn agreed.

"Sir, could you maybe try this ring on? It's for my boyfriend, and I don't know his ring size…" Buffy bit her lip, give her most pitiful look.

The man smiled, forgetting how irritated he had been a few seconds before. "Sure." He slipped the ring on.

Buffy grabbed his hand again, turning it over a few times. "It fits. Looks good on, too." She nodded to the sales clerk. "We'll take it."

Buffy smiled as the sales clerk rang her up. She knew she could convince Spike of her feelings, and then they could be happy, amnesia or no amnesia.

*** *** ***

Posts two days in a row. Do I rock or what? However, there probably won't be a post for a couple of days at least since, due to my extreme laziness, I'm still registered to vote at my parents' address even though I moved out four years ago. So anyway, I have to go there tomorrow night, and that will impede on my fanfic writing ability. But I'll try to get the next chapter up as soon as I can!

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