A/N Okay, this was the chapter that my writer’s block developed. It’s over, for the moment, but I decided to fast-forward, skipping ahead about a month. I’m sorry to anyone who wanted the first date, but I hope this chapter will make it up to you. It’s a very Spuffy-centric update, and I refrained from any cliffhangers, but the drama/angst isn’t over, yet, so please come back to read more! Thank you for all of the wonderful reviews!


Chapter 13 - Feelings


“Spike…” Buffy giggled as his lips attacked her neck. “I thought you came
over to study.”

“Me, too,” he murmured, letting his hands trail up her body as his mouth
continued its assault. “I just can’t help myself.”

Buffy finally relented, laying back on her bed as his hands massaged her
lower back. The two had been dating for over a month, and every time they
got a moment alone, this was the end result. Not that Buffy was
complaining, but it was becoming more and more obvious that they might fail
their English project.

“Spike,” she whispered, her voice taking on a needy quality as her hands
threaded through his hair.

Spike pulled back, looking at her for a moment, before sealing his lips to
hers in a tender kiss.

The past two weeks, Buffy’s father had gone out of town on business, and
Spike was relieved that they didn’t have to worry about him. Now, as he lay
on top of his girlfriend, he felt his hips lightly rotate against hers,
almost testing her reaction. Spike’s eyes rolled back when her body arched
against his, making him grow almost painfully hard with her movement.

“Spike,” she whispered as he pulled back to look into her emerald eyes. He
frowned when he saw her worrying her bottom lip with her teeth.

“What is it, luv?” he whispered as he tenderly brushed the hair away from
her face.

“Can we…go farther?” she asked in a timid voice, averting her eyes.

Spike swallowed hard as his eyes widened, not sure if he heard the right
request. “Buffy…are you sure?”

“I am,” she whispered, raising her eyes to his as she nodded.

Spike watched as she gently pushed against his chest so she could sit up
before removing her shirt completely. He felt his mouth go dry at the
golden skin that was exposed, reaching out to lightly run a hand over her
bare shoulder and down her arm.

Any words that he might have articulated were silenced as Buffy’s lips slid
across his. Buffy moaned as Spike’s fingers interlaced through her hair,
pulling her even closer to him as the kiss deepened.

After a few minutes, Buffy broke away from him breathlessly as she flipped
them over, straddling his waist. Spike looked up at her, giving her a soft
smile as she slowly leaned forward, unhurriedly touching her lips to his.
Her tongue gently brushed his bottom lip, asking for entrance, as Spike felt
his eyes roll back at her tenderness.

His mouth opened for her as his hands gripped her hips, trying to control
his emotions as she lightly pushed against him. Buffy gasped when she felt
them rolling over once again before moaning as his hand traveled up her
stomach to graze the tender skin underneath her bra. Buffy squirmed around
underneath him for a moment as she released the clasp on her bra, letting
it fall to the floor.

Spike felt his breath catch as he stared at her exposed breasts, gently
running his hand along the side of one before letting his thumb lightly
tease one nipple. Buffy tried to keep her breathing as steady as possible
as they looked into each other’s eyes.

“Are you sure?” Spike asked again, his hands traveling lower until they rested on
the waistband of her pants. Buffy didn’t answer as she pulled him into
another kiss. As the kiss intensified, she could feel his hands moving,
slowly stripping her of her clothes before sitting up and practically
ripping off his shirt. She watched nervously as he looked back at her
before unhurriedly sliding his jeans down his legs. Buffy could barely
comprehend that he wasn’t wearing anything under his jeans as she looked at
his hardened length, her eyes widening at the size.

Buffy felt her face flush as he crawled up the length of her body before
she was lying beneath him, completely naked. Spike smiled at the delicate
blush as he ran his hands over her skin, putting her at ease. His lips met
hers in another kiss as one of his hands lightly palmed her breast.

“Wait,” Buffy said breathlessly, smiling when Spike immediately jumped away
from her as if he’d been burned. “Not that kind of ‘wait’,” Buffy said,
rolling over slightly to rummage through her nightstand, extracting a condom
a moment later.

Spike took it from her with a raised eyebrow as he looked from it to her.
“Buffy…didn’t I see some birth control pills in your bathroom?”

“Yes,” Buffy said quietly as she watched him. “This is for you, because…I
thought you might be more comfortable if you had…”

“So, this is for my benefit?” he asked skeptically as Buffy nodded.

“I thought…”

“Answer me,” he said gently.

“Yes.”

“Let’s get one thing straight, luv. You trust me, right?”

“Of course,” Buffy replied, her eyes widening.

“You know I got tested to make sure you stay safe whenever we decided to do
this?”

“You’re kinda killin’ the mood, Spike.”

“Answer the question.”

“I know you would never put me in danger.”

“And you feel the same way?”

“What?” Buffy asked, her mouth hanging open slightly. “Spike, I would never
hurt-“

She was immediately silenced as his lips fused with hers before
breathlessly pulling away, tossing the condom over his shoulder. “That’s
all I wanted to hear,” he said with a smile as she playfully smacked his
chest.

The mood immediately turned serious as his hand dipped between her thighs,
slowly inserting a finger into her body as her eyes fluttered shut and her
breathing became more labored.

Buffy felt her heartbeat skyrocket as he moved on top of her to settle in
between her legs. “I want to feel you,” he murmured softly, brushing his
lips against her collarbone as his shaft teased her entrance. Pulling back
to look into her eyes, he brushed a lock of hair away from her face. “I want to feel all of you…nothing between us.”

He entered her with an agonizingly slow pace, gently thrusting in and out
of her, getting deeper until he froze completely.

“Buffy?”

Spike stared at her in shock, his mouth slightly open, his eyes wide.

“I didn’t know if I should tell you,” Buffy whispered quietly, burying her
face in his shoulder.

Spike swallowed nervously. She was a virgin. He breathed heavily as he
pulled back to give her a soft kiss. “You still want to do this?”

Buffy nodded, tears shimmering in her eyes. “If you still want me.”

“I always want you,” he said in a husky whisper. “It’s going to hurt for a
minute, baby.”

Buffy’s eyes squeezed shut at he tore through her barrier, her nails digging
into his back. She stifled a sob as tears streamed down her cheeks.

Spike stilled his movements as he tried to comfort her. “It’s over,” he
whispered, kissing her tears away, trying to fight his own emotions for
making her cry. “I’ll never hurt you again, baby, I promise.”

Slowly, her muscles began to relax around him as her hands released their
hold. “It’s better,” she whispered before arching her hips against his.

Spike closed his eyes before moving slowly, sheathing himself fully inside
her and gradually pulling out with long, sure strokes.

They moved together as if they were made for each other. Spike brought her
to her orgasm gradually as Buffy threw her head back as she cried out in
pleasure. Spike followed soon after, gasping her name as he pulsed deep
inside of her.

Minutes later she was laying in his arms as Spike gently traced his
fingertips along her arm. “Why didn’t you tell me?” he whispered.

“I didn’t think you’d believe me,” she whispered, averting her eyes. “You
were so sure that you knew who I was, and…”

Spike closed his eyes in shame as he pulled her as close to him as possible.
“I’m sorry,” he said softly, burying his face in her silky hair. “Will
you tell me now?”

Buffy took a deep breath. “I was dating a guy named Scott in L.A. We were
never really serious, but he always tried to push me to go farther than I
wanted to.” Buffy felt Spike’s arms tighten around her in a rigid hold.
“When I finally broke up with him, he got mad because I never…anyway, he
knew who my dad was, so he called him ‘anonymously’, telling him that his
only child was sleeping with anyone who would have her. And, as you said, the story made it here before I did.”

“So that’s where the hatred with you and your dad comes from?”

“No,” Buffy replied. “That’s where the name-calling comes from. We’ve
always hated each other.”

“I’m sorry,” he whispered again.

“Hey, I’m starving,” Buffy said, changing the subject as she sat up. “What
do you say we head out for pizza?”

Spike had to smile at her suddenly chipper attitude. “I’d have to say, that
sounds great,” he replied, pulling her to him for a gentle kiss.





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