Summary: Set during Buffy the Vampire Slayer Season 5. AU After Crush. Spike decides to return to LA with Drusilla after Buffy rejects him, leaving the Slayer bereft and sending Spike down a spiral of self-discovery that he's not the vampire he once was.
Rated: NC-17
Categories: Serial Fics Characters: None
Genres: Romance, Angst
Warnings: Violence, Adult Language, Sexual Situations
Challenges:
Series: None
Chapters: 14 Completed: Yes
Word count: 51350 Read: 23949
Published: 11/03/2004 Updated: 01/02/2005
1. Prologue by Peta [Reviews - 5] 
(674 words)
2. One by Peta [Reviews - 6] (3625 words)
3. 3 by Peta [Reviews - 9] (4306 words)
4. 4 by Peta [Reviews - 4] (3249 words)
5. 5 by Peta [Reviews - 14] (4300 words)
6. 6 by Peta [Reviews - 12] (3596 words)
7. 7 by Peta [Reviews - 11] (3214 words)
8. 8 by Peta [Reviews - 10] (3528 words)
9. 9 by Peta [Reviews - 13] (5266 words)
10. 10 by Peta [Reviews - 6] (4483 words)
11. 11 by Peta [Reviews - 6] (4077 words)
12. 12 by Peta [Reviews - 6] (3230 words)
13. 13 by Peta [Reviews - 8] (5227 words)
14. 14 by Peta [Reviews - 20] (2575 words)