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Chapter Fourteen

She wasn't home. For fuck's sake, where was she? His mind was running through the possible scenarios as he paced on the deck, waiting for her. Maybe she was still getting Nate. She seemed to really like that Willow girl a lot, she had even babysat for her while she went out with Angel once or twice. He tried hard not to keep track of how many dates the two went on. That only led to his mind playing tricks on him that would lead to drinking and drunk, late night confessions of love. Buffy would kick his arse for that. She hated it when he drank, told him he only became pathetic, incoherent and annoying.

Okay, so maybe she was still chatting with Willow. He stopped pacing and paled. What if she went to get some sexy lingerie before picking up Nate? Oh god, no. His fists clenched at his sides as he imagined Angel being the one to unwrap such a precious gift as Buffy in sexy lingerie. Did he know that her neck was a pleasure point for her? He did. He knew because one day they'd had a discussion on what made their knees wobble. For Buffy it was her neck and stomach. And Buffy knew that on Spike it was his ears being nibbled and his nipples. He just didn't want them to have the knowledge of pleasure points on each others bodies, he wanted to be able to APPLY that knowledge. He sure as hell did not want Angel to experience it!

He heard the car before he saw it and he turned to stare her down. She looked confused. He then saw Nate pointing at him and babbling, a big smile on his adorable face. Spike grinned. Did Nate get that excited when Angel came around? The thought filled him with more jealousy. Did Angel know that Nate loved taking baths and would throw the Sponge Bob sponge against the tile wall and laugh hysterically every time he did it? Did Angel know that Nate had one favorite stuffed animal that Spike gave him when he was just a baby? Would Angel try to replace it and shove Spike completely out of the picture?

"Spike, what are you doing here? Is everything all right?" Buffy asked as she climbed out of the car.

He nodded and started forward, intent on doing something to stop his trembling hands. He shooed Buffy out of the way so he take his nephew out of his car seat.

He picked the tot up and Nate hugged him, wrapping his long, slender arms around his neck. "Missed you, Nate the Great."

Nate smiled and pointed at Buffy.

"Missed your Auntie too."

Buffy looked over her shoulder as she took some bags out of the passenger side. "Just couldn't wait for the aquarium huh?"

"Not really. What do you have there?" He asked, pointing at the bags.

"Oh, uh, just some food and stuff."

"What stuff?" He asked as he followed her to the door.

She gave him a funny look, once again looking over her shoulder.

"Do you want to see my grocery list?"

"Are you having company tonight Buffy?" He asked as she slid the key into the door. She froze for a second, then turned the key and pushed the door open. She held the door open, letting him and Nate inside as she gave him an icy glare.

Setting Nate down, he tore into the playroom and left Spike alone to deal with the wrath of Buffy. He looked at her, almost sheepishly.

"What are you doing here, Spike? Don't tell me you're here because you heard from the Rumor Queen that I was having Angel over tonight?"

"That's it exactly."

She rolled her eyes as she started to unload the groceries. She turned to him, juice in hand. "I have had sex before, Spike. Not like I'm a virgin."

"I know that, but you don't just HAVE sex Buffy."

Buffy peered into the living room to see Nate carrying some trucks. She turned back to Spike. "Are you telling me you're here to defend my honor?"

"Yes."

"Give me a break," she said on a sigh, shaking her head. She opened the fridge and set the juice inside.

"Buffy, you barely know the guy-"

"I'm taking heat from the guy who had sex with Anya on their first date. I wonder if anyone came over before you two went out to defend her honor?" She raised her eyebrows, "somehow I'm thinking not."

"This isn't about me and Anya."

"Well, leave it to me to MAKE it about you and Anya."

"It's different."

"Oh, trust me, I know. Anya will sleep with anything and pretty much so will you."

Spike glared at her, clenching his jaw and balling his fists at his side. "That's not fair," he said evenly, trying to keep his rising anger in check. "And it's not true and you know it." He cocked his head to the side, "that really kind of hurt Buffy."

Her shoulders sagged, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean that."

"Yes, you did."

"Well, to your credit you were with Anya for a long time
"
"And I broke up with her because I knew I wasn't in love with her and never would be."

"Well, you didn't know you never would be. I don't think you really gave her much of a chance."

"Why do you think that is?"

"I don't know. . . you're difficult? After Dru you put walls up."

"Not always. Not with everyone."

"No, I pretty much always reserved the right to scale that wall."

"Doesn't that tell you anything?"

"I'm special?" Was it him or was her face paling?

He moved closer to her, slowly, deliberately, "you are special," he whispered softly and moved a tendril of hair away from her face. He stared at her, taking in her soft skin, her beautiful green eyes, her lush lips. And the fact that she was trembling.

She took a large step back, "so, uh, what is it that you wanted?"

"Why are you breaking your rule about male guests tonight?"

He watched as she swallowed loudly, "because I. . . I really feel that Angel and I should explore the next phase of our relationship. I believe it will be conducive to finding out if we are compatible."

"Well, Dr. Summers, that's quite an interesting theory you have there. Shouldn't you already know if you are 'compatible'?"

"Dr. Summers?"

"You make it sound as if you're conducting a science experiment Buffy."

She looked at a loss for words.

"Let's play a game. The game you always do with me when I'm confused."

She groaned, "oh on, on, Spike. You make it sound as if I'm marrying him. I'm just having sex."

"Buffy, you don't JUST have sex."

"Well, maybe I should start JUST having sex."

"You bloody well will not!"

"Why not?" She asked, her hands on her hips. "Why does this matter so much to you? I thought you wanted me to be happy!"

"I DO want you to be happy!"

"Let me guess: With someone YOU choose for me, right?"

"No."

She threw up her hands, "then who Spike?"

"Me. I want you to be happy with me. I want you to MAKE LOVE-to me-not have sex. I want you to love me because I . . . I love you. I don't want Nate to call Angel dad one day. I don't want Angel to do dad things with him. I want to do those things with him. I don't want you to be with him, Buffy because I want you to be with me."

Her jaw dropped as she stared at him.

He took that opportunity to move closer to her and wrap his arms around her waist. Leaning in, he pressed his lips to hers, tentatively at first. He wasn't sure if she'd knee him in the groin or just push him away. Encouraged by neither happening, he deepened the kiss, running his tongue along the bottom of her lip and then nibg ong on it. Her lips were softer than he'd imagined. She tasted like strawberries and candy. So sweet. When she opened her mouth to him, he moaned as his tongue came in contact with hers, sending jolts of electricity running rampant through him. He gripped her hips tighter, pulling her body flush against his. They molded together perfectly. When he felt her fingers in the curls at the nape of his neck, he groaned with desire and ground his erection into her. Mistake.

She jumped back as if burned and put her hand over her mouth. She stared down at his jean clad erection and pointed at him. "I did that?"

"Yes, baby, you did."

"Don't call me baby, I hate that."

"Buffy-"

"Did you talk to Lorne?"

He looked at her, confused, "about what?"

"Forget it."

"Tell me what you're thinking."

"I'm thinking it's too quiet in the other room and I need to check on Nate."

Strolling into the living room with Spike at her heels, they found Nate engrossed with his toys, moving a car back and forth as he lay on the floor.

Taking her hand, Spike led her back into the kitchen. "Buffy, I told you I loved you."

"I don't know how to respond to that William!" She burst out. Spike was taken aback. She rarely called him that. Usually only in times of distress or when she was exasperated with him. He decided it had to be a bit of both at this juncture.

"Could you say that you love me too?"

"I do love you Spike. I just don't think it's in the way you want me to."

"Bollocks!"

"You haven't given me any time. . . I don't have time to figure it out. . . " She sounded lost now.

He put his hand under her chin and forced her to look at him. "Do you feel that way when you kiss Angel?"

She looked down.

"That's a no if I ever heard one."

"I didn't say anything."

"Didn't have to."

"Why are you planning on sleeping with Angel, pet?"

She looked up at him, staring at him hard. "Because I. . . " she pushed at him. "It's not fair to spring this on me. I don't even know if I believe you! I mean. . . you're just figuring this out NOW? How convenient. Buffy's got a boyfriend and Spike's alone for once in his life. We can't have that now can we? Buffy's meant to be all alone, isn't she?"

"That's not true and you know it. You're just reaching for straws now," he grabbed her arms and made her look at him. "Buffy, look at me. Anya knew, okay? She knew how I felt long before I did. She told me that you always came first, that I was always running after you, that I never ran after her like that. I knew then, well, I started to put it together then anyway. After Faith died, seeing you so hurt. . . it tore me up inside. I wanted to be there for you just like the times you were there for me-"

"You wanted to be my Knight In Shining Armor," she pushed at him. "You wanted to rescue the damsel in distress. I'm not a charity case, Spike."

"I'm not saying that Buffy! God, why do you have to twist everything say around?"

She stared at him, her bottom lip trembling. "I-I want you to go."

His eyes were pleading, "Buffy, no."

"Please just go. I can't think and you're not helping matters-"

"That should tell you something right there."

"Just go, Spike, please!" She sounded desperate.

"Don't sleep with him, Buffy. You don't love him."

"You don't know how I feel about anything."

He answered her by crushing his lips against hers, hungrily. He broke the kiss, and she looked at him wide-eyed, her eyes glazed over and her mouth slightly open. He whispered to her, "don't sleep with him. I love you," before giving Nate a quick hug and kiss good bye.

Once outside, he bit his lip as he stared at her closed door. He was terrified. God, what was he going to do if she had sex with Angel? What would he do if she ended up really loving the ponce?

It was time to get pissed.

TBC...didn't think I'd make it that easy, did you? LOL
Review please!!!!





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