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Chapter 7 – Pretending


Buffy came home from her history midterm about a week later and sighed as she walked through the door. Spike was in the kitchen, grabbing a beer, when she walked in.

‘All right, mate, time to be on guard again,’ he thought. ‘You should’ve just admitted to her that day that you’re as straight as an arrow. That you’d rather shag her than a guy, but no, you set yourself up to play this game.’

“Hey, luv,” he said, noticing her weary expression. “Everything okay?”

She looked at him and smiled. “Well, I’m pretty sure I passed my test,” she said, coming over by him. He smiled back at her.

“I knew you would,” he replied. “You’ve been studying a lot for it. You and Angel both.”

‘Stupid sod has been here this last week, more than I have,’ he thought bitterly.

“Yeah, he helped me a lot,” she said, getting a soda for herself. “So, I was thinking I’d go out and pamper myself. You know, de-stress after the last few days. Since you so rudely pointed out that my roots are showing, I think I’m going to go get my hair redone. Want to come with me? They can bleach your hair back to its usual radioactive color.” He narrowed his eyes at her.

‘There’s no way you’d catch me in a poncy beauty salon,’ he thought, crossing his arms. ‘But that’s straight Spike, not gay Spike. Gay Spike would probably enjoy getting his hair done. Maybe it wouldn’t sting as bad as it usually does.’

“Sure,” he replied. “Sounds like a deal.”

“Great, it’s my treat, too,” she said with a smile. “Well, actually, it’s Dad’s treat. He just doesn’t know it yet.” Spike laughed and tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. She sighed quietly.

‘I wish more guys would do that,’ she thought sadly. ‘I love that sign of affection, even if it’s from an unattainable guy.’

“I’ll take you out for dinner then,” Spike offered. “We’ll make it a celebratory meal. On me.”

“Oh, I like the way you think,” she said. “We’ll get our hair done, dress up, and go out to eat. Three of my favorite things.” Spike laughed, seeing how her eyes sparkled. “I’ll just go and set up an appointment. Any day you’re free for the late afternoon hours?”

“How about Friday?” he asked. She nodded and grabbed the phone book, paging through it. He opened his beer and drank from it.

‘This charade shouldn’t be too hard to play into,’ he shrugged. ‘But I’ll have to come clean, and probably the sooner, the better.’

* * * * *

Later on that night, they were sitting on the couch, watching TV, when a re-run of “Will and Grace” came on. Buffy laughed to herself, shaking her head in amusement. He looked at her, confused.

“We’re so similar to this show,” she pointed out, looking back at him. “I’m Grace, you’re Will, and we’ve already established that Andrew is a dead-ringer for Jack.”

‘Does she really think I’m like Will?’ he asked himself. ‘Didn’t I express the fact before that Will isn’t always a nice guy?’ He paused. ‘Yes, well, I’ve been known to be quite a jerk on occasion, so maybe I am like Will. And isn’t that guy straight in real life? Right, I’m fine. I’m straight and I’m fine.’

“So is Andrew just going to walk in whenever he feels like it then?” Spike asked, motioning to the screen after Jack barged into Will’s apartment. Buffy giggled.

“I could give him a key,” she offered. “I’m sure I’ve got a spare one somewhere.” He growled, and she raised an eyebrow. “Did you just growl?” Spike averted his gaze and frowned. “No way! I’ve never heard you do that before. Do it again!” He raised an eyebrow.

“I’m not a dog who performs tricks for its owner,” he replied, trying to mask how embarrassed he was about her hearing that. “I won’t be commanded by my puppet-master, thanks.”

“I’m the master in this situation?” she asked jokingly. “What does that make you? My mistress?” Spike was shocked at what she said and felt slightly stunned when she burst out laughing. “Can guys be mistresses? That’d be hilarious!”

“Right, bloody funny,” he said, returning his attention to the show, watching how Will and Grace interacted.

‘See, they’re happy,’ he thought. ‘Buffy and I are happy, too, but there’s a connection there between them that she and I don’t have yet. How do I get to that level? She’s comfortable with me, which is good, but I don’t know if everything is right with us.’ He paused. ‘Probably because you’re lying to her, ponce.’

“Spike?” she asked suddenly, her laughter dying out. He looked at her. “We need a Karen.”

“I think three’s enough,” he replied. “I figure I’ve already got my hands full with you, luv.”

“Don’t forget Andrew,” she said. “He absolutely adores you.” She paused and grinned. “Hey, didn’t Jack and Will used to date?” She crumbled into hysterics again before the phone rang.

‘And my night is now complete,’ he thought sadly, shaking his head at the girl beside him.

* * * * *

After she hung up, she returned to sitting beside Spike, who was still intently watching the show.

“That was Mom,” she said. “She invited us over for dinner this weekend. If you’re up for it, at least.”

“Sure,” Spike replied, looking at her. “I like your mom. She’s a sweet bird.”

“And the British terms just keep on coming out of nowhere,” Buffy smiled. He chose to smile back at her instead of replying with a sharp, witty comment about her choice of diction half of the time.

‘It’s the same language, but I’d say Americans have definitely made English flawed.’

“Anyways, she invited Angel, and she said you could bring anyone you wanted, too,” Buffy said. Spike looked at her, trying to mask his feelings.

“You’re bringing Angel?” he asked. She shrugged. “What does that mean?”

“I’ll think about it,” she answered. “Maybe I will, maybe I won’t. Are you going to bring anyone? Mom seems to be interested in your type of guy.”

“Hold up- your mum knows I’m gay, too?” he asked, panicking as she nodded.

‘Bloody hell. I’ve dug myself in deep, haven’t I? Does the whole state think I’m gay?’

“Is that okay?” she asked quickly. “I mean, she asked why we weren’t dating before, so I kind of told her. I’m sorry if I shouldn’t have, but it just happened. Sorry.”

“It’s okay, pet,” he replied with a sigh, sinking down on the couch. “The truth is bound to come out sometime.”

She saw how sad he looked and cuddled up against him. He smiled softly as he wrapped his arm around her shoulders, holding her to him.

‘Well, as long as she’s still with me, I think I can pretend to be gay for a while.’




A/N Just so you know, we’re planning on stringing Spike along for a little while. There’s just so many fun situations to get him into, we have to explore the possibilities :-) Thanks for reading and reviews would be appreciated.





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